italianosportivo
Member
Darine, like you mentioned he says his heart may not be with you but when it all takes time.
When he is confused and lost like yourself, everyone wants to escape from this feeling by saying things he/she may not like to hear and subconsiously say things that may hurt each other.
Give yourself and him some time to think it through. It is about managing this calmly. Ask him or yourself more will only make each other say things that you don't want to hear and eventually both had enough to say "I want out and I had enough". Talk to him and say let's give each other time (never put a dateline) and just let everything be natural and that's what I call patience, unconditionally offering one which will move his heart. Remember we should never say he must or should be the one apologising to me then your mentality is wrong. Is he worth it? If he is then just wait.
Don't assume or keep pestering him or yourself. It is only going to push each other away further and further and you know it yourself. It is one-sided to some extent. It really takes time but it depends on how you want manage this yourself, no one here can tell you what to do.
Take this note: If you fall, fresh wound hurts... Everyday and every moment you keep irritating it and touch it will it heal and faster? No... However, over the next few days and weeks you may have to walk slowly because constantly you feel pain and at times you may bleed. It is sensitive whenever you apply medication to it but it will heal eventually. And that is how love is, exactly the same. Then you may ask me, how? If I add salt to it isn't it going to heal faster? My answer, yes...But realistically it will also bleed and feel more painful but can you take it? If you can, it means you are taking a leap of faith to heal it faster, in a way by unconditionally (very difficult) and patiently (even more difficult) to say I will wait and slowly give both parties time to heal if it is worth it...
Wish you well.
When he is confused and lost like yourself, everyone wants to escape from this feeling by saying things he/she may not like to hear and subconsiously say things that may hurt each other.
Give yourself and him some time to think it through. It is about managing this calmly. Ask him or yourself more will only make each other say things that you don't want to hear and eventually both had enough to say "I want out and I had enough". Talk to him and say let's give each other time (never put a dateline) and just let everything be natural and that's what I call patience, unconditionally offering one which will move his heart. Remember we should never say he must or should be the one apologising to me then your mentality is wrong. Is he worth it? If he is then just wait.
Don't assume or keep pestering him or yourself. It is only going to push each other away further and further and you know it yourself. It is one-sided to some extent. It really takes time but it depends on how you want manage this yourself, no one here can tell you what to do.
Take this note: If you fall, fresh wound hurts... Everyday and every moment you keep irritating it and touch it will it heal and faster? No... However, over the next few days and weeks you may have to walk slowly because constantly you feel pain and at times you may bleed. It is sensitive whenever you apply medication to it but it will heal eventually. And that is how love is, exactly the same. Then you may ask me, how? If I add salt to it isn't it going to heal faster? My answer, yes...But realistically it will also bleed and feel more painful but can you take it? If you can, it means you are taking a leap of faith to heal it faster, in a way by unconditionally (very difficult) and patiently (even more difficult) to say I will wait and slowly give both parties time to heal if it is worth it...
Wish you well.