Sleep incompatibility

[angelknight]

Hi all I'm troubled and need some advice. HTB and I have very different sleeping habits and I'm at a loss as to what to do. We are getting married this year and so far on all of our trips I haven't been sleeping well. He snores and prefers a night light on at night while I prefer total darkness and a quiet room. He also tends to move around a lot on the bed and I get very affected. Also, I've grown up sleeping in aircon room while he prefer using the fan. Sometimes I feel like giving up due to the many issues we face. Esp issues with MIL now that we are getting married. Also, I have to stay with my PIL as my house won't be ready by my wedding. Both of us feel upset as we feel that we are already compromising for the other. As such, we have had countless quarrels etc. Should I give up??

 

[sylim.bride]

Hi all I'm troubled and need some advice. HTB and I have very different sleeping habits and I'm at a loss as to what to do. We are getting married this year and so far on all of our trips I haven't been sleeping well. He snores and prefers a night light on at night while I prefer total darkness and a quiet room. He also tends to move around a lot on the bed and I get very affected. Also, I've grown up sleeping in aircon room while he prefer using the fan. Sometimes I feel like giving up due to the many issues we face. Esp issues with MIL now that we are getting married. Also, I have to stay with my PIL as my house won't be ready by my wedding. Both of us feel upset as we feel that we are already compromising for the other. As such, we have had countless quarrels etc. Should I give up??

Give up? It depends on how strong your relationship is...

I feel that a strong marriage takes two to build and maintain... Both parties most likely come from different living habits, cultures and preferences hence friction is unavoidable. There isn't a certain limit to the amount you should compromise, as long as you love each other, you will work things out as a couple.

Frequent snoring is caused when air can't move freely through your nose and throat so maybe consulting a doctor may help. As for sleeping with the lights on, he could compromise by dimming the lights or you could wear a sleeping mask to sleep.

Compromising one person's living habits is already difficult, what more about under one roof with your in laws. They are your in-laws, respect is the only advice. Any unhappiness or disputes with your in laws, let your HTB handle and not you. Get him to be the spokesperson when speaking to his parents if any disagreement arises.

Hope it helps. Easy said than done. I'm also working towards abovementioned... Ultimately, respect, accommodate and compromise are crucial in all relationships.

 

[angelknight]

Give up? It depends on how strong your relationship is...

I feel that a strong marriage takes two to build and maintain... Both parties most likely come from different living habits, cultures and preferences hence friction is unavoidable. There isn't a certain limit to the amount you should compromise, as long as you love each other, you will work things out as a couple.

Frequent snoring is caused when air can't move freely through your nose and throat so maybe consulting a doctor may help. As for sleeping with the lights on, he could compromise by dimming the lights or you could wear a sleeping mask to sleep.

Compromising one person's living habits is already difficult, what more about under one roof with your in laws. They are your in-laws, respect is the only advice. Any unhappiness or disputes with your in laws, let your HTB handle and not you. Get him to be the spokesperson when speaking to his parents if any disagreement arises.

Hope it helps. Easy said than done. I'm also working towards abovementioned... Ultimately, respect, accommodate and compromise are crucial in all relationships.

Thanks sylim.bride! Hope things work out well for u too..