(2008) Brides of year 2008

jolene, u are right that we cannot take the angbao for the dinner and expect in-laws to pay the ang pows for future's relatives wedding..

but in the 1st place, the wedding dinner is supposed to be paid by groom's parents, then they will give a no of tables to the gal's parents and then keep the relatives ang pows so that if future.. if they are invited to the relative's wedding.. they will use the $$ to give back the relative..
 


lolz.. the open door one really hopeless leh...

jane, maybe u can ermmm... rent a hse and move out ba... crazy leh.. off aircon.. buay tahan...

hmmm but hor sometimes maybe coz ur HBs too qing cai ba... in my HB hse, no one dares to complain or interfere with anythg my HB does. Not even my PIL and Grandmother inlaw...because my HB fed himself and bring money home since a very young age...even when he still in JC. And able to make more sensible decisions than his siblings and even his parents sometimes... As such, i thk he has a lot of say and the parents respect him alot...

good for me coz that means i can live in peace liao...

on the other hand, I have a monster mother myself.. and i cant wait to leave the hse for good...I guess its partly coz i have a unreasonable mother who never love us enough, hence any mother more caring and nicer than my mother, i salute haha...

i guess, every family has their own problems lah.. as long as ur HBs love u.. everythg else can pretend dun exist...
 
lost.. ya lor.. i will tell her off next time if she does it again...

jolene.. dats y i nv make tins ugly by pretending to be nice to them.. but it makes me ugly.. i've become 2 persons.. haiz...

i rather take the ang bao now den next time gt realtives wedding den pay the ang bao ourselves.. my PIL so money minded.. scarly they take ang bao and next time relatives wedding still ask us to pay ourselves..

dat time got once my MIL say ask us give her $50 each every mth for the grandpa's birthday and guess wat.. the birthday is next yr one.. and his family quite big.. $50 each is alot for more than 1 yr... den i ask my hubby questioned her.. den she say "if got extra den i can use the money go for holiday".. wah lau.. if she really wan go holiday we will sponsor her go one lor.. but i dun like she use excuses to get money for her own purposes...
 
jolene.. now u understand my MIL is MONSTER!!

haiz maybe becoz my MIL got 3 daughters so not in need of DIL.. my hubby also since young support himself.. but his parents also like dat. they just CMI LA!!! see his sisters can tell wat kind of parents they r le.. lucky my hubby nt like them..

the more i tin the angrier i am le.. buay dahan...
 
lost = i thk nwadays hor, that practice no longer exist liao le... how many parents in the world can afford their kids' wedding...? My dad doesnt pay for my brother's wedding.. we shld be proud tt we are able to pay for our own wedding and pay for the parents' tables too..

if everyone think that bringing a child up include paying for their wedding.. i guess i know why the birth rate is so low liao... so demoralising for parents lehh...

i think parents brought us up so its okay to give them wat they want lor... i dont thk they expect alot from ur HB all their lives ba... but if they do, then they dont deserve the angbaos too...this one i wont know.. only u and ur HB knw...

anyway, wat abt the brides' mothers then? I have a mother who likes to decide the floral arrangement of my ballroom, to the menu.. to my bedsheets, to my WG design, to my EG colour...

My mother even complained like crazi at the food tasting lor.. and my MIL just says its okay la.. its okay.. and my mother demands so many thgs for GDL lor.. my mother was the one who CHOSE MY 4GOLD... can u believe it?

heehee.. maybe thats why i feel that my inlaws are far too nice to be pushover by my mother liao...
 
jolene.. maybe for ur case ur MIL nicer than ur mother le..

we r nt saying dat parents shud pay for the child's wedding... but at least contribute abit or even if nv contribute also dun be so hypocrite.. like i said my MIL say she no money den gt money shopping..

please lor like wat lost say now it's they qu xi fu.. we r the one whom give birth to their grandchildren.. they shud be treating us better lor...

anyway im nt saying all MILs are bad.. just dat mine is CMI..
 
jolene, maybe ur mother too demanding so.. ur MIL will seem to be much better... haha.. as for the ang pows (by the way, his mum keep thinking tat the dinner can be covered by the ang pows, faint*, now i already set aside 10k for losses lor..) and expectations from my hb.. i think he will know.. cos they dun respect him.. even his younger sister can scream at him in front of parents and me.. totally no respect.. he also know.. tat's why he chose to live with me next time alone.. his mum also know abt it.. next time no chance to stay with us liao :D but also dun mean tat will not take care of them lah..

jane.. this is very gd example when things turn ugly.. but I tolerated them abt 2 year..then i burst one.. within 2 years.. me and hb had a lot of arguments and actually want to separate liao.. but think think.. no point separate with him because of his mum and family.. just move out can liao mah.. :D haha..
 
maybe ur MIL is insecure?

does she tok alot to ur HB? Does he knw whether she is insecure now that her only son is going to be 'snatched' away by another woman.. its common to be rivalry for MIL and DIL.. coz there are alot of misunderstanding...

maybe its good to sit down and sort out the misunderstanding and miscommunication. One thing is, must tell the HBs never to tell the MIL wat u say abt her and vice versa..coz in between bound to hv some decrepancy in the message passed...best is to calm down and discuss the different in expectations for after marriage life
 
lost = phew.. lucky nv separate wor.. i thk hor really not worth it to break with a man u love just coz of his family.. if he stand by you then good mah
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But hor, i still thk maybe shld sit down and tok abt it... thrashed it out..its better than next time got resentment wor... by tt time outburst is tian1 xia4 da4 luan4 already...

maybe shld catch the sister and wack her! hahaha...teach her some manners! frankly i cannot stand kids with no manners... will snap and scold them straight...worse if the younger siblings or cousins show no manners..

in a way, true la.. coz my mother like monster so anyone else less extreme and less aggressive than her i thk is saint already.. i moved out of my hse and hiding in my HB hse for mths liao..

at first my HB family duno wats the big issue tt i wana move out of my hse.. after all, i tolerated for 29yrs ^^ until the food tasting, they jian4 shi4 my mother's pattern.. even my Grandma Inlaw looks unhappy coz my mother can overturn her decision about the dishes.. Kao~!!! I buay song lor...tot the inlaws side should have more say?

I told my HB i dont want tok to my mother and leave it to her.. and she knows i mean wat i say if she tries to be funni again.. (coz i had never openingly opposed my mother all my life.. everytime argued with her will kena hit until can die lor.. so now she knws i m serious liao...)


So now everythg leave it to my HB to settle with my mother..
 
gals. i need help..i;m looking for a particular brand of wu hua guo (preserved stuff)
if u happen to see it.. pls tell me where.. other brands jus dun taste the same~
 
lost.. i just dunno how long more i can tolerate it.. haiz..

imagine my PIL's hse now stays FIL and MIL, 2 sisters and 1 nephew.. den + my and my hubby.. dunno how to live my life lor...

and his nephew is exactly like his sister.. no manners at all.. everytime talk to him feel like giving him a slap one..
 
jane.. jolene is right too.. cos i think my MIL scares she loses her son.. haha.. but ended up i told my hubby.. go tell her.. u never lose a son.. in fact u gain a daugther.. treat u so much better than ur 2 own daugthers.. :D oh.. by the way, i treat her very nice one hor.. even though i can be very bad at times lah..

just that she dun know how to appreciate me lah.. during mother's day i bought her brooch even though i very angry with her wor.. cos that time a lot of issues.. then gave her.. next day she called me.. ask whether can change something else anot.. wanted to change for her one.. but it's because she said very mean thing.. she said.. can change ear ring anot? last time the ear ring u bought during my birthday very nice mah.. my friends thought it's real one.. -.-" i bought those ear rings from citigem.. that means she think the ear ring is fake one lah.. *@#&@&
 
my MIL dunno i dun like her one.. coz i very nice in front of her one.. dats y i feel very miserable..

haha lost next time u buy something for her make sure tell her it's real one..

aiyo the sister work where.. dun ever go dat childcare centre..
 
Waa Jane.. Your mil so scary.. must let your hubby knows that you got different living habits and privacy is very impt esp after u r married..

One day if u you doing exercise how?? Last time my mil also like that.. at 1st come in without knocking.. then i tell my hubby.. then he told her off.. after that she knock and open immediately.. then we lock the door.. after that she knock and keep turning the door knob.. so irritating..

Then we moved just two doors away from her.. hubby gave her a pair of our keys.. then she always come over as and when she like.. Occupy my fridge..

Luckily my bro rent a room from me.. then she dun dare to come over.. But she like to ask how much my bro is paying me and i always reply her.. enuff to cover my bills.
 
sengkang :D hahahaa.. dun know where ah..

my HB scolded me lor.. tell me next time dun buy things for her.. so her birthday we just brought her to makan..
 
hahaha... mei....
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Keep track of expenditure cos, many of us have more impt things to spend on.... eg: shopping on honeymoon trips.. hahahaha......
 
Eunice : eee... i already granted access to my whole network leh... I am hopeless with the access rights in Multiply.. SCL was able to see leh.. dunno wat I did wrongly..

Sotonglet : I think you are already added leh..
 
jac,
well well, i know we all want d best for our wedding as it's once in a lifetime....so do wat u feel like doing rather than u regret :P i understand exactly how u feel cos i love to see myself pretty in pics too....my frens were really shocked by how much i've spent on my wedding so far....it's all $ dumped into d drain in their opinion cos they've been thru it :P
glad dat u've made up ur mind on d makeup, at least 1 more thing settled for u
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nelle,
hehehhe.....im now ur fat "twin"....save save save :P yah lor, i agree wif u, when i realised how much i spent on my wedding, i nearly fainted....wif juz helpers' APs, d $650 new notes i've changed r nearly gone....it's like sucking d daylight out of my bank acct :P
 
haha lsn, great excuse to go back taiwan again yeah. jus remb to avoid aug/sept, as taiwan is more prone to floods during dat period.

wah waxie, i dun see the wu hua guo nowadays le... this wu hua guo is the best taste lor. other brands just dun have the same taste. btw, have you tried the chinese medicine hall (yao cai dian)? maybe they still sell?
 
Lost = LOLz..best give her angbao for her birthday or else she will say ahh.. the food here expensive or not?

:P keke..aiyohh.. *shakes head*.. haha tt part abt the fridge.. one of my fren told me his Inlaw always like to come and cook dinner for him and his wife. So funi.. and said the mkt food so ex and not fresh, end up he every wkend must drive back loads of food to store for the week of cooking 0__0 i was like 'they scared u never feed their daughter well..'

keke , jane, why not u purposely leave the door unlock one fine day and let ur MIL oops and see u two exercise.. then she will get red eyes and learn her lessons!! hahaha...

wahh ur HB family so big! can all stay in the same hse! but is like my HB hse oso..big family..

Nw me and my HB stay in the master bedroom coz his hse got 1 grandma, 2 parents, 2 sisters..so 1 toilet is nt enough and since our master bedroom toilet face the main door towards the living room, we opt it out as a common toilet until night time. Then we put curtain to separate the room frm the 'corridor' to the master bedroom toilet.. they dont even dare to peek in and call for us when the curtain is closed but door is opened.. haaaaa...but we will lock it after certain timing and they must go use the kitchen toilet. So now they smart..must bath and do everythg by certain timing :P

sometimes must train them abit :P
 
meiling,
yes, at least i've made up my mind on the makeup....
now like on a see-saw; at times I'm firm on the decision to get another PG and at time, think I'll jus make do with this current one....anyways, i've sent out emails and see how it goes....

i think i won't go shopping during honeymoon (i hope!)....i jus wanna spend time with my husband then
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I wanna go South Africa for honeymoon!

actually, what is the rate for helpers? for me, i feel that for friends who helped out more, i'll give them more $$...is that ok? as in to give diff amount of AP $$?
 
ehh how come the sister is social worker but not very caring one?

maybe since young, ur HB doesnt play with her? So ermm she likes to do funi thgs to get his attentn?

sengkang ah.. siao.. i better make sure dont send my kids to the daycare centre.. i gg to stay in punggol next time :p
 
anyway hor, i thk my mum is doing the same thing to my da sao.. and i really pity her.. and coz she goes through the shit, so she pity me and envious tt my MIL is not like my mother.. haha hard times bring two 'victims' closer together :P

Maybe must build rapport with ur HB's siblings from the beginning so they treat u like own siblings also.. but i knw some mothers will add oil one la.. like my mum likes to talk abt my da sao and at first i really wronged my da sao.. until later i get to know my da sao better via msn and emails.. then i realised my mother really rubbish :P Thanks to the technology!!!

And me and my HB always go KTV and movie with his two sisters..tho i knw his older sis abit jealous of him coz my MIL dotes my HB more but then she still respect me one. Kinda of weird oso la.. coz me and his older sis same age.. somemore older in terms of mths lor....so i dont need to ermm 'greet' her...hehe...
 
jac,
heheheh....yah i understand, i had problem making lotsa decisions too....d price of PGs will b always going up n not d other way after they've built a portfolio....but den decided to save some $ cos i know after 1 yr of flipping, i think i'll simply chucked them in my wardrobe or storerm :P my albums r now collecting dust under my table :P
heheheh....if u decided to save on ur honeymoon shopping den go ahead to splurge on ur AD photos, for me i know dat i'll surely buy lotsa things if i managed to go on my europe trip so i try to cut some expenses....if only i own a mint den i can print more $ anytime :P
there's no mkt rate for APs, it depends on ur comfort level, d relationship n oso d amt of wk u delegated to them....for me, i give more to those who helped out for d whole day....den those who help either in d day or at nite will rcv less....
 
Phew. My MIL not that scary, FIL is the harder to deal one. He is those who will keep quiet when infront of everyone, but go home and complain to MIL. After he found out that we were using black tableclothes for dinner, poor MIL has to hear him nag nag nag. Now we having a headache with his table arrangements, he just cant understand that we got to arrange in tables of 10. His thinking is like just give out invitation and see who turns up. Faintz. Lucky SIL offers to help us to explain to him.

No matter how easy-going they are, we shifted out after our house's renovation is done. MIL at first did pop by our place every now and then (cos we just stay across the street). To 'prevent' that, we went over to their place for a while on most Sunday mornings, while on the way to buy breakfast.

Jolene: yaya. we going to chinatown this sunday. Will mostly go with hub's friend cos PIL not free. Will need to buy the barang barangs for An Chuan. The red bedsheets, lamps etc.
 
ohhh chinatown there got bedsheets? ehhh i bought mine at OG.. got black floral in maroon base can or nt ah? Keke.. oops..

ehh i thk my mother choosing those GDL thgs lor.. wah lau.. i thk my MIL abit buay tahan my mother nw... coz my mum first say simple can liao then my MIL said simple simple then, everythg give angbao represent then my mum's face turn black... then nw got to buy those thgs..and let her choose...my HB said he will 'entertain' my mother so as i wont explode when shopping together..

Nowadays i always say paiseh to my MIL and Grandma inlaw coz of my mum pattern..sighh lucky they understand.. i scared they dun like me coz of my mother.. sianz.. so must be sure i m a good DIL coz i dont intend to go hm very often after my wedding..unless to see my baby niece..

Kinda of sad.. my da sao hasnt due yet... which means both my da sao and my brother cannot attend my wedding.. so angry! My mother said even my bro cannot attend...
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upset.. i gg to say it out manz in my thank u speech tt i am sad my brother nt allow to attend my wedding :P hehe.. i m so evil...
 
Jolene: according to friend, they have the dragon phoenix bedsheet sets, about $50. Usually just buy those for the photo sake, then keep it. nah, wont be using it again, cos the colour will also drop after washing one. Your bedsheets are ok ah, just that hub wanted to buy the traditional ones.

FIL is say only need to return the cake and an angbao to them. What i am worried is later he say why only those items, where are the rest. Cos his decisions easily affected by others...
 
aiyah.. old ppl are like tt.. my mother at first oso okok until hear ppl say this and say that and ask for more and more and more thgs 0___0 and keep saying if never show the Inlaws I got backing, next time they will bully me...

lame...
 
i look everywhere le.. googled for it.. info show me that its a "tu can" of malaysia.. i might be able to find it there... before i go, i'll search spore first..
 
Sigh... let me rant her for a while... I have 7 jiemeis but for our so called very first gathering tml to settle on dresses, 4 cannot come. I have already let them know about this gathering 3 weeks ago le. Some of their reasons are valid but somehow I still feel sad lor.
 
Sigh... why old folks are so troublesome..

sometimes when i ranted abit of my in laws infront of my mum, she will said "what to do.. who ask you to stay with them before getting married" I just need her to console me instead of pouring cold water..

Pinky81, dun be sad.. just go ahead with the rest and arrange another one with the 4.
 
charma97 (charma97): I read about how your FMIL open the door really scares me! I really hope that she wont do that to me.

As for the jiemeis, washes my hands off already. I think I just make up my mind, settle a dress and that is it. For those who were absent, just get for them. Can't fit? -- Sent to tailor.
 
Hi charma97, I think you can still wait for about 2 more weeks to give out. I think it's alright to give early to relatives and close friends who have confirmed their attendance.
 
Wow!!! Thread is moving real fast...

Seems like there is quite some in-law issues now... As for me, I insisted that HTB and I get a house before the wedding as I can foreseen that there gonna be alot of problem if I stay with his parents... and am thankful that we got a unit last year (after our 3rd balloting)before the property hike.

Renovation is in the last stage... lovenest will most prob be ready 1 week before our AD. My relationship with MIL is so so lor... dun really say much infront of her... thank god HTB dun takes side and he not really that close to his mum. :D
 
Jane, the teaset n lamp which Idear included not bad de.. Quite nice also.. Ya lor, the guest book u're referring to is the one with ribbon also right? I think not very nice leh.. Hehe..

Jolene, i prefer Chinese MUA leh.. Cos malays features and us very different. Most of them got big deep set eyes, while ours small n maybe puffy. So make up techniques will be quite different. But depends on u la, if she did for ur dasao b4, n she's good, then still can try her.

We have the same situation.. Dont think my MIL is buying me anything also. But maybe my hubby's grandparents will give la.. Cos my hubby is closer to his grandparents since young. Then my hubby very sweet also. He say he will buy SDJ for me. But i say no need la, cos i know his financial standings now lor.. Hehe.. We must spend so much for wedding le...

So when's ur AD again? Sorry huh.. very diff to rem cos too many NOV brides here. Haha.. Mine is 27th and i also havent done up all my invitation cards.. Stress.. Must wait till next week when my hubby comes back, then can do it all together.

I think its ok for 1 or 2 tables to have 1 more pax ba. Just that the table will be more squeezy. But not too much tables la. Maybe just 1 or 2. Cos some tables will also hv 1 or 2 less ppl ma. Ya, really very diff to arrange the tables. Its like i know have to sit relatives close, but i also dont wanna place my friends far from me. Haiz.. Headache.. Then my mum's friends also. She say she wan good n nice tables. Argh...

I will be inviting my colleagues also. But not much la. Only limited to those in office. So still quite ok.

Charma97, my BS gave me both edited and all raw photos. Anyway, i took almost half of all the photos. So they was ok with passing me everything. Dont quarrel with ur hubby la. I always rem this saying, wedding night is just for a day, but marriage is forever. So dont quarrel, 'ren yi shi feng ping lang jing'.. Maybe u can use two angbao box? One u use pink colour, the other u use blue colour. Paste the words 'BRIDE' and 'GROOM' on each ang bao box.
 


Jane, thanks for sharing with us the meaning of the yum seng! I just looked at my Emcee speech and realised only got chinese meaning, dont have it in English. Faintz.

Jane, haha.. dont be angry la. Think ur MIL maybe heartpain u all spent so much money? N the fact that they went to do hair extension and eyelash extension means this wedding is impt to them too isnt it? U should be proud n happy! But only the part where they say as if they getting married abit erm... Haha.. Dont care them la! Be happy!! Its ur big day!!

I dont think they will take the ang bao too ba. Unless they very money faced kind? Only way is to tell ur Hubby to tell them not to take lor. Say need to cover for banquet.

Lost, i think i will go and buy the GDL stuffs with my hubby too. Then later then claim back. Easier la. N we can choose the designs we want too! Haha.. Lost, dont quite utd the part of passing ang baos to matchmaker. If we got to know each other thru my hubby's colleague, means we have to pass him ang baos? He's a guy leh. Can? N put in our new room? What if we dont have new room. Will still be sleeping in my own room then how ah?

And if we not buying pyjamas? I will only be buying new pair of t-shirt and jeans for hubby can or not? And this one is also paid by my mum?

Wah!! U very brave!! U talked back to ur MIL in that way?? Applause!! I think i'll nvr dare to do that. But good la! Now they nvr anyhow say things liao.. Good for u!! N ur hubby so sweet also. Always stand by u..

Charma97, i think ur MIL and aunty really very bad. How could they say that of u. Afterall, u only want the best for ur wedding ma.. Sigh.. dont be upset ya?
 
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