Hi gals
Something for your gals to read again. Enjoy!!!
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS
A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested,
"I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU
officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh,
Good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and
dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure
hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need
companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer
listened carefully and replied, "I understand You need television."
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind
wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the
husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many
couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual
perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off,
they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare
begins.
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NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful
marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?" The father-in-law
answered in a smile, "Never criticise your wife for her
shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that
because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better
husband than you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of
losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around
to find a scapegoat to point the finger at.
This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point
one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves. If
we forgive others, others will ignore our mistake too.
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NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or
demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all
and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.
Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries
the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a
person's character." It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation
on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and
unpleasantness. It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our
expectations.
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RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will
either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of
wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, we always forget
mutual respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it
would hurt the other party.
A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A
worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We
used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire
husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife
of a construction worker." She answered, "You should appreciate that you
married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you."
Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad
relationship.
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TRUST
Trust is a very important factor for all relationships. When trust is
broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads to
suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and enmity may
result in separation. A telephone operator told me that one day she
received a phone call. She answered, "Public Utilities Board." There was
silence. She repeated, "PUB." There was still no answer.
When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so
this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my husband's pocket but I do not
know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will
happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just "hello"
instead of"PUB".
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PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different people have different perception. One man's meat could be
another man's poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way
home, a boy commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the
donkey?" Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He
walked besides them.
Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The husband is the head of family.
How can the wife ride on the donkey while the husband is on foot?"
Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the husband ride on the
donkey. Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How
can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman."
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey.
Then, they met a young man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold
up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you."
Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the
donkey and carried it on their shoulders. It seems to be the only choice
left.
Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They
lost their balance and fell into the river.
"You can never have everyone praise you nor will everyone condemn you.
Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future. Thus,
do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear."
