"si dian jin (四点金)"

Jas, be thankful your MIL bought it yrs ago...shows that she really value her future DIL, even when she did not even know who is it...;)

My ILs are going to buy so that they dun lose face cos my mum give me alot of jewellery...not bcos they realli wanna give me...but i'm returning their jewellery to them after the wedding, dun want them to say that I'm greedy...
 


Something to share.
Not a nice experience with Taka Jewellery.
My MIL bought me a pari of earring, but i cant wear that kind of design, so i request to change it to another design. For Taka Jewellery exchange policy is 3 days. The very next day, I went back to the shop and told them i wanted to change another design. I saw 1 bigger earring which is on 50% discount. but the guy said, since i m exchanging item, that earring i wanted cant price it at 50% discount. he do some calculation and told me it will be 30% discount and i have to top up 100++ more. i choose another earring which is the same value as my earring, he said must choose something that i have to top up money (then why the reciept stated can be exchange same or higher value). he can even said wait, he consult his manager abt it, which in the end after i left the shop, my FH told me the sales person himself is the manager (what a lousy one). i spent like 1 hr in that small shop just to find somthing i wish i would like. i can only said the workmanship is really obviously bad. in the end i found something and top up 20 bucks. and i got a photocopied receipt.
if you guys have been looking around for jewellery, you can see the difference between taka jewellery and sk or lee hwa or goldheart. i know the price is big difference too. but for my pair of earring is already $350+, which could get me a better one at any other shop at discount price.
And for their so call diamond detector thing. it will go beep at any diamond they press at. When you buying diamond, the main concern is 'is it a good dismond'. you can use the detector thing to press it at those very yellow color 'h' diamond with neddles, feather inside, it still go beep.
So i told my FH to tell his mom 'dont ever buy anything from Taka Jewellery anymore'.

hmmm...
Yes, i m thankful. at least i dont have to go hinting what i prefer for SDJ.
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Yah i also dun really trust their stuff even though its cheaper.

but jas dun think so much abt it.

Hi Jaye

different dialet group prastice differently.
Not sure i posted in here before. Some people based on the husband dialet some based on the wife dialet. for example a teochew husband will only buy the bracelet for hokkien dialet wife.

Some MIL give their DIL their set which they used before. so there is hard rule. SDJ is the PIL buy for the DIL. But for some case, the FH buy instead of the PIL so it depends lor. if your FH buy then no need buy so expensive also cos the money can be use in other area.
 
Hi ladies
Can someone advise me on GDL? I am Hokkien(my mum's teochew) and my FH is Teochew...
what shall I expect my MIL give me? angbao or sidianji ? or both? if MIL never mention anything yet can I ask them? and normally PIL side will decide the no boxes of cakes or we bride side decide?
How long we need for Ti Qing before AD?
 
My FH is teochew.
we keep things simple.
its the bride side that request for no. of box of cakes. you MIL should give you SDJ. normally it should be your family side to request for SDJ. not nice for you to ask your MIL.
We never do the Ti Qing thing. only me and my FH rely the message.
actually it's all depends on how tradition your mom or MIL want it to be.
if going for very tradition, should get Mei Ren to negotiate the things
 
Hmm... I'm a hainanese... and my mom also told me that she wants me to get si dian jin from my FMIL... so i told my FH... and my FMIL agreed... and gave me a budget to work with...

so i think... it's really up to the mothers... coz i read that only for teochews is compulsory...

as for cakes... from what i heard.. is ur mother request de... as in bride's side. =)
 
Watch the "Xuan Hao Jiu Jie Hun" last week, nowadays seems like ppl are moving to favor diamonds... must have deeper pockets to get married.
 
I have check out those bridal jewellery set at goldheart. best when they have discount. 1 set will cost around $4k (hope i didnt price wrong). just almost the same price as gold (presume thick gold chain etc.)
 
Wow, I'm interested to know too... gosh, did i hear clearly...$4k for a set?? Can I exchange for honeymoon!!! hehhe....
 
Hi All,

I'm going for a teochew customary.. Heard that need to get "long feng bracelet" is it??

How i wish we can do away with the ti-qin thingy.. but my mom insist it's a must.

Then my FH was suggesting not to get SDJ from his parents, he said it's a waste of money.. but personally I feel i should still ask for it..

Honeymoon.. sob sob.. my FH wants to bring along his parents and friends with us... Sigh..
 
omg... why???? honeymoon is supposed to be for the two of you only. why bring his parents and friends along too????

why not tell him since he misses his parents and friends so much, he can go on a honeymoon with them and you can round up some of your gfs and go someplace exotic without him. hehehehe... :P i'm being mean. :P
 
Hi, jus wana know wat is the average price of SDJ coz' my MIL asks me to choose and i don;t want to be seen as a greedy DIL.
 
hi lazybride,

u can ask your hubby to sound her out on whats an ok budget. then from there, cut till 2/3 of her budget...

if you are very very easy going on the SDJ, u may just get say, a diamond necklace or a bracelet, or something that you really wish to own but no chance to get....

if all parties are modern, u can even get a nice watch.....

IMO, maybe 1k is decent....
 
hello, anyone just take the ang pow of si dian jin, and didn't use it to buy any jewellery? instead use it for wedding expenses? I was wondering if it is appropriate to do this.
 
hi xynn,

not too nice if your MIL asks.. and part of the purpose is that your mil will wear it on you during the tea ceremony..
 
ic. thanks ladies. my MIL said she want to keep the ang pows from relatives from banquet. Is this the norm?
 
hi xynn,

she keep the ang pows from relatives?? so weird. its normally for GIRLs side when they request how many tables they want. funny leh...
 
Hi Minssy, yar. i find it vv weird also. she says she wants to keep the ang pows from relatives. If tat's the case, she shd have say so before we started hunting for banquet venues. Then i would have gone for a cheaper option in a restaurant.....i feel like have being stressed over banquet matters now...
 
hi xynn,

looks like u gotta get your FH to speak to her. the deal is: all cost of banquet is foot by you all. if she takes ALL the ang baos of her relos side, the burden will be heavier on you guys.

UNLESS she gives a very very big amt of dowry that can almost cover the x number of tables else u sure will lugi big time!
 
yah, this is weird, why is she taking the money? oh no, better solve this the soonest or u have to cough out alot of money to settle the banquet...
 
hi all,

FYI..

my future MIL gave me $2K budget to buy my si dian jin..
and we have a fren in this jewellery biz.
i managed to make a diamond pendant & diamond tennis bracelet (57 diamonds at 0.045 each)for S$3K.

My bf topped up S$1K cos his fren said S$2K is difficult to make a nice tennis bracelet.
 
my budget is $2.5K..and im going to my bro's friend workplace-soo kee to buy coz of the discount he can give us
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It's so difficult to know what to choose when going with MIL to buy SDJ. I'm concerned that if I choose too "cheap" she might think I don't give "face", but if choose "exp" she might think I want to "chop" her. Hai~ Any advise??
 
hi violetice,

think best to try to ask her the budget.
i think $2K is the norm..but if ur MIL is well off, maybe u can up the budget a bit.. better to ask first to avoid misunderstanding. then with the budget u can shortlist the items first before u bring her there ..
 
snowbaby, your 3k is just for the tennis bracelet or inclusive of the pendant? the tennis bracelet, tiffany design, my mum got me is 49 diamonds, each is 0.07 (ie, 7 pointers), E colour, VVS clarity & cost $3.2k. picture attached below. she also gave me a diamond ring. FMIL did not ask me to choose. instead, she chose it herself. is a solitarie pendant & a pair of solitarie earrings... both my mum & FMIL went to the same jeweller.. and i think total damage is at least 10k....

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hi diamond.
ur bracelet is very nice. i like the flower..
my 3K includes the pendant. which shop did ur mum go ? very nice. i think with that size.$3.2 is a good price. now u hv a good set of diamonds!
 
hey gals,
I'm wondering, for SDJ, is it ok to get 2 items instead of 4? Coz FMIL gave her other DIL necklace and bracelet only. But if she gives me 4 items, like not so nice leh...
 
oh, another question:-
do they talk about the SDJ when both sets of parents meet? Coz my FMIL is asking me to go buy jewellery already (now got GSS, I guess)...but both sides of parents have not met yet to talk abt the dowry etc...
 
hi csi fan,

its totally ok to get 2 pieces or even 1 simple piece.. in your case, you may wanna get the item(s) based on the value of SDJ that your FMIL gave to the other DIL....

normally when both sides' parents meet, they need not talk abt the SDJ issue.. its more of the dowry amt & tables request... think u guys can go ahead and buy, shd your FMIL prefers to do so.. but of cos, try to get your FH to sound out on an estimated amt lah
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hey minssy,

yah...guess so lorh. We did find out an estimated budget (esp since now gold prices so high), but it's still...like quite little leh...(haha. ok, me greedy) hahaha...oh well...what to do?

But found out one thing though, my parents want to meet up to talk abt GDL stuff and SDJ. They were like "haven't meet up yet want to buy jewellery."...er...ok. haha...at least I know how to progress lah.
 
hi csi fan,

wah dun be greedy lah
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u like that one meh? ;)

there is no hard & fast rules.. your timing is fine....
 
hi Minssy,

heehee...no lah...not greedy lah...just that when u hear that all the cousins & frens got 4 items of $X...suddenly 2 items of $Y feel like little lorh. hahaha. Ok, ok...I'll just take what she gives. Better than nothing lah.
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hi csi fan,

hahaha. i know what u mean..i also only have 1 diamond item.... u must 'help to save you fmil save money'.. then she will sayang you more :p
 

Hi girls,

Just to check, usually for si dian jin, is it better to ask for white or yellow gold? For me, yellow gold, FMIL will buy it on her own and if white gold, i have to go along and choose. However, I do not know her budget or how much she is willing to spend ( not too nice to ask her hehe ).. Choose too ex, later she not happy.. Any advices?
 

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