Having a crush on bf's good friend

u see ah, u say u only give one chance. Then u say u gave the old woman many chances. Don't make sense.

Why u keep talking about the old woman when u had like...a few dozens more? When I ask about the 'one chance', of coz I dun mean that old woman...isn't she the reason u set up your own rule...or are u trying to say now that u don't have this rule and I anyhow say one?
 


scope: so u know yellow's bfren lah? Can u describe him to me? We don't even KNOW who he is and u tell me she is in self denial. In fact, we dun even know who yellow is. Do we know their love story? Do we knoe what they have gone through? I think we know more about u than about her, so why u say it is self denial?
 
Hweebs,

You are throwing back the questions at me. LOL~

That's because I am using this story to help you bang the walls and get my copi from you. LOL~

Look, Hweebs... I'm trying to make you, a woman, understand something. I am trying to lead you somewhere *really* professional. So far I was reading all those junks out there on various cases, entertaining... but saddening.

Relationship... LOL~ I guess God has a reason to remove wisdom from women. If women are too wise, and they realise they do have the One each... they will never have sex so easily with any others to reproduce... and we'd have all babes and hunks when women insist on genetically powerful men.

Hweebs, you are a counsellor with experience... So, don't keep me waiting. I am very interested to know what you think... ^.^
 
Hweebs,

I don't need to know Yellow's BF nor Yellow herself. If she is honestly expressing herself and her story here, that's all I need.

She is obviously in self-denial. Her psychological readings give her away... LOL~

If you don't trust me... just let her tell you more. As I have said, Hweebs... You are getting too engrossed with facts which you do not need or you can't digest.

Women...
 
scope, please dun think u are so superior that it is your job to 'lead' me to think and to learn. Thanks, but no thanks. This is not getting anywhere, because u think you are always right and u feel you are always right, and everybody else in the world is wrong. So whatever i say will be moot, because it will just be something for u to shoot down. Ok fine, u win, u are right, u happy now? While you revel in your glory of winning, understand that u are winning at the expense of your relationships: u win your arguments, but u lose your frens, because no one except masochists want to be near someone as obnoxiously right as you. Enjoy your lonely days ahead.
 
oh, and lastly scope, go and do the BDI, or go and see a counsellor or something. Not judging to say u have problems or not, but to be on the safe side...i sense depression
 
when it comes to love, relationship and all that stuffs - happiness or sadness - i find that it's a denial-form in one's "convenient truth" when factoring in "Heaven's arrangement" as the main driving force.

"destined one" or not - seriously, there is no guarantee on 'ever-lasting' or 'happily ever after" - even if the couple has found "true love" in each other. sounds too much like a fairy tale to me with all that "arrangement made by Heaven" and "the one", even if we're talking about mutual love and appreciation.

circumstances change, people might change as well... in bgr and marriage, it's huge to never freaking take each other as well as Time for granted.

gotta deal with the harsh reality IF it comes your way. i say, do your utmost freaking best if you decide to fight for your love but do rem that you cannot fight a losing battle forever, or be blinded with certain glaring facts....

don't beat yourself up with some "Wtf? Now then i know, he or she is actually Not The One" theory... but importantly, learn from the experience to be a better person as a whole. it's not Heaven that decides your life, it's only yourself.

just find that it doesn't enrich myself as a person - eg. if I take a break from "Supposingly The One" to "Another One whom i find it's the Real One now"... all in all, could be a real cycle of denial based on "the destined One arranged by Heaven".
 
hweebs, finally coming to terms with the truth ?
happy.gif
 
"I guess God has a reason to remove wisdom from women. If women are too wise, and they realise they do have the One each... they will never have sex so easily with any others to reproduce... and we'd have all babes and hunks when women insist on genetically powerful men."


then again, this part is too generalising, needlessly. don't think it applies to all women even though some might have unfortunately made a poor judgement in their choice.

good thing is that some learnt from experience, but of course some just don't....

still, it's rather unwise to judge the level of wisdom based on the fact that they are women, and prob will make mistakes just like men... moreover, the negative connotation is totally unfounded.
 
well hweebs, one could call it being in a different league or level. It doesn't matter how some others would see it. But after all the long talks, the outcome is pretty much the same isn't it? Wasting all your time and effort to realize something pretty obvious all the long
happy.gif
 
junkie, u wrote :
"rite no one is perfect. but the closer he is to (ur) ideal, the greater ur chances of happiness & success."

This is with the assumption that the individual is stable enough to really knows what she needs and wants in life. Else, he/she will be chasing fantasies and dream wishlists only to be disappointed. We will be shaken and tempted, that's human. But, one needs to be clear in what they really need. Then, its clear if she should go for the crush or not.
 
Hweebs,

I am not here to make friends. Making people happy is YOUR job not mine. You and Milo keep on asserting things which are not true, and you are jumping conclusions on loose stories.

I NEVER forced you or Milo to do so. So get it straight. This is my story, and you have read it, you should think through. If you still cannot reach the basis, you can say I try to win...

But... make sense, what is there to win? I am leading you only because you have been making all the wrong turns. And just because you are wrong and I am pointing out doesn't mean I am superior.

It's the same of what I did with Denise80. Am I hence superior than her or she is more superior than me?

Can't you just realise, you never asked the right questions? And the answers to your questions have been all in that long story... You are asking me to repeat again and again, and accuse me of hurting you... when I don't even need to pamper anyone here.

I don't usually meet online 'friends' offline; so ask yourself... why are you bringing in:
While you revel in your glory of winning, understand that u are winning at the expense of your relationships: u win your arguments, but u lose your frens, because no one except masochists want to be near someone as obnoxiously right as you

BTW... I know what is depression. I am currently recovering from a very serious 'heart attack'. But it's ok. You are right, I am lonely now. It happened 15years ago... but this time is tougher. But once I am more or less ok, I'd find my company soon. ^.^

Finding women is easy... The tough part is finding love... ...
 
Vios,

Using this forum for instance...

Telling me this is what and what is not the issue. To prove me wrong, women here have to show me at least some brains. If Denise80 can, why not the rest who are telling me they are so smart...

Whether women are smart is how they show it, not how they nag about how smart they are. And when you are smart, I'd BLUNTLY tell you, accuse you and label you as smart.

I am a very straight forward guy, if you are crazy, I'd just bluntly tell you you are crazy. It's not really over-generalisation... In terms of relationship... most women are 'idiots'. But this the only way God can make women be fvcked by genetically louya men to produce rich assholes or academic retards, and ugly children... who in their time may not be so rich or fortunate.

And of course, if women are not idiots, all of them will be searching for the One. And many will know the power of love. And lawyers and PIs will be largely out of jobs. LOL~
 
milo, not all problems can be fixed and we need to accept the fact that some relationships r just not meant to be. and yellow’s relationship with her bf is not exactly fulfilling. she finds another man attractive and he seems interested in her too. now then, why not give it a shot?

going for the crush might not be a bad thing for her. at least it will help her get out of a so-so relationship... we learn as we go
happy.gif


anyway, she opts to stay...

cos she isn’t the sort to “cheat†and “stealâ€
happy.gif
 
That answer only yellow will know. For sure the options are there. Its not the final decision that matters by how she arrived at them. No one is fixing her. We cannot be dating Every single person that we have mutual attraction to. Its part of our instincts.
 
scope,

bound to get people to differ from our opinions lah... or get misinterpreted. some requires a few leads whereas some needs total spoonfeed. it's nothing new as long as i think that we don't write them off too quickly as seen in this forum, some are really clueless abt their situation....

like how you described women as 'idiots' in relationship which i still think it is totally baseless because certain situations come with certain factors... moreover in life, all of us had been 'idiots' in one way or another, hadn't we?

contrary to what you just claimed with the doings of God, the real unfortunate group of children is to have people looking at them with biaseness just because they are not books-smart and/or physically unattractive - when they could be well capable in other areas.
 
scope: of coz i know u know what is depression laR *roll eyes* I just caution u to go see the DSM or use the BDI, that's all.

I agree with milo. Actually it's not just attraction bah...it's urges. If we give in and entertain all the urges that we have, wouldn't it be a really chaotic world? I'll just smash the display windows to get the diamonds I want, open anything to eat/drink in the supermarket, kiss anyone i see on the street, punch whoever who has a nosering(if i happen to detest noserings), kill as i wish
 
Vios,

I know what you are trying to say. I am just conveniently using Darwin to p0ke fun with social norms. LOL~

But if you seriously get a good look at women's relationship thinking, especially in Singapore... LOL~ Let's go one corner, and proclaim that they are 'i*****'.

God? God is my good friend.

Baseless or not, I'm always looking out for the exceptions. Why not?

Hweebs,

I suppose someone like myself who sleeps whole day, happily swims and chats with people... won't likely to be in depression. Not to say, my appetite is pretty good.

So you are probably joking, or jesting. Medically speaking, depression comes with at least some insomia and poor taste for food, and bla bla bla... I was chatting yesterday happily with a girl... LOL~

Heart-attack doesn't equate depression.

What would be hence obvious to you and Milo? LOL~ Do you really know why this world is so chaotic?

That's because people don't ever reason before they jump around. And why am I not surprised women jumped into marriages without even least going through the brains. And then... all it takes will be a small little kick... and that's how PIs and Lawyers are smiling to the banks.

If this is the order of life... I'd rather choose chaos. Which is, I rather you people, everyone of you, disagree with me. LOL~

If you know who I am... I am just that sort of super big bo-chap.

Look, Hweebs... You only live once as Hweebs. If you want to cheat your heart, if you want to live a zombie, nobody can stop you. But... if you want to tell others to cheat their hearts and live a zombie...

Make sure when they wake up, or when they make huge losses, you'd be ready to answer for it. Now Sadtz have declared divorce... she's seeking support for her children... I am still waiting for the entire forum who told her this and that to entertain her.

I am sad for her...

Now, where are all those smartalecs?

She cheated herself when she chose to marry; and went on cheating herself that she'd forgive and went on with her misery; she cheated herself and have those children... and she cheated herself yet again with divorce hanging those three children and burning her family she what wasted so much life to build.

Hweebs, your job is to make people happy... My job... is to get the truth. LOL~ I'd pull them by the hairs if need be to the mirror for a good look of themselves.

Chaos... Am I really the devil? LOL~ Well... ...

You can agree with anyone. But what is what will still be the same. If I love someone, why not kiss her? If I love you, if you let me, I'd kiss you... If 1000 women love me, I'm not going to favor 1 and let down 999 women, and let them choose a skunk each and live into miseries.

Don't you understand?

You cannot choose who God sends you. You must love to be in heaven. There is no real order aside from that artifically created by mortals. You cannot cheat your heart... doing that you choose hell as you favor mortal rules over God's.

Look at Jack Neo... Counsellors will tell Irene to stick with him... that's proper. And... what's the chance of Jack fvcking around again? Or rather, what is the chance of Jack REALLY in love with Irene? But people will tell women to be faithful to marriages... till their men go to Geyland and bring home the mistresses.

I threw this thing to Piggylover, I throw that to you as well:
As a woman in a relationship, can you decide for your partner?

Don't cheat your heart.
 
scope: not depressed ah, good lor
happy.gif
i am not u mah, so how i know...i pick up some signs and i give warning only mah. U see, I suggest, and give you the benefit of the doubt: because I don't know you. Or would you rather that I try to pull my weight and point out every small little thing that indicates that u are depressed? It is not what you are saying that is wrong, it is the certainty that you are DEFINITELY right that puts me off.

People that get into marriages without thinking? Sure it gets to me too! People who married for reasons other than love/true love? Yup, I feel that it is inappropriate! The point I am against is giving up too easily, and having more than one relationship at a time. If the person finds the current one unsuitable after trying and honouring the commitment, then by all means end if it is his/her choice. The main part is CHOICE. A person who makes his/her own choices is responsible for them. A person who listens to other pple's directives and follow them does not feel responsible for anything that can/will happen. I am especially irked that you don't allow people to choose. They must choose your way!!!

"As a woman in a relationship, can you decide for your partner?" Of coz cannot, but I can decide for myself whether I am living according to my values.

AND don't spout rubbish about counsellors telling Irene to stick to him. Counsellors help to show options, help to process emotions BUT NEVER EVER MAKE ANY DECISIONS FOR ANYBODY. Maybe that is what you will do, but u are definitely NOT a counsellor.
 
scope: I'm curious

"If 1000 women love me, I'm not going to favor 1 and let down 999 women, and let them choose a skunk each and live into miseries"

If 1000 women love you, and one is your so called 'true love', and you decide not to let down the 999 women, but your 'true love' sees your actions as being unfaithful and want to call it quits. Then what?
 
Hweebs,

LOL~

Never mind.

Anyway, regarding that little quiz... None of you are doing well. LOL~

Here's making it simpler.

If you have 1,000 children and you have only 1 piece of meat, which is your choice of any 1 will kill 999 of them via starvation. LOL~

So what's the moral of the whole quiz?

It's actually a simple test... LOL~

I decide to throw that out so that before some smarties come talking nosense again, just get their basis on relationship correct first. And do not tell me love for your children is not same as love for a man or woman... or what favoritism or step-mother-ism.

If you know how to see things, that quiz will be pretty easy. It actually has an answer. LOL~

If counsellors must give options, shouldn't they at least know what they are talking about?

Yes. You are living according to your values... so stick to yourself because if you are going into a relationship, and you take it like a game and try to 'control' it with all sorts of rules via your values... Just prepare to lose. ^.^ And tell that to Autumn Time and Piggylover.

Easy quiz... but once I rephase it, you'd all show me your true worth. LOL~ Hopefully, my dear Denise80 can try that.

One last thing, a repeat... There is no such thing as a game. Which means, when you found your real love, don't expect to play a game of finishing (which can drag for forever)... If that is your woman, and you try to finish a game and then find her... I think I said something in Half-hearted's case... or who... ... ...

Whose case was that?

You can take this as a game, wait for it to nicely finish... then you end up finding that the woman or man has started her or his own game elsewhere... ... LOL~

Relationship is no games, Hweebs.

Love is an honor. But only when you base your relationship on Love. Just as well, how many of those women base their relationships on love? LOL~

I read your take on the quiz... The lives of many Juliets are in your hands... LOL~ 1 Juliet chosen to kill them all... or... what? Try apply your... *values*.

If you cannot save the Juliets, how you save anyone?

Naughty naughty naugthy... Scope is so naughty.

Btw, when has God told mortals He'd bless anyone with only ONE true love??? (Roars in laughter~)
 
"Btw, when has God told mortals He'd bless anyone with only ONE true love???" True he didn't say that. Yes one may have more than one true love. But not at the same time. If for instance I am that "true love", having to read what you have wrote, I would have strike you off even before I see you :P So much for true love at work...I deserve better: someone who is willing to give up the whole forest for me. If not, being single is good enough for me
 
Hweebs,

If I were to be your true love, that's where women always go wrong. But... there is also a safety measure... whatever.

I met one woman who asked a very classic thing:
I just don't understand you guys, why do you have me and you still want more...

The issue about women is this... They do not know Man, yet they assume too much about Man. And they even have their own... prefered 'strategies' and best scenarios for choosing men based on such crap thinking.

Just like you. If I were to be your true love, striking me off for me is not my problem, you mature is the issue. Because... before you understand Man and know how to gauge, even if I have NO one else, you'd never know how to handle a relationship. Because you do not really know what you want. Therefore every option you give yourself is wrong.

After all, I am your true love. And you strike me off.

What better do you actually deserve? I told you many times, Hweebs... Relationship is not a game, do not over-ride God's rules with your mortal ones.

You have too many instances, but God only sends me. For whatever excuses you have for yourself... if I were to be your true love, I am.

Look at Peas... Is her husband the One only because he is like seeing only Peas? Is Peas is the One for her husband because she is like seeing many others? LOL~

Think about it, Hweebs.

Given your rules, you are the one playing double standards... at least in Pea's case.

Many women are like that... I know. That's why I am not after the 'many women'. You told Pea yourself... she may have loved her husband. You were right, but you do not understand why you were right. Women are like this.

More than one or not is not the issue, my dear Hweebs. Who you truly belong to is... Don't be your own Goddess. LOL~
 
My life
My game
My rules

Don't like it? Get out. It's that simple. Love? It's just a condiment of my life. If it makes it happier and better, good. If not, I've got better things to do.

Pea is not me, I can't be responsible for her life. She decides how to live, for herself only.
 
Ehh...let me correct myself: I have enough love and is giving enough love in my life to need to depend on 'true love'. If I manage to find it and it will add value to my life, great. Otherwise, no big deal.
 
Hweebs,

Right. So you have to be careful in dealing with relationship of others'. Because it's NOT only about you.

And... well, when you do meet that someone... you'd bend your rules, you'd want your life to be his, and there won't be any game... because there will be only one issue: Him.

It's obviously, you haven't met that someone who will have that impact on your life.

When has there ever been enough love? LOL~

It seems that... you are... ... suppressing yourself in a way. I forget the exact terminlogy for this state of mindset.

All I wish for you is to meet that someone whom you'd do anything for him... who is worth even your life. Don't give up on yourself, Hweebs... Seek him out.

Love... motherly love, love of a lifetime, and the love for the world... ... They are all the same when you cannot cheat your heart, but yourself. Hmm... ...

Women.
 
if i meet that person and then my whole life will be only about him: pathetic.

"When has there ever been enough love? LOL~"

sounds like you never had enough ever. So sad
 
Hweebs,

Before I go for my entertainment...
Set your heart beating... That's life.

I am a super romance freak, Hweebs.

"Love is what makes us immortals..."

If I love you, I'd love you forever... ... and ever. But you must worth it. LOL~ Nothing to be sad about.

Till old and beyond death, my love goes on.

Love is probably the reason... why I still look so young... ... My women used to call me 'God Of Love'. LOL~ Because every day, I want to kiss you morning, noon and night. I want you in my arms as you giggle and call me a pig.

I'd never have enough love, Hweebs. I want to look into her eyes, and I want to see her eyes tell me every night she loves me so much...

Well... ...

If you are blessed, you'd be 'pathetic' one day. Trust me. The power of love is so wonderful...
 
ah boy, 算了 *pat head*, you wouldn't understand. There is only love in your existence, there is no other purpose in your life.
 
hweebs, actually, many celebrities are in this situation. Only much more than a thousand.

Millions of fans worldwide love them and willing to do anything to be with them.

How to handle? The elements needed to make a relationship doesn't change at all. No one needs to please the world. So what, they love you and cannot wait to get a piece of you. You handle the relationship the same. Funnie on why one would feel they need to make a decision in the thousand.
 
Hweebs,

Watch Letters To Juliet.

I don't think you'd ever understand what I am talking about. You called me Ah Boy... but I honestly find you very immature.

What advice would you have given the old lady if you were Juliet? Why did the old lady still search for the old man despite that he could be married? Why knowing the girl is engaged, the guy still gave chase?

What is the moral of this story?

Hweebs... You said you were sad for me... But I am the one who is truly sad for you, and so many idiotic local women who still believe that marriage is a decision... ... OMG~ And love is a myth.

And those are the 'happy' and 'mature' women who can delude themselves for all they want because... I won't want them, they won't need me. LOL~

And... you are shooting off anyohow again. I love my women.

Perhaps this movie... is not suitable for you.

But just watch it, perhaps a miracle for you will happen. And it'd change your life.

Silly women...
 
milo: Hmm...many of the celebrities who went into the 'high' of being loved so much usually go into alcohol, drugs and sex because they thought all these could bring them happiness. Then they crash. Why need to please a thousand...because they forget that life is not about pleasing people! :P
 
Hweebs,

Till you meet that one who'd make you 'pathetic', what can I say? LOL~

Just go and watch Letters To Juliet, and tell me... if I feel happy for the old and young women, should I be happy for you? (Roars in laughter)

Don't cheat your heart, little women.
 
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