memorable chocolate, here r my replies:
1. If u afraid is awkward n both side not happy about the ping jing if never verbally relay msg, better to ask ur FH's father to ask ur mum whether 3888 is ok anot during their meetup dinner. Be open abt it if both sides r not really tat traditional.
2. Returning how much is up to ur, any amount will do de, $888 is a humble amount ah..no worries..anyway is a yi si yi si nia...
3. if ur mum request for no. of tables, usually the angbaos for all the tables r given to her but u have to be clear with her, if the angbao is 'underpaid' for the number of tables - for example, she receive only 5k for 6 tables but ur 1 table cost is $1k, is she gonna 'absorb' the cost or u all have to top up for her? Same goes to 'overpaid' as in receive more than the value of tables, does she still take or will return bal to u...this is very very sensitive $$ issue..have to talk it out calmly n asap.
4. 4 dian jing is actually not a must nowadays.. now pure gold is damn ex, ur 1 phoenix bracelet can be cheaper than those 1 set of 4 dian jing..I dun think is cheapo..for me, I only get white gold ala carte 4 dian jing coz I wan to wear it on normal days as well..
5. GDL: discuss with ur parents how much they want..usually give 1 box per relative family, roasted pig can be cans of pig trotters, then hard liquor, oranges, ur ping jing, the phoenix dragon candles, then u have to plan wat dowry u all wan to give groom side too.
6. yup, shld ask whatever both parents want n agree to avoid conflicts etc..