Support group - Divorce

[dingo_beans]

1& Only:
Yes. We are all online now. Pls subscribe an yahoo account and install yahoo messenger and add me as a contact.
If u've any problem, email me:
dingo_beans @ yahoo.com

 

[dingo_beans]

CHANGE IN VENUE FOR THIS WEEK'S (30/7) GATHERING

Dear all,
As a private function will be held in WaterBoat House this Friday, we are changing our venue to the following:

Embargo. Fullerton Waterfront.
Time is the same: 8.30pm.

I've made reservations and all are welcome. First round of drinks on me. (Cold Sweat drippin)

We'll be there rain or dry. But if you're coming late, please send your mobile no. to me in case we adjourn to other place thereafter

Apologies for the inconvenience caused and look forward to seeing you there.

Xiao Xing: Glad that you've FOUND new life and my congratulations to your wedding. Also.. glad that you've finally FOUND that "Caps Lock" Key. 8-P. Juz kidding. Please consider to make yourself available and join us tomorrow..

 

[dingo_beans]

Hi all,
Unlike the previous ones we had, the chat tonight was really sensational and moving. Especially to Sixth Sense and Fuzz, thanks for sharing. Our heart is with you always.

I know I should avoid sentimental songs. But heck it, giving myself a break tonight to enjoy the blues. Sharing here with you is "Both Sides Now" by Joni Mitchell and it was featured as an anchor song in the movie "Love actually".

(Recommended to be experienced while CD is playing with the lyrics by your side)

Rows and floes of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons ev’rywhere
I’ve looked at clouds that way

But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on ev’ryone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It’s cloud illusions I recall
I really don’t know clouds at all

Moons and junes and ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you feel
As ev’ry fairy tale comes real
I’ve looked at love that way

But now it’s just another show
You leave ’em laughing when you go
And if you care, don’t let them know
Don’t give yourself away

I’ve looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
It’s love’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know love at all

Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say I love you right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
I’ve looked at life that way

But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say I’ve changed
Well something’s lost, but something’s gained
In living ev’ry day

I’ve looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
It’s life’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know life at all
I’ve looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
It’s life’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know life at all..

Written by Joni Mitchell. Published by Gerna/mcps. Licensed courtesy of Warner Strategic marketing UK. 1968 WEA International Inc.

 

[wondering soul]

EVENTUALLY THE LEARNING COMES
(Author Unknown)

After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and
chaining a soul, and you learn that love doesn't mean leaning. And company
doesn't mean security, and you begin to understand that kisses aren't
contracts, and presents aren't promises.

And you begin to accept your defeats with your head held high and your eyes
open. With the grace of an individual you learn to build your own roads on
today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans, and futures
have a way of falling down in mid flight.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get to much, so you
plant your own garden and declare your own soul, instead of waiting for
someone to bring you flowers.

And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong, And
you really do have worth and you learn and learn...and you learn with every
good-bye, you learn.

 

[wondering soul]

Hope reading this help you all to be strong again....

MOUNTAIN DREAMER SPEAKS
By Oriah, Mountain Dreamer, Indian Elder

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you
ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk
looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know
if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened
by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of
further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own,
without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it. I want to know if you can
be with JOY, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the
ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us
to be careful, be realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to
know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear
the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. I want to know if
you can be faithful and therefore be trustworthy. I want to know if you can
see beauty even when it is not pretty everyday, and if you can source your
life on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon.

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I
want to know if you can get up after a night of grief and despair, weary
and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done for the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to
know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want
to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away. I want
to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company
you keep in the empty moments.
-------------------------------------------------------

 

[chinleng]

Hi Xiao Xing,

No worries. It is a common error made by new people joining the forum.

Regards,
Chin Leng.

 

[dingo_beans]

Wondering Soul:
Thanks for the articles. Very inspiring.
I've printed them out and will stick them to my fridge.
More to share.. please?

 

[dingo_beans]

Zorro, Happy&Tired, XiLangKia, Teh Talek, Fuzz, Strawberry, Sixth Sense, Ant,

Thanks for the wonderful and inspiring outing!
My apologies to any if I've said anything that I should not have. I might have drank a glass too many. *burp* :=P

Due to some personal matters, I've to go MIA for a few days and have no access to PC.

Sixth Sense, Happy&Tired: Appreciate if you could continue to keep the group going..

Take care..

 

[sick&tired]

Wondering Soul:

Me too, printed out the articles and will stick it beside my bed (':')

ALL:
The Friday evening gathering was great! At least, I felt much more better than before after the group had shared all their ups and downs and advising each other... Thank you everyone for sharing and will see you all again properly next weekend.

Strawberry:
Hope you will stay longer the next round hor. I know you miss your small strawberry ;-)

Dingo:
Please advise date, time and location for next gathering.

 

[xi lang kia]

Wondering Soul,

i print out the articles,burn them inside a bowl of water, drink it, so i will never forget it...cheers

 

[wondering soul]

Am so glad some of you find the articles help.

Xi lang kia....you really do that?..

here's another one, hope can help ease and enlighten most of you:

How Do You Handle A Bad Day?
by Robert Taylor


Actually there is no such thing as a bad or a good day. Nothing is either good or bad unless your thinking makes it so.

Let's say you are in a bad traffic jam and on your way to a very important meeting. Your thoughts immediately turn to the dire consequences of being late for or missing the meeting entirely. You then think this is a terrible thing to be happening to you.

Then the traffic jam clears up and a couple of miles down the road you encounter a terrible accident. Upon investigation you find the accident occurred at precisely the moment you would have been there had you not been stuck in the traffic jam. The traffic jam becomes at that point a good thing instead of the bad thing you thought it to be.

You say this may be true as far as minor incidents, but what if someone near and dear to you passed away. Surely that would be bad. Not true. Perhaps this was meant to get you started in a new phase of your life which would be extremely rewarding for you.

It seems to be a fact of life that any time something near and dear to you departs, there is always something new on the horizon to replace it. And your life evolves in such a manner there turns out to be a good reason for this change in your life.

Think back over your life and see how often this has proven to be true. Have you ever lost a job you desperately needed and then found a job which suited you and your financial needs much better than the one you had just lost?

Have you ever had a romance turn sour, only to later find the person that really matched everything you had ever wanted in a relationship? At the time we were undergoing the breakup of the romance we thought it a horrible time in our lives. However the new relationship relegated that time in our lives to an obscure memory.

The pain we inflict on ourselves is caused by our tendency to label things as good or bad. When we do not label things as either good or bad we tend to accept them as simply events occurring in the normal process of our lives. This provides a smooth flow in our lives.

 

[dingo_beans]

Consider getting a divorce? Currently serving separation? Looking for another listening ear to hear your problems?

We've online chat almost every nite with equal mix of gals and guys. Response is good and we are growing fast.

Email Dingo_Beans @ yahoo.com with a short intro of yourself and I'll bring you to the group.

Note that this is not a dating club.

 

[sunset]

hi all, i'm in separation too. welcome me plse?

 

[sick&tired]

sunset:

You're most welcome. Kindly send email to dingo beans.

 

[sunset]

hello sick & tired.

thanks a lot. have sent email to dingo beans already.

 

[jeanz]

dear all
was reading most of the postings here as a passer by and came across this posting from a long time ago..brought tears to my eyes..thought i share it with all you here..

posted by moomoo
Posted on Monday, April 28, 2003 - 2:21 pm:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another Touching Story

One fine day, an old couple around the age of 70, walks into a lawyer's office.Apparently, they r there to file a divorce. Lawyer was very puzzled, after havin a chat with them, he got their story....

This couple had been quarrelin all their 40 over yrs of marriage, nothing ever seems to go right.They hang on coz of their children, afraid tat it might affect their up-bringing. Now, all their children have already grown up, have their own family, there's nothing else the old couple have to worry about, all they wanted is to lead their own life free from all these yrs of unhappiness from their marriage, so both agree on a divorce....
Lawyer was having a hard time tryin to get the papers done, coz he felt tat after 40 yrs of marriage at the age of 70, he couldnt understand why the old couple would still wants a divorce...
while they were signing the papers, the wife told the husband..
"I really love u, but i really cant carry on anymore,i'm sorry.." "its o.k, i understand.." said the husband.

Lookin at this, the lawyer suggested a dinner together, just 3 of them, wife tot, why not, since they r still gonna be frends..

At the dining table, there was a silence of awkardness. The first dish was roasted chicken, immediately, the old man took the drumstick for the old lady..
"take this, its ur favourite.." lookin at this, the lawyer tot maybe theres still a chance, but the wife was frowning when she answer..
"this is always the problem, u always think so highly of urself, never tot abt how i feel, dun u know tat i hate drumsticks?"
Little did she know tat, over the yrs, the husband have been trying all ways to please her,little did she know tat drumsticks was the husband's favourite.Little did he know tat she never tot he understand her at all,little did he know tat she hates drumsticks even thou all he wants is the best for her.
That nite, both of them couldnt sleep, toss and turn, toss and turn...after hours, the old man couldnt take it anymore, he knows that he still loves her, and he cant carry on life without her, he wants her back, he wants to tell her, he is sorry, he wanted to tell her "i love u"...
He picks up the phone, startin dialing her number....ringing never stops..he never stop dialing....On the othe side,she was sad, she couldnt understand how come after all these yrs, he still doesnt understand her at all, she loves him alot, but she just cant take it anymore....phone's ringing, she refuses to answer, knowin tat its him..."wats the point of tokin now tat its over...i have ask for it and now i wanna keep it this way, if not i will lose face.."she tot... still ringing...she have decided to pull out the cord...
Little did she remember, he have heart problems...
The next day, she received news that he had passed away...she rushed down to his apartment, saw his body, lying on the couch still holdin on to the phone...he had a heart attack when he was still tryin to get thru her phone line....
As sad as she could be...she will have to clear his belongins...when she was lookin thru the drawers, she saw this insurance policy, dated from the day they got married, beneficiary of coz its her... together in tat file, theres this note...
"To my dearest wife, by the time u r readin this, i'm sure i'm no longer around, i bought this policy for u, thou the amount is only $100k, i hope it will be able to help me continue my promise tat i have made when we got married, i might not be around anymore, i want this amount of money to continue takin care of u, just like the way i will if i could have live longer..i want u to know i will always be around, by ur side...i love u" Tears flowed like river......

 

[dingo_beans]

Hi all,
Just thought that we've enuff of blues in the air. Care to take 5 and humour ourselves with some divorce jokes?

Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked. - by Lois Misiewicz

My ex was a heart surgeon. She ripped my heart out. - by Chaz Schlueter

My wife ran off with my best friend and I really miss him.- by David S. Goldberg

I think - therefore I'm single - Lizz Winstead

 

[me_no_expert]

hey dingo and all... greetings from remote part of China..

Nice to hear that you guys are having good company and enjoying yourself.

Keep your spirit up guys.. will be back to join u guys soon..

 

[dingo_beans]

Husky!! woof woof!!
haha.. calling from one dog to another.

Can't wait to hear your discoveries after "going there watch mountains and think..". Found what your previous life was? What should we do this improve our karma this life? Found any attractive Tibetian "Husklings" to bring back?

Will be having steamboat party in sick&tired's place tomorrow with all the gangs. Hope u can be here man.

I've also contacted boac-online.. and will be going to climb KK on Sept 9-12. Join mai?

We miss u and looking forward to your return.. Juz make sure you don't change your "woofs" to "O-mi-tor-for-woof!!" when u return..

Take care dude.

 

[desert moon]

Hi all,

Just sign the MOA that i will not contest the divorce. Mine is a long story. Even myself found if ridiculous. A friend of mine sent me this, believing it will help by sharing. As now all i work, other than that face the wall.

 

[desert_moon]

Let me know when you guys meeting up.. talk,,chat on net.. etc.. would like to join.. do let me know.. tks.. hope i can join.

 

[humming bird]

hello,
i'm quite at a loss now. today, i learnt of 2 marriages breaking down - a relative's and another friend's. i feel quite helpless, don't know what to do, what to say to them. Dingo, Sixth Sense, my heart really goes out to you so much. I read all the postings, including the archived postings. Your situations are so similar to what i heard today. i am so confused, and so sad, i can't sleep. just last month, my world was so rosy, i only heard from my happily married frens (really? are they really happily married? after today, I am not so sure.will they be so happy tomoro?) my relative broke the news finally, said he'd been keeping it away from us for 3 years - his wife has been telling him "If you wanna say anything to me, talk to my lawyer." she's accusing him of having affairs (he isn't). my heart just bleeds. after almost 20 years of marriage, and one son, she says these things?? ?? can like be dat??

hey, not his fault dat he still looks dapper at 48 years, and v attractive. but he hasn't had any affairs. where got time? he's so busy.

Desert Moon, i learnt something today - most divorces are long stories, complicated, long, heart-aching. am glad you have your work. really. cos one of my frens came so close to divorce/ annulment with husband and wife out of jobs. my relative sounded like u sound now - so numb. its scary man, its scary. i felt so scared and worried when i heard my uncle. uncle said in passing dat divorce is a new beginning. i hope he meant it. cos he sounded so numb. i wanted to grab him and pinch and shake, to check if he's still got human responses.he wasn't like dat before.

Husky Boy, have a good trip ok?

i just don't know how to comfort my uncle and friend.

feel like i'm so useless. i don't know how to tell them that even though i'm not in their situation, i feel for them too and i care lots. but what good does feeling for them do? i can't do anything.

pl pl pl let tomorrow be a better day for everyone. may everyone feel better tomorrow.

 

[desert_moon]

Humming Bird,

The truth is everyday is painful for me. As i said mine is a long story.. the pain is like taking a knife and stabbing right inot it over and over again. It just wont heal. But i am trying to hang on.. trying to walk.. trying to crawl..

 

[crazycar]

hi lost child, understand how u feel. just when u thought that the wound is closing, another knife stab right into the wound again. what's more? the repeated stabbing is by someone u love so much before.

care to share your story?

 

[desert_moon]

Hi crazycar

Ya, i more like a woman and she the man. Story goes, that the problem had been existence for 2 to 3 years. I was neglected..she do not buy it. The last straw was a holiday we went as a family early this year. Guess what she did not even sleep beside me. Thus i did something which was wrong, i got involve w another lady. I did not feel good about it. All the while i have never cheated on her. Though our intimatcies were more like pay day.

The truth was i purposely let her discover it as she is the only 1 whom can stop me. But she do not buy it. But thats the truth.Things got worst and bad. I have not seen my kids for more than a month. Now i work, go home, i feel so lonely. i feel so pain. It was my wife i wanted, no others. but guess she do not see it. Now the pain is i cannot see the kids..till now..bro say be patience..soon.. wish she knows that i love 3 of them so much. But she kept saying i am not taking the responsibility.

I have apologies to her, her family in front of her friends. She do not give me face to me and my family. I guess j have lost her,but the kids are innocent. She kept saying she loves kids so much more than her life. I wish she will wake up and try to reconcile, if thats what she said. I am prepared not to be intimate for the rest of my life, for the sake of my kids. But this is not to be so.

I realise that she and i are very very different. I find it ridiculous is that when a women discover tt his hubby involve w another woman, she tries keep him close. But wifejust told to to buzz off.. and she needs time.. then leave me al alone again.. then get PI to follow me to get evidence. i have been lonely for a long time and its this tt push me off, she ask me to be alone again. YEs, i make the mistake and stumble and am not proud of it. its the family i want.

Anycase now whatever i say now is poison to her. thus i do not say much now. Just wait for the divorce date.. which is soon.. prob end this month.

But i hope she will wake up one day and know that i had love her with all my heart and life. I did make that mistake.. but what caused me to. Like i say its a long story. I make the mistake, i pay. Thus i will live with the regrets in my heart for the rest of my reminding days.

 

[desert_moon]

Well, its a going to be a long weekend... if got any program on for this support group.. do include me, pls.. as i ahve nothing to do.. will drive me nuts...

 

[dingo_beans]

Belle it's a pleasure meeting you in person and hear your story out. You're very strong and resilient!

Desert Moon! Welcome aboard, and team ready for your inspection sir! Sorry to hear your story and the men hope to see you more often. Should you require assistance to install Yahoo Messenger, I'll be at your service and only a call away.
Permission to carry on...

Ice: Remember the forest out there. Let me know if you want this lau uncle to go Mohd Sultan with you.. or go listen to 5566 concert or go hip hop dance class

Fuzz, Ant and the rest.. Thanks for coming.. I know it's far and the taxi fare is hefty. Next time arrange meeting in the East. (Changi village?)

Elvin: Thanks for arranging the steamboat gathering. Great therapy session.

Looking forward to meet you guys on web and outing again..

Crazy Car, 1&Only: Where are you? IM or mail me.
All other broken souls: Mail me if you wanna join us. All are welcome.. (before we start charging professional fees.. haha..)

 

[desert_moon]

Guys,

Thank for last night. It was good as said, all the sharing. Well, as we said bec of our predicament, its not good to disturb pple whom got family adn are happy. We try hang out together.. Sick and Tired and Dingo.. we stay quite close.. so lets have dinner at time.

Dingo.. go luck for your coming interview.

Well,,, good dinner tonight?

 

[desert_moon]

Hi guys,

Trying to plan something tonight... if all got nothign on..contact me..

 

[humming bird]

hello,
sorry for the intrusion. do you guys mind if i suggest to my uncle and my fren to look up this forum? maybe more understanding here for them. today, i listen to them til quite blur. i realise that i actually find it all very hard to follow.(they're not married to each other by the way.its two different cases of marraige breaking down revealed to me in a single day.)

er? desert moon is a policeman or officer in armed forces? therefore dingo said men ready for inspection?

you guys are really all quite nice.

thanks in advance.

 

[desert_moon]

Sure.. birdy... no problem. All are welcome.. anyway we 5 guys had just met for a drink at coffee shop.

armed forces to your question..

Info.. for the rest.. Dingo wants to hand over the Command to me.. but cannot la.. Even when Prime MInister step down.. he becomes Senior Minister.. so another way to put it.. Dingo still in charge.. hahaha... i better post this before he beats me to it.
cheers

 

[dingo_beans]

Lost Child:

Sorry. Me was Hokien Peng in Army and never have the calibre to enter politics. So "Senior Minister"? simi lai eh? me no understand. In my line of work, we call it "volunteer separation scheme", or "early retirement".. or in layman's term: "receiving the big envelope". After retirement, gotta handover to others mah.

Anyway, jokes aside. Me was really "facilitating" and "coordinating".. In the past few months, I've received a lot of therapy from the support of this group and hope that others in the group are feeling the same. Nevertheless, we'll definitely need more to help and actively organize meetings/gatherings and posting to this forum.. Lost Boy: Thanks for your wishes for my interview. My fingers (and eyes included) are crossed. But if my interview goes through, my time would really be an issue to me then. Really don't want to see this group dissolved.. and need your help.

To all currently in the group: Pls.. no more chairman thingie. All take turns to plan out for outings.. and report to the "officer" (lost boy) in charge. ok? heh heh..

Humming Bird: Pls tell your uncle and fren that they are most welcome. Email to Lost Child or Sick&Tired. They will get back to you. (double heh heh..)

Tonite going Fisherman's Village for food and drinks. Meeting at 7.30pm. Any interested can mail them too. (triple heh heh..)

p/s. Juz fulfilling my duty. Hokien Peng's like me is good at.. siam.

 

[humming bird]

hello,
thanks guys

i will let them know, hope they'll join.
i see... ok! Desert Moon: On this National Day, thank you for protecting our country Sir!
Dingo, you've been a very good gel for this site.

All the best to everyone here. Thanks again very much Desert and Dingo.

 

[dingo_beans]

Humming:

Given the oriental culture thingie, it might seems wierd and uneasy initially for them to share such personal problems with strangers. However, the assimilation process is really very very easy. In fact, we find ourselves making bondage that will last a life time because of the similar trauma that we are going through and the kinda level of understanding we have received. (Even friends I've known for 20 years are not as close to me at heart now). What I can say is.. nothing is comparable. Recently I also learnt that many are pasively reading this thread but still scepticle in participating. Unfortunately, not all in the group are as "talkative" as I am. I'll try to convince some to write testimonies about their experiences with the group. Hopefully this will change some perception and drive more to participate. The objective we've here is really to help. It's been beneficial to us in our recovery and we really want to share.

Cheers.

Desert Moon: Rite on sir. Thank you for protecting our country on this very critical day. *burp* (giving blur blur drunken salutes)

(permission to carry on sir..)

 

[dingo_beans]

WHY YOU SHOULD NOT TRY TO COMMIT SUICIDE:

I've been longing to write something about this...

1. I'll start with the obvious ones such as the pain with your parents, siblings and friends that care more for you. They should not deserve to cry and wait for you 24 hours outside your ward. (fortunate enought if they don't have to cry in your funeral).

2. It's REALLY an offence to commit suicide in Singapore. So if you don't want to be waken up by CID (instead of your loved ones) dictating your rights, don't do this.

3. OD (Overdose) is an gruesome experience. Not only do they have to empty your stomach out (lucky if you are completely unconscious), but they also have to connect your veins to various instruments. (painful with blood shooting everywhere).

4. Bill is hifty and cannot be deducted from medi shield. (Lab test alone is almost 2K).

5. The medical record will stay in your profile for the rest of your life.

6. Most importantly, God forbits it... (Call me or read in bible)

 

[sick&tired]

All the support members,

Can see that everyone enjoying n supporting each other on the yahoo chatline and all the outings.

Maybe we should also do some posting of our view for the group here and support those who has yet to be supported by us.

I would like to thank you all for the time, care, support and patience given. I can see that everyone is much more confident and heading the right direction in life! Move on!

You people are superb! Keep up the support group spirit high and friends forever!


PS: Remember to drop a few lines in here....

 

[xi lang kia]

Hi sick&tired,

strongly agree with u,after joining u all,i m not lonely & deserted once more...b4 that,the days were seemed so long to me & times passes so slowly...

now there is direction in life and wats more important is,although we come from different family background & having different character,we r able to share one another sadness/problem/fun together...the common wording we often use..."eh same same hor...my problem same as yours...how come har??...haha",i m relieved after saying this,we r all not alone in this world...

i guess this is fate that bring us along...another route to keep us going on...

to all out there who r having problem..."mai tu liao"(delay no more),come share your sorrow & fun here...there r a lot of doors opening for us,dun lock ourselves inside a doorless room,open up yourself...

 

[desert_moon]

All,

Tks to this group that i have found newfound strenght.
Tks to this group that had help me pass time.
Tks to this group that had help me hope and dare to dream again.

But the best of all, is that because of our similar trials, we have a bond that is beyond comprehend.

But nevertheless, we whom we are. We must dare to love again and that this is a blessing that one must cherish.

Tks that each of you have come into my life and make things real, that there are life after all.

 

[crazycar]

hi sick&tired,

i'm actually very new here. just chance upon this forum. yet to attend any of the outing or online chat. did not have a chance to go online frequently recently as i was still busy with all the legal stuff and such. and of course i don't really have the mood to do anything. things are more or less settle now and i should be able to go online more frequent now or maybe attend some of the outings.

although i'm new to this forum and have yet to contribute anything, i have found this forum to be a good source of comfort. i was feeling so lousy and down the past few months but after reading some of the postings here, i just felt "hey, i'm not the only one in this world facing this." and it felt so much better. of course the hurt is still there and the wound would probably take a long time to heal. but with the support of people, the road forward will be easier which i guess is the prime objective of this support group.

hope to see some of you guys soon.

 

[evielow]

Hi all,

Thanks for the invitation. Would love to join any sessions for the sad and weary. To this date, the problem has not been resolved. But i've made up my mind (98%) to annul. 2% is always there, just in case he's doing something to save this marriage. Stoopid me, ain't i?

I just realised it's so difficult to unknot a marriage. the financial burden from the HDB flat is quite depressing. going to make enquiries soon, can't take this torture much longer.

Btw, i like the list for not committing suicide. It's a real temptation, even though i know it's wrong. Instead, i wish for some illness to strike so that i can die a natural death.

But still, i thank God for this forum. If I'm not wrong, it has given many people a reason to go on for another day. And that is enough for most people. Just another day. Thanks!

 

[crazycar]

hi all,

hee hee... i'm the 1st to report back here.

thanks for the outing. it's refreshing to see so many people in similar plight. (no, i'm not xing zai le huo.) and i can see that the bond within the group is so strong despite the short period of time together.

sorry, i wasn't really good at sharing and i still feel the pain by talking about it. so i left out a lot of details in my story. probably next time you all will hear a bit more.

keep up the good work.

 

[crazycar]

hi desert moon,

too many people yesterday so i do not have the chance to talk to you in detail.

of all the cases, i felt that yours was the one that is most worth savaging. can see that you still love your wife and especially your kids. maybe your wife is just acting on impulse. maybe she will be able to forgive you one day. i hope things will turn out good for you. even if otherwise, i'm sure you are strong enough to press forward.

 

[fuzz]

I would like to express my gratitude to all my folks in the support group.

i first joined the group with many reservations, but after i took the first step, there was no regrets at all.

the group has provided me with listening ears for my grievances related to my separation and has showered me with care and support that i needed sooo much at this point of my life. (i love it most when you people do impersonations of monkeys/ orang utan/ chimpanzee after seeing the picture of the 3rd party to cheer me up!!!!)

i know you folks for less than one month, but i'm already feeling so close to you. the problems related to my separation are still there, but i am gaining the strength to tackle them and to move on.

folks, THANK YOU!(to the power of N)

to the others who are going through the agony of separation, you are most welcomed to join us. i'm sure that you will find joining this support group as beneficial as i do.

 

[me_no_expert]

It's really nice to see you guys after my trip. It's so much easier talking to you guys than to my friends/colleagues in such situations. There is really no reservation in sharing our thoughts and helping each other to move on.

You people are really fun to hang out with.. and I guess I have to improve my SMS skill liao.

Cheers for the group..

 

[crazycar]

hi fuzz,

how come i never get to see the picture???

btw who can hook me up to the online chat thing beside dingo who is always either not log on or idle or go each lunch or go pang sai etc?

 

[crisp_belle]

crazycar,

You may want to contact any of us on mobile and we would be please to assist you.

Usually, our time online will be from 930pm onwards and the peak will be at 11pm.

Thanks for joining our first outing. Will see you online soon!

 

[crazycar]

hi husky boy,

btw remember to send me the lasik thing. my email crazycar2004 @ yahooo.com.sg. thank u very much. nice meeting u.

 

[crazycar]

hi belle,

got ice to help already. but bo lang online now leh.

 

[crisp]

Hi Folks,

It's my time for me to do my reporting liao... Hehehe.....

It's nice knowing you guys, which makes me feel the warmness there. Thanks for bearing with me for lending your listening ears for hearing my sorrows.

Although I’ve just join this group not long, but it seems to me have known you guys for a long time and I’m also glad to see that now we have slowly found back our directions, which we have long lost and we’re on our way to head our new and brighter future.

Well done support members, keep it up !

** To all out there who is having agony on their marriage and have no one else to confide with, we are always welcome you to join us as a big family and open our doors for you to shelter. **

Take care and God bless !

 

[crazycar]

hi all,

was reading this book on silver linings. (i don't normally read, but these days nothing to do.) then was thinking what are the good things that had happened as a result of this unhappy event. come to think of it, there's really some good things that happened. just thought of a few:

1) i lost a wife but i gain 10 plus new friends.
2) i had a free slimming regimen. lost almost 5 kg during this period.
3) i had a closely relationship with my family and God.
4) i feel strongly because it these 2 things can't knock me out, nothing will.
5) i appreciate life more now.

so boys n girls, start to count your blessings.