Singaporebrides | Essentials

December 2017

5 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Compare Your Wedding With Others

It’s almost impossible to not compare your wedding with another bride’s, but you really shouldn’t, and here’s why.

As someone who’ve been in the shoes of a bride planning her wedding, I can tell you that it is only natural for a bride to want a one-of-a-kind wedding and compare her wedding with another bride’s. And with the Internet and social media providing access to some of the best wedding inspiration and real weddings, it is not difficult to see what others did for their wedding and do better for your own. However, I can tell you that this need to compare is unnecessary and robs you of the joy you should be experiencing during your wedding planning journey. Here are five reasons why you should stop comparing your wedding with others and how you can curb the need for comparison when planning your big day.

1. Your Wedding Is Not A Competition

AforArcade Founders Min and Collin’s Beautiful Wedding at Grand Hyatt Singapore by AndroidsinBoots

While it is undeniable that the Internet and social media has made wedding planning infinitely easier and fuss-free for modern brides, this access to unlimited wedding ideas and inspirations from all over the world, ranging from big, elaborate weddings to intimate, do-it-yourself celebrations, has raised a competitive spirit amongst brides.

Brides compete over whose wedding is more beautiful or Pinterest-worthy by comparing how different their venue is or how much flowers they have at their wedding, but having a unique venue filled with an abundance of flowers doesn’t make a wedding more special and memorable than one that doesn’t have these elements.

Do This Instead:

To prevent yourself from falling into the trap of obsessive researching and comparing your wedding and competing with another bride, get off the Internet and your social media once you’ve decided on a wedding look. Focus your energy and effort on filling your wedding with moments and components that represent who you are as an individual and a couple, and your love for one another instead of obsessing over whether your wedding flowers look as Pinterest-worthy as someone else’s.

2. Every Wedding Is Unique

Gayle and Marc’s Bohemian Backyard Wedding at Wheeler’s Estate by Andri Tei Photography

Every bride wants their wedding to be unique, a celebration that none of their guests have seen or experienced before. So, they go the extra mile to make sure that their big day is one-of-a-kind. But they don’t realise that their wedding is already unique without them putting in any extra effort. Like how no two individuals are alike, no two weddings are the same, despite their similarities.

Do This Instead:

Don’t plan your wedding with the mindset of planning a never-been-seen-before celebration. Plan with the intention of making your wedding unique to you and your groom by incorporating elements that represent you or the things you share a love for. Having these meaningful additions to your wedding will keep you from comparing with others and naturally make your big day a one-of-a-kind celebration unique to only you and your groom.

3. There are no ‘shoulds’ or ‘should nots’ when it comes to weddings

Freida and Winson’s Beautiful Sky Garden Wedding at iFly Singapore by Darren and Jade Photography

Floral arches and bridesmaids’ gift boxes have become a staple in nearly every modern wedding and you feel like they should be part of yours as well even though you may not have the budget for it. The truth is, there is no ‘should’ or ‘should not’ when it comes to weddings, and you definitely do not need an arch or gift boxes for your girls to get married, especially if you need to go beyond your budget to include them in your wedding.

Do This Instead:

While they make a nice addition and touch to your big day, don’t feel obligated to include them in your wedding just because someone else did. Every wedding has a different budget, so feel free to leave any unnecessary elements out if you don’t have a budget for them. Or, if you are determined to include them, you can choose to replace them with a pocket-friendly alternative that meets your budget. So instead of a full floral arch, opt for an equally dreamy arch draped with romantic tulle or chiffon with florals at one corner.

4. Weddings are about having fun

Mindy and Kenneth’s Descendants of the Sun Inspired Wedding at Four Seasons Hotel by Lightedpixels Pixies

Constantly comparing your wedding to others and focusing on what could have been done better is going to suck the joy and fun out of a day where you’re supposed to be at your happiest and having the time of your life. And the last thing you want to remember about your special day is the regret of not having enough happy memories about the day.

Do this instead:

Instead of feeling down about not being able to live up to the glamourous and extravagant weddings you’ve read about, focus on the big picture and remember what your wedding is all about – a celebration of love and creating memories with your closest loved ones. It does not need to be Pinterest or Instagram worthy, and it does not need to be better or bigger than the next bride’s; all it needs to be is sincere, memorable and reminiscent of who you and your groom are as individuals and as a couple.

5. There is a difference between styled shoots and real weddings

A Summertime Pastel Romance Styled Shoot at The Summerhouse by KAI Picture

In case you don’t already know, styled shoots make up for most of the wedding inspiration you find online or on social media. Meant to give inspiration and ideas on how you can style your wedding, styled shoots are often lavish, elaborate and incredibly beautiful, and its only natural that you’d want your wedding to look exactly like that. But what styled shoots don’t tell you is the cost of replicating the setup. Unless you have the budget to accommodate the styling from a styled shoot, it is best to use them as a source of inspiration for your wedding styling.

Do This Instead:

You don’t need to have all the elements in a styled shoot for your wedding. Instead, select one or two elements from the shoot that you can easily incorporate into your wedding that will give off the same look as the styled shoot. Or, if you’re adamant on replicating most of the styling, look to scale down on the intensity of the décor so you can get the look you want without breaking the bank.


Credits: Feature Image from Caiyun and Terence’s Gorgeous, Romantic Wedding at Montigo Resorts Nongsa by SVK Studio.