So many stories heard..
all so similar but all so unique.
What is marriage meant to one?
What is the meaning of life?
More importantly, how should I move on?
So many similar souls here..
all so similar but all so unique.
A listening ear another to is never too many, eh?
Thanks to all as it's been really therapeutic.
Listening ears of one breakup story after another.
Sorry but, like ah-so watching soap operas giving recommendations of "aiya! This is what I'd do la!!"
Is that all we can offer?
Stories seems all so similar but all so unique.
Unlike what we see from the movies, our group don't do things such as
"Hello I'm Michael".
(Everybody in the room reply "Welcome, Michael. Tell us your story..")
Edgie.. siao!!
ha..
Meetings have never been for buayaing..
as I see each member (guys n gals) having their own charisma and sources of energy to move on.
Meetings have also never been formal..
as across all boundaries, we share something similar deep within.
Assimiliation is faster then we ever know.
We've ah-bengs.. like me cursing and swearing KNNs! about my wife..
to engineers quietly rationaling our thoughts while knucking his spectacles. (Sorry to CS.. *P)
Sadness is indeed contageous.
Meeting up in a group, sighing, pitying each other is not something we do.
Tying our hands and jump off Bukit Timah is the last thing we'll do.
Constructive thoughts, upbeat! funny and learning things in perspective that I've never perceived:
Following outline several topics:
Living alone in your matrimonial home:
- How to answer those busy body neighbour about "where is your wife/husband?"
- How to handle mopping an empty room. Especially the only time you visit them is when you mop them?
- How to save your electrical bills.
- How to eat economically and healthily living alone. (Maggie is bad for you)
- How to handle Popping in your heart, hearing someone opening the door.. hoping that it's your spouse coming back but discovered later it's a false alarm?
Inlaws and friends
- Which would you prefer? Sudden death of seeing everything moved out or helping your wife to move and wave her off into her mother's home?
- Do you break the news immediately to your inlaws or wait till both of you are ready?
- Do you pretend nothing is happening and regularly go to inlaw place for dinner as if nothing has happened?
- Lie to your colleagues and family is PAINFUL and UNBEARABLE (u need help urself).. but should you delaly and break this news when both of you are more prepared to handle the situation?
Legal matters
While none in the group so far are lawyers but..
- What to look out for when you look for a matrimonial lawyer.
- Types of divorce. (I Wanna SUE my wife for adultery.. sorry, no can do in SG. But.. why?)
- Procedures and duration. (What is absolute decree)
- Considerations in determining the matrimonial properties, child custody and alimony
- Why should you Keep all your town council receipts, electrical bills?
How to get over the blues?
- Wanna go through a Self test questionair if you're suffering from a depression?
- First hand encounter of going to see a family/marriage councilor and psychiatrist. (big joke..)
- Depression and insomia medication: Where to get them, types and the clinical implications.
Living thereafter:
- Means of finding motivations in living healthy
- Alcohol and self destruction is bad. How to overcome? (er.. I need help on this. Who can help?)
- Did you quit your job and how long have you been outta job because of this trauma?
- What are the short term and achievable goals you can make to help you to move on?
- Is help group really useful? I've friends that I can talk to.. but can they REALLY understand how I feel? In my opinion, no one can comprehend better then someone in the same shoe.
- We know it's important not to jump from one relationship to another. Feel in the void and recover first. But how do you know when you are ready?
- Meaning of life and religious discussion about why this is happening to me (Whatever your religion is..)
We arrange weekly meets.. join us if you want.
On the other hand, Chin Ling (Forum administrator) organizes online chat every Thursday.
I'm trying to see if I can arrange with him to have a separate room just for relationship problems.
Time is Thursday 9.30pm.
So many stories heard..
all so similar but all so unique.
Com'on. It's a cold society we're living in.
Do your civic duty.
Share your story, help each other and be helped out.
