(2011/10) Oct 2011 BTB
- Thread starter altiora
- Start date
Min: I didn't know it was a super super hot date. We just somehow settled on that date. 
My mom just SMSed: Wah you so poor thing. Your mom-in-law never gives us any money so too bad, I can't buy you any jewellery ah. Not my fault.
Ophidi: Cloudy is also another 30 Oct bride
My mom just SMSed: Wah you so poor thing. Your mom-in-law never gives us any money so too bad, I can't buy you any jewellery ah. Not my fault.
Ophidi: Cloudy is also another 30 Oct bride
|||Hey Joy,
Honestly speaking, I will not give her a single cent. It takes a lot for a mother to treat a daughter this manner, more over she is the one who give birth to u. whatever she did is causing yin ying to the child when she grows up. I never pity on someone who is heartless to illtreat their children. Its their responsible to take care, pay for whatever it may come when they decided to have a kids. Joy, I feel sad for you and i seriously think that you can just ignore whatever non sense she is causing for your wedding.
Just remember, end of the day is your husband that is gonna hold your hands n walk down the rough patch with u, not your parents. For the parents our there, if you cant affort to have kids, dun make your kids suffer in the moment of your own foolishness, Shame on you parents!
Joy: Get on with your life, your life will not make any diff with or without this ppl in your life
Honestly speaking, I will not give her a single cent. It takes a lot for a mother to treat a daughter this manner, more over she is the one who give birth to u. whatever she did is causing yin ying to the child when she grows up. I never pity on someone who is heartless to illtreat their children. Its their responsible to take care, pay for whatever it may come when they decided to have a kids. Joy, I feel sad for you and i seriously think that you can just ignore whatever non sense she is causing for your wedding.
Just remember, end of the day is your husband that is gonna hold your hands n walk down the rough patch with u, not your parents. For the parents our there, if you cant affort to have kids, dun make your kids suffer in the moment of your own foolishness, Shame on you parents!
Joy: Get on with your life, your life will not make any diff with or without this ppl in your life
i agree with amelia mostly, some people are better out of your life because they don't do any good in it.
however, parents are still parents. you know better whether they made sacrifices for you growing up, so i hope you make the decision that you will feel most at peace with
however, parents are still parents. you know better whether they made sacrifices for you growing up, so i hope you make the decision that you will feel most at peace with
ophidi: i'm getting hitched on oct 30th too!
Joy: whether or not she really loves you, no need to harp on it liao~ the point is, if you wan her blessings, then have to do it her way~ if not, can u bear the consequences in future?
i see it this way, if u are super unhappy about it, voice it out to her~ tell her that either
1) i give u 5k and u get the hell out of my life
or
2) sit down and negotiate... tell her that u wish for ur wedding to be a happy event and she is affecting your decisions~ tell her what you are unhappy about and talk it out..... no shouting and screaming~ just make it a factual thing~~
it could be becoz she is brought up this way and she feels that there's nothing wrong by doing all this since she was treated in the same way too. after all, she has been providing a shelter for you since you are born~
Joy: whether or not she really loves you, no need to harp on it liao~ the point is, if you wan her blessings, then have to do it her way~ if not, can u bear the consequences in future?
i see it this way, if u are super unhappy about it, voice it out to her~ tell her that either
1) i give u 5k and u get the hell out of my life
or
2) sit down and negotiate... tell her that u wish for ur wedding to be a happy event and she is affecting your decisions~ tell her what you are unhappy about and talk it out..... no shouting and screaming~ just make it a factual thing~~
it could be becoz she is brought up this way and she feels that there's nothing wrong by doing all this since she was treated in the same way too. after all, she has been providing a shelter for you since you are born~
My wedding is at River View Hotel, near Grand Corpthorne Waterfront~
ophidi: no leh~ when we knew about it, hubz still say we can do a masquerade theme or a witches and wizards theme~~ |||
Joy: well~ to me it's a once and for all thing loh~ u dun wan her to still haunt you for money or other things after this incident....
ophidi: no leh~ when we knew about it, hubz still say we can do a masquerade theme or a witches and wizards theme~~ |||
Joy: well~ to me it's a once and for all thing loh~ u dun wan her to still haunt you for money or other things after this incident....
pocarisweat
New Member
Ophidi: Then y did u choose this date? Not based on geomancer calculation? Mine is also 30th oct as our geomancer told us it is a good date .. not worried abt Halloween … I can hv a masquerade ball! Hahaha …. U can update the oct btb spreadsheet re. ur details ..
Joy: ur mum give birth to u so also hv to take care of u when u r young wat .. maybe she wants u to be independent .. at the end of the day, she is still ur mum … family will always be there .. u can say u got hubby from now onwards, but if *choy* anything happens, u can still go back to ur own family home. .. nobody can predict the future. . no point ‘tear face’ becoz of 5k .. u said ur dad dotes on u n u r willing to give to ur dad .. but wonder how come now he is also unhappy with u … *scratch head*
Anyway, at the end of the day, u will also inherit ur mum’s money … ur nick is 'joy' so u shld be joyful and excited abt ur wedding day rather than b so unhappy~
Joy: ur mum give birth to u so also hv to take care of u when u r young wat .. maybe she wants u to be independent .. at the end of the day, she is still ur mum … family will always be there .. u can say u got hubby from now onwards, but if *choy* anything happens, u can still go back to ur own family home. .. nobody can predict the future. . no point ‘tear face’ becoz of 5k .. u said ur dad dotes on u n u r willing to give to ur dad .. but wonder how come now he is also unhappy with u … *scratch head*
Anyway, at the end of the day, u will also inherit ur mum’s money … ur nick is 'joy' so u shld be joyful and excited abt ur wedding day rather than b so unhappy~
thank you queenie and vivi, i feel much better about the date now =D
we don't have much of a choice! this is one of the two weekend dates the hotels have left for oct and nov hahaha. anyway, i did read somewhere that 30 oct is a good date too, so yay!
i will update the list when my AD is confirmed stamp chop, still want to check out two more hotels next week =)
we don't have much of a choice! this is one of the two weekend dates the hotels have left for oct and nov hahaha. anyway, i did read somewhere that 30 oct is a good date too, so yay!
i will update the list when my AD is confirmed stamp chop, still want to check out two more hotels next week =)
SIGH VIV, your post will make me spill more in my reply below.
To clarify, my dad is frustrated because he is traditional and wants them to TI QING. He doesnt require the money. My mom does. Both frustruated because of different things.
NOW ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?
No choice have to tell you all dirty laundry while replying Viv:
- Mom already went to lawyer to state to leave me $1 nominal fee in her will
So Viv, I'm not inheriting anything, neither will I want to. I don't wanna touch her money. I learnt that since young.
- Mom also said this: No money from your mom-in-law? Fine. Next time you accident or divorce, ask her to take care of you. I won't care for you since no money.
I KNOW, THE TRUTH JUST GETS WORSE AND WORSE.
To clarify, my dad is frustrated because he is traditional and wants them to TI QING. He doesnt require the money. My mom does. Both frustruated because of different things.
NOW ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?
No choice have to tell you all dirty laundry while replying Viv:
- Mom already went to lawyer to state to leave me $1 nominal fee in her will
So Viv, I'm not inheriting anything, neither will I want to. I don't wanna touch her money. I learnt that since young.
- Mom also said this: No money from your mom-in-law? Fine. Next time you accident or divorce, ask her to take care of you. I won't care for you since no money.
I KNOW, THE TRUTH JUST GETS WORSE AND WORSE.
Hi Joy, sad to hear abt ur story. Agree with Queen & Vivi..no matter what she is still ur mum. I can't say our story are similar but my mum used to be quite terrible & hateful too, not understanding, money face & gambled all her $$ away
but ever since she was sick, her personality totally changed. Sometimes i felt sorry & sad for her, and even wish she can go bk to how she was previously. No matter what, she is still my mum & i know she love her children & family. If my mum is nt sick nw, guess she may behave like ur mum too. Luckily i've a very understanding & great daddy, therefore there are no hipcups for my planning.
If she didn do her duty as a mother, at least u can try ur best to do wat u can for her as a daughter. Wedding shld a happy event...dun be upset ok
Ladies, i'll be going for my PS tmr...but both me & my hubby are falling sick...sob, hope everything will be fine & smooth...
If she didn do her duty as a mother, at least u can try ur best to do wat u can for her as a daughter. Wedding shld a happy event...dun be upset ok
Ladies, i'll be going for my PS tmr...but both me & my hubby are falling sick...sob, hope everything will be fine & smooth...
MC: Fiance and I don't intend to have children. Even if we do, nobody to take care of the children except for a maid. Mom in law not interested to take care. My mom herself said she will not take care ok - made me promise her that I wont make her take care.
Enjoy the photoshoot, all will be well
Enjoy the photoshoot, all will be well
Hi Joy, Theres no right or wrong, Freedom of speech
Enjoy the process in planning the wedding, i hope your HTB is understanding n not adding stress to u. Men are really some creators u can never understand. whatever it is, make your move voice it out if need be.
Jus curious which church are you from since you say Amen? haha
Well God is good, he does not condemn you for not treating ur parents well, Love u of who u are n not what u did
Have fun with the planning babe!
Enjoy the process in planning the wedding, i hope your HTB is understanding n not adding stress to u. Men are really some creators u can never understand. whatever it is, make your move voice it out if need be.
Jus curious which church are you from since you say Amen? haha
Well God is good, he does not condemn you for not treating ur parents well, Love u of who u are n not what u did
Have fun with the planning babe!
Min: Brave in the sense that Joy had a tough childhood n struggling the storm alone. not by getting her shampoo. well we only start buying shampoo when we are much older when we are more picky which shampoo is better or smells better. not when we are schooling, where got extra money to buy a 6 bucks shampoo. I feel for you but rem, things happen for a reason, and i know certain people are placed in your life to make u a stronger person. See how independent you are now
Let lose n be happy, if every thing is smooth sailing, you can never grow from what u are
Let lose n be happy, if every thing is smooth sailing, you can never grow from what u are
pocarisweat
New Member
Joy: yah .. without ur mum, u wont be so independent … ur mum is gg to donate her estate to a charity? Anyway, we r filial to our parents not becoz we want to gain anything … juz b nice to ur mum .. ur mum will definitely appreciate ur love towards her someday .. but even if not appreciated also not choice … family is not liked friend, boyfriend or even hubby .. if they r not nice, can just dump them and find anor one!
pocarisweat
New Member
amelia: tx for dropping in~ so when r u getting married?
Vivi, He hasn't propose yet, hope he wun appear with a pee sai size diamond ring in front of me. My house will be ready 2013 2nd quarter n so maybe anytime 2012-2013. BTW we both are not into wedding dinner or lunch, too much hassle n waste money. We probably will have church wedding n lunch after that. I wana march in with my dog also leh
I already have a BS which i sign up with my ex 8 years ago so am gonna use it
how many are really extending their blessing when u pass them your invitation card, ist time come to their mind is: huh? another red bomb! so we are going with the easy one. get it over n done with. Im blessed to have a easy Future in Laws, dun think they will make a fuss for not having wedding dinner. It cost a lot of money wor!!
Nice to know u gals
I already have a BS which i sign up with my ex 8 years ago so am gonna use it
Nice to know u gals
Thanks ladies, looking forward to my pre wedding shoot
Amelia, easy going FIL doesn't mean they will be easy going with their son's wedding..i've been thru that. I've the same thought as u at the begining & i only wanted a simple buffet lunch wedding, end up all the ideas of simple are been rejected.
Does size of diamond ring matter? As long as our bf/htb loves us the most & wish to spend rest of his life with us...that isn't the sweetest thought & moment? ^.^
Amelia, easy going FIL doesn't mean they will be easy going with their son's wedding..i've been thru that. I've the same thought as u at the begining & i only wanted a simple buffet lunch wedding, end up all the ideas of simple are been rejected.
Does size of diamond ring matter? As long as our bf/htb loves us the most & wish to spend rest of his life with us...that isn't the sweetest thought & moment? ^.^
christina_grace
New Member
Hi Joy
Know that you are loved and that the path of the righteous gets brighter and brighter!
Admire your tenacity and strength to go through this!
Know that you are loved and that the path of the righteous gets brighter and brighter!
Admire your tenacity and strength to go through this!
christina_grace
New Member
Enjoy your shoot MC!!
Agree with you..i initially wanted a 14 table wedding banquet...cos both parents and ILs all say they are easy ...now i still have to throw a 35-table one...so yeah...
On the diamond..i feel that there is no point insisting on a BIG one beyond his budget, cos after the wedding, his assets are also yours to be shared.
Agree with you..i initially wanted a 14 table wedding banquet...cos both parents and ILs all say they are easy ...now i still have to throw a 35-table one...so yeah...
On the diamond..i feel that there is no point insisting on a BIG one beyond his budget, cos after the wedding, his assets are also yours to be shared.
michimichi
New Member
Hey queen queen!! Omg haha my wedding will be a masquarae theme cos of the date being near to halloween too!! Think it will be so cool!!!
Hey Joy.. Do hope the positive stuffs in your life keeps you going. Stay strong!!
Hey Joy.. Do hope the positive stuffs in your life keeps you going. Stay strong!!
pocarisweat
New Member
Amelia: ur wedding will be a simple affair & u have already start researching on wedding stuff. . wow~ *clap clap*
joy: oh well .. no point been angry as she is ur mum ...
MC: me planning to hire a photobooth too .. think it comes with props . .but still thinking .. haha ...
joy: oh well .. no point been angry as she is ur mum ...
MC: me planning to hire a photobooth too .. think it comes with props . .but still thinking .. haha ...
pocarisweat
New Member
opps ... realised it is michelle and not michi that is having the masquarade theme. ..
Hey cloudy, i was sourcing for my bridal car last wk & realised alot of car & rental companies are already almost fully booked for oct...so its better for u to be quick. May be get a close friend or relative to help u on that in sg 1st.
If ur htb is going to self drive, most rental require 3 yrs for license & also full payment as deposit. End up, i booked the pink london cab as my choice
If ur htb is going to self drive, most rental require 3 yrs for license & also full payment as deposit. End up, i booked the pink london cab as my choice