Singaporebrides | Weddings 101

June 2023

All the People You Don’t Need to Invite to Your Wedding

By Tansey Tang

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Trying to cut down your wedding guest list? In part two of our wedding guest list miniseries, we list all the people you don’t need to invite to your wedding!

When you’re working on your wedding guest list, it’s crucial to remember that this is your special day, and you have the freedom to choose who you want to share it with. We’ve looked at how to create the perfect wedding guest list in part one of our wedding guest list miniseries. The important thing is to prioritise those with whom you share meaningful relationships. While it may seem challenging to decide who should make the cut, there are certain individuals whom you don’t necessarily need to invite. In part two of our miniseries, we look at the 10 people you can cut from your wedding guest list without guilt.

1. Distant Acquaintances

You’ve met met countless people over the years, and you definitely don’t need to invite every single person you know to your wedding. Focus on inviting close friends, family members, and people who have played significant roles in your life. It’s fine to omit distant acquaintances who haven’t been a part of your journey.

2. Old Friends

You may have always thought your uni mates, or that secondary school best friend you hung out with every day, would be at your wedding. If you’ve since lost touch with them, you may see your wedding as an opportunity to reconnect. But it’s important to consider the practicality of doing so during such a busy event. Trust us, you won’t have time to rekindle a friendship in between the gown changes, the speeches, and the march-ins.

If you haven’t been in regular contact with someone, it may be more appropriate to plan a separate get-together to reconnect rather than inviting them to your wedding.

3. All Your Relatives

You might feel obligated to invite everyone to whom you’re related by blood, due to family or societal expectations. But if your venue has a smaller capacity, you don’t need to invite all of your distant relatives, especially if you hardly see them or wouldn’t even recognise them on the street. Let your parents know that you want to be able to spend time with the people who are important to you on your big day, instead of having to make small talk with people you don’t know. Remember that this is your wedding, and you have the right to prioritise your wants.

4. Everyone Whose Wedding You’ve Ever Attended

It’s not necessary to reciprocate every wedding invitation you’ve received in the past. If you’re no longer close with someone who invited you to their wedding years ago, it’s perfectly acceptable to exclude them from your own guest list unless they remain significant friends in your life. Before sending an invite, try reaching out for a catch up over coffee first. If they’re evasive, they probably wouldn’t mind being struck off your wedding guest list.

5. Plus Ones for Everyone

While offering plus ones is a lovely gesture, it’s not mandatory to extend this invitation to every guest. Be mindful of your budget and venue capacity when deciding who can bring a guest. Reserve plus ones for those in your bridal party, and for guests who are in committed relationships, engaged, or married. This way, you can ensure that your wedding remains an intimate affair and that you have the opportunity to spend quality time with each guest. Do stick to your plus-one rules though, or you’ll find disgruntled guests asking why someone got to bring a date and they didn’t!

6. Your Boss, Coworkers, and Professional Relationships

You see them every day, so wouldn’t it be weird not to invite them to your wedding? Unless you’ve known them a long time and they’re super close friends that you spend time with out of the workplace, it’s perfectly acceptable to exclude your boss and co-workers from your guest list. Remember, your wedding is about celebrating your personal life, and it’s okay to keep your professional life separate.

7. Your Guests’ Children

You don’t have to invite your guests’ children if you want a kid-free wedding. Let your guests know in advance if you’re not inviting children other than family or your flower girl and page boy, so they can make arrangements. However, a guest might be unable to or simply not want to attend because they can’t bring their child. You’ll have to respect their decision the way they respect yours to have an adults-only affair.

8. Anyone Who’s Pressuring You for an Invitation

Only you should get to decide on the people with whom you want to celebrate the biggest milestone of your lives! Some people might try to guilt or pressure you into giving them an invitation, but you don’t need to give up one of your seats just because someone is making you feel bad.

8. Neighbours

They may live next to you, but your close proximity doesn’t mean you’re close friends. Unless you’re really friendly with them, you don’t need to feel obligated to invite them to your wedding. You can simply mention that you’re having a small celebration if your wedding ever comes up.

9. People You Haven’t Spoken to in Over a Year

If you haven’t spoken to someone in over a year, are you close enough to them to invite them to your wedding? Chances are, you won’t miss them at your big day, and they won’t mind being left off your wedding guest list either.

10. Ex’es

Even if you’re still on friendly terms with your ex, there’s no need to invite them to your wedding. You don’t have to prove anything to them (and you shouldn’t care to!) and you don’t want to make your partner uncomfortable, or provoke any jokes or unwanted commented on the day that should be all about you and your relationship.

Drawing up the ideal wedding guest list can be a challenging task, but it’s crucial to prioritise the people who hold a special place in your heart. By focusing on close friends, supportive family members, and those who have played significant roles in your life, you can create an intimate and unforgettable celebration. Remember, your wedding day is about you and your partner, so don’t hesitate to make the tough choices that will keep your day a joyful one.

Feature image from Safira and Elias’s Dreamy Fairytale Wedding at Raffles Singapore by Colossal Weddings

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