Catholic Brides

roidana

New Member
Minssy, thanks for the file.. got it... just praying and praying that i havent forgotten things, and that everyting will turn out fine. 3 weeks away....
 


jklim4642

New Member
CG... thanks so much for the help. i thought on AD, bride can need not bring anything.. it seems that i still need to pass my ic to my FH.... thanks again....

i just met the priest just now
& he already given the green light to our booklet. no need any amendments.. i will go ahead to print & do the booklet myself next mth.. another 180-200 booklets to do... tiring!
 

minssy

New Member
hi roidana,

welcome
happy.gif
yah the deal is that u just plan & plan.. then communicate to your helpers... then on the AD, let them execute all the stuff.. u, as a bride, shd not worry a single thing! :D
 

kitty_li

Active Member
Hi bride,
I attended both EE and MPC. EE - before we decided to get married. For some couples, the topics or "activities" at EE is nothing new, coz they have already been doing it (talking things through and communicating with each other). My experience with EE is that, EE is more couple focused. Yes, you can chat with other couples, but most of the time, it's to communicate with your partner and share your inner most thoughts with your partner. The time spent is really about opening up yourselves to each other.

MPC - we enjoyed our MPC sessions too. While it's a little bit tough having to commit 6 Sundays (and each session @ SJI starts at 830am), going through that "tough" bit on Sunday mornings also brought us closer. It felt good overcoming that "obstacle" - like, yeah we did it together kinda thing. The sessions at MPC were also quite informative. And at each home session, there's group sharing, and there may be non-catholics in the group (so it may feel like it's cathecism class). It can be quite inspiring, listening to other couples share their experiences. And when you share your own experiences to the rest, it's like, accepting yourself, kinda thing.

Overall, we enjoyed both EE and MPC, but we like EE more.
happy.gif


The essential thing is to be open and communicate with your partner.
 

jklim4642

New Member
CSI, we have settled our worries on the witness part yesterday when we met Father for the pre-nuptial discussion. he will accomodate my FMIL & have the signing of the register at the floor level. he is so understanding & easy going. the wedding service booklet that i have prepared, he combed through it quickly & said well done! no need any changes! and, we are going to have lighting of the candles & a communion.

i have discussed with my FH, we will get his BIL to do all the coordination for us on AD.... remind Father on where to place the signing table 1/2 hr before the ceremony, ensure buffet is ready, pass him the candles to have them set up, pass him the ring pillow, etc. he is very good at planning & coordination work... & he is very cool & calm... training from his profession.... he comands & heads the whole army camp!

floral arrangement, dun hv to worry. b'coz the couple b4 us for 9am ceremony is very easy going also & wans to share. she told me i can choose the colour theme & flowers & set up that i like as long as is within the budget she told me... she will leave the decision to me! so, i just have to talk to the florist to set up the church hall the night before... no need to rush on AD
happy.gif
 

kitty_li

Active Member
hi diamond,
That's good news.

see? Things will unfold nicely. All that complaining, worrying etc...was totally not necessary, right? So next time, just check and clarify with the relevant pple involved first before you start to worry.
 

jklim4642

New Member
CSI/CG, which side shld my daddy be at when he walks in the church with me? my right hand side or left hand side?

also, my bridal bouquet, will it be carried by my bridemaid instead of me when i walk in with my daddy?

thanks!
 

adel23

New Member
hi gals
been busy with preps and work, got some catching up to do in this forum.
happy.gif


minssy, thanks for the program once again,it was very very informative, you are very detailed! which is good as i didnt even take note of those issues! anyway you are a great help here ! thanks again..

Bride, i assume EE is more popular than MPC just based on the fact that its shorter (over 3 days) instead of over a period of time. We attended EE and though it was 3 days, we found it very intensive , like after a whilem our brain quite dead loh... haha... if we had the time, we might have gone for MPC.. however, attending either one is just as fulfilling anyhow
happy.gif


roidana, my AD in 4 weeks time ... me also feeling stressed... but trying to calm myself down and do things one at a time... before you know it, the day will come and go in no time! so im trying to enjoy the journey as i go along (with the stress!) haha...
 

cornwall

New Member
Hi Diamond

Wow I was so surprised to see so much activity in this thread in the short span of a few hours !

I am really glad that things are working out for you . and the bride before you has agreed to share the flowers. I guess everyone is also v busy and tensed up. For me the big day is just 3 wks more to the big day . haha

I am not sure which side my dad will stand as he sends me in. from past weddings I attended, its normally the right side? Not sure myself too.I think you wil have to firm that up again with your priest on the day of the wedding rehersal.
THe bridal bouquet should be carried by you .. else what is the point of the bridal bouquet.. haha
My sis , my bridesmaid will have her own bouquet.
 

jklim4642

New Member
CG.. oh u mean, my sister will hv her own bouquet also? i did not know that.... hehehe...

i just applied 3 days leave before my AD on 9 Dec. my boss actually said i applied too far in advance!! my goodness...
 

kitty_li

Active Member
it is not necessary for bridesmaids to have bouquets. Really up to individual. I have frens whose bridesmaids didn't carry any bouquets. They just walked in (2 hands clasped together). Probably the bridesmaids didn't want bouquets...
 

cornwall

New Member
Diamond

CSI is right. Not compulsory for bridesmaids to have bouquets so dont worry ok? Its up to individual.

Even if u want, you can do a very simple one. Buy a couple stalks of roses and tie into a bunch like what i am gg to do for my sis and flwoer kids..

Cheers, C
 

adel23

New Member
CG, yeah ! i have that idea too,was thinking of just a few stalks of flowers (havent decided on my choice of flowers yet) and then tie up with nice ribbons! Should be nice! I have 3 bridesmaids who will walk in before me. I dont have flowers gals/boys as i feel they are quite unpredictable but i do admit they will make the entrance nicer..
happy.gif
 

cornwall

New Member
Yea.. its actually quite easy and cost effective as well. It can cost up to 50 $ or more to have a professional florist do a bridesmaid bouquet. hahah....Guess I must be the most cheapo bride on this forum. I am going to do little possies for my flower girls and a bouquet for Mother Mary. ;)
 

jklim4642

New Member
adel & CG, when will u get these stalks of flowers? the day before? if so, how to keep them fresh & ensure that they do not wither the next day?

wat wld be a good number of stalks for each BM to carry?
 

adel23

New Member
CG, not cheapo lah, you are just being economical loh... hehe... me also mah...

diamond, i will get it the day before, get hardier ones so they dont wither and anyway its just for the entrance into the church in the morning so should be fine... errr.... as for what to do with flowers after that, errr... put on my lap? haha...i havent thought about it... good thoughts anyhow... i guess i will pass it to someone sitting in the first bench...
 

cornwall

New Member
Hi Diamond,,,

if you get the flowers the day before the wedding, it should still keep fresh for the next day , esp if you getting fresh roses.

As to the number of flowers for the bridesmaid, it really depends on how big u want the bouquet to be? ie.. 5-10 stalks tied with a simple ribbon? Its up to you...
 

roidana

New Member
Hi Adel, 3 weeks away.. exactly.. a little worried here... ok.. shall learn to relax a little.

Yup, i will be doing the economical method for my maid of honour and the little flower girl... give them a bunch of roses tied up with ribbons.... samller bouquet for the flower girl.. and yes, i will be passing my bouquet to my maid of honour when i reach the alter..
happy.gif
 

kitty_li

Active Member
Hey adel, roidana,
If your bouquet is not too huge, I think u can put the bouquet on the pew in front you (there's that pew thingy in front of the couple chairs, so the couple can kneel also...I dunno what they are called, but u know what I'm talking abt?) It would be nicer for photos too...
happy.gif
 

kitty_li

Active Member
I dunno...are the doors supposed to be closed in the first place? If you want them closed, you can arrange for someone u're comfy with to open.
 

kitty_li

Active Member
Better to ask the SFX BTBs then. Coz I know mine won't be closed. The other side of the doors of St Teresa is the outside of the church. Think too hot for me, esp if the haze does't let up. Think those at IHM, Holy Fam, Holy Trin(?) close their doors too. Holy Cross, Sacred Heart - those that I've attended didn't close the doors.

Probably also a personal preference lah. No should or shouldn't. Sorry, can't help you here.
 

jklim4642

New Member
CSI, why shld it be too hot for u? just curious. u wld be waiting in the aircon car/room until it is ready for the wedding to start. ie, someone signals the doors to close, then u came out to stand outside the doors. then someone signals to ring the bell.. the doors open & u walk in! (SFX organist told me one)
happy.gif


my friend just attended a church wedding
not sure which church. the doors were also closed prior to the bride walking in.
 

kitty_li

Active Member
seriously, it's up to you. I cannot tahan without aircon. It's just ME. So by the time I get out of car, stand outside the doors etc, arrange my skirt etc...I'd have half melted. Since SFX suits you to a T, and it's so simple for you, good for you. Why dun u ask the SFX organist who shd open the door for you?
 

adel23

New Member
diamond, i think i will close the doors... so can give grand entrance haha.... but you know SFX's doors are glass hor??? so not really a diff cos people can still somewhat see... but like CSI said, to each its own..
happy.gif
 

este

New Member
Hi all!
I'm quite new to this thread...just to intro, I'm a BTB, AD on the 28th of Jul '07.I'm a convert to Catholicism, the only one in my family.
Fiance is a buddhist, but we're having wedding mass in Holy Trin.
Need some advice regarding the following:-
My parents-in-law are very traditional chinese and so i must have the tea ceremony before I go to church for mass...As we've tentatively decided to have the mass at 11am, there seems to be enough time for tea ceremony for my family as well.
The question is, after mass, should I have the lunch at the church or would it seem better to have it at home (it's quite nearby)? I have some church friends attending the mass but the majority will be both sides' relatives of which none are catholic.
Sorry if this seems trivial but I've been thinking about it for a long time & would like to hear from any of you.
thanks!
 

minssy

New Member
hi este,

yes u need to have a simple lunch recep in church for your guests attending the church wedding.. as for the tea ceremonies, preparing simple food in the 2 houses is sufficient... reason being its still before 11am and light food can be served...
 

adel23

New Member
Hello este
Im having a mass at 11 as well and my home is 3 min walk from church, however i will be having the lunch reception in the church canteen even though my husband's side are all non catholics. We feel that 1) it will be convenenient for all the guests to move on to the canteen and 2) the house will be quite messy after all the guests have left, dont think we want to stress ourselves cleaning up cos we have a dinner on the same night... have you discussed with your parents?
 

jklim4642

New Member
girls, anyone can advise me on the amt of angbow money to give the following:

- Priest
- Organist
- Soloist
- Alter boy
- Canteen guy
 

jklim4642

New Member
CG, yes, that was what i said earlier. but, yesterday, when i told my FH, priest gives $80. he said dunno if too little. am not a catholic leh..when i asked him then how much, he said dunno. wat lao...
 

cornwall

New Member
Hi Diamond, its ok. yr husband is being prudent and besides , 2K abit too much for angpows unless you are having a huge entourage of helpers .. My friend who is a professional wedding planner advised as follows:

-Priest- if you are close to him, give 100$ onwards, if you are not too close, give 50-80$
- Organist -> since the organist and soloist is going to play for your entire wedding mass, 100-200 $
- Soloist
- Alter boy -> anything from 8 dollars onwards
- Canteen guy--> anything from 8 dollars onwards

Do remember , the angpow is an yi shi to present a token of your appreciation. Its not a professional fee and at the end of the day the amount to give is subjective, no hard and fast rule and all up to the couple. Hence dont fret so much over this .
happy.gif


Hope this helps.

Cheers, CG
 

jklim4642

New Member
CG.... oic. thanks for the information. even though my organist said her service is by way of an angbow, she did hint many many times that the market rate for a wedding service is $150 while that of a mass is $200!! she said her soloist's angbow is small. but when i asked her how small, she did not want to tell me.

the organist also said alter boy's angbows are small.. similarly she did not wan to tell me so. i did not know is as small as $8 till u told me.

check with u, if we are borrowing the bridal car from my FH's cousin & we are getting another cousin to drive that car. how much shld we give the owner of the car & the driver? i suggested $80 for the former & my FH actually asked me if it is too little since the organist is already $150.... (he also asked me why priest's angbow is smaller than the organist - we are not close to the priest)

i know angbow is yi shi... but i am just scared there is a market rate... people dont complain if they get angbow above market rate.. BUT if is the other way round, they may complain.

i did a preliminary assessment on the people to give angbows:
- Priest
- Alter boys (how many will there be? 2?, i am asked to prepare extra)
- organist (she hinted is $150 for service)
- soloist
- Canteen guy who will work with the caterer on the buffet set up
- BIL who will be the co-ordinator, eg, ensure the ring pillow is at the alter, the candles are set up, buffet is up on time, etc
- 2 helpers at the reception table
- 2 helpers to open the doors when i walk in & to usher the guests
- Owner of the bridal car
- Driver of the bridal car
- how abt all the young children?? my mum said shld give them all angbows BUT my FH said what for?
- professional photographer need angbow?
 

cornwall

New Member
Hi Diamond

its really quite tough to advise you beyond what i have said as like I said, its really very subjective.

Why dont your FH and you just set a side a budget, say a few hundred or 1K sgd or 2K sdg or more, and start working from there ?. Since you have mentioned a 2k sgd budget already for angpows, I think it should be more than enough to dispense pretty generous Angpows to all your helpers, organists, priests , etc and whom ever u deem necessary to pay for helping at yr wedding.
 

notredame

New Member
Hello everyone,

Just wanted to find out what's the general rental rate or "donation" for using a church now? I looked at St Mary's of the Angels, it charges $1000! wowweee..
I think i'll go with one either St Peter & Paul or Cathedral of the Good Shephard. Anyone having their ceremony at these churches?
 

lyons

New Member
hey notredame, as far as i know, cathedral of the good shephard does not do weddings for locals unless you can prove you're a foreigner getting married here. It's not a parish church, that's why. St Peter & Paul is possible but I heard they're pretty strict on only allowing their parishioners to hold their weddings there.
 

notredame

New Member
thanks gals.

Well my fiance is a foreigner and the reason why I can't use my own parish church, St Bernadette's, is because it's gonna be under renovation next year, so I think i have 2 pretty valid excuses!

I guess i'll have to go down personally. I didnt know Cathedral is not a parish church...interesting..
 

kitty_li

Active Member
Yap, the Cathedral is not a parish, just like Novena...
If I'm not wrong, the $1k charge by SMOTA includes the floral deco for the wedding...Some parishes charge $100, $200...for church and a separate amt for canteen/reception area. Since yours is next year, you still have some time to call up and ask around. heehee...
happy.gif
 

jklim4642

New Member
CSI, my FMIL is not in a very good shape again.... she is in pain.. her bones... just went for a scan today.... results will only be out on fri... very stressed... this mth, all the treatments already cost 7k leow.... must pray that nothing wrong with her bones...
 


kitty_li

Active Member
yes Diamond, even though you are not a Catholic, you shd join your FH in prayer...Maybe both of you can try the Saturday Novena sessions at Novena Church...

In the meanwhile, we'll keep her in our prayers.
 

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