Wedding Traditions

C

cowmoo

New Member
hi all, what are the wedding traditions that must do and ones that can be optional (E.g: Gate crash, etc.)

We are hoping to skip some of it to save time/$.

Which are must do and optional?
- Betrothal (guo da li) gifts: not doing
- dowry
- new PJ and slippers before combing hair ritual
- combing hair ritual
- gate crash: not doing
- Opening of door by a younger brother/ relative
- eating a bowl of rice balls
- paying respect to deceased parents/grandparents
.
.
.
etc.
pls add to the list. Thanks.
 


Actually i consulted feng shui master before that all traditions can be skipped. The important is not to miss the auspicious timing and which zodiac will clash with u (they can attend the wedding but not as helpers) which u need to follow strictly.

I felt only one of the traditions that is impt is the tea ceremony. Which personally i felt is a respect to the elders. Im skipping the hair combing, an chuan and my GDL is only giving ping jing & wedding cakes.
 
I see... Thank you for the info! I'm thinking of skipping most parts. Making it a very simple and hassle free wedding for us and people involve. But definitely will have tea ceremony.
 
Meaning that fetching of bride also can be skipped? Just look for a location for tea ceremony and proceed on to banquet?
 
Actually i personally think it's up to individual beliefs. Since both sides for me are ok with skipping the traditions, we are only doing the tea ceremony which i think its very important. Others like GDL, pin jing, gatecrash etc... not doing.
 
Okay we're quite similar to yours :) we don't have GDL, pinjing, gate crash, pre wedding photo shoot.
Will still be doing the tea ceremony and fetching of bride and after these go straight to hotel as mine is a lunch wedding. Time is tight.
 
so you all mean we can skip certain things ?
we thot of GDL and hui li with only certain items like:
pig trotters can
dragon phoenix candles
1 dozen of oranges
gold bangles (FFIL decided to get it for me since he don't give any pinjin)
baby's essentials (potty, bath tub and spitton)
wedding cakes
money for pants / shoes
Angbaos for his entire family
Tea set
Bowl set
2 bottles of F&N orange juice
2 bottles of Martell VSOP
angpaos for bride mum (diaper angpao?)

i thinking of leaving out:
Pin Jin
Bedside lamps
combing hair ritual
new pj and slippers

can?
 
I think it depends on your parents and his, especially if traditions are very important to them. For us they let us make the decision as they don't follow anything, or mostly we decided then "informed" them haha. If both sides parents are ok to skip certain things, then skip them unless you and your htb want it. Can save you some effort and money too.
 
Yes, it depends on both side parents.

All traditions can be skipped as is a belief.

For fengshui belief, the only important tat cannot skip is :
- the timing that the bride step out the house and by what time she has to reach the groom hse

- the timing that must complete tea ceremony

- the timing for rom.

- the zodiac that clash with u both and parents sign

The rest can skip, including GDL, ping jing, hui li and an chuan.
 
I will be following: - the timing that the bride step out the house and by what time she has to reach the groom hse and the zodiac that clash with u both and parents sign

Don't think will do GDL (Actually I also don't know what goes into GDL package), as for dowry, maybe just gold for myself.
 
My sister skipped everything except for Tea Ceremony too as my parents and her inlaws were ok with it.

We just all met at the hotel, got dressed, had the tea ceremony, did the ROM and had a nice lunch.

Thinking of doing the same but don't know about my inlaws... :P
 
Hi ladies,

I've a problem here.

Let's say my BTO completes in June next year, key collected, renov done, ROM in July, can I move into my new house with my HTB then?

My AD is in Dec thou. So a day before my AD, I plan to go back to my old house so my HTB can jie me in the next morning from my old house.

But now my mum said its 'weird' for me to stay in my new house before the AD.

Haiz.
 
I think is ok, quite a few of my friends are doing tis, shift in when the house is ready den go back to parents hse before wedding day
 
vonneylove said:
Hi ladies,

I've a problem here.

Let's say my BTO completes in June next year, key collected, renov done, ROM in July, can I move into my new house with my HTB then?

My AD is in Dec thou. So a day before my AD, I plan to go back to my old house so my HTB can jie me in the next morning from my old house.

But now my mum said its 'weird' for me to stay in my new house before the AD.

Haiz.
Click to expand...

I have a colleague who is the circumstances as you..

He stayed in his own flat with his then fiancée however they did not slp in the master room or the new mattress upon his parents request..

As his wife is not a local.. So he had his gatecrash and tea ceremony at the hotel room..
 
vonneylove said:
Hi ladies,

I've a problem here.

Let's say my BTO completes in June next year, key collected, renov done, ROM in July, can I move into my new house with my HTB then?

My AD is in Dec thou. So a day before my AD, I plan to go back to my old house so my HTB can jie me in the next morning from my old house.

But now my mum said its 'weird' for me to stay in my new house before the AD.

Haiz.
Click to expand...


Actually it's the same for me. I ROM first cos I need to get key to my BTO, moved and living in the new house now. My wedding is in Jan, so the eve night I'll return home and continue with the usual like fetching of bride, go to in-law house for tea ceremony then back at mine for another tea ceremony then to hotel.

For us, we will think since ROM, already considered legally married, so should be able to live together. My parents were okay with me moving to the new house before having the traditional wedding, if not renov liao and never live in so wasted!
But also have to depend on your parents what they prefer.
 
thinking of skipping the fetching of bride & going to groom's house, so everything done in hotel (simple gatecrash, tea ceremony, luncheon).. wondering if there'll be any impact? im not very particular though
 
cowmoo said:
hi all, what are the wedding traditions that must do and ones that can be optional (E.g: Gate crash, etc.)

We are hoping to skip some of it to save time/$.

Which are must do and optional?
- Betrothal (guo da li) gifts: not doing
- dowry
- new PJ and slippers before combing hair ritual
- combing hair ritual
- gate crash: not doing
- Opening of door by a younger brother/ relative
- eating a bowl of rice balls
- paying respect to deceased parents/grandparents
.
.
.
etc.
pls add to the list. Thanks.
Click to expand...

Hi, is eat tan yuan, not rice balls. One more thing to eat too, mian xian. I heard that is sweet de (but i not sure is at bride or groom side). Tea ceremony? What about an chuang?
An chuang:
This is a process whereby changing the couple’s bed with new bed sheets and have auspicious items spread out on the bed along with 2 red packets and a pair of double happiness bedside lamps. Double happiness stickers or cuttings will be used to decorate the bridal house, the main door as well as mirrors and cupboards of the bridal room. No one is allowed into the room until the wedding ceremony is over.

And during ur actual day, get kids to jump on your bed!
 
haha oh yeah tang yuan ( not rice balls - oops)
We are pasting stickers on doors and master bedroom mirror and placing a couple of small Xi lamp at the bedside. Other than that, we are not doing already.
Keeping it simple :)
We got not young kids to jump for us! so not doing that too.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Back
Top