Singaporebrides | The Groom Room
10 Common Wedding Planning Mistakes Grooms Make
We’ve listed 10 common mistakes grooms tend to make so you can avoid these pitfalls and stay on the good side of your bride.
Whether you’re a groom who prefers not to be involved in the planning or one who is actively present throughout the process, you’re bound to make some mistakes even if you try your best not to. While these mistakes may not seem serious in the moment, certain errors can ruin the wedding and possibly create problems for your marriage.
To make sure you have a happy wife and a harmonious marriage, we’ve identified 10 common mistakes most grooms tend to make leading up to and during the wedding, so you can avoid them for a smooth and happy wedding planning journey and happily-ever-after.
1. Not spreading the word about your engagementSamantha and Jarred’s “Love You To The Moon and Back” Minimony at Open Farm Community by Justrealle Photography
Now that she’s said “Yes” to marrying you, you should be dying to let the world know that the girl of your dreams has agreed to marry you. Instead, you sit back and let her do the job of letting her and your loved ones know of the engagement, or worse, you simply upload a photo of the engagement ring on her finger with a caption “She said ‘Yes!'” onto your social media and expect it to do the announcing for you.
Don’t rely on social media or your fiancée to spread the word, or let her think that you’re not that excited about being engaged. Once you’ve had time to celebrate your engagement privately, pick up the phone to announce your engagement to your family and friends, or host an intimate engagement party for your loved ones so they can celebrate with you.
2. Being too passive in the planningCherie and Isaac’s Sunkissed Shoot at Lower Peirce Reservoir and Sum Yi Tai by Andri Tei Photography
Grooms are notorious for not being involved in the planning process and leaving everything to the bride. Even if you do not have much interest in picking out a theme for your wedding or you simply want her to have the wedding she’s always wanted, it is important for you to show some enthusiasm and put in effort in the planning. Your fiancée will no doubt appreciate any input or help you offer.
However, don’t offer off-handed input or replies when you are being asked. Instead, always give an honest and thoughtful opinion that is helpful to the planning. You should also bear in mind to never miss out on meetings with important vendors, such as meeting your venue coordinator, shopping for a wedding outfit or meeting with your wedding photographer or videographer.
3. Don’t wait until the last minute to get involvedJessica and Jun Wen’s Cosy Wedding at Arbora at Faber Peak by Knotties Frame
If you do want to be involved in the planning, do it early or preferably right at the start. Don’t wait until your fiancée has already planned everything to voice your opinions and ask to change things. Not only are you not helping her with the load of the planning, you are causing her extra stress and anxiety. So, do join in the planning early and share your inputs with her right at the beginning.
4. Don’t be a groomzillaLianne and Anthony’s Intimate Oriental Chic Wedding at VUE at OUE Bayfront by Tinydot Photography
Some grooms are naturally more involved in the planning than others but when they get too involved, they become a groomzilla. It’s good that you want to be involved in every aspect of the wedding, but try not to get too obsessed over every little detail or override every decision your bride makes.
Your wedding should be a collaborative effort and both you and the bride should have equal say in every step of the planning. So, know when to stand your ground, when to compromise, and when to let her have her way.
5. Overspending or underspending on the weddingJennica and Xin Ying’s Elegant and Timeless Wedding at JW Marriott Singapore South Beach by Antelope Studios
Brides are not the only ones overspending on weddings. Before you start saying “Yes” to everything (because you want her to have the wedding of her dreams), you should have a discussion with your fiancée on how much you want and are willing to spend on the wedding. Once you have a budget in hand, try to stick to it to avoid overspending and going into debt on the first day of your marriage. If you do overspend on one aspect, then be prepared to cut down on spending in other areas to avoid busting your budget.
That being said, you shouldn’t hold on to your purse strings too tightly either. Weddings are big events and naturally cost more than any family dinner or social gathering you’ve had so far. Get a feel of how much booking a wedding venue or engaging a stylist costs by shopping around first before you put your name down on a contract. Then, do your calculations and make sure that your vendor choices fit within the budget that you’ve set for yourselves.
6. Neglecting your groomsmenHailey and Clifford’s Exquisite Wedding at The White Rabbit by Bridelope Productions
Unlike the way brides interact with her bridesmaids from the day she asked them to be part of her bridal party to the appreciation luncheon she planned for them after the wedding, grooms are often guilty of neglecting their groomsmen once they have agreed to be in his bridal party.
Make your boys feel appreciated by taking them out for a nice meal or a boys-only night at a pub, or even gifting them with a small present that they can wear on your wedding day. You can even have a boys’ day out to shop for their groomsmen outfit.
You should also keep them up-to-date on the wedding and their duties, and inform them on what they need to wear on your wedding day, especially if there is a specific theme to follow. Run through your wedding day schedule with them a few days before the actual day to help them get familiar with the flow of events on the day and their responsibilities.
7. Not Dressing upCalista and Christopher’s Big and Gorgeous Wedding at Raffles Hotel Jakarta by Iluminen
If there is a day you should dress up to the nines for, it is your wedding day. Your bride will definitely be all dolled up and dressed in the finest dress she has ever worn, and you should complement her attire instead of turning up looking shabby. Thankfully, grooms today are starting to pay more attention to their wedding day attire and recognise the importance of dressing up for their big day. Many of them also see this as an opportunity to invest in a quality men’s suit that will take them from their wedding day to the office and other social events.
Don’t forget about the small details that complete your look, such as your tie, cuff-links, belt, shoes and even your socks! Choose items that complement the look of your suit to appear put-together and fashionable. If you are getting a brand new pair of shoes for your wedding day, don’t make the mistake of wearing them on the day itself. Nothing can be more miserable than having blisters, so always remember to break in a new pair of shoes a few weeks or months before the wedding to ensure that your feet stays comfortable on the most important day of your life.
8. Don’t overindulge at the weddingLinette and Joshua’s Autumn-Inspired Bohemian Wedding at Hotel Fort Canning by Androidsinboots
We know it’s your wedding and you’re over the moon because you’re marrying the love of your life. But you should also know your limits and bear in mind not to overindulge and end up in a drunken mess before your guests and your newly-wedded wife. The last thing you want to do on such an important day is to embarrass her and yourself, and ruin the day.
If you know you might get too carried away with the drinks, ask a groomsmen to keep an eye on you and remind you not to drink too much. Or, if there are drinks requests you cannot refuse, have one of your groomsmen stand in for you and drink on your behalf.
9. Be prepared for your wedding dayCalista and Christopher’s Beautiful Wedding at Tirtha Uluwatu Bali by Iluminen
From getting your groom’s suit to writing your wedding vows, you should prepare them ahead of time instead of waiting until the last minute to ready them, especially your wedding vows. Don’t try to wing it as you might get flustered when you cannot think of something beautiful or meaningful to say during your solemnisation
10. Forgetting to enjoy the momentCindy and Stan’s Stunning Wedding at Changi Cove Hotel’s Command House by Ivan Seah Photography
Your wedding day is a special day. It is a once-in-a-lifetime event and an important milestone of your life, so don’t be bogged down by logistical matters and worry, and leave these tasks to your bridal party while you focus on being present to enjoy every single second of your wedding day.
Credits: Feature image from A Sun-kissed Summer Love Wedding Styled Shoot at Panamericana by Presentonpixels