How many of ur parents r biased?
- Thread starter sasha_ger
- Start date
powderful07
New Member
Not more than 2 I hope...
sgbabydoll
Active Member
Powderful, I laughing till cannot stop hahahahaha
green_tranquility
New Member
If threesome, then 3 parents? 
powderful07
New Member
Green, that's so politically uncorrect...
Better apologise before you get flamed by the crusaders...
Better apologise before you get flamed by the crusaders...
green_tranquility
New Member
Powerful,
Hey we must give credits to all 3 involved in the baby-making process ok!
Hey we must give credits to all 3 involved in the baby-making process ok!
powderful07
New Member
But that is Ssssooooo incorrect...
Can you be nicer in your wording?
PS : now, I think we really screwed up this thread...apologies...
Can you be nicer in your wording?
PS : now, I think we really screwed up this thread...apologies...
green_tranquility
New Member
Ok I'll be nice and give my reply to the thread topic.
Both my parents are biased. I'm fine with it because nothing is fair in this world. Do we need to be so calculative towards our own siblings and parents? Comparing and comparing endlessly only make myself more miserable and doesn't change the reality.
Both my parents are biased. I'm fine with it because nothing is fair in this world. Do we need to be so calculative towards our own siblings and parents? Comparing and comparing endlessly only make myself more miserable and doesn't change the reality.
powderful07
New Member
wow. I wasnt expecting that.
That's a good post. Serious.
That's a good post. Serious.
sasha,
u wanna be specific? biased against who/what? choice of bfren? husband? your choice of education? your choice of career?
need to establish the above first, before can go further to address the issues. as it is, i feel tat everyone have their bias/prejudice, it's something tat's been around for centuries and quite human. education and exchanging ideas can cut down the amount, but can never totally eradicate it.
u wanna be specific? biased against who/what? choice of bfren? husband? your choice of education? your choice of career?
need to establish the above first, before can go further to address the issues. as it is, i feel tat everyone have their bias/prejudice, it's something tat's been around for centuries and quite human. education and exchanging ideas can cut down the amount, but can never totally eradicate it.
ya, extremely...
perhaps, old folks still prefer son over daughter? anyone face similar exp?
for those who r aldy a father/mother, will u ever forgive ur son if he chased you out, sell ur house & take the $$$? dun care if you will have a shelter over urself after that.
if u all were me, will u ever forgive such sibling who treat our parents like this?
perhaps, old folks still prefer son over daughter? anyone face similar exp?
for those who r aldy a father/mother, will u ever forgive ur son if he chased you out, sell ur house & take the $$$? dun care if you will have a shelter over urself after that.
if u all were me, will u ever forgive such sibling who treat our parents like this?
haven't got to tat stage yet, but already making plans to kick my kids out instead. so your situation is to do with sibling/parents thingie?
personally i think forgiveness is something tat comes with age... the older u get, the more likely u've seen things and let bygones be bygones... u tend to realise tat u have a part to play in the decisions and if they come back to haunt u, so be it. seeking vindication will perhaps be thru other means, rather than a downright hatred and lotsa anger.
i think seeking maintenance via legal is the way to go, so focus on tat first. while u're affected, remember tat u're 3rd party to the emotions tat shuld be felt, even if the impact might also be direct. so seek the maintenance first.
it's sad, and definitely i will feel anger and hard-done. perhaps even at a loss... it's like a LL feeling with anger.
it's sad, but i do see alot of parents selling their houses to share one with their kidcs when they marry, particularly some condos or higher-end HDBs... it's so predominant tat when i walk to condo launches, agents can blatantly suggest i get my parents to sell their house to chip in for the downpayment. seems the way to go for some pple...
u dun have to forgive your siblings, but u have to learn to deal with the bitterness in yourself. dun let it eat u, or worse - cripple u.
personally i think forgiveness is something tat comes with age... the older u get, the more likely u've seen things and let bygones be bygones... u tend to realise tat u have a part to play in the decisions and if they come back to haunt u, so be it. seeking vindication will perhaps be thru other means, rather than a downright hatred and lotsa anger.
i think seeking maintenance via legal is the way to go, so focus on tat first. while u're affected, remember tat u're 3rd party to the emotions tat shuld be felt, even if the impact might also be direct. so seek the maintenance first.
it's sad, and definitely i will feel anger and hard-done. perhaps even at a loss... it's like a LL feeling with anger.
it's sad, but i do see alot of parents selling their houses to share one with their kidcs when they marry, particularly some condos or higher-end HDBs... it's so predominant tat when i walk to condo launches, agents can blatantly suggest i get my parents to sell their house to chip in for the downpayment. seems the way to go for some pple...
u dun have to forgive your siblings, but u have to learn to deal with the bitterness in yourself. dun let it eat u, or worse - cripple u.
green_tranquility
New Member
Sasha,
If I'm you, I'll focus on finding a place for parents to stay and treat them better to soothe their wounds.
If I'm you, I'll focus on finding a place for parents to stay and treat them better to soothe their wounds.
sasha,
So what if your parents are biased.
I always believe how we treat our parents should be from our heart. If our siblings don't treat our parents that well in our eyes and yet our parents seemed to be even biased towards them - so be it. I don't really care. I just know that I need to be true to be heart and give my parents what I want to give them and not in comparison to what I have received from them in the past.
You will be happier this way. Don't compare. Just be true to your heart. And if you can't bring yourself to be that magnanimous at least learn to see more open.
You shouldn't hate your siblings .. what will hatred give you?
So what if your parents are biased.
I always believe how we treat our parents should be from our heart. If our siblings don't treat our parents that well in our eyes and yet our parents seemed to be even biased towards them - so be it. I don't really care. I just know that I need to be true to be heart and give my parents what I want to give them and not in comparison to what I have received from them in the past.
You will be happier this way. Don't compare. Just be true to your heart. And if you can't bring yourself to be that magnanimous at least learn to see more open.
You shouldn't hate your siblings .. what will hatred give you?
gracelourdes
New Member
sasha, as it is, all the fingers on our hand r of different lengths...similarly likewise, u can't really expect to be treated equal by your parents...they r humans afterall...there's bound to be differences...
i guess having said tat, u can't choose ur parents either...well, since tat's life, u just got to live with it...respect ur parents to the most of ur ability n just leave it since there's nothing u can do abt the biaseness part...
i guess having said tat, u can't choose ur parents either...well, since tat's life, u just got to live with it...respect ur parents to the most of ur ability n just leave it since there's nothing u can do abt the biaseness part...
like sm said, i did wat i shd do, he threw all of us out of the hse, i take loan, bought a flat & hse all of us, he dont provide for the parents, i did, for past few yrs i scrimped & saved to provide for the family with my pitiful pay.
but seems that no matter wat i do, i still cannot pls them. to them, only their son is gd.
i cannot choose own parents, but wat they do really hurts me. wat i hv done is like wasting my effort, not even recognised. sad
but seems that no matter wat i do, i still cannot pls them. to them, only their son is gd.
i cannot choose own parents, but wat they do really hurts me. wat i hv done is like wasting my effort, not even recognised. sad
happinessbliss
New Member
Sasha < my father is a typical old man... he prefers my brother... when we were younger he only pays for my brother's sch fees... i ended up coming out to work at 14 to earn my own sch fees... but that still does not appease him... he chase me out from the house when i was 17 cos he says i am a jinx and cos him to lose $$ everytime he gambles...well i move... but the next thing i knew he reported me to the police and says that i runaway from home... i got into alot of trouble cos of that. After the CID check records they realise that i was a abused child (yes he beat me up everytime he gambles and lose $) and so they applied for a protection order for me and obtain a grant from court that I am able to take care of myself and stay out on my own when i was 17...cos I am below the legal age...
I did not talk to him for 14 yrs after that. Just my AD, i invited him cos afterall he is my father, and i stupidly thought that after these yrs he could have change... but guess what he almost ruin my AD... he ask for all my relatives ang pow to be given to him... cos "he brought me up" and cos he is marrying "his daughter" off... I'm like WTF... when he chase me out did he ever think that i am his daughter? Now that I am marrying he suddenly realise I am his daughter?? but to cut the story short, my MIL was really nice and says to give him the ang pows, what is short for she will bear... and I gave it to him... till now i do not talk to him again...
BUT having said that, if u r saying that I am lucky cos i do not need to give him monthly allowance... I am paying his debt for him... he owes somebody a loan of almost 50 thousand. I am paying for that loan cos he call me up and beg me to help him a couple of yrs ago... and i am still bearing it now...
What I can say is to leave yr life well and let them knw that with or w/o them , or whether they are bias or not... WE ARE STILL LIVING OUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST.... Life is full of ups and downs and not always a bed of roses... just take things into stride and solve 1 thing at a time... i'm sure things will work out...
I did not talk to him for 14 yrs after that. Just my AD, i invited him cos afterall he is my father, and i stupidly thought that after these yrs he could have change... but guess what he almost ruin my AD... he ask for all my relatives ang pow to be given to him... cos "he brought me up" and cos he is marrying "his daughter" off... I'm like WTF... when he chase me out did he ever think that i am his daughter? Now that I am marrying he suddenly realise I am his daughter?? but to cut the story short, my MIL was really nice and says to give him the ang pows, what is short for she will bear... and I gave it to him... till now i do not talk to him again...
BUT having said that, if u r saying that I am lucky cos i do not need to give him monthly allowance... I am paying his debt for him... he owes somebody a loan of almost 50 thousand. I am paying for that loan cos he call me up and beg me to help him a couple of yrs ago... and i am still bearing it now...
What I can say is to leave yr life well and let them knw that with or w/o them , or whether they are bias or not... WE ARE STILL LIVING OUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST.... Life is full of ups and downs and not always a bed of roses... just take things into stride and solve 1 thing at a time... i'm sure things will work out...