Wife's EA...what should i do?

miloice

Well-Known Member
There is nothing so stupid of holding on. What is important is for yourself to come to the senses and realization on when to let go. That will take time, some longer than others. It is not what others telling you, its your life your call. No such thing as perfect decision or time for it, just have to think it through, make the decision and stick with it, else, you will be a roti prata tangoing with your cheating spouse that is equally willing to drag it on.
 


iccy

Member
To argue with u is a waste of time....the day his wife ever leave him or cheated on him till he get sick will be the day he wakes up...lending support is not rite especially knowing that his wife is clearly abusing him....Hopefully one day ur hubby abuse u the same way Hope4me is being abuse.....When the time comes, do come here and tell us that ur heart is so BIG that you accept him back....:D:D:D

Hahhaah tks for reminding me that :) and i see the reasons y ur wife rather cheat on you than stay true to you. Guess she took faster time to realised how ugly you are inside ...good for her huh ??? :D
 

iccy

Member
I am not married retard......can't wait for ur hubby to cheat on u......:D:D:D

:D oh you NOT ?? OMG :eek: what a relief to know no one fall for you, as you save hell lot people in this world and most yourself...else you gonna ended up crwaling here instead of me. :cool:

BTW, thank you for the wishes, taking in this wish if can help the other person see how ugly they are I think it worth every penny huh! Ohh sorry I think you too ugly to even know there's a big heart people like Hope4me and myself out there caused i bet you never have this people in your life such you ended so badly form :D PEACE.
 

uglydude

Member
At least i dun go around telling ppl that their partner cheating on them is acceptable....what comes around will goes around eventually...

And of coz a retard like u will have a big heart....every night while ur hubby is busy sleeping with other women....u are telling urself to forgive him each day...:D:D:D

What a big heart u have indeed....do remind him to use protection each time to prevent urself from contracting STD.....:D:D:D
 

sadman2009

Active Member
Uglydude,
Ironically, that was what I did before. I know she was fxxking with another man but I thought to myself may be she didn't this time... You kept giving yourself reasons to believe... In the end, it's just very stupid of me. Haha...
 

uglydude

Member
Sadman 2009,
What you did was perfectly normal.....my friend did something similar last time...he was always telling himself that the action his wife did was rite....giving himself excuses after excuses....there were even time when the wife did not come back home and he would tells himself nothing is wrong with that and there must be a reason for this happening....

In the end, when his wife left him....he initially blame himself and feels that it must be his fault that things come to such an end....but in the end like u he woke up one day...and realize it was never his fault....

The wife never did love him....simple as that....If a person love u....he/she will also care about how u feel....:D:D:D
 

tomasulu

Member
This hope4me is clueless. He pretends he wants advice but what he really crave for is affirmation to (continue to) be stupid. Group hugs and kumbaya and all is well, hooray!
 

EzRaynE

New Member
*In order to love another person, you must first love yourself.....:D

Exactly what I told those who confided in me on r'ship issues. Unfortunately, none so far are able to accept that truth.

@tomasulu Even if he is craving for affirmation like you said, what is it to you? He has no one to talk to, more like he can't tell anyone he knows in real life. If this is the place which can serve as an outlet to him, then so be it. Please put yourself in his shoes, going through that pain, the stress level. At least he's finding help, people to talk to rather than keeping everything inside. Bottling everything inside is a no-no. Pain and stress can lead to depression which eventually leads to suicide. You can choose not read.

To TS, I sympathized what you're going through but I believe you already know what to do. If you're still unsure, why don't you write on a paper; pros & cons. To be honest, I'm quite shocked to know that many women stray. I've always known the fact that women strays too but I thought it as a rare occasion. I've always believe that it's easier for men to cheat due to so many temptations. All I can say about this is that, these women have never been with bad men that's why they can't appreciate a good man. They think it's easy to find a good guy to settle down with. Immaturity could be one of the reason. Anyway, all the best to you. Even if the worse happen, look on the bright side. Perhaps, He has a better plan for you.
 

miloice

Well-Known Member
To be honest, I'm quite shocked to know that many women stray. I've always known the fact that women strays too but I thought it as a rare occasion. I've always believe that it's easier for men to cheat due to so many temptations...

humm.... interesting, men stray with who? Women no?
People do not just stray because of temptations but more to fill the void or simply craving for variety. Temptations are always around, nothing is really changed about that. Society evolves and women are much more financially independent. Values and priorities are not the same and our ladies are much more dominant. Guys on the other hand, some have really became domesticated.
 

miloice

Well-Known Member
You can listen to orangepie if u want.....after all a woman will say everything to protect them women....but if u ever have the guts to walk out of your cheating wife....few years down the road...u will 100% feels stupid for everything tat you have done...

Putting urself before ur wife is plain dumb...that is loving her first before loving urself....if u want to carry on to be a dumb oaf by all means....for all you know...your wife maybe screwing the guy behind ur back...wun be surprise if she comes back one day and bear the other man's child...but dun worry a dumb oaf like u dun mind helping another man raise his kid....:D:D:D

don't quite agree that its dumb to love our partners before ourselves. I strongly believe that a truly working relationship will have both parties doing just that. However, the dumb part is when one is not selective to who they do that with. With someone that really loves and cares for you, it would be wonderful. To someone that clearly cares for their own interests before you, then, its just opening yourself to endless exploits and hurts. Anyway, we all make stupid decisions in life. What's important is learning those lessons and how to pick up the pieces and move on from it. These lessons cannot be really taught, no matter how clearly put right in the face of those that choose to be blinded.

My personal take, nothing so foolish to give a marriage and relationship a second chance but its always 2 to tango. If you are playing solo, then you need to have a reality check and red flag to stop yourself from sinking too deep further in. When that final straw is reached, there is no turning back. Else, you will be roti prata man kenna toss and flip in a vicious cycle for eternity.
 

spenguin

New Member
hi hope4me, your love for your wife is amazing. it must take a lot for you to still protect her when she has failed to keep her vows. that said, you've been married 15 years. i want to scoff at some people here that aren't even married, and telling you to move on....its never so simple when you're married, is it?

i read a lot of threads here of men who have been cheated on. and the one common factor in all of them is that they all claim to be a super husband who' does housework, picks up wife, cooks, etc.' Although these are very sweet gestures, unfortunately, many women don't feel loved by these alone. maybe in the past, but not in modern day context. a modern wife wants a husband who talks to her, shares his fears, laughs with her, shows adoration for her, listens to her.

for example: i think your wife tolerated your family for 15 years and maybe you should have listened to her concerns earlier on, and done something proactive about it. only now that she has interest in another man, do you pull out your guns and tell her you're willing to move.. she probably doesn't like that you only act under such dire circumstances.

that said, i think there's still hope4you. show her more affection.. ask her out on dates, etc. a woman just needs attention and love.

i hope she realizes how wrong she is to break her vows, and you guys come out of this stronger. :)

p/s: agree with the others who voted for marriage counseling!
 

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