Issues to be resolved before marriage?

[roomfulofstars]

I think either I or someone else posted this before but I can't seem to locate the thread anymore. Anyhow, I have a question:

What do you guys think are the issues that need to be resolved before marriage?

It may seem like such an obvious question/ answer, but I believe people may have different answers or experiences that have worked for their respective relationships.

 

[mark78]

Money issues?

 

[trouble_ladyeee]

Parent in-laws?

 

[sgbabydoll]

Whether or not there would be children?

Household chores?

Housing?

 

[vios]

Before a couple hears the many different issues owing to different experiences...
why not first Think about the Reason for this marriage and Explore it deeper?

 

[miloice]

The commitment and communication channel to work on differences. There is no way you can iron out or prepare yourselves for everything.

What you really need is the key factors to facilitate and encourage healthy communication to work on the differences as they come. You need to consistently align your goals together. Only then, will u be able to identify and work on issues positively.

 

[texasholdem]

go for MPC

 

[skylar]

wahh..like really A LOT of issues hor?
hahahahahah...
but still it is good to have all these resolved before marriage.

 

[tomasulu]

only one issue, and as brutally honest as possible - is he or she right for me?

 

[miloice]

tomasulu,

the prob is during honeymoon, everything is perfect. Nothing seems to be blocking and for sure most couples think that's the one. But when situation changes, they soon realize the reality of it all.

 

[simpleman]

Milo as put it right.. the commitment to work on the differences is very important.. but major issue like

a) money
b) in-laws and living arrangement
c) views on children
d) religion - at least must tolerate differences
e) sexual compatibility

I am already assuming that couples love one another and is right for one another.

 

[tomasulu]

i agree. the thing is, there will always be one issue or another for a couple to deal with. and what's agreed and decided upon today may not seem like such a good idea tomorrow. instead of focusing on one particular issue, i'd consider carefully whether the person i'm to marry is right for me.

 

[tomasulu]

the lack of sleep is finally catching up on me. reading my previous posts make little sense to me now. issues and person, aren't they six and half a dozen?

ok never mind me, please carry on with the discussion.

 

[anan]

hi all, althou i'm only getting married end of this yr, but feel tat it's impt to discuss some deep issues for financial.

For my situation, my HTB is having a 20% pay cut suddenly, as co not doing v well. job loss is highly possible as his co is on the verge of closing down. of cos, he's trying his best to look for a job now and try to also do some part time.

I'm now trying my best to support him mentally and trying to figure out how i can support him financially. so this is one deep issue that i would encourage couples to discuss it thru so that they're not caught unaware if such situation arises suddenly.

 

[leuand]

I completely agree with Who?Me? as there are lot of issues in a family which ones decided will creep up again after a while.
The issue of savings come up every now and then in my married life and we argue a lot. Every time we decide not to discuss regarding it next time, but it keeps coming back.
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