Any Mixed Marriages here? Esp Chinese-Malay Muslim couple

Alamak...you Girls very naughty....everytime I come in here....someone posts something new about food.....
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IC, don't play play...I'm the resident sambal goreng cook in my family (or at least I hope I can be).
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The only thing, I don't help my mom with (apart from pounding the spices the old-fashioned way) is the prawns she is famous for and what Meraj keeps asking for..

Chin, you put us malay girls to shame. Most of us have not been to Geylang I bet. I only go there to get food and cheap cushions.
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Wah..Marnie,

I agree wif u leh..i log in here..its abt food...really tempting me! *endure..endure..Lost quite a few kilos for the past 3 weeks of puasa..muz maintain liao!!

Eh..me also ..my best dish also sambal goreng...power!! + Ayam masak merah..

Chin,

really take my hat off u..3 times to Geylang bazaar! Me was only once but tat also scouting hi n lo for food to break fast..its like zoom in n out of the Geylang market within 10 mins..Really muz drag Ah Lao there liao..feels tat..if fasting month - never go Geylang - like no Raya like tat..

Ladies,

So fast hor, next week Raya aredi..well..I will be away to Seremban/Malacca to celebrate Raya this yr. will only b back on 4th day of Raya. So girls - on to come to my place for Raya gathering? May need Chin's help again..
 
IC, yup we only bought stuff like popiah (5 for $2), etc at Bussorah Street. When my parents go to Geylang, they would buy back Ramli burgers, putu piring and otak-otak. Yum yum! I really should go there so I can eat a lot of different foods!! Hahahaha.

Marnie, it's just sheer dumb luck that I managed to win anything. Wah - I really should ask my mom to pass down her recipes to me. She's got some good ones that Ah Boy always ask her to cook for him (what!).

Hui Chin, I've registered the morning class on 31 Dec (ahahahaha! what a way to end the year) and we're hoping to get married on 7 Jan.
 
Cuclainne, a good way to start a new year too, if you look at it in another way.
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Ally, on lah...I'll be there first to park meself in front on your food spread...
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I will drag Cuclainne along cos' she's my makan kaki...
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IC,

Sambal goreng is my fav lah...then now stay on my own..so muz learn lah..take from my mum's or granny's place on Hari Raya - tak cukup!

Marnie,

Like tat..muz have reservation wor..

Cuclainne,

Wah..ur planning to nikah on 7 Jan?..Tats fast!
 
Planning only - I'm not sure if I will be able to get the date because FH still haven't told me some details I would need to register the wedding ... like the hantaran and mas kahwin. Sigh sigh sigh!

This weekend I'm going to Padi Bridal and Rias Andaman to have a look at their packages and collection. Don't know if they're any good though.
 
Cuclainne,
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Don't worry. Even Meraj and I haven't talked about that one yet and we're going to register online on 17th November! The only thing that's confirmed is the mas kahwin - which is the necklace Meraj got. Phhhoooo...gold price is now S$2.95 man....Meraj bought mine slightly under S$2.00! So saved a tonne!
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IC, I've got Javanese blood lah...so must know how to cook authentic sambal goreng Javanese style. Not syiok if don't have sambal goreng...
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cuclainne,
Where did you get your wedding ring from? So will you be having "his & hers" wedding ring or just "hers" wedding ring?
 
IC, I haven't bought my ring yet - at the moment, just looking around and seeing the designs and such. Ah Boy already told me that he's allergic to wearing any rings .. I told him me too .. so now he's changed his mind and he's going to get a ring too. I don't know if we're going to get matching bands cos the ones I've seen are not really appealing to me.
 
Good morning girls,

I was busy since Monday as I have to babysit a baby for a friend. So now, the baby has gone home yesteday, so I had a great afternoon in town whizzing from place to place.

First stop was to MSG. Yeah, that place is super cool. My sis and I love the ambience and the whole set up. We spoke to the owner and went around snapping pictures. We also took pictures of the toilet. Eek. We tried their choc cake which was so delish (yes, I was not fasting la). Overall, I think this is most suitable for a semi casual event. It's a great place to eat, chill and just relax with family and friends. We'll go another day to taste their other food on the menu. The owner, Paul will revert with buffet menus via email.

Next it was to Scarlet Hotel. Whoa! Scarlet is a gem. So beautiful. So my sis and I went in to the lobby bar but unfortunately it was closed for an event that night. We decided to check out Breeze upstairs but was told it will be open till 6.30-7pm. Hmm.. we were there like 5 ish you see. Our verdict, this is a place with style and charm.. for a formal event. Be prepared to spent stylishly too. We'll definately go there again. I'd love to hold my post wedding celebration there if money isn't an onject. Cuclainne, I can tag along if you plan to go there to have a look see.

At this very moment, I have yet to conclude the makan venue for my wedding. I still have one more place to view, that is Tepak Sirih this Saturday. After that, I'll be able to decide and sign the dotted lines.

Cuclainne & Marnie
My mas kawin is a diamond wedding ring. The hubby bought it at Diamond Industries.
 
Aye......Meraj doesn't want to wear a wedding ring....but I have been psychoing him....
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We even tried a couple and he even likes one design (imagine that!) but still not decided on whether we'll exchange rings or not. Bleh....

Hi ho again Lilies. We warned you about MSG's washroom.....
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Isn't it a let down to the atmosphere and the food?
 
Cuclainne,
Oh... hmm, you know there are places whereby you can customize your own rings? I can't really remember all of them now..but i know there's this place called Fairy's Inc that can do customization as well. In fact... to your own design.

Lilies,
WAH...enjoy yourself huh? one day must really go to MSG to see the toilet. You girls have been saying it's such a turn off. I haven't been there..so must really see man! Hmm..Tepak Sireh is a nice place. But that time when i was planning for my wedding, the place haven't opened yet. I think it was officially opened on Dec 2003. So the place still pretty new.
 
IC and Ally, I am still looking around for the ring but Diamond Industries have some really nice ones which I will take a closer look at. A friend of mine has recommended me a jeweller where I could customise the rings but see how la .. sounds like so leceh unless already have a design in mind.

Hi Lilies, was wondering what you've been up to and now we know. I haven't decided when I'll be going to Scarlet to have a look - not joining the others for a pub night today. Most likely we'd settled for The Gallery Hotel near Muhd Sultan because Ah Boy likes the place (he stayed there a few days during his first trip here) and he's looking forward to staying there again - even though it will only be for one night. We don't want to party till late and have to sleep on the way home ... so we're probably going to spend the night at the venue of choice, provided it's a hotel la.

Wah - you even took photos of the washroom?? But why?? Lol. I must admit that I like the overall atmosphere but the toilet ah ... aiyoh, really turned me off la.

Marnie, did you buy the latest Pengantin magazine? The one with Rafi Ali and his wife on the cover? The white baju that was on the Rias Andaman ad looks soooo nice ... hope it'll fit me. Hahahahah!
 
Lilies,

Good to see u back here again! Wah, wedding ring from Diamond Industries wor..

When I got married, dun really like diamond rings..I was into those non-stereotyped wedding rings. Remembered looking around for a nice wedding ring, in the end we settled for a Bvlgari Bzero1 ring.

IC,

I went to MSG but no chance to peek at their toilet.Eh, like tat, we muz book a date together n see how it's like ok?
 
Wah wah wah Ally, a Bvlgari ring!!! Ah Boy asked if I wanted a ring from Cartier or Tiffany. I was like, sure or not? Then he told me that if I had said yes, let's - then he will rethink about marrying me. Wah ... so mean!!
 
Cuclainne, nope not yet. I have been sooo busy trying to keep afloat in the office whilst fighting the tonsilities, I haven't got to the newsagent to get the copies the guy keeps for me. Any interesting pictures and articles in there?

Love the sound of that Bvlgari ring, Ally!
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Cuclainne,
Oh ok.. i heard that Diamond Industries sell "value for money" kind of jewellery. It's a good buy then.

Girls,
I went to Secret Recipe again!
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Crap! Everytime i go there, sure a lot of cakes finish. What to do..can only go out at night to get it. This time i bought blackforest, baked cheesecake and banana chocolate cake (again). No other choice. These were the only ones left!
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Ally,
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You want to set date there so just to see the toilet?
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Alamak, this issue of MSG toilet very big thing. Even until lilies take photo. Can ask lilies to email the photo to all of us. Suddenly feel we become toilet investigators. I was thinking Oaks & Grill bar or Corriander leaf or Straits kitchen (problem will concentrate too much on food, have to get up to get food) or that top floor of Stamford(but too noisy) or prego or err..so many can't think already.

Wah..Bvlgari ring man! How come you don't like diamond rings? I don't really like to wear rings. But for the sake of wedding, get one lah. So how much your Bvlgari ring cost?

Marnie,
One of my hubby ex-colleague bought for the wife a Tiffany diamond ring which cost $6K. I ever went to Tiffany to look around, hmm... seems normal to me leh. Nothing the "wow" sort. Or maybe i cock-eyed?! cannot appreciate such stuffs?
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Hahahah.
 
Actually, IC, with Tiffany, you're paying for the lil' blue box. That's about it really. Their rings are beautiful but nothing we can't get outside darling. So don't have to worry, we're all normal people who will not get conned out of S$6K for an ordinary ring in a patented blue box!
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I like my ring. It's ordinary. But the fact that Meraj hunted for that perfect ring for me for 2 days to present it to me one beautiful day is enough to make me smile just looking at it's ordinary sparkles....sheeeeshh...I'm sooo cheesy, aren't I?
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Marnie,
All my hair stand when i read your posting. Cannot
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a bit huh? Okie okie..understand lah.
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You still in honeymoon period. The "period" of getting married & newly married. Very wonderful. I think i stale wife already. So all these, yucks!
Err... i can tell hubby i dun want Tiffany or the blue box etc... may as well he give me the money!
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IC,
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You are too cute doll! I lurve your emoticons - brightens my day when I read your posts!

I just got back after being at my sis' from 8am baking cookies. I'll be zonked out the entire Sunday!

And oh.....sorry doll for being too cheesy...you didn't puke, I hope!
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hi all....
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it seems this thread is very active and lively!!
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im a malay muslim (with chinese blood too) and would love to hear comments etc for all kinda wedding stuff..:D

cuclaine-i think u r also in the 'my fh is ang moh' thread eh?

can i ask if my FH converted to Islam from overseas, he has to get the conversion papers before we register marriage for ROMM? plus is it compulsory to go for the marriage prep course? has anyone gone for it, and is it helpful at all?
 
IC and Marnie, I also don't want the blue box but can I have what's inside? Lol. I went to Diamond Industries at Scotts Shopping Centre last evening and I saw a diamond ring in the shape of a square which I like. The best part is it only costs $5 more than Ah Boy's budget. Hahaha.

Waaah Marnie, I haven't even started on my baking yet. Hmm ... guess I need to get moving on that.

I went to two bridal shops yesterday with my mom. The first one I went to was a let-down. When we arrived, the shop was still closed!! The pernikahan or ROMM package is $520 (only one pair of costumes leh). She said she couldn't let us take a package (two days' service) and split it (my pernikahan is in jan, langsung in march or later) cos it might result in a loss of earnings for the mak andam.

The second one we went to was more pleasant. The ROMM package is $350 and she has another package (two pairs of costumes) for $750. But she advised us to take up the full package (4 pairs of costumes plus hand bouquet; two-days' service) for $1000 and save us the $100. She said she doesn't mind that I take one day service in Jan and the other one later (no time-limit too). And what I like the best was that she said the 4 pairs is not limited to just baju kurung/ kebaya/ etc but I can also choose a wedding gown. Most bridal shops charge extra for that. And she let me try on the clothes and shoes. I think I shall go with her .. But the one small issue I have is that she doesn't have much clothes for the M-L sized persons .. she will have to do some alterations for me but she told me not to worry, cos she's asked her tailor to do some more designs for that so when I come back I will have more choices. I guess I have to go on a diet then - I told FH and he told me that I can only lose a little, not a lot. Hahahaha. Perhaps he likes a little tummy roll then ... lol

Hi Zierella, yes I've replied to your posting on the other thread but here's good too. My FH converted last Thursday in Stockholm and the Islamic Centre will be issuing him a conversion certificate this coming week (he was telling me it's going to be soooo official because it has golden-coloured text or something - hahaha). ROMM requires you to have that conversion certificate (especially since it's from outside of Singapore) to be endorsed by MUIS before you can register marriage. In my case, it will also have to be translated cos it's in Swedish, not English.

Yes unfortunately it's necessary for you to undergo the marriage preparation course cos you will need the certificate in order to register the marriage. I have registered to attend an express class ($400 for 3-hour, English) on 31 Dec 2005 but perhaps you might want to ask Marnie how it went cos she attended one already.
 
cuclainne...which BS did u go to? I have already booked with Fatima Mohsin...any comments on this one? I thought her make up was GREAT and her costumes really nice..Anggun andaman is also good,my cousin took up packages with her and the costumes were soooooo nice! she looked great(but then again she is model material so she will look great with any mak andams hhee)

So cuclainne...how did u n FH meet?how long have u been with him?

I c, i guess i need him to get the official certificate...did ur FH change his name on his official docs ie passport etc? where r u planning to hold ur nikah? at ur house or the ROMM?

Im also trying to lose weight..im happy i lost a few inches on my thighs and tummy during puasa!! have to maintain hehehe..
 
I went to Padi and Rias Andaman, Zierella. Not too sure if I should go and look at others. Ooh ooh, Fatimah Mohsin and Anggun Andaman are nice too ... how much did you pay for your package?

I explained about the meeting up bit on the other thread ... hehehe ... but basically we met online and we've been together for about 1.5 years.

I did ask him if the Ustaz did inform him that he might need to change his name (to a Muslim one) but he said he was told that he didn't need to cos his name is already a Muslim one (Elias). He won't be changing his name on any documents but I might be taking his surname after marriage - you know, have his surname hyphened after mine. How about you?

We initially planned to hold the nikah at ROMM but after attending my cousin's do, we both decided that we wanted a smaller affair and planning to have it at home.
 
I think my FH is gonna change his middle name to Idil, which is my late grandfather's name (he is a chinese who converted to Islam)i dont know yet if and how he can change his particulars...he's gonna find out..hmm abt me taking his surname...i dont mind really but i dont think my mom will like it...sigh..

plus hey...after marriage and when u have kids, will ur kids' names have a abc bin Mohd something or just abc Elias? i understand my mom is very particular abt the bin something something cos it tells ppl we are muslims..

I think i paid abt $2300
($300 deposit) for the bridal package with 5 costumes, 2 days andaman, pelamin at home and corsage...i like her makeup...my fren engaged her for my graduation dinner and she looked really different!! (for the better of course hehe)
 
I don't think my parents are too concerned about me taking on his surname as long as I stay true to my roots.

Hahahaha - don't laugh but my FH has a rather long name ... three first names and a surname. But he prefers to be called Elias Mårtensson and that's the name he'll be going by in the marriage/ conversion cert. So our kids will have Swedish and Malay names followed by his surname. Kinda like my nephew - he has a Malay/ English name followed by his Dad's surname.

Wow! That's a lot of dough, Zierella for a bridal package but i'm sure it'll all be worth it - especially for a once-in-a-lifetime event.
 
Welcome welcome Zierella!
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Tell us tell us about your intended...and your intended wedding..I bet the makcaik makcik (including moi here who's in "training") want to know all about it...
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Cuclainne, cool!!! aiyah...S$5.00 more than Ah Boy's budget then you pay lah.......but not before you tell him you're keeping a bit of your tummy roll for him...that'll make him think twice about you paying the S$5.00 more....
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Which BS is that? It is cheap seeing the change of clothes and letting you have a few months in between in one package. Mine also let me do that (the photoshoot and the wedding) and I get the wedding gown (MTM to boot!) in my package.

I'm lugging Meraj to Geylang one these days to get a pair of capal for the wedding since it's only going to cost S$20.00 for one day's usage! (The BS will not provide the capal)..
 
cuclainne,
Wah...your Ah boy lucky lah. Budget only above $5. Luckily $5..if not he'll probably
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if add another 3 zeros.
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zierella,
My baby have bin "hubby's muslim name". Yes, in one way tell ppl that we're muslims. But crap! When i bring my baby to polyclinic, they think it's one of my son's chinese name. Wat duh.. and those uneducated chinese "laugh" a bit when they see my son's name and the race. To them it's "zhen zi quai.."
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Whateverlah..i classify them as cheena bukit.

Your price of the bridal package is similar to chinese bs price. But consider it, malay have more lah coz 2 days. Chinese only 1 day. so worth the price.

Marnie,
I didn't puke. I
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when i read your post. Luckily i didn't eat my secret recipe cake. If not, my poor cake would have probably fly from the plate.

I suppose to go Geylang Serai today to walk-walk and see-see the bazaar. On top of that, probably buy my baby's 1st baju kurung. But in the end, so tired after breaking of fast... so, probably shall go on deepavali instead. Coz still contemplating whether to let baby wear the baju kurung or not. If he wears, probably only for photo session during morning. After that change, coz it'll be too hot for him. He sweats a lot.
 
Hi Girls!

Was bz over the weekend with housework..phew! spring cleaning - no big joke!

Marnie

Tats true, getting a Tiffany ring was really out of the question for me - c'mon, for a normal silver ring already cost a few hundred bucks (actually some goes to 1k), wat more a white gold /platinum ring?

IC,

7 yrs back..diamond ring was like - "duh! too flashy for me.." N I was looking for something different. Anyway, my Bvlgari ring was quite affordable at tat time. We got the simple 3 tier ring which cost $900 each.. Now I heard the same ring cost abt $1200. Was aiming for the 5 tier ring but hubby wasn't keen abt it. Anyway, I got a matching pendant to go along with it lah. Only catch is the ring is 18k yellow gold..the colour is SOOO out of fashion now..thinking of asking hubby to change the ring to white gold but alas..kena knock at the head liao..

Shd get one small baju kurung for ur son..bet he will look sooooo cute on Hari Raya.

Hi Zierella

Welcome!

Cuclainne,

$5.00 above the budget, sure can lah..think ur Ah Boy won't mind it. juz give him a wide smile n blink your eyes abit..sure he will grab that ring for u!
 
haha...ic: whoa...u din go today..i did! think this is my <blink>5th</blink> time going down to Geylang bazaar!! oh man! haha...break record liaoz,...over the past few yrs! haha...but was a short one though, just pop by to meet my bf and his frens..heh

Cuclainne: whoa...haha..i know its abit weird to reply to u like now...abit slow here...din have chance to checxk the posts till now. heh..sooo...u are most likely to get married by 7Jan next yr. Got such a short time to prepare! lol..jiayou! how izzit going? heh..

Girls:...abt the 'diamond ring' issue...me feel most sua guu here...ermm...for most of us here, where does the 'ring' comes in? Like i heard some is 'there' during the 'proposal', while others are in the 'hantaran'. What abt the exchanging of rings? what needs to be exchanged? Cos i've been to many weddings..but i certainly dun see the 'actual' ceremony that often. Am i correct? Did i miss out anything? And how can i define 'Mas Kahwin'? whoa...i feel like a blur sotong..hmm..lol
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Ally: whoa...holiday-spending raya outta S'pore! Shiokers! haha...enjoy urselves k! Yea, will definitely arrange a day to go for visiting at ur house! hehe...
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Girls:, i think i've hit a plateau...like i totally stopped doing anything for my wedding preparations - caz it's sooo far away! early 2007..or am i panicking too early liaoz? Just feel that i'm like, slacking, and dunno what 2 do next! Arghhh
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Hui Chin

I got a ring for my engagement - so called the proposal ring. It depends on the individual couple - some got a ring during engagement so they find that getting another ring would be redundant. Thus, they will get other alternatives. But for my case, my engagement ring was a diamond ring..which I find it's not feasible for daily usage n at tat time iwas so against diamond rings, so hubby n I agreed on getting a simple wedding ring.

During the nikah ceremony, usually the wedding ring will be among the hantaran. Some will use the ring as mas kahwin, like me, my mas kahwin was $100 cash. The wedding ring was part of my Si Dian Jin. Normally the malays will say it as "serba satu" which means a set of jewellery for the bride. The exchange of the wedding ring will take after the Nikah session.

I got this excerpt from the internet -
Akad Nikah

Marriage is a contract, and the akad nikah effectively forges the union. The solmnization is normally presided by a kadhi, a religious official of the Syariat (Shariat) Court. In olden days, it was customary for the bride's biological father to perform this function. The akad nikah ceremony is in effect a verbal contract between the bride's father or his representative (in this case the kadhi) and the groom. A small sum of money called the mas kahwin (in Singapore, it is S$22.50 as of 1998) seals the contract. The dialogue is as follows, and must be articulated clearly as to be heard by three witnesses:

Kadhi: I marry thee to (so-and-so) with the mas kahwin of S$22.50

Groom: I accept this marriage with (so-and-so) with the mas kahwin of S$22.50

The simplicity of this ritual belies the tremendous responsibilities of the groom to care for his bride, and this is reinforced in a brief lecture on marriage and its responsibilities delivered later by the kadhi. The groom is also reminded that, should he fail to provide both spiritual and physical sustenance for his wife, the marriage may be dissolved if a complaint is made to the Syariat Court.

One needs to distinguish the mas kahwin and the hantaran (dowry). The small sum of the mas kahwin is to ensure that even poor people could marry, for marriage is encouraged for all healthy Muslims. The hantaran, on the other hand, is more customary and may go into thousands of dollars. Often, the hantaran takes the form of both cash and jewelry or clothing.

The istiadat hantar belanja (sending of dowry and gifts) and upacara akad nikah (solemnization) often take place at the bride's place. The recent trend, though, is to hold the solemnization in the mosque as was performed during the Prophet Muhammad's (saws) time. The solemnization is usually conducted by the kadhi (marriage official) in front of witnesses after both partners are asked separately if they consent to the marriage. Gifts are then exchanged and there may be a recitation of the Quran.

Gifts from the groom are checked to ensure that they are as promised. They will then be displayed in the bridal chamber. Gifts of clothes, toiletries and even prayer mats (to signify their adherence to the religion) are presented in intricate boxes or forms known as gubahan.
 
Ally: Whoa...now i get it liaoz...so actually it depends on the individual rite...heh.. really appreciate the help of the proper definition of these issues...caz i've always been confused by soo many things..haha
 
Huichin,
Just to add, you can go to http://app.romm.gov.sg/internet/index.asp to find out more. And the mas kahwin now, 2005 minimum is $100 cash. No longer $22.50 hor. As for my case, my wedding ring is used as part of my hantaran(dowry). My mas kahwin is a pearl necklace.
I didn't get any ring for my hubby. (coz customarily not necessary for the woman to get for the man) After the nikah, my hubby put on the ring and pearl necklace for me.

Salute you man!
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I haven't even been once to walk around. You already 5 times.

Ally,
WAH ....
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But oklah..consider worth paying the price. 18K Gold. Eh, during war time, that one got value eh! i didn't get any wedding bands. Coz during that time i was very fussy.So i told hubby it's ok lah... anyway, i don't like to put on rings. So didn't get any wedding band. So he just bought for me those loose diamond from Hearts on Fire, During my time, it was brought in by Aspial. Then, we make it to a ring. Eh, want to kena
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, your wedding band also want to change to suit fashion now? Of course lah hubby sure hit the roof... that's sentimental "original" present you know.. kekeke....
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I still contemplating the baju kurung part coz baby currently having heat rash at armpit.
 
Marnie, hahahaha - if I tell him that, perhaps he might tell me that it's ok to go above the budget a bit more huh? Lol.

It was Rias Andaman who quoted me that. The owner was very nice too .. so I'm inclined towards signing up with her. But perhaps I should still scout around since I still have time, regardless of how little it might actually be. Hahaha.

Oh yes, must go and get that ... but perhaps Ah Boy might prefer wearing shoes instead. He can't go without his socks. $20 for the capal? That is cheap. I think my sister paid more for that at Arab Street.

IC, you should definitely get one for your son. So so cute. My nephew is wearing one - he wore one last year too and he was too cute. Must wear, must wear ... little kiddies wear baju kurung is very very nice.

Ally, you can't blink blink at your hubby to get him to change the ring to white gold?? Actually my engagement ring is also 18K ... Ah Boy told me that white gold is actually gold but just plated 'white' so what's the point? Sigh ... I prefer white gold lor but since he already say like that, what else can I do?

Hui Chin, I understand what you mean la - sometimes I just feel like giving up the planning too. Sometimes just too much of a headache to think of pleasing soo many people too but never mind, one day at a time. Like Ah Boy said, it's supposed to be fun ... but when it isn't, then you know you should take a break lor.
 
Hi Everyone!! this thread realli happening
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its very active
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Well, Marnie, me and my FH will be having the solemnization here, tog with dinner and lunch! (VERY ex man!) actually i wanted to do it sat and sun but my mom said have to do it over three days cos ppl who cant come on sun will have to come on sat nite so cannot have dinner on sat!! ughh which means more $$$ on video and photography..!!

Im planning to do lunch at Orchid country club and dinner most prob at British club (not confirmed, but only for abt 11 tables for really close frens) solemnization most prob at home on fri...

My Fh's family members cant fly over cos both his grandad and mom are afraid of flying (esp long distance) so we are gonna have a small reception in the US after the wedding over here!! planning to do it outdoor there by the lake (sounds so romantic, cos can never do outdoor in spore cos of the heat)

As u can c, very VERY ex! heheh my poor FH has to scrimp and save hehe,

Huichin: Wow 5 times!!! I went only once and i cannot tahan already...the crowd and the jostling and hustling just turned me off man!! Luckily i got my costume at AC Bugis already if not got nothing to wear on first day heheh

IC: wah the mas kahwin price shoot up already huh!!

Can i ask: am i rite to say that the hantaran is a gift for the bride's parents and the $ is used to be spent on the wedding? So if got extra money leftover, the parents keep, if more they(bride's parents) have to fork out? plus all the 'hongbao's' that we get onthe actual wedding day who keeps the money? So confusing man!
 
Cuclainne,

I blink, blink also no use..overuse on him liao..Actually, i'm not very keen on getting a yellow gold ring..but then you knowlah, old ppl..they thot if the wedding band and jewellery set are in white gold..aiya! they will think that it is silver..

IC,
My wedding band is the oustanding feature on my body rite now..all other accessories in white gold except for THIS particular ring on my left hand!
 
Zierella,

Abt dowry, i guess it's up to different families. For my case, my dowry is for my personal keeping, whereas the ang pao money all given to my parents to cover for the cost.

For my elder bro's case, his PIL keeps both the dowry n ang pao money. On our side, my parents gave him half of the ang pao money.

Mayb u can check with IC on hers..
 
Zierella, it's true what Ally says. I'll be keeping my dowry but since my parents will be footing the bill for the lunch (they wanted to), they'll be keeping the angpao money from that la.

Aiyoh Marnie, so paiseh yesterday leh. I was talking to Ah Boy on the phone about the nikah and such .. then he passed the phone to his mother (she happened to be at his place). She asked me which event is more important for her to attend because she's afraid of flying ... but for our sake, she will attempt this once. That is also why I would prefer to have everything done at once - so she could see it all but Ah Boy wants some time so his friends can arrange to come. Sigh. Anyways, after explaining to her and all, she told me to go to bed cos it's close to 1am. Wah - like my mommy ... I felt so paiseh.
 
Zierella,
<font color="ff0000">Culturally for the malays</font>: the bride side have their own reception. Groom side have their own reception and respective parents pay for it. So the respective parents keep the angbao. Yes, the duit hantaran is to be used for the expenditure of the bride's reception because the akad nikah usually takes place at the bride's home and also to prepare for the bedroom. Usually the bride will be in the bedroom when the akad nikah takes place. So the bedroom must be nicely decorated. Usually also new furniture. So that money is to cover that expenditure also. Orang melayu kata, "Pengantin perempuan mesti siapkan bilik pengantin." The hantaran (gifts) are usually shared among family members or respective bride / groom. For eg..the wedding cake, chocolates or other sweet stuffs are shared among relatives. Gifts like handbag, make-up etc..is for the bride. And vice versa depending on what you buy for your FH. Clear?

<font color="ff0000">Modern version</font>: Nowadays bride / groom pay for the expenditure of the wedding. So the parents only come to look pretty, shake hands with guests and enjoy. In this case, it's better for the bride / groom to keep angbao isn't it? Coz they can use that money to cover for the expenditure. The duit hantaran, you still have to prepare the "bilik pengantin." and the akad nikah. So if you have leftover, it's up to the parents whether they want to take the money or give it back to the bride / groom. Clear?

<font color="ff0000">My version</font>: Groom paid for all the expenditure. So groom keep all the angbaos to cover the wedding expenditure. The duit hantaran was given to my parents. But my parents gave ALL of it back to me. They said they don't need it and ask me to use for my honeymoon expenditure.

Ally,
Eh, how come when i meet you, i never took noticed of that wedding band huh? Alamak... blind lah me. See lah..this is what happens when you bring along your baby. You should have tell me it's Bvlgari man...i sure want to see!
lol.gif


Cuclainne,
wah...such nice MIL. So hard to find this kind of MIL. Anyway, angmoh mah..so understandlah. Angmoh MIL usually kinder.
 


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