Guess what the lawyer said when I asked?
"The system won't change for another 100 years".
This is coming from an expert who has dealt with enough cases to make a point. I would trust that. Take it or leave it. I'm only providing advice for people to protect themselves first. Would still advocate cohabiting without a marriage cert. People in America do it and are happier because they don't have to fight in court for years and go broke. That actually led to the legal system giving more rights to men because people would not get married anymore. A marriage cert here is only good for hdb flats, nothing more. No couple ever needed a marriage cert to stay together for life, so why should they now? As long as people don't cheat or go back on their words, and are decent people, what is the point of a marriage cert other than being recognised by a lopsided legal system? And when people change, they leave, at least both parties don't donate to lawyers for them to watch a catfight. Rational people don't drag each other to court to fight time and again. Yet I see people do it for money all the time.
Just making very rational valid points that don't support the marriage system here. Until they change for the better, people need to dig deep for loopholes so they won't be exploited.
Another rational step to take is to honour prenuptial agreements over any "common" divorce settlements. Couples can sign and agree how to break up if things don't work, while knowing what rights they have afterwards. They can draft up custody arrangements and other plans before taking the plunge. Cheaper, faster and better divorce than one where people slug it out in court. If the government is serious about reducing acrimony, this is one way to go, as there would be minimal disagreements in divorce if a prenuptial agreement is drafted in a comprehensive manner. The courts can stop the fighting simply by showing such a legal contract as legal binding.
To be fair, another self defense tactic is to collect marriage cert in China too. I heard the men there got way more rights and women are bullied there. Kind of balances the forces at work. Though not sure how a divorce would work in this case as it may be fighting in two countries. Or simply don't get that cert.
I'm the type who can stick around for life. Unfortunately, once bitten twice shy. Seen the worst kind of people and have a completely different mindset as to what is a proper union. Men and women are equals and neither party should be given more rights over
Yeah you "staypositive" are the only one in the whole world who is not biased compared to us all lol.
Are you even reading what you write?
We the "biased" bow to your infinite wisdom, oh perfect one.
I agree that's why I wonder why you keep saying the guy should reflect that he at fault too cos he marry her etc. Isn't that just more fault finding only for the guy?
Better I think is to just move on past the pain and hate don't talk about whose fault. Your method of asking the guy to take fault (it takes two hands to.clap blah blah) which inevitably leads to an argument does the exact opposite of makes it into a fault finding fight.
This does not even signify a response except to say you are a hypocrite that lectures people on negativity and you turn around and say such vile things wishing ill on people you don't know and predicting the worse.
All I can say is unlike you I've been there.
Like sadguy, infernolord, life_is, meiji etc I've suffered almost unbearable heart break betrayed by girls (some of you know my story). I admit it hardened my heart I became bitter and cynical until I was kinda like life_is now. So yes I understand and feel for him though I don't agree 100%.
My wife changed this, meeting her was the most perfect and best event ever in my life. She almost literally saved my life.
I know life_is thinks I'm stupid for marrying her, because yes maybe in the future she will change.
You think I didn't think of that? I'm no longer some innocent kid on his first love or the ever optimist infernolord who clings on even when.its obvious it won't last.
Despite my traumatic past I *choose* to take the risk because she's worth it. She's earned my love many many times over . I pray most of you who were hurt in life find the happiness I have..
Hello! Disagreeing with you does not equal.spread negativity . You really have a funny definition of spread negativity.
Honestly i think you really have no clue what you are saying and have no experience at all.
You just lecture guys on and on no matter the situation, never once I see you show sympathy or empathy like many regular posters who talk about how this reminds them of their past or share petsonal feelings.
You just want to act like you know everything and you act all offended when people not just me disagree with you.