Any Mixed Marriages here? Esp Chinese-Malay Muslim couple

Suhfreya..thats cool.. nosy..nah.. more like in OZy-Australia. Went into the websites and its like hmmm... a bit too out there .. i just want a simple Hadrah like 6 kids.... for 10 minutes.
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I guess i would have to go and source them out lah.....

Oh ya Marnie...in regards to the ring, ive already got the titanium on order and also exchanged the gold ring to a female one! TADA!!! so we still get to keep the ring but its gna be mine instead! woohooo.... its all good.

PS:My girlfrens are all creepy in their sense of humour. I love them loads!
 


hihi emilia ,

my bf is a malay , but i am burmese haha still dating but i am kinda serious on him .. so i do research about those mixed marriages .. hee
 
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he is the first malay bf tht i ever had , and i believe if i love this man i shld learn his culture and religion , but convert sounds still difficult for me. i knoe it takes time ... dunt u all think so ?
 
wow... thats great Snow.. hello! My fiance is also converting too.. he was a bit scared... but now he is fine. He will be converting in april, 4 days before we get married here in OZ!

U see... u have to understand that being a muslim is all not that bad. As a partner i myself get stress..hehehe I wish theres a book that teaches us partners who are having their parther converted what to do. I feel that first of all you have to know what level of islamic knowledge he has. Is he strict? is his family strict? Is he new age? Does he know a lot?

For me, I dont expect Chris to straight away fast or pray 5 times a day... U see, even me as a muslim dont really do that ..well, i try my best lah... but sometimes, u kinda u know... heheh its only human. But if he does it, I thank God for that. All i expect from him is to abstain from drinking, gambling and eating pork, for now. And thank God, he has done all those without me telling him as he is aware of the benefits.
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You see, it took me so long till now to realise the importance of all this and i am still learning. I am not the best of muslim there are but I try to understand what my partner is going into. Its all about acceptance and patience. of course the first reason why he wants to be a muslim is because we want to be together, It is also very important that Chris accepts the syahada seriously. As this is the most important part of being a muslim... The rest will follow. Dont stress yourself out and if you have any questions, i will be more than happy to help you to the best of my ability, insyallah!!

Its all about love at the end of the day!
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Hi emilia , congratulation for ur hb convert !!!
my bf is now 28 yrs old , he is not strict at all , i might say he is flexible guy i ever see .. he nvr ask me to convert but sometimes like u knoe , his sisters used to ask me , are u gng to convert ? etc .. he jus smile after they all not around he asked me , "how do i think about convert " hahaa ..

as for his family , he is the onli son wif 4 beautiful sisters , his parents passed away , 3 of his elder sisters married and staying by their own. the younest sis got bf but soon she too gng to get married.

so far i learn how to shake hands , and some of those naughty malay words. lol :P
 
Thanks snow..it should be ok then. just take it easy. Thats good that they are not tough on you. Coz some families can be quite intense and that drives the non muslim partners away, unfortunately.
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So I guess you are both on the right track. You will have to understand that being a muslim and being in a relationship with a malay person are 2 different aspects. Since i moved here to Australia, I see being a muslim differently from how most Malays practise there.

Obviously in Singapore, the culture seems to be embedded with religion. But here i practise independently. I guess in your situation.. you would have to adapt to the culture first as its kinda first priority there.

heheh. since he have 4 sisters.. hehehe. it will be pretty fun for you...am sure they always get excited over you when u come around? Malay culture is actually very similar to most south east asian culture, so it will be easy! hang around the family for awhile and you'll fit right in. If you feel a need to learn more about conversion, i suggest you go to Darul Arqam at The galaxy near Haig Road/Tanjong Katong area or google them online!

Good luck!
 
Hi all,
Hope i can join in the thread. Currently (desperately) need some advice on wedding stuff from all the seniors here hehe. I'm Chinese-indonesian marrying malay-muslim. I know nothing about malay weddings btw. Getting married early next year and yet to secure a venue!

May I know where u gals having your wedding party? Cause I'm still trying to find venue for all the guests - around 1000 ppl (and still counting *gosh*).
 
Hi Ipz, typically, Malay weddings are by and large. The invite list runs into hundreds and going into thousands. It's usually a buffet and the guests can come anytime between the time stipulated. Usually there's at least a 4-hour time-line. Typically, Malay weddings (being on a big scale) have it at the flats' void decks or community clubs.

I think you need to first figure out what type of reception you want before you decide on the venue so that at least you know whether the venue can take that x no. of people.

My wedding was for about 300 people (adults and kids) sit down buffet at the museum. And that was the max for fire safety reasons etc.
 
Hi Marnie,
at first i wanted a sit-down dinner kinda thing. However, since the guest list is like 800 (tryin to push down d numbers from 1000 haha), I think i can only go for buffet.

I do want like what you have, wedding at museum, which is something not so-common. But I think i have too much guests hehehe. Went to Legends@ Fort canning last sunday, and I quite like the place (they have permanent marquee too!), but too bad can't bring outside caterer! The Halal buffet menu they have is just so-so to me.

Another venue that i'm thinking now is the Sapphire or Emerald Pavillion down in Siloso beach. If it's there, it'll be a beach wedding!!! *excited* but my htb wants to know whether the new siloso beach resort can accomodate us or not (indoor, got air-con versus pavillion is open, natural air-con
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Any of you got any other suggestion where should I check? How bout Orchid Coutnry Club? Raffles Marina? anyone been there or attend wedding there?
 
Ipz, beach weddings are great but you need to consider the logistics and the location. Are you renting transport for your guests for pick up and drop off? Is it included in Sentosa's packages? For alot of the old makciks and pakciks, it may pose a problem. Not so much of the aircon or not.

Have you tried Fort Canning itself?

Worse comes to worse, you can always find a beautiful spot, get tentage (which will work out to be about the same price as a whole venue anyway) and then start planning away. This scenario though you'd probably need to do most things DIY though you'd get what you want at the price that's kind to you.
 
Hi marnie, yes. I know transport is one of the problem. If not wrong (read on website) they can provide shuttle. When I went to sentosa on sunday, i parked at Beach carpark n take the shuttle, stop just at the pavillion itself. What i like about the Sentosa is the fact they already have shelter. I'm not sure how much tentage would cost (heard it's ex?)

I called the Sentosa sales, they said to rent the pavillion is $6K, can use the beach front as well.

I am thinking of Fort canning as another option (somemore location is in city area), the park itself as you suggested he he, since I haven't seen the place yet, so I'm not so sure.. I went to Legends on sunday night. I thought that's the only space available! But today i read on other forums and went to National parks website, they do have space for rentals! Thinking of going there on Sunday to see.

Other than that, yeah, myb you're right, I can find a beautiful spot and get tentage. I shld consider dat too.

Thanks Marnie!
 
hi ipz,
it's nice to meet you... thought i could help you out a bit...

i hope you can find a nice spot for your wedding, when is it? I'm still going a little bonkers on finding venue as well. my wedding's in oct, anybody know if that's a popular month?

about tentage, i've engaged istana weddings and they don't sub-con any of their services (decor, catering) so the equipment's all their own. For a tent that's 18 x 16ft that includes lights, fans and lining it's $200. a gazebo which kinda looks like an upside down funnel that's 18x18ft costs $800 and covers abt 4 tables. For about 25 tables, we're getting tentage that costs $3500 for a venue we don't know if wecan secure yet! :P tents are known to cost a bloody arm n a leg..! but if you want an outdoor wedding, it's something you have to get.

i'm told by istana that other outfits rent their tents at a higher price becos they sub-con.
if you want to source, just check the yellow pages likely you'll find something within budget.

outdoor dos, remember you'll have to think of everything, as in, transport (like marnie mentioned), toilets, electricity if it's like in a park or something and do it yourself. any of the national parks are available for rent as they say on their site at very affordable rates, but then you have to think of all these wonderful logistics.
If you're lucky you can hire a decor company that can pretty much do all that for you... (hmm maybe istana has a package for that, dunno) but if you get your wedding done at sentosa, ooooh that'd be BEAUTIFUL!
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personally, i agree w marnie, the DIY way is the way to go...with a little help from some packages that fit the bill lah...but it makes the stress so much more memorable in a fun way (i hope).. hahaha...

Goooood luck!
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me
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Hi Suhfyera.. Nice meeting u too!!

thanks for your suggestion. And now that you mentioned toilets!! I don't know whether Fort canning one has any toilets!! hahahaha I know the sentosa one, they have toilet adjoning at one side for use (which is a plus point i guess)

I'm thinking of having mine in early feb 08, dunno whether it's still available!

Your AD is oct 07? that's very soon! I'm having 2 dates cos I'm indonesian and my HTB is Singaporean. All my relatives are in Indo, and His relatives are all here in S'pore.

My Indo party (engagement), will be on 6 Jan '08, venue secured already. Both my sisters are helping me to arrange the whole thing, while I'm in charge for the s'pore one.

I hope both of us can find good venue for the wedding!! Gonna hunt for more venues this Sunday!!
 
hi.

i am having my wedding in jan08.
but my marriage is not of mix marriages.
so is it ok if i still chat here?

its so hard to find topics relating to malay wedding in this site.

i need to ramble a bit abt the joy and misery of planning a malay wedding
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Hey Iheart you and Snow!

Gosh, a few days here and I think I missed a couple of interesting posts above.

Ah yes, the joys and misery of planning a malay wedding. Makes you want to cry and laugh at the same time, yes?
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I remembered I was going on and on lamenting the hard times I had planning for ours. Terrible me.
 
heheehehh...so funny..welcome iheartu and ipz.

aiyah...too late for national parks venue for me...hmmmmm i didnt know they rent out areas. i've always thought it would be nice to have a gazebo/tent wedding by Chinese Gardens or Japanese Gardens. Perhaps one of you girls should try that... its a beautiful area and the MRT is around the corner too!

ipz: 800 is a tough number to accomodate. my 350 is already restrictive. I wanted ACM like marnie, but its impossible. Yeah it will be wonderful to have it at sentosa, but the makcik/pakcik will be the leceh ones too accommodate, transport, distance, sakit kaki (leg pains).... which stopped me from the Hilltop venue at Bukit Batok as well. Its a beautiful spot though! *sigh* I ended up at chevrons which can accomodate maximum 550 people.

Marnie... i am already booked with Wedding sutera...
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finally! yipee..managed to come to a compromised cost!

Oh ya... my mum have decided to have another kenduri( small party?) in malaysia for my family who cant come to the december singapore one.... yeah coz 350 people is far too little for a proper malay wedding... I think after all this is over .. i got a feeling it will reach the same number as you ipz- 800. the irony of it all... :P
 
Hi emilia, nice meetin u here

Well, my htb just told me, the number confirmed ... 1000ppl!! *pusing kepala*
Tonight goin to meet his parents after my class at darul arqam to discuss (budget, guest list, etc etc not sure haha)

True, sentosa one might b problem for older ppl. But i kinda like the idea of beach wedding, it's more relax kinda feeling ( i think ), and yesterday i got some photos of beach set-up wedding (i likeeee *drool*)

Just got an email from Istana Kampong Gelam about having wedding venue there. But now they don't just rent out the space. Must use their selected vendors:

1)Puteri Catering for F & B
2)Istana Wedding Services for F & B and Décor
3)Tepak Sireh Restaurant for F & B, Décor etc

Any idea on these vendors? I know Istana wedding quite well known. How bout Puteri Wedding? and Tepak Sireh?

I was thinking of using Rasel Food Fusion, if i ever need catering. Cause i find their food are quite modern, not the usual.

Need to ask you gals, what's your opinion of having fusion food for Malay Wedding, do you think the pakcik makcik will be able to eat?

In my opinion, you see all these food (nasi briyani, ketupat, achar, rendang, etc) everyday, might even eat it 3-4 times a week. Then u go wedding also eat same food? Isn't it boring?

Or issit just me? hahaha.
 
Oh yeay for you EJ! We were in discussions with Wedding Sutera but the cost was a deterent for me cos' I wanted our already small budget to accomodate my other whims and fancies (a girl has got to have it all for her once-in-a-lifetime wedding, right?)
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I have a feeling that your total nos. of guests is going to far exceed the initial no. with the 2 parties combined! But it'll be fun to have 2 (or should it be 3 with the one in Australia?
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Ipz, our wedding menu is a mish mash of foods from different cultures. Let's see...We had the usual briyani rice and stuff (rendang, prawns, sweet sour fish, etc) but we got indian sweets, blue lagoon as drinks and indian, arabic and malay sweets for desserts and a quirky 3-tiered wedding cake for dinner. For our after solemnisation mocktails party, it was cupcakes, popiah, different flavoured breadsticks, tuna puffs and lingonberry sizzle as drinks.

We had to compromise cos' (1) we had a wedding at an un-malay venue (2) un-malay type of reception so, having familiar malay/indian foods help to tie everything up with little gestures that are modern that are us. But we love the usual foods too!

Re. caterers, I've not tried Puteri (I think) though I thought I had some before...Hmmm.....Tepak Sireh, a no no cos' when I went to actual weddings at Tepak Sireh restaurant itself, the food was cold and they under-catered and the quality so-so. But then again, food like everything else is subjective.
 
hi i heart you
welcome to the thread (cheh, like i own the place aje)... ;) malay weddings can be a headache trying to please everyone and above all our own whims. and his, i shouldn't forget his. hahaha!
but we try n enjoy, no?
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it's a celebration of culture i guess, if you can come to terms with it...heheh

ipz
i asked sri warisan also for venues but yup, as you mentioned they don't rent out venue alone and their packages are exorbitant!

Catering: i've heard lots of negative feedback on tepak sireh (i told the girl at sri warisan precisely this), bad service, food quality poor.. my fiance who has to deal with vendors in his work and that requires high standards, also said similarly. i trust the man.

Puteri is goooood food. i went to my two of my cousin's weddings who used Puteri and thought it was yummm.. there was black pepper prawns and satay and roti kirai and the poor dude doing the kirai was sweating away (the satay n kirai were 'live' stations).

Istana - I taste tested their food, good stuff. very clean set up. I wouldn't say it's amazing food like the kind you get at certain coffee shops..but i'd compare it to say, hotel standard briyani, you know where it's good, but not like the real deal, know what i mean? but i definitely wouldn't say it's bad. My aunt said it's good (the makcik vote is v impt). if you go to the majalah perkahwinan forum and can figure out the malay, there's nothing bad abt istana...

puteri is slightly more ex than istana. istana decor definitely better than puteri. Puteri sub-cons. but both food is gooood.

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oh! and ipz i totally get what you mean with wedding food being boring.. i don't get it either, one can easily get briyani any time of the week! But it's what ppl want apparently, and i can't fathom this, but hell, we won't be eating that much on the day, right? heheh...
i dunno, to each his own...
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Suhfyera : glad that someone has the same opinion as me on the food hahahha. I guess Tepak Sireh is out (so many bad comments haha). They showed me the Puteri menu, which is the very 'common' food. Well, later will discuss with my future in laws.

If I were to put briyani in my indo wedding menu, i think it would be fine (even a popular stall!!), cos ppl there don't get to eat this type of food.

Iheart You : Welcome to the thread, me also joined recently only. The gals here are all nice and helpful kekekeke.

It's good that we have this forum!! I don't know who to talk to. My family don't know bout malay weddings, I'm also clueless. Can't really talk to my friends here (none of them knows bout the wedding yet hehehe) Talk to future mother in law? Aiyoh, Scary!!
 
alamak.. i wrote so much and the comp crashed! anyways.. i wanted to tell u ipz not to go for tepak sireh.. bad reviews big time. and istana is apparently popular amongst the malays! and Rasel is above average. i dunno much about puteri.... .

hmmm..and Marnie.... how do you know? Yes i am going to have 20 people for the OZie one. Mother's idealah and this time Chris wants it too... he was very suportive about this one more than others! So we are going to do the nikah/civil in a tiny indo mosque and the luncheon at this cool restaurant called AGUNG where we are having an INDO WEDDING RICE - nasi tumpeng... very exciting.... all coz my indo chinese housemate- Endang have not eaten nasi tumpeng for ages and thinks its perfect for the wedding! Chris is full on about the idea too.. he is excited to eat yellow nasi which look like a gunung (mountain) with all the sambal, ayam, sayur all around it. Asian eater at heart this one. hehehhe .

Oh ya... also i want to take advantage of the landscape and do my photoshoot here lah.... got river, parks and its nice here during easter. My housemate's partner will be taking the photos. bless felix!
 
ipz..tell me about it many of my frens dunno too, dats why i am rambling lke crazy in here.. and chris of course is tired of his bridezilla! heheheheh. girls... u can all ramble all u want..we are here to listen ...hehehehahh *wink*
 
ej : nasi tumpeng .. Wah, it's been a long time since i ate that too!! Where is this Agung resto? in Indonesia??

Indonesia got lots of places nice for photoshoot, like Bali, Jogja, Sukabumi, etc etc but it's very Expensive!! I got a friend (but he's damn rich la) he spent like 80 million rupiah (approx. S$13,400.00) for photoshoot in Bali!! Me on the other hand, not willing (well, can't afford as well) to do that ha ha ha.

Last nite talked to future in laws, they're quite interested in having the wedding at the Malay Heritage Ctr (within budget). Fort canning and Sentosa is out as Marnie was mentioning about the pakcik makcik will complain (so saaaaaaaad... :'( ) But i'm concern about food selection. Although i don't have any relative here, but my immediate family members are not used to briyani food! I've called Puteri to ask for more menu selection.

*haiz* another day and another search for the venue that everybody will like.
 
emilia, rambling is good! kekekek... totally agree...

talking abt indo food, man, if i had a choice my wedding food would be either north indian, italian or real padang food.. like ayam pop and batokok and all the good sour spicy stuff..! sigh...

ipz malay heritage centre is quite nice, but i'm being totally subjective here. you should pop by in the evening, with the lights and the fountain it's quite picutresque. I went w my best friend and she said it looks really similar to burkill hall at the botanic gardens; she had attended a wedding there.
i'v egot a pic of this malay musical ensemble performing there, it's quite a nice shot of the location, lemme try n figure out how to stick it in here...
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suhfyera : thanks for the info. I do like the malay heritage centre as venue. Just not sure about the decor and food. I went to the istana wedding website, and I don't know when are those picture taken, but it's not really my style. I'm still waiting for more menu selection from Putri Wedding. Hope they have more interestin menus other than the Briyanis (no offense to briyani fans k? kekekekke)

I use to hang out around kampong gelam a lot, so I know the area quite well hahaha. Reason being, last time every saturday my little brother has tuition at Concourse building. So i used to park my car at kampong gelam to have teh tarik.

Talking about Teh Tarik, I miss the Teh Tarik there!!! (Must tahan must tahan, must look good in wedding dress). Hey, then if i hold my wedding At MHC, myb i shld invite the teh tarik uncle to make teh tarik for the guests ha ha ha
 
oh ya, the photo looks very good btw!! hmm i can imagine the place lit with candles ... but that is if i'm having it in the evening he he he
 
ipz.... am getting married at 3 places..sorta... the nasi tumpeng is in Melbourne, Australia... the indo community here is tite... super tite.... can get authentic indo anywhere....
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and taking photos at melbourne's parks... not bali lah.. aiayah where got money...

Ya, u shud have live music.... beautiful it will be!

Suh.. i think i will have traditional malaccan food during my malacca reception and in singapore ... normal buffet i guess from raja emas.. they do catering for orchird country club, and i tasted them before and its good...but that was yonks ago.. hope still good lah.

I did thought of MHC as a venue , but when i think about seperating guests inside and outside,... i dunnolah.. i feel odd. Marnie executed it well, but i think it will be one thing i wont be able to convince my mum. I mean she already have to accept the 350 guests only, one go within 3 hours( After gaduh-ing with her for 3 days! hehehehahah).
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ej : for MHC, If i'm using i'll be using the lawn area.. not inside he he he. Today i talked to the lady at MHC, she's quite nice. She said can try to accomodate our requests, but cannot use other vendors he he he. Like instead of half day (6 hrs duration) use of the space during the day, we can take the 6 hrs in the evening...

Wah, u're getting married in 3 places? WOW!! I know indo food in OZ is good! Not sure bout Melb, but I know Sydney one is good!! I used to stay in Sydney's indo area (kingsford), can buy anythin from indomie, indocafe coffee mix, to petai!

Yes I also wanted a one go kinda party instead of whole day kinda thing.. very tiring leh!!
 
wah, seems like everyone very busy he he he. Ã went site visit again during Sunday. Got excited over possibility of having my wedding at S.A.M, but today feelin disappointed again
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I've called the lady in charge. She said, she's not yet to take any bookings for '08. Can only confirm in Sept/Oct!!!! *darnn* Because they haven't confirm the dates for internal bookings (exhibitions, events organised by museum etc etc) *haizz* She said, better only to consider SAM as 2nd option... anyway, I've put my name on the waiting list *hiks hiks*

But the lady recommend me another place, Reflections @ Bukit Chandu, anyone been there? She said the place is nice, very private .. but have to charter bus (lotsa ppl got lost on da way ha ha). Myb i'll go down n take a look this Sunday ...
 
yes i was thinking of bukit chandhu but chris takut mosquitoes- he so selenger in that sense! hehehe and he said December is monsoon lah, wait rain lah, too humid lah... I gave up! ...and also coz its very exotic and on top of the hill, you have to check accessibility. IF am having a rawkin cocktails with 100 of my friends.. I do it!
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Oh ya..why doncha try PS CAFE at Dempsey... they have a ncie yard.... alot of trees.. beautiful area!

Ipz, you should check WEDDING BANQUET thread for help.. thats how i came to my conclusion!

PS: Oz is INDO CITY! :P
 
ej : i went to Bukit Chandhu at bout 9.30pm, I know they're closed on Monday, but anyway the place is very 'ulu' outta the way! We got lost!! The lady from SAM already said about renting shuttle bcos it's hard to locate the place. And at night it's so dark ... kinda scary hiiii... But you're right.. from the photos the place looks good, i mean if it's only me and friends, i'll do it too.. but you know la.. the makcik pakcik will surely complain!

i think i really need to check the 'wedding banquet' thread again then.. one by one he he he. Thanks for the reminder.

ps cafe ... not halal rite? i know it's nice there too! Did consider that area, in fact, i've e-mailed them but no reply.. Myb i'll call them tomorrow.
 
yeah..ps cafe not halal.... i wonder if they can accommodate though.... like Bali Villa, the rental is kinda ex.. but they can accomodate halal.... Nowadays, somehow ..singapore is a little bit kinder in regards to Halal accomodation. Theres a lot of nice places BUT the issues we are facing will be 1) Halal availability at venue 2) Accomodating the numbers we have.... So you must at all times, be aware. When is your wedding again?
 
ej : i'm thinkin of having it one mth after my indo party, which is in 2 Feb 08. So again, the search continues ... he he he he
 
Hi <blink>Girls</blink>! So long neber visit this thread liaoz...haha..am so busy wif work and wedding stuff! Whoa seems like there's a NEW generation of ppl going on here yea! hehe...
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3 more months to go for me, I have alottt to do still!
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hhaahaa...btw I'm looking ard for good emcee/DJ who can speak fluent english and malay. ANy recommendations? hahaa...
 
hello hello....

been very quiet in here.... hope everyone is doing well..

I have a question. What's your take on the merging of cultures, and if a tradition in question has roots in another religion other than your own, would you still observe that tradition?

an example would be, would you practice yoga if it's roots are in hinduism and jainism? Or.. would you have christmas dinner not to observe the religious aspect but just to get together and exchange gifts? or... would you exchange bunga telur and sireh dara if it's roots are Indian and hence Hindu in origin? same goes for henna...
Where would you personally draw the line?

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me
 
suhfyera, i think it's up to the individual ..

personally i have no problems celebrating christmas or new year, etc .. i celebrated christmas ngan my husband and sofi last year .. he selalu celebrated christmas ngan his family and last year was the first time he was away from them so we decided to start our own family tradition .. nothing religious about it at all .. just dinner (cooked too many dishes!!) and exchange of gifts ..
 
i agree with cuclainne. It is personal preference. Even after I convert, I would still pray to my ancestors during QingMing festivals or other occasions. During my BCI course, the ustad said before that there is nothing wrong with paying respect to ancestors, even using jossticks only that he mentioned that we shld try not to bow.

For me, I don't see anything wrong with having christmas dinner, or doing yoga. I love yoga (but too lazy to do now ahhaha). Yoga is an exercise rite? It is not like it's a religion.. It helps to eliminate stress (for me), and give me peaceful and relaxing mind (as well as burning FAT!! ha ha ha)
suhfyera, mayb if you're not sure, you could call Darul Arqam? I'm sure they would be able to help.
 
hey all,

thanks, i was just looking for various responses and thought processes.

It has come to my attention tho how interesting it is how there will be some practices that are ok to some while other practices are considered deviant. Even myself, i have been biased for some practices and yet against others, and recently realised that i'm simply being unfair...

I have always celebrated xmas in terms of dinner with my family (we're born muslim), and gifts and school xmas pageants as children and i agree, nothing religious. i also celebrate birthdays which are paganistic in origin (as are christmas trees i found out). The gregorian calendar we all refer to is in accordance to the date Christ was born. Certainly, there are malay wedding practises that are hindu in orgin like the bunga telur i mentioned and the henna, believed to be a symbol of fertility and to ward off evil, respectively...

So, obviously everything's an amalgamation now and it's difficult to draw the line between what is deemed 'deviant' and what is not. Perplexing, but interesting to note...

Thanks for listening all...
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suhfyera

p.s. there was a talk i attended once where the ustad discouraged muslims from the practice of yoga. "how can we blank our minds and not think of Allah?" i thought his mind maybe cannot multitask.. hahaha! i'm a yoga teacher.. ;)
 
what? discouraged yoga? hmmmm thats bizzarre.. why discouraged something that is good for you?
I agree with the rest. I mean for me is that you can participate and celebrate something even if it is out of your normal belifes as long as you do not religiously believed in it... put faith to it? You know what i mean? If you do something out of respect or tradition but not uphold the inner content of it thus defying your religion, then i say no lah.alamak i am repeating myself.

but what i mean is for example, if chris' folks want us to go for a church wedding, i still will, but on what grounds?
On grounds that it is traditional for the family... but what about the church praises and belief... well, I wont participate in that lah, but if the family wants to, go ahead... they are praying for goodness, not anything bad, kan? The reason why i am opened to this is coz i was at a celebration of such here in Oz. It was quite amazing where the guy is a muslim and the girl is a christian converting.... They had a church wedding... when it comes to prayers, the guy just stood there and respected it. There were like 10 muslims present and all were very much relax. i was the one who was freaking out as it was new to me at that time. But afterwards i find out why so now its ok! i am cool with the idea.
 
yea emilia, that's totally it! i was thinking about it on the way home on the bus (cos you know that's all you can do on a bus - think!) celebrating it as something positive but not put any religious weight on it if it is not in line with your own faith..
Traditional for the family - that's a good one.. Thanks!

Anyone else experience anything like this?
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haven't been postin for a long time.
hello rizaclark!

just attended a fren's wedding reception yesterday. The groom's muslim and the bride a chinese convert. it's heartwarming to see the union. they have been together for a long time, but did not marry due to some objections from their family members.
although i do intend to marry my bf and i hope to convert within the next 3 years, somehow i feel apprehensive. there are so many things to learn and as both my bf and i are rather stubborn, i forsee many disagreements. hopefully they will turn out well..
i have a question, if i convert, do i get to choose my own name? as my name was made up by myself, jerine, and has no religious links, can i use it still? just curious.
 

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