Chatters


i dun dare to call him.. cos i'm afraid his is annoyed of my that one sms and actions already....

Serene i jus thought he might be at home and able to accompany me in game, but he is already out with his frnds.

"The delay of his SMS consolation sure make u feel worse. "

Ya green, this feeling is torturing.....
 
green coz those crazy ppl i noe dun allow me to b alone knowing i always hu si luan xiang haha

n i'm so proud of u..keep it up babe
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dragonfruit we shld giv ourselves a big pat!

Mayi i understand..when there's expection..theres somehow bound to b disappointment..so now u noe perhaps u shldnt expect somethings..n when things turn out least expected..it comes as a pleasant surprise to u
 
ya.. i haf already minimise my expectations since the last argument, but tonight this incident is something i feel i have the right to know... at least i know he is out with his frnds or what i can play my game happily while waiting for him to reach home and call me, rather then now; this rotten feeling....

Do u think i can send me another sms(a mild one). Will he feel even more annoyed?
 
yes i tink he would feel irritated...men..u noe them..if they dun feel they NEED to..they will not understand even if u send them a million text

perhaps u shld leave him alone..let him enjoy himself..n then find a time to talk to him abt tis again
 
Yeah green, that type of anniversary will be worth looking forward to year after year.

Yes Serene, we both deserve a pat on ourselves. Pat ...pat...
 
i duno what i can do now to make my time pass faster and less torturing while waiting for his reply or call... my frnd say i can reconsider about the relationship if he bo chap me tonight...

My heart is so painful.... I haf already tried not to think so much but i just cant control my temper... damn the 'da yi ma'....
 
cannot... the moment i login everybody starts asking wher i haf been the past few days, y nvr login.. and isit i am too busy pak tor-ing with him and will ask me hw is he bla bla bla and ask to send regards to him....

i think i go watch the 10pm hk drama bah... come back to chat chat during commercial....

Thanks green and serene... i am feeling better already..
 
*pat pat Mayi* dun wait..go do something else..the more u bother the more pek chek u r

green is rite, go n play ur game..u muz do something 4 urself rather than wasting time getting upset n tinking all the weird things

i'm oso doing my work..mayb shld go jln kayu later for supper later
 
From a guy's point of view, we guys often are puzzled with the reactions of our partners, and these thoughts more or less would come to our minds:
"Why is she so pissed again?"
"What have i done wrong?"
"Small things also throw tantrum?"
"Whatever i reply, she sure will be angry..might as well let things cool down"

Just to let the gals in here understand how we men think and act MOST of the times... and we usually end up in a fix as opposed to what you gals may think of us. More often than not, we men are goal-oriented creatures; when we are set on doing something, we may neglect another aspect... that's when misunderstandings often arise... but who is to say that we bochap?

I speak only for men who often got caught in general issues/situations/scenarios, and not for those plain insincere creeps.
 
green ah.. green. You know what you want in your life after going thru' the high and lowssssss from your r/s. Honestly, as what ah siao has implied... a leopard will never change its spots, and Serene has commented that "human beings r juz like dat...until they lose something then they realise how important some ppl is to them".
True true.. very true. We will always remain who we are, unless we go thru' a life-changing painful lesson, or being enlightened by some unexpected 'saint' at a stroke of chance. But honestly, how do we really learn if we haven't had the chance to go thru' the painful procedure ourselves - and for the betterment, we realised what we really want to do after all that merry-go-round shit?

Mayi, hope you don't mind me but I honestly feel that there has to be a limit control for most illogical stuffs ie. our wild assumptions, our snapshot reactions - which would only pile up in a whole heap of mess quicker than expected.
 
i duno... i am still very confused...
It seems to me that no matter what i do (be it clarifying, explaining or requesting) it always ends up being my fault.

After that heated argument, i had curb my temper very much and everything has been smoothly for the pass 1 month... until this evening that i assume that he might be at home and able to accompanying me online, then i realise he is out with his buddies. I nvr blame him for spending time with his buddies, but why cant he just put my heart at ease by informing me he will be out with his buddies for the nite.
What if he never inform me he is knocking off at 7, i will also assume he is working till late(he normally calls me after his work when he reach home) and when i call him at 10+ or 11+ then realise he is actually out with his buddies. Can you relate to how i am feeling?
Maybe its just me that i need assurance and feeling secure, and its just him that he finds there is no need to inform me of his whereabouts and update me about his life. His reason being, doesnt want me to worry. This is exactly the opposite on how i will feel. Asking him to update me about his plans and whereabouts like he will be joining his friends for a drink is it too much? I don sms or call him during his working hours after 9pm, at most i will drop him a sms say i miss him or ask if he had a busy day. I am learning to give him the space he needs, but i also need assurance. I had put this need of mine across to him before, he reply saying he doesnt want me to worry so much when he is outside so he rather me not know about anything. Advice me what i should do please. I am really feeling very tired about having to console and assure myself constantly and inject more trust and faith in him. Sometimes i feel like giving up, but my heart just ache everytime this thought flashes across my mind because this relationship doesnt come easily and i had always hope to work things out.
 
Mayi.. in general most men r like tat. Despite how many times u can tell them how u feel, they will nv rmb it. I guess if u realli love ur bf, then u will have to learn some way to deal with tat situation and accept it. Coz it seems he's not going to change or do anything bout it for u. And men, they wont do anything bout it one. So I feel u have to make ur own decision. Love him, juz have to accept and deal with this problem in another way. Or not u will probably have to find someone else tat can be more sensitive in this area.
 
Hmm.. Mayi, I rem my bf used to go out and nvr told me, sometimes I can don't hear from him for days. I dont sms him, when he calls, I will ask, "who r you". I got tell him, at least drop me a sms to let me know what he's doing. I dont see him during the weekdays at all. Sometimes, my friends ask me, so where' ur bf. I tell them "I dont know", they will look at me with disbelief. But I really dont know..

Now he drops me sms time to time, to tell me what's he doing after work, going out or what.

I think it's not that we gals dont let the guys go out, have their space. But being in a r/s, we shld always think of the other party's feeling. This is what I feel..
 
dats the thing..its something we gals tink the guys could do..yet the guys tink its too trivial to inform n dun c the need..n dats when misunderstanding occurs
 
haiz... i duno what he is thinking now.. hafen reply my sms and hafen call me.. suan le..

i shall rest early tonight and if he still doesnt wan get back to me den i shall send him an email to let him know mu concerns and feelings. If face to face talk or chat on phone, 80% will lead to another heated argument. cos whenever i mention something he dislike to hear he will activate his 'combat mode'.

Thanks all... =)
 
today i eat eat eat and more eat!! hahaha... damn shiok...

had korean food, donut, french crepe, nasi padang and buffet at mandarin oriental (the mini tarts are sooooo good... with fresh raspberries...em yum...)

btw, people, if you guys happen to be at plaza sing, try the missy donuts, i find it nice man. the crepes are over-rated though...

ok, koon liao zzZZzz...
 
Good Morning Chatters!

I cant slp well... Heart still very pain... he nvr contact me whole nite.. this is the first time he is ignoring me.... sobs... Maybe he drank too much last night and reach home still feeling angry with me bah... suan le...
 
Mayi good morning~

Don't assume about his feelings and his previous activities anymore, nor probe him further about the incident. It might trigger more negative emotions and the whole thing might just blown up out of proportion again.

i would suggest, to put off any form of communication for now. I believe you've got your messages pretty clear last night (not in an aggressive style, i hope) and given some time (like half a day or so), he is more likely to respond to you in a positive, calm manner.
From that point, you two can talk better sense which makes the communication effective and more understandable.

My few cents.
 
-nod nod-

Thank you! ya, my message to him wasnt very aggressive, i just put my how i felt across to him. I shant initiate any form of communciation with him, let him cool down and think it over and wait for him to respond to me bah.

=) i came across this quote yesterday,

When you're hurt, cry a river, build a bridge and get over it!!
 
Mayi,
I think there's some trust issues.

I'm one who gives BF a lot of freedom (according to my guy friends). He is free to go out with other guy or lady friends without telling me and I dun get affected. Maybe I believe that monitoring the guy doesn't help to make him faithful.

Dunno la...I find that we gals must learn to be more independent sometimes. Life isn't centred just around love. Just my 2cents worth. :P
 
Hi Vios,
I already gave BF a painful lesson by breaking up with him last year. He was very sad and promised me to curb that behavior. He still hasn't changed haha.

Hi all,
Till now, I never doubt my BF's love for me. He cheered me up when I walked through my family woes. I cheered him up when he walked through his almost-bankrupt woes. But Love isn't enough to substain a marriage, there're other aspects to marriage and I shouldn't be blinded by love now.

Yesterday my BF called me 4 times and I didn't answer them. Now is my turn to ignore phone calls and take a rest
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Hey morning everyone.. Im feeling the Blues today. My HB this morning realli pissed me off very badly. I realli feel like im going to blast out at him already but Im juz controling. Hai~...
 
Sayang Pinky.. wad happened? wana share??

ya green, its not that i don trust him.. maybe i shouldnt feel affected when he doesnt inform and update me about his whereabouts and plans. Well, I shall start planning to meet my frnds out for drinks, coffee, clubbing, ktv and movie!!
 
Mayi - yah u should. I think the common problem with us women is tat we revolve our time and activities around our partners tat when they do something like this, we'll be kinda lost.

Im juz telling myself to be patience and juz trying to control myself not to lose my temper. Its so frustrating when u want to get to work and ur HB is still taking his time making his hair. And its not like the first time u tell him to hurry up. Then he leaves everything in a mess. The towel is in the mess, the bathroom looks like a hurricane juz came by, the sink is full of unwashed cups, clothes r all over the floor.... the list goes on. And IM EXPECTING. HOW CAN HE LET HIS EXPECTING WIFE DO ALL THIS SHIT.........

*sori.. mind my sudden outburst.
 
morning ~

wah... 7 early 8 early already got so many 哀怨的声音...

cheer up babes, life is definitely not only about love, else many of us will be dead now, but we didnt died and grew stronger and rediscover life..
 
keke.. so i am building a bridge now.. trying to get across.. heehee..

aiks.. i very 没有用.. i am too impatience and i jus don haf the patience to wait for him to respond. I just sent him a mild email, see if he will reply bah. at least i feel i had done my part to give in.
 
My BF is introvert and doesn't understand gals.

Sometimes when I feedback about certain displeasures eg. cancel appt last min, he will be lost and think.
'"What have i done wrong?"

I dunno to laugh or cry ;)
 
actually i think my bf oso quite introvert...
he keeps everything in his mind, seldom talk and will only chats with his buddy.
When he is out with me, my frnds commented that he is too quiet... he needs quite some time to warm up before he can crap with them...
 
Morning, peeps!

Big huggies to Greenie, Pinky and Mayi.

Hey, sometimes it is our own expectation of our partner or the relationship that kills us or the love. While we re-evaluate the relationship, let's take time to see if we need to re-adjust our expectation too.

For me, I only give two days out of a week to my bf. If he is not free on one of the days (sometimes it happens) or even both days (so far this has not happened yet), then too bad. The truth is I do have other things to attend to on the other five days.
 
The problem is I noe how long he takes. Which is generally always longer than me. Coz I tend to be a bit lazier when it comes to coming to work. I dont put make up on and I dont blow my hair as well, so as to save time. Not tat I want to, but I rather save looking good on the weekends so as to catch a bit more slp. This morning I already tried to ask him to get up before me so I can slp in a little longer. I also specifically told him Im not going to iron his shirt coz I already told him to do it last nite. He said he will do it in the morning. I said fine, as long as he's doing it himself. *can't spoil him by always doing the ironing for him, tat's y i told him beforehand, im not ironing it this time around. He takes a longer time in the shower, he had to iron his shirt, he had to blow and make his hair. I already finish dressing up, put breakfast on the table and even finished breakfast. He's still not done. I ended up waiting for him for another 15 mins. When he's done. I went to the room and the bathroom and I got realli fed up. The room is a mess, his clothes r everywhere. The bathroom is another mess, the towel is again, in a ball. His wax is not covered, the wax itself at the basin, the cover somewhere else. His ring is on the toilet. And all the lights r all still on. Aaaa....... Tat's my limit. And again today, I was late for work becoz I had to wait for him. And the best thing he said to me this morning. Its ok for preg woman to be late. *Faint
 



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