What should I do?
- Thread starter jamie1712
- Start date
mirrorcelcius
Member
Jamie,
Living in Singapore, enjoy........
Life that are complex are not useful, Life that are useful are simple.
Money make things easy as well as difficult. when things involved money, many aspects will be questionable.
the universe run by the numbers, now even your life runs by the numbers. In modern world number is everything.....now you have to know how to play the game.
if i were you, i will be a single mother and take care of the kid. however, don't underestimate the impact of the broken home kids. it is like an adult with no money. you will take away their future. no body can help them.
Sometimes i always wonder, why need to concern "others" to think of you. There is 7 Billion people on this planet, do you need to consider them how they think of you ?
Living in Singapore, enjoy........
Life that are complex are not useful, Life that are useful are simple.
Money make things easy as well as difficult. when things involved money, many aspects will be questionable.
the universe run by the numbers, now even your life runs by the numbers. In modern world number is everything.....now you have to know how to play the game.
if i were you, i will be a single mother and take care of the kid. however, don't underestimate the impact of the broken home kids. it is like an adult with no money. you will take away their future. no body can help them.
Sometimes i always wonder, why need to concern "others" to think of you. There is 7 Billion people on this planet, do you need to consider them how they think of you ?
Kristinlopez
New Member
Hi All,
I'm also a foreigner and i just found out i'm pregnant with my Singaporean bf. He wanted me to abort the child but i cant..I need someone to talk to..Right now i dont know what to do and I'm alone here.
I'm also a foreigner and i just found out i'm pregnant with my Singaporean bf. He wanted me to abort the child but i cant..I need someone to talk to..Right now i dont know what to do and I'm alone here.
sadman2009
Active Member
There's nothing much you can do. It's either you too get married or you abort the child. If not you will be sent back to your own country. To get married, I think you will need to get MOM permission. More importantly is your boyfriend willing to take the responsibility and will both of you be happy after getting married.
christinec
New Member
Sorry to hear that but the decision lies in your hands, if you go with an abortion then you get your life back and move on from the entire incident. There may be many reasons for not wanting an abortion but ultimately it is the responsibility you have towards yourself and no one else. Besides it takes a couple truly in love and wanting to raise a child with the right morals, values and with lots love.
Kristinlopez
New Member
Thanks christinec & sadman2009, I'm under employment pass and been here for 7yrs. It's really against my will and my religion to go for abortion. My singaporean bf told me that he bare all expenses if i go for abortion but if i decided to go with pregnancy, he will be out of the picture and stop contact him..I wanted to share my long story here and I will open a new thread what really happens but now i wanted to know my legal rights if you have any ideas?
1. Can i put his name in my child birth cert if i gave birth here?
2. Can i ask for child maintenance born out of wedlock?
3. What other rights i have and my unborn child against him?
Now, i got so felt so much hatred and revenge to him..He is so cruel, cunning and evil man!
sadman2009
Active Member
I don't think you can put his name on the Birth Cert. You can't even give birth here if you are not married. You will be sent back if I'm not wrong.
If you want to pursue the case, may be you can try DNA testing but I'm not sure about it. Without married and proof that the child is his son, you can't do anything to him.
lonely_desire78
Member
Fighting is perhaps part and parcel of a relationship. But, holding onto the grudges and throwing out again in subsequent fights, that's what I find very damaging.
Humans being what they are... humans, it is not uncommon for people to drag out the old debts and start fighting over the same things. Its draining and demotivating. Yet, if left unmanaged, it will surely result in more issues which may eventually lead to both parties stopping to talk to each other. It may sound like common scene in dramas. Still, its a very real issue. What happens if both parties really stop talking, the relationship is done and dead. Unfortunately, like any living creature, a dead relationship is near (or absolutely) impossible to resurrect.
Before all that happens, I also think its important to ask why did we fall for that someone in the first place? What made it so worth while? Have things changed? While we should never be frivolous minded in a relationship, its quite human to be swayed by circumstances. From time to time, its also quite "easy" to think of just getting out and "doing nothing" about it.
Fighting is fine. Yet, how about coming together and still finding meaning in it? That's really tough. One fight not too bad. Fight twice.... still ok. Fight a few more times.... and many more times..... who wouldn't be discouraged and demotivated? I can raise my two hands to tell you that I would feel bad as well.
My friend says "boss is always right, but not always correct". He also tells that its not whether we are right.... rather its more of how we communicate which makes that difference. He is exactly right. Are we not human in nature? Doing is so trying.... You may have done your part and what you think is your best, but your other half may never think the same. Unspoken of thoughts are the frightening ones. Those you know are problems are really not as bad as compared to those which you do not know.
As I write this, don't you agree that its what we all go through.... thinking we found something and strive hard for it.... yet later to think of "doing nothing". There are no easy solutions. Pictures of cool Korean couples coming together, after a dozen or two of challenges and hardships. That isn't as long as the problems in a relationship.
To end, its probably true... woman doesn't need answers, they just need to be heard. Right answers don't solve problems, yet hearing her problems solve many of her problems (including the man's). May be we should all stop trying and fighting and think over what we want instead and relook at the problems. Would we be happier with more clarity in mind?
Just my 2 cents long worth.
miloice
Well-Known Member
It is double edged. People realize their differences much more from conflicts rather than honeymoon periods. Fights are rather inevitable part because no 2 persons is exactly the same and have the same emotion, reaction, priority and perception. How everyone cope with conflict differs. Some don't cope with it, they transfer it to their partners, blaming them for their unhappiness. Just be honest and reflect, one would realize if they are coping with their differences in the relationship, learning from it or just enduring for the moment of peace and bearing more grudges and resentments over time.
NataDesCoco
New Member
Wonder what happened to TS. Baby should be 1 year old already ba?!
