ordinarygirl
New Member
why do men like to lie? he can be so sweet to u in front of u, but once u not around, he lied. Asked him where is he, he lied. why?
LIES
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miloice
Well-Known Member
because he is a liar.
The same with women liars too. Liars are not specific to a gender one.
But, if you want answers, look deeper, reflect. Sometimes, people lie to avoid useless confrontations. Are you one of those gf that always call to spot check on where he was?
Before, anyone starts get defensive, I'm not assuming anything. just suggesting areas to ponder and reflect about. Search within for the answers.
The same with women liars too. Liars are not specific to a gender one.
But, if you want answers, look deeper, reflect. Sometimes, people lie to avoid useless confrontations. Are you one of those gf that always call to spot check on where he was?
Before, anyone starts get defensive, I'm not assuming anything. just suggesting areas to ponder and reflect about. Search within for the answers.
Q: why do women like to blame Men in general when it should be Their Choice of that 1 Man which disappoints them?
A: becos deep down, they dun wanna blame that 1 man, nor their choice... it's easier to pin it on the general populous of Men, so that later they can forgive their 1 Man and 1 Choice and carry on with that 1 Man and 1 Choice after that 1 episode.
A: becos deep down, they dun wanna blame that 1 man, nor their choice... it's easier to pin it on the general populous of Men, so that later they can forgive their 1 Man and 1 Choice and carry on with that 1 Man and 1 Choice after that 1 episode.
and let me go 1 step further to tell u straight that u will not leave this man now nor in the near future... u will prob forgive him, "give him one last chance", and basically just hold on begging him to stay if he ever decides to leave...
from experience, women who blame "Men" Often, often run into the more relationship problems than women who actually blame just 1 man.
from experience, women who blame "Men" Often, often run into the more relationship problems than women who actually blame just 1 man.
may_be_divorced_soon
New Member
Rebecca,
Both men and women lie and I have seen a fair share of both male and female liars, so dun over-generalise.
Like what Milo has said, your man could be lying because:
1) he is a liar or
2) he has through past experiences realise that telling the truth to you may lead to unnecessary fights, accusations etc. Personally, if my other half is always probing or if I know that telling him the truth will lead to unnecessary confrontations, I would lie too.
Think through it and if you honestly feel that you have not done anything mentioned in part 2, then he could be a habitual liar. You would then have to decide if you want to stick to a habitual liar for the rest of your life.
Both men and women lie and I have seen a fair share of both male and female liars, so dun over-generalise.
Like what Milo has said, your man could be lying because:
1) he is a liar or
2) he has through past experiences realise that telling the truth to you may lead to unnecessary fights, accusations etc. Personally, if my other half is always probing or if I know that telling him the truth will lead to unnecessary confrontations, I would lie too.
Think through it and if you honestly feel that you have not done anything mentioned in part 2, then he could be a habitual liar. You would then have to decide if you want to stick to a habitual liar for the rest of your life.
ordinarygirl
New Member
I can quote a few egs here...sometimes he would say he's meeting his friends at this place say for eg. Marine parade...then a while later when I called, he say he's at Jurong. I was puzzled as we juz parted at say Bishan. And the funny part is when I called him on the phone after we parted, he dint ans or call back. I mean why is it so difficult to tell the truth? I'm not the unreasonable type. And the best part is I think someone else is in his car during that period when he dint ans my call.
ordinarygirl
New Member
And he's always "lying"...Like when he's at home, he would say he's somewhere else. When he's coming to fetch me, he would say he's not ready yet; only to appear at my doorstep a few minutes later. How do live with a liar?
may_be_divorced_soon
New Member
Rebecca,
If you have done some self reflection and you are sure that you have not done anything unreasonable to result in his perpetual lying, then like what sm has said, leave him if you can't take it. If not, this same question will keep coming back to haunt you everytime you discover that he is lying.
If you have done some self reflection and you are sure that you have not done anything unreasonable to result in his perpetual lying, then like what sm has said, leave him if you can't take it. If not, this same question will keep coming back to haunt you everytime you discover that he is lying.
I told my ex-hubby before...we are husband and wife, if there are any good things or bad things, we share the burden SO...tell me ANYTHING despite I might be upset but at least DUN LET ME BE THE LAST TO KNOW...and yet he still did cos he dunoe how to make me feel better if he announce the bad news to me...I think he din even try and he gives up already lor...He lied to me about his job...about his debts...about everything...only after ROM then I know...gosh...
Like powder kor said, I do give him chance and chance...and for 2.5 yrs later, I give up...and eventually learnt to end all these torments... -.-
Like powder kor said, I do give him chance and chance...and for 2.5 yrs later, I give up...and eventually learnt to end all these torments... -.-
miloice
Well-Known Member
Rebecca,
wah leow.... this kind of 'lies', u also angry.
Frankly, I don't like the idea to be pressurized to meet some timing and deadlines like this too. Simple stuffs, we cut ourselves some buffer time when picking up our partners. This kind of things also angry. Lady, u need to grow up.
About lying to be busy when he is at home. I suspect you are breathing too closely down his neck all the time. Cut him some slack and time to be alone. Be it to rest, with friends, laze at home etc. And when he needs to be outside with friends, do you expect him to draft an agenda and send out to the group beforehand. Make them commit to the schedule and plan. And no matter what happens, schedule should not change??
No right? OR, do you expect him to provide you live updates on the progress of his appointment with his friends and also some GPS system to track him?
Its not difficult to understand why he doesn't want to tell you too much. Because, he will be so busy managing your interrogation from your micro management of every movement.
"I can quote a few egs here...sometimes he would say he's meeting his friends at this place say for eg. Marine parade...then a while later when I called, he say he's at Jurong. I was puzzled as we juz parted at say Bishan. And the funny part is when I called him on the phone after we parted, he dint ans or call back. I mean why is it so difficult to tell the truth? I'm not the unreasonable type. And the best part is I think someone else is in his car during that period when he dint ans my call."
If would dump a gal if she is this unreasonable as to expect me to answer the damn phone without fail when driving. Lady, u r damn unreasonable! Each time you see any 'inconsistency', the conclusion is already that HE IS LYING. You are sounding really young and naive.
wah leow.... this kind of 'lies', u also angry.
Frankly, I don't like the idea to be pressurized to meet some timing and deadlines like this too. Simple stuffs, we cut ourselves some buffer time when picking up our partners. This kind of things also angry. Lady, u need to grow up.
About lying to be busy when he is at home. I suspect you are breathing too closely down his neck all the time. Cut him some slack and time to be alone. Be it to rest, with friends, laze at home etc. And when he needs to be outside with friends, do you expect him to draft an agenda and send out to the group beforehand. Make them commit to the schedule and plan. And no matter what happens, schedule should not change??
No right? OR, do you expect him to provide you live updates on the progress of his appointment with his friends and also some GPS system to track him?
Its not difficult to understand why he doesn't want to tell you too much. Because, he will be so busy managing your interrogation from your micro management of every movement.
"I can quote a few egs here...sometimes he would say he's meeting his friends at this place say for eg. Marine parade...then a while later when I called, he say he's at Jurong. I was puzzled as we juz parted at say Bishan. And the funny part is when I called him on the phone after we parted, he dint ans or call back. I mean why is it so difficult to tell the truth? I'm not the unreasonable type. And the best part is I think someone else is in his car during that period when he dint ans my call."
If would dump a gal if she is this unreasonable as to expect me to answer the damn phone without fail when driving. Lady, u r damn unreasonable! Each time you see any 'inconsistency', the conclusion is already that HE IS LYING. You are sounding really young and naive.
green_tranquility
New Member
Even his mother won't track his locations all the time.
rebecca, he cheated on you before ah? that's why u're tracking down his movements all the time? if you have an issue over trust with ur bf, might as well dump him.. since u can't even trust him.. BUT, that is IF he cheated on you before.. if he didn't.. i think you're the one with a problem..
ya.. not answering the phone when one is driving.. why must it be "there must be another person in the car"?? why can't it be.. "there's a TP car beside his car, so he can't answer the phone" ??
when he said he's somewhere.. why is it he's lying? how do u even know?? why can't it be.. he's really where he told you he is..?
i think ur head is full of negative thoughts leh..
when he said he's somewhere.. why is it he's lying? how do u even know?? why can't it be.. he's really where he told you he is..?
i think ur head is full of negative thoughts leh..
texasholdem
New Member
i support rebecca!
alcifertoh
New Member
Ask skylar to donate her 40FF cup lah. Can use as helmet too. Frequent calling can be irritating. Especially just call and ask for the so purpose of "where you?" "what you doing?" which too much frequency of it no longer qualify as concern but nuisance.