Catholic Advice Needed Please

antares

Member
hi gals,
like some of the gals here, my FH is a catholic but I am not. So I got some queries here... I had exchanged our rings in ROM, do we exchange again in the church? I will be having the church ceremony together with the customary wedding...
 


seraphim1970

New Member
Hi antares, I ROM in New York Feb 02 then we kept the rings and used our engagement rings till our church wedding in Singapore Sep 02.
 

seraphim1970

New Member
Hi sept03,

1) Did u have your wedding at the chapel or the main church?
<FONT COLOR="ff0000">Ans: We got married in the main church, that's where all the other couples gets married too.</FONT>
2) Did you engage their choir groups?
<FONT COLOR="ff0000">Ans: Yes we used the chuch choir.</FONT>
3) Did u take their florists?
<FONT COLOR="ff0000">Ans: Yes we used the church flower arrangement lady. Remember to check witht he parish secretary on who are the other couples getting married on the same day as you so you can all share the cost of the flowers.</FONT>
3) Do u have a photo of your wedding in the church?
<FONT COLOR="ff0000">Ans: I will send you a link to view my actual day wedding pictures.</FONT>
 

antares

Member
hi seraphim1970, thanks for sharing..
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Just wondering does anyone know what's the difference bet EE and MPC? Both my FH and I haven't decided which to attend. Any advices from you gals? Which one is better? Thks..
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lilac

New Member
Hi girls,

guess I need so advice here,just wondering if anyone is in the same situation as me. I am a Catholic while hubby is not but we have decided that we want a church wedding.

Since all his relatives are non-catholics and moreover the wedding is on a weekday (thurs), I am expecting the church wedding to be a quiet affair, probably even less then 20 people (including my bridesmaids &amp; his "brothers". Also, I am not sure if I can get the church choir on a weekday and my potential "page boy" &amp; "flower girl" will probably need to attend school as it is a Thursday.

I am now at a loss on what to do. I also have not attended a catholic church wedding before. But I am very sure that I want to go ahead with the church wedding
 

seraphim1970

New Member
Hi Lilac,

Here's my email [email protected], I am also Catholic, my hubby is not, we had our church wedding last year. Write to me if you need any help, I will try my best to advice you ok. Don't worry so much, continue praying.
 

rhs

New Member
Hi Lilac,
My situation is a bit similar to yours. I'm a catholic and FH is not. Moreover, we're both foreigner coming from non-english speaking country. So even our catholic relatives won't be able to sing the songs or follow the mass. Our hope is with the choir. Have u ask the choirs if they're available? Or maybe they can 'join force' between groups in your parish or even other parish. Just a question, why u choose weekday?
 

lilac

New Member
Hi rhs,

my dad is also a Catholic while my mum's not and she was the one who had picked the "auspicious" date for me. I din think that the date would be a problem until I started preparing for the church wedding recently.
 
Y

yet-to-be-catholic

Guest
hi all,

can i check something with you all? is it possible to have a church wedding if i m still having the RCIA course? my htb is not a catholic and i m going to be one soon but on my wedding day, i m still not baptised. any advice?

thanks!
 

seraphim1970

New Member
Yet-to-be Catholic

Yah, you should check with your priest or spiritual director from RCIA. Maybe your sponsors and facilitators can help you.
 

rhs

New Member
Hi Lilac,
I see. Well I can't be much of a help here, but my suggestion is to contact the choir leaders asap.
 
Y

yet-to-be catholic

Guest
hi cordelia &amp; seraphim

will check with him next week. thank u very muchie!
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fanny

New Member
Hi all

Quite new in this thread...
Anyone by chance are getting married (or had your church wedding) at the Holy Cross church - Clementi?

Any suggestion for the caterer and also the florist? I'm a bit 'lost' with these...
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Or maybe anyone heard about Holy Cross church own-florist?

Sorry for all the questions...
Thanks a lot
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happy.gif
 

dot

New Member
Hi hi, me new here too. Does any one know abt "gown restrictions" for catholics? Cos both mum &amp; MIL say no tube or bustier. &amp; am afraid to ask priests in case a straight no. thanks :)
 

alhana

New Member
Hi dot,

Not sure if it differs fr church to church but I think tube/bustier gowns are quite common now and shld not be a problem. If I recall correctly, Zoe Tay got married in a Catholic Church and she wore a similar type gown. Anyway only ure shoulders are exposed. As long as u dun look indecent it shld be alright!
 

paranoid

New Member
Hi all,
I am not a catholic but my FH is. Gonna attend EE and have a service in church for wedding. Meeting the priest soon. Apprehensive cos dun know what to expect. Will he try and convert me, ask me why I'm not catholic etc etc..? Then the EE is next weekend, quite moody, cos is stay in, and worried that it will really be a very religious kind of thing, and I can't even go home, have to tahan for 2 days...If you get married in church, will they somehow follow up on you and track you down few years later and see if you have converted?
 

crayonshinchan

New Member
hi paranoid,
same like u, i am not a catholic but my hubby is. So we have to attend either EE or MPC before the church wedding. we decided on MPC.

okie.. i was like u before attending the cse. I told my FH. if they are gonna preach or try to convert me, i'm not staying for the cse. well it proved to be wrong. nobody tried to convert me at all. Cos everyone believes tat u shd embrace the religion on our own. without anyone to force us.

i got to learn more abt the religion and wat it teachers. ya no doubt tat it will revolve around the religion but its not suffocating at all. very subtle kind of thing. tats what i like abt it. though there were times when i don totally agree with them, but i believe its bcos i am not ready to embrace the religion YET.

i believe u will enjoy EE. i actually regretted not signing up for EE cos i heard from a lot of pple who attended it tat its very good and we really learn a lot abt each other.. so i guess, u just dont think too much abt it, go there and have fun. dont be too moody. i am sure u will enjoy it.

and no la.. don worry. after ur marriage, they will not track u down. so relaz okie..
 

rhs

New Member
Hi Fanny,
I'm getting married in Holy Cross too! It's cheaper to use church florist, and if there are more than 1 wedding that day you can share the cost. E-mail me at [email protected] and I'll give you the florist number (it's HP so I don't think it's nice to post it here). As for caterer, most prob I'll use Angeli (http://www.angeli.com.sg) or Kriston. When's your wedding?

Paranoid,
Dun worry, they will NOT try to convert you
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. In fact during my EE, almost half were mixed religion couples. Even me, a catholic, was a bit reluctant to go, thinking of having to stay there for 2 days. But it went very fast, suddenly it's over. Most of the time you'll talk with your partner and not many group sharing. Just go with an open mind and you'll have fun!

Oh, and there's no such thing as tracking you down
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alhana

New Member
Hi paranoid,

Like u, I'm not a catholic..my hubby is. I think Catholics are not as 'aggressive' as some christian groups in trying to convert non-believers to their faith. I went for the MPC and did not experience any 'pressure' to convert etc. The whole session is aimed at marriage preparation, not religious conversion. You will mainly discuss life &amp; expectations as a married couple and get to know ure future spouse better. Don't worry too much abt it. Trust me, if it were anything of that nature (ie conversion), I wld've been so out of there
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I actually respected the fact that they didn't try to shove the religion down my throat. So go and have fun discovering more abt ure partner and ureself
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Its better to go with an open mind rather than apprehension. That way u'll find it a more enriching experience.
 

matka

Member
Hey Fanny &amp; rhs

Am getting married at Holy Cross too : )

Intending to use the church florist and will be sharing the flowers with the couple who'll be getting married on the same day.
 

rhs

New Member
Matka,
Yours is Oct 4th rite? Lucky you have another couple on that day. Once I saw a wedding there and the decorations were very nice. I was told that it was shared between 2 couples so they can have more flowers ($750 instead of $500). When do you plan to call the florist?
 

crayonshinchan

New Member
heee.. quite a number of pple getting married at holy cross leh... wanted to choose holy cross too but no slot to squeeze in on the day tat i wanted.. in the end we chose St Mary of the Angels.. anyone getting married there too???

btw, anyone having probs selecting the readings and the church march in?? i am getting a big headache...
 

binbin

New Member
hi hi, i am also getting married in a catholic church. my FH is a catholic but i am not. also having problems selecting readings and church march in.....
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how to go about doing that? think my FH knows more but he recently quite busy leh.....
 

binbin

New Member
eeeehhh....just realised i am the one who started this thread 8 mths ago asking for advice... Hehehhee... and got great advice from the girls in this thread. in the end we decided to hold our blessing ceremony on the actual day instead of ROM day......
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rhs

New Member
Actually Holy Cross is no longer my parish, I moved from Clementi 2 years ago. Therefore I had to ask permission from my own parish to get married there.

crayonshinchan,
Did you get booklet samples from your church? You should have few options from there. I make the booklet myself by 'mix-n-match' from all samples
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. I'm using Book of Genesis (2:18-24) for first reading and Corinthians (12:31 – 13:8) for the second reading.

oh wait, I found this list:
Old Testament (first reading)
Genesis 1:26-28, 31a
Genesis 2:18-24
Genesis 24:48-51, 58-67
Tobit 7:9c-10, 11c-14
Tobit 8:5-7
Song of Songs 2:8-10, 14, 16a, 8, 6-7a
Sirach 26:1-4, 13-16
Jeremiah 31:31-32a, 33-34a

Responsorial Psalm
All are found in Psalms
33:12, 18, 20-21, 22
34:1-9
103:1-2, 8, 13, 17-18
112:1-9
128:1-5
145:8-10, 15, 17-18
148:1-4, 9-14

New Testament (second reading)
Romans 8:31b-35, 37-39
Romans 12:1-2, 9-18
1 Corinthians 6:13c-15a, 17-20
1 Corinthians 12:31-13:8a
Ephesians 5:2a, 21-33
Colossians 3:12-17
1 Peter 3:1-9
1 John 3:18-14
1 John 4:7-12
Revelation 19:1, 5-9a

Gospel Acclamations
1 John 4:8, 11
1 John 4:12
1 John 4:16
1 John 4:7

Gospel Readings
Matthew 5:1-12
Matthew 5:13-16
Matthew 7:21, 24-29
Matthew 19:3-6
Matthew 22:35-40
Mark 10:6-9
John 2:1-11
John 15:9-12
John 15:12-16
John 17:20-26

HTH!
 

binbin

New Member
hi hi paranoid! wish to assure u something. i attended EE on valentines day this year, and it wasn't at all the religious thingie i expected and half-feared at all! i was quite open minded...and told myself even if it's religious i will be receptive coz i love my FH. it turns out to be the most enriching, interesting...and fun time!!! really! they teach you to open up, to communicate with your FH, to share your fears, your love, everything. they do not exactly preach the religious stuff, you will find that 95% of what they teach are so helpful and applicable to couples, and not exactly religion-referring. I believe that the catholic way of the family/love is very sound and insightful. it really helps us to learn and open up and forgive.

the best thing is, the couples and priest are so helpful, non-pushing and beri accomodating! you wun experience any of what you fear at all...
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believe me....you will enjoy it!
 

rhs

New Member
hi binbin,
hahahaha .... yep, you started this thread
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March in song doesn't have to be church song. It can be anything that is meaningful for you. I'll use Longer (Dan Fogelberg) for march in, and Prayer (Josh Groban) for march out.
 

binbin

New Member
hi hi rhs, u mean really dun need to be church song ah??? realli?? i was thinking of asking the choir to sing for the march in.....hhhhmmm.......

do u happen to have mp3 for Longer? wish to listen to it see what does it sound like? thanks so much!
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rhs

New Member
Check with your priest. Mine said it's ok but he want to see the lyrics to see if it's appropriate. What's your email? I'll send the song tonite.
 

paranoid

New Member
thks everyone for reassuring me.. Guess i am less apprehensive now. I stay near bukit batok and saw that st. mary of the angels is about ready, will it be ready for a short service early next year? anyone know?
 

jul

New Member
Hi paranoid,

Just came in to kpo a bit.

I went for EE in May this yr, &amp; I'm not Catholic either. Of course the basis surrounding the entire weekend is the Catholic religion, but the min focus on on your relationship as a couple.

The weekend stayover force you to concentrate on each other, w/o hps / TV / movies to distract you. But be prepared to be slightly 'bored' coz it's the same routine. Just gotta take it seriously &amp; try hard to communicate with each other.

oops! Hope I'm not sounding too preachy or something :p Just trying to help
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crayonshinchan

New Member
hi rhs,
i only have 2 samples leh.. then hor both like so different so i very blur.. then hubby lazy to help me and so its only like less than 4 months to my church wedding and i have not come up with the booklet!!!! die liao man!!!

thanks for ur list.. i will make full use of it!!!!
 

rhs

New Member
crayonshinchan,
maybe they're different because one is for full mass and the other is for service? I can send you mine if you want. Just pass me your e-mail. Dun forget to ask approval from your priest before start printing (usually when you sign the pre-nuptial docs)
 

jul

New Member
Hi rhs,

Are you having a mass / service? Can you let me know what is the process of getting the church wedding? That is, apply for ROM e-filing, interview with priest, when to pay deposit etc. Thanks
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rhs

New Member
Hi jul,
Mine is a full mass. Here's what I did (may not in the same order for your church)
1. Contact parish priest to ask approval
2. Contact celebrant &amp; church secretary to see if the date is available
3. Submit registration form to church secretary, book &amp; pay for reception hall (if needed), collect booklet samples
4. Contact choir leader
5. Meet celebrant to sign pre-nuptial docs, pay church usage (it's a donation, can be any amount), discuss abt mass booklet
6. If you haven't ROM, then register to ROM
 

rhs

New Member
crayonshinchan &amp; lilac,
pls check your email

binbin,
I'll send the song tonite, okie? I have it at home

Just FYI, most old booklets still have lighting of the matrimonial candle inside the mass. But the new rule is to do it after final blessing.
 

jul

New Member
Rhs,

Thks! What's the diff between full mass &amp; service? It's just the omission of communion right? Everything else is the same?
 

binbin

New Member
hi hi rhs, sure, thanks! can u send the booklet as well to my email? thanks so much u are a dear...
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rhs

New Member
Hi jul,
Got other things removed from the service, but the main one is communion.

binbin &amp; ilyena,
pls check your emails for the booklet
 

matka

Member
rhs
yup, you got the date right : ) Oct thread, right?

I haven't called the florist yet *blush*. Will be calling her as soon as i can get around to fixing an appropriate time to meet her. Right now the cost that i have from the other bride whom i'll be sharing the flowers with on the same day is $500. I don't suppose we will increase the no of flowers because we'll have to save the $$$ for the reception too. The expenses is scary ya?

Oh yes, choosing which readings to use is really tough! Are you girls doing 1 Reading or 2 Readings?
 

binbin

New Member
hey rhs, wish to tell u thanks for sending the stuff to me...hehhehee....will refer to it when we start planning our church wedding...going to do so SOON! hehehee...THanks!
 

binbin

New Member
hi dear all, need advice on whether there are any catholic churches in the north west area i.e. bukit panjang, CCK, bukit batok etc...... thanks so much...
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