Need advice: should stay with parent after married?

[summertimegladness]

Hi all, I'm new here. Just hope to get some practical advice on what to do with my mum. (Btw, I was raised by my mum in a single-parent family)

My mum doesn't like my HTB's personality but she knows he is a good guy and treats me well. I'm the only child and my mum does not have a house of her own. My HTB is also very apprehensive to stay with my mother now. (He actually told me no)

Initially we were planning to have my mum stay with us since she can and is agreeable to take care of our household chores, cook for us etc. But recently, things turned sour between the 2 of them and I'm feeling a lot of stress from both sides. I think I did a bad job in managing the relationships.

So now I am lost of what to do:
1) Try to persuade my HTB (difficult to persuade) and let my mum stay with us (which i foresee might not work well in the long term)
2) Not let my mum stay with us, make other arrangements for her (which i think will worsen the relationship with my mum, become very distant etc, I'm very close to her, maybe too close...)
3) Persuade my HTB to allow my mum make her decision (to stay or not stay with us), and try to work things out from there
4) Any other advice?

On top of these, I've been praying for wisdom and intercession from God..

If anyone has faced similar challenges, hope you can share your experience and advice here. Thank you..

 

[life_is]

Leave and cleave. Best arrangement is to stay nearby and not under one roof. A marriage is where the spouse is the top priority, not the mother. An understanding mother would understand. If she is lonely can always make friends outside or hang out with relatives and friends. As people age they should realise that if they hold on to their children for dear life, they will ruin their children's lives and these people will be lonely for life later on because others won't trust them to be marriage material. If you can't leave and cleave, better not be married at all until your mother passes on. Just to be pragmatic.