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- Thread starter cheerio
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everytime something happens, i tell him what i'm unhappy about and it becomes my fault.
Maybe its really my fault, he is stress enough with his work and i shouldnt add to his stress by being unhappy abt something trival(to him) of me being jealous.
Went to the usual pub we always go together the last time after chatters gathering ytd, he was at another pub before he came to find me. He kept his promise to me not to drink too much. Later in the night, he told me his unhappiness in his work and i felt sad and wei qu for him. i hugged him and pat pat his back with tears rolling down. He asked me not to cry like a little girl and that he is fine. After that i continued playing pool and drinking, he went on to drink with other ppl. Just before we were about to go, he stood in front of another girl (duno who's frnd la) and fixed his eyes on her staring at her singing. She finished her song and he asked her some stupid questions like why she hold mic like dat de bla bla bla... He walked back to me and asked me what happened. I asked him, the girl very pretty hor.. she sing song u muz stand in front of her and look at her like that. He asked me, wa lau.. like dat also jealous ah? i nodded my head. Then he began showing his attitude face and wanting to drink more. Others stopped him from drinking saying he still needs to drive de.. i grab his hand and say lets go. He shoved my hand away and walk away from me saying, i duno what happened to u again la. Outside the pub, i stood in front of him, but he refused to look or talk to me. I very pek chek, i jus walked away and took cab home myself. Nb, wasted $25 on cab, muz u-turn to a ATM withdraw $ for the cab uncle and muz walk home some more. Damn suay, took a cab with no NETS machine de. (Lesson learnt, when u walked away nonchalently next time, remember to take either comfort or citicab if u got nt much cash left).
The more i think the more i buey tahan, tears rolled down while i was in cab and on the way walking home.. I called him and he say he wanted to go drink some more, i asked him dont drink le and come home please, he said ok. Called him at 5 again and he say he is on his way back le. I fell asleep while waiting for him at the sofa. When he was back, he asked me to go to the bed and sleep, it was 6am already. Everything was ok already. Machiam nothing happened, but i kept my silence through out the morning while he prepared for work. The only sentence i replied him was, byebye.
I just feel i don even have the rights to get angry or jealous lor.. If i do, i am adding pressure to his stress.. ends up being my fault again... I know i hold an important place in his heart, he had been accompanying every evening after work for the pass 2 or 3 weeks. A lot had been asking why he so long nvr go to the pub and they were told that he was accompaying his gf(me). He happily told me that he bought 5 or 6 vcds to watch together.. those shows are those which i had wanted to watch..
Thinking back, i should have kept my calm no matter how jealous i am to avoid any argument or attitude face battle bah...
Ai ya, my case very small thing la.. i jus felt sad at heart and feel better now putting all my thoughts into words.. Thanks for asking, hurt and serene.
Btw Hurt, how come u so late haven sleep? Or isit u wake up so early de.. i do hope you are feeling much better and stronger le ya.. Take care.
Maybe its really my fault, he is stress enough with his work and i shouldnt add to his stress by being unhappy abt something trival(to him) of me being jealous.
Went to the usual pub we always go together the last time after chatters gathering ytd, he was at another pub before he came to find me. He kept his promise to me not to drink too much. Later in the night, he told me his unhappiness in his work and i felt sad and wei qu for him. i hugged him and pat pat his back with tears rolling down. He asked me not to cry like a little girl and that he is fine. After that i continued playing pool and drinking, he went on to drink with other ppl. Just before we were about to go, he stood in front of another girl (duno who's frnd la) and fixed his eyes on her staring at her singing. She finished her song and he asked her some stupid questions like why she hold mic like dat de bla bla bla... He walked back to me and asked me what happened. I asked him, the girl very pretty hor.. she sing song u muz stand in front of her and look at her like that. He asked me, wa lau.. like dat also jealous ah? i nodded my head. Then he began showing his attitude face and wanting to drink more. Others stopped him from drinking saying he still needs to drive de.. i grab his hand and say lets go. He shoved my hand away and walk away from me saying, i duno what happened to u again la. Outside the pub, i stood in front of him, but he refused to look or talk to me. I very pek chek, i jus walked away and took cab home myself. Nb, wasted $25 on cab, muz u-turn to a ATM withdraw $ for the cab uncle and muz walk home some more. Damn suay, took a cab with no NETS machine de. (Lesson learnt, when u walked away nonchalently next time, remember to take either comfort or citicab if u got nt much cash left).
The more i think the more i buey tahan, tears rolled down while i was in cab and on the way walking home.. I called him and he say he wanted to go drink some more, i asked him dont drink le and come home please, he said ok. Called him at 5 again and he say he is on his way back le. I fell asleep while waiting for him at the sofa. When he was back, he asked me to go to the bed and sleep, it was 6am already. Everything was ok already. Machiam nothing happened, but i kept my silence through out the morning while he prepared for work. The only sentence i replied him was, byebye.
I just feel i don even have the rights to get angry or jealous lor.. If i do, i am adding pressure to his stress.. ends up being my fault again... I know i hold an important place in his heart, he had been accompanying every evening after work for the pass 2 or 3 weeks. A lot had been asking why he so long nvr go to the pub and they were told that he was accompaying his gf(me). He happily told me that he bought 5 or 6 vcds to watch together.. those shows are those which i had wanted to watch..
Thinking back, i should have kept my calm no matter how jealous i am to avoid any argument or attitude face battle bah...
Ai ya, my case very small thing la.. i jus felt sad at heart and feel better now putting all my thoughts into words.. Thanks for asking, hurt and serene.
Btw Hurt, how come u so late haven sleep? Or isit u wake up so early de.. i do hope you are feeling much better and stronger le ya.. Take care.
green_tranquility
New Member
Meng,
I dun think Mayi's bf is vexed with work. He behaved like this more than once.
Mayi,
Your bf is a man who likes to be carefree and values freedom. He hates to answer to anyone including u (from the past cases that u mentioned).
Maybe he's more suitable to be a single than a bf. He drinks and befriend gals at pub like noone's business. This is his lifestyle and he already behaved like this with his ex-wife. He probably won't change his lifestyle. It's either you close both eyes or say byebye to him.
Are u awake? I can buzz u.
I dun think Mayi's bf is vexed with work. He behaved like this more than once.
Mayi,
Your bf is a man who likes to be carefree and values freedom. He hates to answer to anyone including u (from the past cases that u mentioned).
Maybe he's more suitable to be a single than a bf. He drinks and befriend gals at pub like noone's business. This is his lifestyle and he already behaved like this with his ex-wife. He probably won't change his lifestyle. It's either you close both eyes or say byebye to him.
Are u awake? I can buzz u.
green_tranquility
New Member
Ok time to wash clothes with hands!
Mum went 5-day tour and mentally unstable Dad dismantled all the toilet bowls, ended up washing machine has no water flow
Mum went 5-day tour and mentally unstable Dad dismantled all the toilet bowls, ended up washing machine has no water flow
green_tranquility
New Member
Meng,
She used soft approach many times already.
It's up to Mayi how she wants to handle situation now. I think she'll be fine afer her bf looks her up and "hong" her keke.
She used soft approach many times already.
It's up to Mayi how she wants to handle situation now. I think she'll be fine afer her bf looks her up and "hong" her keke.
mindset is one thing that the person got to change on his own accord, nobody can make him do it lah.. i oso find that Mayi has the right to feel jealous, and its not tat she started a bitching session with the bf, she is just telling him she is not happy wat. this is communication isnt it? work stress? everybody, rightfully, will have that mah, work stress si beh dua meh?? and Mayi is trying her best to give support liao... hiaz...
Mayi, you are still young, at this point of time this man might seems to be the man of your life, but nobody knows the future.. now quarrel is better than next time settle down already then every day quarrel. just try to get out of the sadness as quickly as you can. K? *sayang sayang*
Mayi, you are still young, at this point of time this man might seems to be the man of your life, but nobody knows the future.. now quarrel is better than next time settle down already then every day quarrel. just try to get out of the sadness as quickly as you can. K? *sayang sayang*
i always say that love itself is not enough to sustain a relationship, two can be very in love, but character and expectation a total mis-match, they might be able to give and take for a period of time, but marriage is a lifetime, how long can you è¿å°± the other party? i dont believe that people can change for their partner, as in their fundamental nature, so its impt for us to evaluate whether the person is suitable for us FIRST before going into a deeper relationship.
quarrels like this they always happen, then after a few days, when things cool off, the couple will just forget about the matter and happily be together again, but has the problem been solved? so its like a vicious cycle, quarrel, patch back, quarrel, patch back again...
quarrels like this they always happen, then after a few days, when things cool off, the couple will just forget about the matter and happily be together again, but has the problem been solved? so its like a vicious cycle, quarrel, patch back, quarrel, patch back again...
green_tranquility
New Member
LOL yesterday at outing, all chatters questioned me when I commented that I dun believe in "True Love"!
Well I believe in love but not true love.
Well I believe in love but not true love.
HI Chatters! Thks all.. me feeling better liao..
suddenly i duno wad to reply here.. i jus type out a summary of sms i had replied to greenie..
"Its nothing big deal for him to behave like dat when he is out.. cos he feel he also nvr do anything dui bu qi wo mah. So i cant be jealous abt it, ends up its my fault. Since i love him so much, i can only choose to close an eye to it like what he said to me, he also nvr hanky panky. He had also changed a lot of other habits for me" Green replied saying i have got high tolerance level. My reply:"Maybe its sort of my way to try adapt to his lifestyle n habit bah. If in the end i still cant take it, at least i had tried my very best for the rship. Also another way of preparing to give up the rship too."
Actually, whats the definition of true love? Any difference from love and true love?
suddenly i duno wad to reply here.. i jus type out a summary of sms i had replied to greenie..
"Its nothing big deal for him to behave like dat when he is out.. cos he feel he also nvr do anything dui bu qi wo mah. So i cant be jealous abt it, ends up its my fault. Since i love him so much, i can only choose to close an eye to it like what he said to me, he also nvr hanky panky. He had also changed a lot of other habits for me" Green replied saying i have got high tolerance level. My reply:"Maybe its sort of my way to try adapt to his lifestyle n habit bah. If in the end i still cant take it, at least i had tried my very best for the rship. Also another way of preparing to give up the rship too."
Actually, whats the definition of true love? Any difference from love and true love?
i only believe in money now lah..simi love simi true love..it juz takes a small thing to trigger off big crap
gals r like dat..4ever will find excuses or blame themselves 4 sumting dat may not really b their fault
Mayi my only advice to u is to be true n kind to urself
gals r like dat..4ever will find excuses or blame themselves 4 sumting dat may not really b their fault
Mayi my only advice to u is to be true n kind to urself
anywhere, what will be will be, dont have to think too hard, just try to handle it the best we can, and like serene said, always be kind to ourselves, we gals tend to sacrifice more but at the end of the day, if you sacrifice hoping for better treatment or that the other person will treat you better, it always end up in disappointment.. sunday liao, last shiok relax day of the week (or is this the first day of a new week?), we should all chill yah...
me studying the stupid law text book, really wan to sleep ah...
me studying the stupid law text book, really wan to sleep ah...
green_tranquility
New Member
Cheerio,
Sengkang compasspoint just open a new Missy Donuts outlet at level 1. Ya lo, so many donut outlets until the queues are that long anymore.
The gal will find that the man is her "True love" when she is madly in love with him. When she loses feeling for the man, she is able to move on and the next relationship becomes "True love". It applies to man.
I also think that relationship doesn't survive on love alone, there are too many other factors involved. Everyone actually has a agenda for relationship, i.e. the woman/man MUST be able to give me something she/he wants in return for her/his time and love.
Just my weird thinkings about love keke.
Mayi,
The other thread has the quote "Dun let someone else becomes a piority in your life when you are just an option in his." I know you loves your bf but dun let him take you for granted ok
Now still super bloated ... Ate 4 pancakes at 4pm plus, then dozed off for hours just now.
Sengkang compasspoint just open a new Missy Donuts outlet at level 1. Ya lo, so many donut outlets until the queues are that long anymore.
The gal will find that the man is her "True love" when she is madly in love with him. When she loses feeling for the man, she is able to move on and the next relationship becomes "True love". It applies to man.
I also think that relationship doesn't survive on love alone, there are too many other factors involved. Everyone actually has a agenda for relationship, i.e. the woman/man MUST be able to give me something she/he wants in return for her/his time and love.
Just my weird thinkings about love keke.
Mayi,
The other thread has the quote "Dun let someone else becomes a piority in your life when you are just an option in his." I know you loves your bf but dun let him take you for granted ok
Now still super bloated ... Ate 4 pancakes at 4pm plus, then dozed off for hours just now.
green_tranquility
New Member
Serene,
" gals r like dat..4ever will find excuses or blame themselves 4 sumting dat may not really b their fault "
Agree. We can see it from some threads.
" gals r like dat..4ever will find excuses or blame themselves 4 sumting dat may not really b their fault "
Agree. We can see it from some threads.
actually mayi, have u tried doing that same approach to your bf & see his reaction? if he's jealous, then tell him 'great, you finally understand what i'd been going thru' & if he has no reaction, then mayb u would like to give a deep thought on this r/s. see, it has to be 2 ways traffic & not just 1 way; so if it's only 1 way effort, then it's not fair. like wat serene said, be kind to ourselves. give a thot...
dead_heart
New Member
gallie, i do not think mayi should play games with the bf. who knows, the bf might take it as a challenge and then talk with even more gals to provoke mayi.
sgbabydoll
Active Member
No lah. Don't put love to test. May lead to more misunderstanding and quarrels.
green_tranquility
New Member
Gallie,
Her bf is eat 'soft', dun eat 'hard' type leh.
Her bf is eat 'soft', dun eat 'hard' type leh.
dead_heart
New Member
gallie, i dun encourage ppl to give irresponsible suggestion.......for mayi's case, ur suggestion definitely will back fire and mayi will be 'crying' even more than last nite
sgbabydoll
Active Member
Convenient wisdom or theory doesn't work one lah.
Mayi, hugz ok.
Mayi, hugz ok.
i dont think that his bf takes soft approach better Mayi got to treat him that way, that is giving in, and i dont think that relationship works that way, never should one party keep giving in..
and, gals should not treat her men too nicely, take too good care of him, time goes by he will take it for granted, and he will say that the gal behaves like his mum lah, make him feel no freedom lah... we see these in SB all the time wat..
i guess, Mayi got to take a step back, like many already advise her, and have her own life, as in very 充实的人生..
and, gals should not treat her men too nicely, take too good care of him, time goes by he will take it for granted, and he will say that the gal behaves like his mum lah, make him feel no freedom lah... we see these in SB all the time wat..
i guess, Mayi got to take a step back, like many already advise her, and have her own life, as in very 充实的人生..
green_tranquility
New Member
Cheerio,
My soft approach means not taking revenge... it's definitely not letting the guy take the gal for granted
My soft approach means not taking revenge... it's definitely not letting the guy take the gal for granted
relationship is definitely not ä½ åšåˆä¸€æˆ‘åšå五, i think the only way you can make a person think and see clearly what he has done wrong is to leave him for a while and make him realise things on his own, like realising the gal has been doing this and that for him, been there for him and stuff like tat...
green_tranquility
New Member
Cheerio,
Ur body feeling better today?
Dun think Mayi has the heart to do that to her bf.
Ur body feeling better today?
Dun think Mayi has the heart to do that to her bf.
sgbabydoll
Active Member
I am commenting in general lah...I think girls shouldn't be emotionally too dependent on their partner and never revolve your life around him.
relationship is definitely not ä½ åšåˆä¸€æˆ‘åšå五, i think the only way you can make a person think and see clearly what he has done wrong is to leave him for a while and make him realise things on his own, like realising the gal has been doing this and that for him, been there for him and stuff like tat...
green_tranquility
New Member
Next outing is Dim Sum!
Who are interested?
Who are interested?
green_tranquility
New Member
Cheerio,
U becoming vegetarian? Today I went to eat Xiao Long Bao.
U becoming vegetarian? Today I went to eat Xiao Long Bao.
green_tranquility
New Member
Chatter group photo
green_tranquility
New Member
Mayi,
I find u photogenic leh. Always look mei mei on photos keke.
I find u photogenic leh. Always look mei mei on photos keke.
green_tranquility
New Member
I never put any blusher, why my face looks so red on photo!
Maybe eat too much heaty snacks and chocolates.
Maybe eat too much heaty snacks and chocolates.
dead_heart
New Member
Good Morning Chatters
dragonfruit
Active Member
Good Morning Everyone.
Mayi, hope you are feeling better today. Sorry that Uncle Long can't give you good advice on your situation as I am generally more of a listener.
Mayi, hope you are feeling better today. Sorry that Uncle Long can't give you good advice on your situation as I am generally more of a listener.
dragonfruit
Active Member
*raise hand for dim sum outing*