Need advise as i really felt complicated at it

[confusegirlx3]

Dear all,

I would like to ask as I wanted to divorce with my husband as we both have a toddler is at age of 4 years old as she will be 5 years old next year. As the currently HDB Flat is purchase by my husband name and he placed me & my child under occupied as he didn't pay for my child school fees,decoration of the flat that's our place and he took my wedding jewellery and pawn it away due to he gamble last year and he told me that he will get back all the jewellery of mine that he bring to pawn to the shop. As i didn't see anything at all.

**Noted as i want to fight with him is only the flat & i want my child.**


Please kindly advise me and tell me how am i going to about.?

 

[susiesusanto]

ermm.. why not go for counselling instead? there is a reason you guys got married in the first place, don't just quit the marriage because you guys are going through a rough patch, eventhough it is a very rough one. just a thought, pls ignore if it doesn't sound right to you.

 

[cheesecakefan123]

For emotional issues , go for counselling.
But if the assets and custody matter, gotta seek lawyer advice, there are pro bono services around

 

[confusegirlx3]

ermm.. why not go for counselling instead? there is a reason you guys got married in the first place, don't just quit the marriage because you guys are going through a rough patch, eventhough it is a very rough one. just a thought, pls ignore if it doesn't sound right to you.

As we went for counselling before he stick to listen to his relatives, eg; his aunty can say till i outside having affair this and that plus i'm working.

 

[Infernolord]

As we went for counselling before he stick to listen to his relatives, eg; his aunty can say till i outside having affair this and that plus i'm working.

No one should judge another person but sad to say, in this world, ppl judge you based on your behaviors.
His aunty mabe too nasty to judge you and even added oil to the fire. However I think you shld also think why his aunty say that, is it some behaviors that you did ?
Having said that, since you aldy decide divorce. You shld not be bother by all these remarks and you shld also take some time to reflect on this marriage so that your next rs will be better.
Again, the only person that suffer the most is your kid. Think twice for all your actions.. be it quarrels or divorce.. your kid will go thru with you and see all these.

 

[confusegirlx3]

No one should judge another person but sad to say, in this world, ppl judge you based on your behaviors.
His aunty mabe too nasty to judge you and even added oil to the fire. However I think you shld also think why his aunty say that, is it some behaviors that you did ?
Having said that, since you aldy decide divorce. You shld not be bother by all these remarks and you shld also take some time to reflect on this marriage so that your next rs will be better.
Again, the only person that suffer the most is your kid. Think twice for all your actions.. be it quarrels or divorce.. your kid will go thru with you and see all these.

i understand as i had enough of all the nonsense. As i can say his aunty just like to add oil to fire. she just always think she is the right one who can judge us and started complaining about my parents and drag all those people who are related to me. Even if i don't know the person she will also drag the person name in.
So as we separated staying from each other it has been 4 years coming up years will be 5 years.

As my last option is still divorce as i just want to know whether could i purchase the flat back from HDB.

 

[confusedchild82]

First of all, have you guys been separated for more than 4yrs? If yes, you can file for divorce straight away, back dating to the date you have first separated. Getting the interim and final should be within 6mths unless he contest it. However, ancillary and alimony are 2 different issues.
2ndly, are you currently working? do you have enough means to buy over his share of the house? Since MOP of 5yrs is up, your husband will be able to sell the HDB to open market, that way both of you will get more profit from the sales, as such, I believe he will want to opt for selling to open market, unless you are able to pay him a substantial amt of money to buy over his share.
Just inform yr lawyers the terms you would like to propose to him.
If he is not agreeable to your terms, there is nothing the court can do as well. So either you have a proper discussion with him and sound out what he intend to do about the HDB first and decide what is more feasible for both of you.

 

[life_is]

i understand as i had enough of all the nonsense. As i can say his aunty just like to add oil to fire. she just always think she is the right one who can judge us and started complaining about my parents and drag all those people who are related to me. Even if i don't know the person she will also drag the person name in.
So as we separated staying from each other it has been 4 years coming up years will be 5 years.

As my last option is still divorce as i just want to know whether could i purchase the flat back from HDB.

If you haven't stayed with each other throughout the marriage, what is there to save? Why didn't you stay together as a family?

 

[confusegirlx3]

If you haven't stayed with each other throughout the marriage, what is there to save? Why didn't you stay together as a family?

we had some complicated case as we are not suit to be staying together.

 

[confusegirlx3]

First of all, have you guys been separated for more than 4yrs? If yes, you can file for divorce straight away, back dating to the date you have first separated. Getting the interim and final should be within 6mths unless he contest it. However, ancillary and alimony are 2 different issues.
2ndly, are you currently working? do you have enough means to buy over his share of the house? Since MOP of 5yrs is up, your husband will be able to sell the HDB to open market, that way both of you will get more profit from the sales, as such, I believe he will want to opt for selling to open market, unless you are able to pay him a substantial amt of money to buy over his share.
Just inform yr lawyers the terms you would like to propose to him.
If he is not agreeable to your terms, there is nothing the court can do as well. So either you have a proper discussion with him and sound out what he intend to do about the HDB first and decide what is more feasible for both of you.

I ask the HDB as they say if you have the child custody the house will goes to you automatic don't need worry as you need worry part is to pay back him the share of his CPF have pay-out for the house.

 

[DingOOPS]

How the house will be allocated will be according to the instructions on the final court order. (It will state whether the house will be retained or the house needs to be sold to the open market by a certain date)

If you have the care and control / custody of the child, you will be able to form a family nucleus with your child. Thus you will be eligible to own / purchase a flat from HDB.

If you get the house, you will have to pay back his CPF contributions by topping up his CPF account and he will transfer his share of the house to you accordingly. (How much is his share of the house depends on the outcome of the final court order)

If you are unable to buy over his share of the flat, the flat will have to be sold to the open market and the profits will be distributed accordingly to the proportions stated in the final court order.

You may approach HELP Family Service Centre for more assistance. It's an agency that specifically helps single parent families. Telephone: 64575188