[Help] Divorcing within 2 years into marriage along with a child

ManWithChild

New Member
Hi,

I'm into less than 2 years of marriage and have a child now as well.

My wife and myself have been constantly quarreling over differences on family values, financial matters and our child's upbringing.

I'm confident to say that I've been a dutiful father and husband who plans for the family, but it has been increasingly difficult to live with my wife, who has been unreasonable.

My day always starts with a quarrel with her and she leaves for work, leaving me with the child, whom I ferry to and fro to the infant care everyday, 15mins drive away from home.

It has been terrible living with this woman who incessantly wants money for allowance and even inculcates values of my child having another property, which technically belongs to my parents now.

I have been planning and paying for nearly all expenses of the family including the current house that we are living in.

While we are sick, my parents will come all the way from the other side of the island to look after our child and she criticizes them despite all the help rendered.

Just last night, she was complaining about my parents coming over too often, when it is hardly ever so. This is especially disheartening knowing that my parents feed, wash, clothe my child while she was sick.

I go over to my in-laws place every Mon-Fri, because my wife insists on eating her mum's food and she says I'm a disgusting person who eats off his in-laws. My parents and my accommodating attitude towards her has has been reciprocated with insults and unappreciative gestures not infront but behind whoever's back that she's complaining about.

My family is now behind me now that I'm making this tough decision after deliberating for several months. I come from a family who puts family values highly but it is getting impossible to live with my wife. My family sees the suffering and only wants happiness for me and my child.

How do I annul the marriage and get custody of my child since it's still within 2 years of ROM?
 


magaz

Member
Hi ManWithChild

You can get some information at http://www.lawsociety.org.sg/forPublic/YoutheLaw/Divorce.aspx

It has information on both annulment (also known as Nullity) and Divorce for starters. It is also advisable that you speak to a lawyer.

For your case, it does not seem that you qualify for Nullity (Annulment) as it has the following 'requirements'/conditions:

  • if at the time of your marriage, your 'spouse' is already married;
  • your "spouse" has refused to consummate the marriage;
  • the marriage has not been consummated because you or your 'spouse' is incapable of consummating it;
  • if at the time of your marriage, your 'spouse' is suffering from venereal disease and you are not aware of this.
(The above grounds are not exhaustive).
You may need to apply for Divorce instead, and start your three (if consent given) or four years (without consent) separation from now. Do speak to a lawyer to find out more.
Take care.
 

xellos

Member
You cannot do annulment because you already had sex with your husband. Annulment is for those who havent. You can file for divorce
 

xellos

Member
On custody:- You child is most likely be given to your wife, unless you caught her cheating or fufill the basic 5 rules of divorce. Good Luck
 

sharingNcaring101

New Member
Hi,

I'm into less than 2 years of marriage and have a child now as well.

My wife and myself have been constantly quarreling over differences on family values, financial matters and our child's upbringing.

I'm confident to say that I've been a dutiful father and husband who plans for the family, but it has been increasingly difficult to live with my wife, who has been unreasonable.

My day always starts with a quarrel with her and she leaves for work, leaving me with the child, whom I ferry to and fro to the infant care everyday, 15mins drive away from home.

It has been terrible living with this woman who incessantly wants money for allowance and even inculcates values of my child having another property, which technically belongs to my parents now.

I have been planning and paying for nearly all expenses of the family including the current house that we are living in.

While we are sick, my parents will come all the way from the other side of the island to look after our child and she criticizes them despite all the help rendered.

Just last night, she was complaining about my parents coming over too often, when it is hardly ever so. This is especially disheartening knowing that my parents feed, wash, clothe my child while she was sick.

I go over to my in-laws place every Mon-Fri, because my wife insists on eating her mum's food and she says I'm a disgusting person who eats off his in-laws. My parents and my accommodating attitude towards her has has been reciprocated with insults and unappreciative gestures not infront but behind whoever's back that she's complaining about.

My family is now behind me now that I'm making this tough decision after deliberating for several months. I come from a family who puts family values highly but it is getting impossible to live with my wife. My family sees the suffering and only wants happiness for me and my child.

How do I annul the marriage and get custody of my child since it's still within 2 years of ROM?

I suggest you look at the woman's charter. If you want to have the custody over your child, you will face a contest by your wife (If she wants the child). What I understand is that as long as the child in below 10 years old, under the woman's charter the custody is automatic goes to her. My brother-in-law waited for his son reach 11 then he file a divorce.
 

jendome

Active Member
Usually is Joint custody.. Unless u can proof that ur wife will ill-treat the child...
U cant annul the marriage. Divorce is the only way
 

Mrs Yeo

Member
Hi,

These r just my 5 cents worth of comments.

Have a good chat w yr wife..ur suffering but she may not hv noticed it or taking things for granted.

Talk things out. Is she having post natal blues or suffering from depression or anxiety probs?

Or she has been behaving this way since day 1 when u met her?

People dun change overnight unless she has been putting up a front all these years before marriage.

Have a good talk aka 'thrashing things' out. Let her know how bad she makes u feel, how sad n tired u are n how yr parents r feeling.

Bite the bullet n hear her perspectives too.

She may be taking things for granted or having issues w coping w the child n work at the same time.

There may be many underlying reasons to her tantrum n your quiet sufferings.

It is not easy to stay committed in a marriage esp when we see the ugliest side of our spouse.

Think things through n try to salvage yr marriage. It is not just about u n yr wife now but a child is involved here. This is a family.

Dun be rash into thinking abt divorce even before having a good talk w yr wife.

My apology if im not helping here.

Take care of yrself n yr baby.
 

lemonzil

Member
even if it's the woman who's committing adultery, not working, the custody still goes back to her rather than her husband?
 

lbk

New Member
hi, sorry to sidetrack here. my wife wants the full custody of our child, i agree to her terms. is it possible we propose to the court out decision or depends on the court?
 

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