Catholic Advice Needed Please

demure

New Member
hi gals

all of us must drink lots water and rest well! lots of bugs going around!


celtricia
glad u are feeling better



btw me going to see the priest this Fri evening for our prenuptials. hope he's very chin-chye with his qns *fingers crossed*
 

celtricia

New Member
hey shern.. i really unwell leh.. heh.. but tis yr CNY also din eat much.. like not appetising leh.. mayb coz nid to distribute APs.. kekeke..


demure.. thanks.. any idea if d priest u r miting r quite serious in his wrk or love to joke ard..
 

shern

New Member
celt,it's the sad sight of the money going right
anyway glad to know u r better now...

demure, like wat celt said, it makes a difference whether the priest likes to joke or not...mine was relaxing and quite funny...
 

celtricia

New Member
shern.. haf to get better leh.. coz haf to go bak to wrk.. hai.. nw at work.. so sianz.. hw i wish can get 1 more day mc.. kekekek.. though its a sad sight to c our money gg into other ppl's pocket, i heard frm one of my elders dat giving APs is gd for us to receive luck or something gd to tis extend.. heh.. so i won't ponder over it liao.. kekeke..
 

celtricia

New Member
shern.. ya lor.. play black jack wif the kids n earn bak some.. hehehe.. no choice.. coz they ask us to b banker mah.. hehehehe..
 

demure

New Member
hi gals

heard my priest is a "very nice man" but donno how serious he is abt work. I always get impression the masses he conduct is like factory production coz he always chop-chop zoom through everything w/o saying anything extra.
hence his masses always end on time. tat's why initially I didnt want him to conduct our wedding coz I thot he was quite emotionless.

I wanted this other indian priest who always jokes around...but he said he's not going to be in town tat day so we had to go for the other guy. we were disappointed but had no choice.

however since then we have found out the indian guy is very serious abt procedures and details whereas the priest I got is a very nice guy. so everything turned out to be a blessing in disguise lor. hopefully my priest will be chin-chye during the pre-nup lor
 

demure

New Member
Hi little_ger

sorry for late reply! think I must haf missed this thread....

my church wedding will be at Church of St Anthony at Woodlands Ave 1. its not very well-known and there are relatively few weddings held there. however the pp I have met or contacted in the course of my wedding prep are all very very nice


btw gals, anyone can forward me the soft copy of the mass booklet? mine will be a full mass. email: wengweng@yahoo.com

tks hor...
 

celtricia

New Member
oki.. i'll forward u mine.. u check it out in a short while hor demure.. i heard of st anthony but dun really like d church there coz priest celebrate mass very slow n long.. heh..
 

demure

New Member
celtricia

thanks lots lots! muark!
will chk it out....

as for st anthony, u must be talking abt Fr P, hehe. our priest Fr C conduct mass very chop-chop fast one.... :p
 

pinklim

New Member
Hi everyone, im new here.. would like to know whether a divorcee be able to marry in a catholic church? (He did not hold any church ceremony in his previous marriage, he is not a catholic,but i am) thankzz..
 

demure

New Member
Hi Cindy

just did the pre-nup with my priest. I don't think he can marry in church even though his previous marriage was a civil ceremony. I remember this issue was 1 of the questions being asked during the pre-nup when the Fr went through the list. perhaps to be clearer on this, u can talk to your priest?


celtricia
got it! my FH got 'jealous' and asked why I anyhow "muark" other pp when he saw me replying u y'day, haha.....
 

celtricia

New Member
hey demure..

hahaha.. thankz for the muack! tell u hubby dun b so selfish lah.. share a muack wif a married lady is not a bad thing wat.. heh.. hope d bklet helps..

hi cindy..
tink its best to check it out wif ur parish priest..
 

ashleyethel

Active Member
hi cindy,
I think since the marriage was a civil marriage and that he is not a catholic, i dun see any problem for him to marry in church. In the first place, the marriage is not recognised by the catholic faith and he is a divorcee.

That was what I understand from my priest. But it would be better for you to check with your priest.
 

demure

New Member
errr...my priest is very chin-chye so he may not be a good gauge. he more or less stuck to the standard form which asks things like:
- are there any obstacles to our marriage?
- have any of us been married before even in a civil ceremony?
- are we related to each other closely, eg first cousins?
- is 1 of us from different religion? if so any apprehensions/obstacles/etc?
- are we criminals or on the run from a crime? (haha)

can't rem anything else from the form.....but the non-catholic one (ie me) gotta agree or acknolwedge tat I have no problems with a catholic wedding or bringing up my kids the catholic way. coz I'm non-catholic, our priest also has to seek a special dispensation from the archbishop for "disparity of cult".

also kena a long preaching from my priest who told my FH tat he's responsible for 'educating' and 'guiding' me, tat he has to explain to me the meaning of the masses etc etc. :p

tat's all I can recall. but think some other more sticky priests may ask more personal questions or smtg?
 

celtricia

New Member
yoz gals..

little_ger.. i dun really remember liao.. heh.. but i tot in our previous msgs, shern n i did tell u briefly the things the priest asked? hmmm... but based on demure's posting.. it roughly refreshes my memory.. heh.. sorry.. can't help much.. kekeke..
 

pinklim

New Member
Hi little_ger, thanks for answerin.. which church r u from.. i have not check with the priest yet.. but from my understandin as what demure has said.. it is said that a divorcee is not allow to marry in church.. but some people said other thing.. is it different church or priests has different opinion? i tot it supposed to be standard? juz like ROM before marryin in church.. why some priests are ok with it.. some are not.. gettin confused..
 

ashleyethel

Active Member
Thanks celtricia/demure.

cindy,
I attend mass at OLPS. I cant really answer your qn hence i think the priest would be the best person to advise you.
 

chelle

New Member
Hi Cindy, on your questions...
Divorcee marrying in church: This depends on whether the divorcee is a Christian. Because when you marry in church, in the eyes of the Lord, you are married even if legally you are divorced. Similarly, even if you are married outside and have yet to marry in the church, your marriage is still not recognised in the eyes of the lord, though lawfully you are married.

Anyway, it is always possible for a divorcee to be married in church. But you would need to talk to your priest. The priest will give the couple counselling.
To find out why the person has divorced, or the marriage has fallen apart. Is it really circumstances, or it's the person's fault. And if they move on to a new relationship, would they have the same problem.
So i guess that's why the priests' answers are varied, because theoretically speaking, it can't be accepted if they are christians. :D But do ask the priest.

As for the ROM before church wedding. Yes, you are allowed to do so. For practical reasons, like getting your flat etc. HOwever, just because you are married legally, the church does not allow you to stay with your FH in your love nest. For practical reasons of course.

So do have a talk with your priest if you need more information. And they will give you an answer you need.
 

demure

New Member
Hi gals

me got qn on different topic. I'll be having 6 jie meis but no bridesmaid. is it a must to have a bridesmaid for the church wedding? my FH will be having a best man n my friends say it'll be weird not to have a bridesmaid. for myself, the only diff I see betw a bridesmaid n my jie meis is tat she'll be walking down the aisle in front of me. otherwise her duties will be same as my jie meis which is why I don't think it is necessary to have a bridesmaid. all my jie meis are non-catholics n baulked at the thot of walking down the aisle in front of everyone. *sigh*
 

pinklim

New Member
thanks michelle,

my future hb is not a catholic.. i guess alot of people would have all their brows raised if a divorcee were to marry in church.. hai~ have not spoke to any priest yet.. am i the only person facing such situation???
 

chelle

New Member
demure: Bridesmaids are not a neccessity for a wedding, don't worry
it's up to u. The main thing is really that YOU walk down with your dad.


Cindy: No problem...but still just check with a priest on the procedure because i guess the priest marrying u guys may need to know why in the first place a divorce occured.
I'm sure there are many like you. Just not known. Don't worry.
Continue to be an example of christ's love. :D
 

demure

New Member
Michelle

thanks for the assurance! u have no idea how much your words meant. ya, its very impt for me to walk down the aisle with my dad. I only hope tat I will not cry....

hope u are able to find a definite answer to your problem. speak to a priest. perhaps he will be able to clear up a lot of issues for u. its certainly better than asking us blurr ones here... :p
 

joyz

New Member
Hi!
Can I know if it's possible to have ROM at the church? n wat is required? so does it mean tt the wedding cert is legalized too?
Thanks!
 

chelle

New Member
HI joyz,
u din make it clear if you are a catholic and the purpose of marrying in church.
making it simple, if you are a catholic and u wanna marry in church, then many couples ROM in church itself during mass..when they sign the marriage register. Note that MOST priests are recognised with a license to legalise a wedding. You will make arrangements with the church then and the priest will guide u along as to what is needed.
And if you are just looking for a place to solemnise ur marriage... without going through mass and all.. then a church is not a place for that. However, this is not to say that if you are not a catholic u cannot marry in church. You can approach the priest of the church u have in mind. And state your intentions and he will be able to guide you along too. But reasons like to have a fairytale wedding or that the church is nice and i like the setting, aren't good enough a reason to hold a marriage in the church.
Hope it helps
 

joyz

New Member
Thanks Michelle,
I am a catholic (sorry tt i din clarify tis in my prev msg). And have the intentions to solemnized/ROM at church. But not tto sure how I can go about it. I understd tt we hv to undergo MPC/EE. But how do we go abou tt?
p/s: My FH isn't a catholic.
Thanks!
 

chelle

New Member
No problem....

Yes you are right. The church requires couples to go through either MPC/EE or a counselling period with the priest (For those who can't get a slot for the MPC or EE programme). Anyway, for EE you can register online... just type Engaged Encounter in yahoos! and search under Singapore. That would cost you about 170 a camp. Personal advice take a day off before and after the camp. Cuz it can be mentally draining. Loads of sharing and talking things through.
Not too sure about MPC but u can ask your church.
No problem if your fh isn't a catholic. The camp is not a evangelistic camp.
So dont worry. BUt masses will be said each day to allow your fh to understand what your faith is about.

Hope it helps
 

tratties

New Member
Hi everyone... i'm new in this thread..

Can anyone share their softcopy of mass booklet with me? and contacts of the printers...

Thanks!!
 

este

New Member
My dear fellow catholic brides & brides-to-be, I need some help in locating a seamstress whose shop was located in Hillview area , but could have relocated elsewhere. The name of their shop was "PINKY" and they are catholics too...if any of you happen to have their contacts or know where they have relocated, please drop me an email at yip0646@singnet.com.sg Your help is greatly appreciated!!!!!!!
 

crescent

New Member
hi,

i'm a catholis n my FH is not. we r planning to ROM tis dec, most probably church wedding next yr.

i would like my church wedding to be a full mass... does anyone knows which church allows for inter-religion to have a full mass?

how long b4 my actual wedding date do i have the book the church, meet up wif the priest, etc ?

and is there any rehersal in the church b4 the actual wedding takes place?

please advise..thanks !
 

kurera

New Member
Hi yes you can choose either to go with a full mass with congregation or just service mass.

Your should check with your parish secretary.
Things like what is required when applying for a wedding service or mass. eg. MPC cert, 1 party baptism cert etc etc

Usually it's 6 months b4 AD you have to book.

You can meet with the priest earlier, at least he knows he have to meet himself free on the calender date. Than also make a tentative booking with the secretary. Payment usually can be made earlier.

It all depends on each church.

Also some churches do not allow fresh flowers on the pews..so all these better check with the parish secretary and book the priest first.

Rehersal?? Umm...usual cases the priest will have a meet with both bride and groom to make sure they know what they have to go through. Do you call that rehersal?

On AD where got time for rehersal? staging play huh?


kek kek kek

You so cute!
 

coffee79

New Member
hi to all,
i'll be holding my church wedding in july. i have a few queries that i hold i can find the rite answers in this forum, hope all can help.

1) how does the bride make her way to the church? if we were to follow chinese tradition, the bride needs to be under the umbrella while waling towards the car in the open, do we need to follow that?

2) if we dont have gate crashing, how to do the tea ceromony? We are thinking of doing it after our church, where all our relatives dismiss from the church and proceed back to individual parents' home. Then we'll go the guyz hse follows by the gal hse.

3) basically the bride will make her own way to church without the fanfair rite? Is there anything else the guy can do for the gal, except for waiting at the church?

4) Any chinese customaries stuff we need to observe for church? im quite confuse becos itz a mix of western culture but yet with chinese tradition..

5 Lastly, i hope i can hear from married couple/ or anyone who have seen others doing church wedding w/o gate crashing to tell me wat to do...

Tks!
 

coffee79

New Member
hi all,
i need friendly advice from this forum.

im celebrating my church wedding in july.. without gate crashing.

have anyone done this kind of procedures before? or have anyone seen this happening before on your friends or relatives?

if the answer is 'yes', pls advise me how to go about doing it? eg. how does the bride proceed to the church, how to conduct the tea ceromony?

tks.
 

tratties

New Member
Hi Coffee,

Its no problem having a church wedding w/out gate crashing and going back to individual parents' home for the tea ceremony, I just did it the same procedure as you mentioned for my wedding... But the only thing is that the church mass has to be early in the morning.. I had mine at 9am followed by reception @ church and then proceeded back to HB parent's place for tea ceremony and then back to mine..

FYI, I made my own way to the church with my bridesmaid in our wedding car..
 

kurera

New Member
Hi coffee, to answer your questions, you need have discussion with in law and parents side :

1. Do they have the "timing" what time they have to go back for tea ceromony? in law and parents side?

2. U need have a wedding itinerery to help facilitate the AD event.

3. What time is "press bed" (mandarin) if required?

4. What time is your am/pm church mass or service? buffet lunch of tea reception?

5. Tradition time to wake up for your dialect group?

When you got all the above, you can plan an eg as follows (my fiance not catholic so we have different timing for tea ceromony) :

6.30 : Bride wake up
7.00 : Arrival of MUA
7.30 : Arrical of jie mei
8.00 : Gate crashing
9.00 : Leave for in law place
9.45 : Reach in law place - tea ceromony
11.30 : Get ready for church
11.45 : To reach XXXX King Church
12.00 : Mass service starts
13.00 : Mass ends followed by buffet reception
13.30 : Tea ceromony with parent's side in church hall when guest leaves
14.30 : Leave for hotel / rest
1800 : Arrival of MUA
1900 : Get ready for cocktail
1930 : Wedding banquet starts
23.30 : Wedding banquet ends

FINALLY ENDED!!!

REMEMBER GET THE INFORMATION first than you can plan the itinerary in details as above is only a guide.

Hope this helps!

 

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