Christian Brides

Twinkle dearie,
How much did u pay to do the Taylor Johnson test and where did u do it? My church didn't offer it and the TOUCH course recommended tt we try the test
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Hui,
I think PMC was fantastic! In terms of letting u know more abt each other and how to resolve issues etc. Learnt so much from it and would definitely recommend it to frens
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Hey Ivy and girls,
Just did my yesterday too! Thank God for the fine weather! It must have been the brightest and sunniest day this week
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It was great fun! Tiring but fantastic! Was walking ard Joo Chiat and the east area in my WG and so many pple were looking. And my hair had a ton of hairspray in it to keep it up i had to wash it a few times...

And my PG and MUA agreed that Kim's CS were very very stunning! Will tell Kim when i next see her heh
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hi all,

Am new here too!~ Chanced upon this site and really felt God speaking thru you all. Reminding me to take baby steps at a time and to fully trust in HIM! Praise God! Can't help initially to keep worrying abt finances and if things will turn out well or not, etc, etc. But having read thru all yr encouragement, I felt *renewed* and yes, let us all place our faith in him! Amen!
 
Count dear, haven't seen you around lately! Must be busy at work and PS eh?

We paid $60 for the tj test. It was administered by my church. Think they bought a number of sets for MPC use. If you are interested lemme know and I'll see whether i can help.
 
hello everyone!!

eh, how come everyone knows its for meet the paretns ah? I post in other threads also.. and everyone theres like "ribbons, for our parents session... " I never mention parents.. hee.. they want lunch leh.. like, proper food... mehmeh" i tried exclesior b4, but at lunch time they only have dim sum..
twinkle: That one check liao... too ex.

corsage: thank u for that suggestion... will go check it out..

Daning: wow... praise God!! dont know you but i'm really happy for u... =)

Ivy and count: PS very fun hor... i think i also washed my hair like 3 times, and next few days still a bit hard.. hee...

Hui: I did my PMC at barker road and did the PREPARE test.. me hor, actually very scared to go for PMC, cos thought it will reveal how incompatible we are.. but we really benefitted from the test.. yes, it did show us the areas in which we have differing views, but what\ was more shocking was that it showed us that we actually agree on many areas.. and it was very helpful to have the counsellor on hand to help us with the areas that\we disagree on.. and i really benefitted from the topics taught.. i'm a social worker and i am taught most of such things, eg. family of origin issues, etc. and i thought it would be more for my FH, since i knew it already... but attending it with my FH helped us understand it together, and hearing views from the other couples really gave me alot of new insight onto these topics that i thought i knew already..

i strongly encourage PMC... christian or non christian.. should go for it..

and the different tests, there really isnt a very good or very zun one, all have their good points cos they lead to self awareness and awareness of ur partner.. no matter which test, they help u realise things u've never thought about.. important thing is that u have a person whos trained to interpret and give suggestions to cope with differing views...
 
hi ribbons...

i saw one of ur posts at Hommage Furniture.. I went last Sun & placed my orders today after taking some measurements at the unit today.

Stuff are cheaper than the usual stores, and those u see in the usual stores are all China-made. This guys bring in fr China but u do save $100-300 per piece.. Worth checking them out, esp coz they have the 0% installment with UOB, DBS & one other bank.. The downside, they dun have a show room to display items for u to browse

hi Ivy & Count,

Praise God for great weather & fun PS!
Ivy: hahah, was ur boi cooperative? It's so memorable to inc ur boi
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heheh
What's the status of ur WG?

Count: U loved Kim's CS? Realised tt i had intro a no. of ppl fr my service to her & they also love her works!!

hi Jaspire & Kessymeow,

Welcome!!!
 
Hi Ribbons, now you get me thinking maybe we've met before. I am a social worker too. :D Yea I totally agree with you that knowing how to help people with issues and experiencing them is a totally different matter altogether.
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I've also benefited a lot from PMC!
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Hi all, I have a question, my F-FIL is a non-christian and he had remarried in 1999 and his current wife is not well-liked by everyone. I met her about 6 mths ago as they were on a verge or getting a divorce and then they patched back again. I am having issues to "serve tea" to her, I don't feel comfortable. My SO is also not comfortable serving tea to her, but it seems like we cannot "run away" not serving tea to her. I feel very hyprocritical if I am serving tea to her as my FMIL when she had done nothing to bring my husband up nor took part in his life. We dated for 2 years and she was not in the picture until 6+ mths ago .. I have not even met her daughters (Step-SIL), it is just so werid.

Husband to be is telling me to do it for the sake of doing the tea ceremony, it is not important, it's just a tradition, the important part is we will be saying our vows to God.

Anyone with similar experience to share or advise how I approach this?

Our parents are meeting tomorrow to talk about the wedding stuff - like traditions, etc, the pig legs, Guo Da Li and the Si Dian Jing.
Please pray for an eventful day.

FIL's wife is very unreasonable, so I really hope she don't go for the dinner, but we asked one of FIL's sister to join us (as she had done this before when she married her daughter off) to "balance" out the issues may happen.

I am currently very stressed out over this, I just gave the wedding invites to the parents, for them to send out to those "pang tan" relatives before the 7th month and then tomorrow's event.
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Hmm... that's quite a tough situation. Need lots of prayer.

Is your FH's birth mum going to be around for the tea ceremony? I would think it would be awkward if there were two 'mums' in that sense. But your FH's step mum seems like she intends to turn up for the ceremony. And even though you have only known her for 6 months, I suppose your FH has lived in the same house as her for more than 5 years? So I think he would feel obliged to serve her tea.

Hope the meeting tomorrow goes well, so sorry not really in a position to advise cos no experience on this. But ultimately if it were me, I'd just go ahead with serving tea rather than create unnecessary unhappiness...
 
Hi count, mind sharing a picture of your cs with me? I m thinking of getting kim to tailor a tea dress for me but i hv no idea yet..how much did u spend on ur cs-workmanship plus fabric?
 
Twinkle, FH did not lived in the same house as step mom, he could not tahan her and moved out after 6mths - 1 yr and then he was posted overseas.

FH's birth mom passed away 10 yrs ago, that is why FFIL re-married. It is very hard for me to do things that I do not "mean", we don't want to serve tea to her and I don't visualise or take her as a MIL, so I am really
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if we have to do it.
 
hi panic,

Hmm, i think u shd follow ur husband's intentions & plans... If ur FH is against it, then u shd also concurr with him.

At the same time, we got to remember tt when we get married, we get a new family, whether we like it anot. I'm sure u also want FFIL to be happy, tt u are trying to accept ur F-step-MIL. It's not easy, but must also understand fr pt of view of ur FFIL too
 
hey ribbons

yups, PS was really fun
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We even told the PG that we were there for fun. So, we were building rapport and giggling along the way, cracking jokes and getting to know the PG. Machiam long-lost friends.

Mehmeh

Shem (my boi) was very co-operative in the studio. But when he came out, he was like 'I am finally out to have fun', was a little harder to control then. but all was fine, especially the lovely weather.
 
panic mode: thinking from another perspective, how would it be like if u didnt serve your FMIL? Wait guest who are around see u as a infilial DIL how? Even though most of them dont like her too.. to you maybe u dont see the need to serve tea to her, but she's still considered ur hubby's step mother lah.. so she still deserves that bit of respect?
Just for thoughts lah..

but above all, pray about it k..

Ivy: ur boi so cute... hee... hope u got some nice shots of him in ur pics..

hey, anyone ate at Wah Loke restaurant before? Carlton hotel... hows the food hows the price?
 
hi ivy,

tt's so nice.. gd boy! *pats* Hmm, when can u view ur pix for selection??

hi ribbons,

hmm, never been there leh.. U want to try Makan Sutra website? Prob more hits there to give u any idea
 
ribbons: that is what my bf said, he does not want people to judge us becos we are christians. So he wants to do it to show that we are gracious in that perspective - but he wun like it but he will do it.

My problem is - that is so insincere. why want to fake the respect when I really do not like her.

I really appreciate all your messages. It's alot to do with face, respect and I guess humility. I think I would serve the tea if my bf is serving.

I need to remember, Jesus came to be a servant to us and as christians we have to be growing in the likeness of him.

Thanks everyone for replying - I think I have came to a conclusion. I will serve tea and be meek.
 
PM

while man looks at our actions, God looks at our heart.

There are many issues that are beyond our control, just as this need to serve tea to your FHb's Step-mum. But I just want to encourage you that while you are doing it, 'do it unto The Lord, and not unto man'.

Cos ultimately, all that we do ought to be pleasing to God and to bear good testimony for Him, so that others will praise God, isn't it?
 
hey panic mode... yah lor.. a lot of times we may not like what we are doing.. but we also have to be a testimony.. so dont think of it as your are being insincere in faking respect for her.. think of it as in you are being sincere in trying to be a good testimony and try to show respect for your 'elders'?
 
hi ivy,

must stick to a budget, dun overspend k? can save and use the money for honeymoon

hi panic,

u're most welcome! Do hope u're feeling encouraged! Pray with ur FH to have tt servanthood u 2 want to have for ur family
 
Ivy, Ribbons, thanks so much for your encouragement. I had been praying about this and talking with you ladies here, had made me understand it is not about the tea ceremony, it's more of humility and also things had to be done in a certain way and I should respect it. Just like John the baptist had baptised Jesus. I spoke to my bf and we both agree it is not the the traditions, to us, to be married in the house of God is all that matters, the rest are thing to be done to pacify the Parents.

Children obey the parents, in this case, I believe FIL would want us to serve tea to his current wife so we will do it. After that we will go to Mt Vernon to visit my FH's mother. We have that sorted out and that is the plan.

Tonight's meeting went rather eventfully, FIL wanted banquet but we both refuse, he was still rather sore. He asked my parents about it, my mum said now a days young people like to do it their way. It's their marriage so ok lor.

Praise God for this successful meeting. Step FMIL was "ok" today, which is good. My dad got along with my FIL and F uncle in law, so it was great.

I am just so thankful everything went without hiccup. It also made me look at things differently and I also realized that our purpose is to Glorify God and make him happy.

Thanks for replying.
 
hey panicmode... good for u!!

Yeah, all these traditions is to let the parents be at rest.. not for us..

Just to share my testimony of GOd's goodness, FPIL are not saved, so they wanted to do all those checking of dates and times.. fh and i are fine with it. we choose our dates that we want, we let them check. cos whatever the alamanac or what the stars says, it doesnt matter. i look to the One who made those stars.. We committed it to GOd, we told God to let things work out, and to le it be a good day. why i pray that? So that we can get married on the date of our choice and the parents are happy and closed case. 2nd hurdle was when they wanted to check timing.. this one a bit more tricky, cos fh and i stay quite far away from each other, and we already have the AD itenary planned out, so if the timin clash with ours, dont know how lor.. (but his mother was nice, she knows we have to be in chruch by a certain time to prepare). So we commiitted this to GOd again, asking God to take charge, to let the timing work out. And thank GOd, the timing works with our initial itenary!!

the idea in al these wedding preps, traditions, family is... to commit it all to GOd.. =)

yiippee! so excited, this saturday i going to select pictures!! hope dont kena 'corrupted' by the sales girl into taking too many pics...
 
Ribbons, I felt peace after making the decision and it is the right one. I am blessed to have a understanding FH and we both agree on the important stuff - Glorfiy God, so that puts us into perspective. Yes, commit it to God. I felt peace after that.

I am getting married end of Sept, so tons of stuff needs to be done before that, mainly for the non-believer relatives. Both FFIL and Step MIL are non-believers so it is good that FIL compromised for us - it's all God's grace.

Have fun in your photo selection!!
 
Yeah... can identify with u on that.. me and fh are belivers, my side is too but his side not..

above all these traditions, main thing is that u are finally going to be united as one, making ur vows in front of GOd, and you now have a task to be a good testimony to your new relatives..
 
Hi PM

really happy for you that all have worked out. PTL!

Keep your faith up because it is written that 'ALL things work out for the good of those who love Him'.
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Ribbons and Ivy, thanks so much for the encouragement. I really appreciate it, but being here and able to write out the problems made it soo much easier to see the solution.

Thanks once again.
 
Just to share, I had selected 4 songs to be sung during our worship, I had choosen 2 hymns and 2 modern songs.

Holy Holy Holy, Eagle's Wing, Lord of the Dance and Complete

Do we need to give our parents gift during the ceremony? And the unity candle? Any ideas?

Thanks!
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Hi PM

It is not compulsory to give your parents gifts during the ceremony. But most couples still do so in appreciation of everything that they have done. Hence, it's really up to you.

As for unity candle, this would depend on your church's practice. Do check out with your officiating pastor to see if your church emphasizes on it.
 
Hi everyone!

I found my flat! Hee.
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One large thing off my mind. God was indeed good. We nearly bought one, but waited another weekend and a better flat came on the market, and we managed to get that! Praise Him.

panicmode

I'm not having a unity candle, cos most ppl in my church don't get married having one. Also one less thing to buy.
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I'm thinking of giving my parents framed photos of us. hahaha, ego hor?
 
hi panicmode,

HB & I gave pressies to our parents during our Thank You speech.. We gave pix of us growing up, etcetc & inc 1 wedding pix

hi Twinkle

*congrats* Where's ur new place?

U giving a photo of u 2 to ur parents too? What type? No lah, not ego.. Coz u 2 moving out, so it's a gd pressie
 
panic mode: check with ur pastor... i'm having unity candle.. twinkle.. unity candle not ex lah... dont need to buy those tecman exclusively carved kind of candles.. (I cant bear burning it anyway.. too pretty). Get a simple candle and deco with flowers can liao lor.. =)

gift wise.. its really up to you.. we are giving our parents, but we wil give during tea ceremony.. cos i'm sure our parents want their hands to be free after service to shake hands with friends...


i just went to my BS on saturday to select photos.... rememberi used to say that the PS was hard.. i take that back.. the selection was harder!!

all the pics were so nice! and there were so many! my first change already got 100 over shots.. it took us 5 hours to choose photos for the 4 albums, table top, portrait, post cards... oh man... i brought my PG friend along, my AD PG also... made a whole world of difference, cos his experienced eey could tell us which pics to take, which not to take, what can be edited (eg: on of the shots we liked, had a proton saga in the background..), which shots off focus, which shots our eyes not focusing on same thing.. and from a 3rd person point of view, he could give us very valuable advice... so when u guys go sleect your PS photos... bring a trusted friend along!!!

oh.. and they edited some photos, to show us the diff... wow... the edited me looks good! hee...
 
Me got testimony to share... esp with those brides who run into some financial difficulty when planning wedding..

my pay is the lower pay, so hb pays for a lot of stuff... feel bad also, so i offered to pay for BS.. paid about half already... then after saturday, realise have to pay more cos we top up photos... then i just prayed a simple prayer and asked God to help... that simple a prayer...then after calculations and conversions.... the amount to be paid is the exact amount that i will be receiving for bonus!! EXACTLY leh.. wow... i got tingles down my back when i saw the amount man.. so i hope this encourages you all, dont think God cannot answer your prayers the way you want no matter how you pray or what you want.. he works in such great ways!!

i was thinking of asking God to maybe give me some help.. then my mum said, why u limit God in the way that He can intervene? Dont look down on what he can do.. so ok, i committed the whole thing to God and He answered it, just the way i asked for.. (of course He can answer it in other ways that He thinks is best too lah..)
 
hey wanna ask you all.. those who have new houses.. at your main gate, your ID/ contractor got drill hole in the floor for the bottom lock of the gate? or only top got hole for the locks? is it safe? Do you feel you would need to drill the hole on the floor just to make sure top and bottom of gate is locked? (and risk cracked tiles?)

appreciate all comments...
 
hi twinkle.

heheh, certainly 1 load off our minds.. and then gotta think of furnshings & renos!! Look fwd to hearing ur updates

hi ribbons,

so how many pix in total did u top-up? and the damage done? kekeke
Thank God for providing the ppl to help u in the selection and def the timely bonus which so perfectly matches the amt u need!! It's a miracle!
 
hi ribbons,
can see your photo? btw, where did you find those cheaper range of candles? I went to look for it but they are all very expensive. I intend to prepare gifts for parents too but have no idea of what to get for them. stress.
 
coco: in my opinion you dont really need to buy those candles with lots of carvings.. you can just get a simple fat candle to be ur centre candle (can buy at ikea).. and two smaller slimmer candles to be ur centre candle. and use flowers to deco lor.. i've attached a pic below, to illustrate the use of flowers and candles..

mehmeh: yes.... very cautious.. hee...

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i would try to post pics of an example i've done, but its too big and i dont wanna publish my link here cos i'll be seen as selling my prducts... but ask your florist to incoporate the candles as part of an floral arrangement..

note: dont buy the slimmer candles from ikea.. burn super fast..
 
twinkle: i am.. but flowers are my passion.. so i on and off do wedding floral decor for pple.. not business orientated..

wait wait.... b4 anyone else misunderstands or i get sued for copy right, that arranegment in the pic not done by me hor. pics of my arrangements that i have were too huge to be loaded in here, so i post this one.. smaller...

if you do need to see what i mean by incorporating candles into a arrangement, email me, i send you the pic by email.. so you can tell your florist what you want..
 
I love flowers too... wish i could get married in holland where tulips are Soooooo cheap.

Hey, came across a BEAUTIFUL wedding cake pix... upload here for you all to drool over. I'm not having a wedding cake, but guess a little daydreaming doesn't hurt. heehee.

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hi ribbons,
the pic is very nice. simple and nice. I don't have a florist as my HM will be in the hotel. It will be a simple one. Most likely I will have to diy myself. But I don't have that kind of creativity level. stress. can email me your big picture? thanks. [email protected]
 
twinkle... thats so pretty!!!

but i dont think i will want such a cake for my wedding.... cannot bear to cut it and i will be so protective of it... haha!!!

coco: DIY yourself lor... its easy. sent to you liao...
 
hi panicmode!
i tink it's a nice gesture to give your parents a gift just to honour them. i gave bouquets to my mum, mum in law, grandmas and a special aunt. on hindsight, shld hv bought a small gift for both dads as well so they dont feel left out.

as for unity candle, i tink it's great to show non-christians attending your wedding what it means for us christians when we become married, tt it's biblical for us to leave our families and become 1 united body. like the other brides said, unity candle v easy to DIY. i bought my fat candle and tray from ikea and got my florist to fill with flowers and it formed the centrepiece for the table on stage.
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the pix are on my website. u've the link?
 


ikea has nice candle stands for the big middle candle and two outer candles... but dont buy the slim ones from there.. burn super fast. my church hor, they will light b4 the service start.... usually other candles can last throu service, maybe half way down lah but still there... the ikea ones, by the time worship, more than half gone.. i feel so bad that the couple had to light their unity candles with stubby ugly candles.. burnt down to the stand by the time they use.. so dont buy the slim ones from ikea.. the fat ones are ok..
 
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