May I know how do distribute household expense in your family? Did husband pay all? Did wife pay all? Or equally share between husband and wife? In my situation I paid all my household expense except for my maid salary, my husband paid it. I tried to discuss with him previously what I get only my husband paid my maid salary because my salary is not enough to cover
Household expense distribution in your family
- Thread starter riceincup
- Start date
My maid salary sometime I feel tired with this marriage it seem money is not enough. I always has short of money, no saving. My monthly salary just come in and out every month. Meanwhile my husband saving is getting more and more whenever he is angry with me he would say his saving is his money but did he ever realize that if it is not me who cover everything he would not have that much money. At times I would need to take some balance transfer from some bank. even I manage to pay from my bonus but until when should I stay like this? Sometime I m thinking to end this marriage because I m too tired already. It is not just money problem, he has meant behavior and childish in example when he senp
sweet_avender
New Member
A man must be able to handle all family expenses. And whether if the wife wanna chip in is another issue. This is a man responsibility.
I believe u should be firm if u wanna get him to pay. Like decide on a sum of money and said u will only pay that amt and ignore anything else if not u will end up paying everything. If he refuse to pay the rest mean he don think is impt, so y must u b responsible for that. Or take up a saving plan. They will make sure u put in a sum of money every mth. There is nth he can do if u are firm.
This is just my own opinion.
I believe u should be firm if u wanna get him to pay. Like decide on a sum of money and said u will only pay that amt and ignore anything else if not u will end up paying everything. If he refuse to pay the rest mean he don think is impt, so y must u b responsible for that. Or take up a saving plan. They will make sure u put in a sum of money every mth. There is nth he can do if u are firm.
This is just my own opinion.
rabber
Member
Oh gosh, I think whatever works for each family. But I do believe in both contributing an being able to enjoy the same way. i.e, if hubby earns more, hubby pays more. If wife earns more, wife pays more. It cannot be one party pay most of it and the other one has so much more money to enjoy etc.
If you're already struggling, sit down and list out exactly how much each of you are contributing and earning and also what values and expectations you have for this household.
Money is a big topic though it's often a hush hush topic.
If you're already struggling, sit down and list out exactly how much each of you are contributing and earning and also what values and expectations you have for this household.
Money is a big topic though it's often a hush hush topic.
It is not quite right for a couple to split cost right down to the last cent in a marriage. Do talk to your spouse and find out where the issue lies. You have to be very honest and tell your spouse how you feel; keep the communication channel open without accusing each other. If all else fails, it may be good to see a counsellor.
miloice
Well-Known Member
why do you even want to marry a guy like this? On one hand, the view that man is responsible for all financials is kind of away from today's context. unless they are willing to live like the wives of yesterday.
Basically, our spouse is our other half, why would we exploit them ? Placing our expectations on them and relax & enjoy from it, not laying a finger to help the burden? Is that even a marriage?
Basically, our spouse is our other half, why would we exploit them ? Placing our expectations on them and relax & enjoy from it, not laying a finger to help the burden? Is that even a marriage?
ooosh
New Member
sweet_avender, is there any reason why MEN should pay all of the household expenses?
You have to remember it is 2013 now, not 1913. Both wife and husband are working why can't they pay household bills equally?
If going out on nice dinners, the guy pay its alright. But for the guy to pay everything including Cars, house, bills, food? Get a life man....
It is people like you with these kind of mindset that the other half is suffering...
You have to remember it is 2013 now, not 1913. Both wife and husband are working why can't they pay household bills equally?
If going out on nice dinners, the guy pay its alright. But for the guy to pay everything including Cars, house, bills, food? Get a life man....
It is people like you with these kind of mindset that the other half is suffering...
yesno333
Member
Personally i don't see anything wrong with expecting the guy to pay for everything...that is on the basis that you are able to find a guy that is dumb enough to do that.
But if you cannot find a guy that is willing to do that....you should start to look at the mirror and ask yourself why no one is willing to do that for you...probably it is because ur mindset is still stuck in never never land...
Realistically speaking, it would be best if both parties contribute more or less equally in the relationship.
But if you cannot find a guy that is willing to do that....you should start to look at the mirror and ask yourself why no one is willing to do that for you...probably it is because ur mindset is still stuck in never never land...
Realistically speaking, it would be best if both parties contribute more or less equally in the relationship.
This year will be our 21st wedding anniversary. This is how we take care of the finances in our marriage. As my spouse earns more, he pays a higher portion of all our major expenses e.g. mortgage loans and holidays. I pay for most of the marketing & groceries as I am the one doing it. Expenses such as taxi rides, movies, adhoc part-time cleaning services and eating out at restaurants, we take turns to pay, there is no hard and fast rules. If it happens to be my pay day and I am feeling generous, I'll offer to pay, likewise for him. And if the cleaner comes and I happen to run out of money, I'll take some from his wallet.
We don't have a joint account but we have each other's ATM PIN (I remember his PIN but he doesn't bother to remember mine!). We know each other's net worth, nothing is hidden. He pays for his own indulgences (sports equipment) and I pay for mine. He does appreciate my non-monetary contribution, especially all the housework and cooking, because he knows that he has to pay for these services if he is living on his own! So once in a while, he will give me some 'bonuses' (I work free-lance so that I can take care of the housekeeping but the trade-off is no bonuses) to acknowledge my contributions.
In a marriage, it is very important to have trust and open communication. A marriage is a relationship, not a business transaction. Hence, both sides should not be so calculative.
We don't have a joint account but we have each other's ATM PIN (I remember his PIN but he doesn't bother to remember mine!). We know each other's net worth, nothing is hidden. He pays for his own indulgences (sports equipment) and I pay for mine. He does appreciate my non-monetary contribution, especially all the housework and cooking, because he knows that he has to pay for these services if he is living on his own! So once in a while, he will give me some 'bonuses' (I work free-lance so that I can take care of the housekeeping but the trade-off is no bonuses) to acknowledge my contributions.
In a marriage, it is very important to have trust and open communication. A marriage is a relationship, not a business transaction. Hence, both sides should not be so calculative.