(2010) 2010 Brides


happygal> hmm..thanks for the advice! I'm so going to pester Kevin to let me book my date. When is your wedding btw? Kevin is so firm even during our meetup my bf keep asking him. Maybe we nv mentioned we are willing to place a deposit.Hmmm..the power of $$
 
Hi Thomas,

Sorry to hear about the sad news.My condolences to you. Do take gd care of yrself so that u will be in turn able to take care of yr wife n FMIL.

As for the custom, i thought it suppose to be if want get married, supposed to be within the 100 days?If not, got to wait for 3 years? I am abit confuce...that what i know from my mum when my grandma passed away then...

U probably want to check with yr relative when everything is more or less settled?
 
Thanks blue_diamond

Apparently it seems that generally this 'rule' is what most ppl claim to be, but there are others who proclaim otherwise. Guess it's a matter of how pantang the individual family is.
 
Hi Thomas,

Totally agree with u. Such matters are really up to individual liao lor...most impt..it u n yr fw familes take on it.
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As long as everyone decide with the go ahead...then just go with it.It up to everyone of us to believe....if u want to have a peace of mind, then can go temple to draw lots lor...hehehe..that just my suggestion.
 
thomas > im so sorry to hear that..sigh..it's heartening to see you still stay strong for your FW..please take good care of yourself and FW so that you can also be strong for the rest of the family
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Hmm I agree, it depends on how pantang your family is..and what her family feels is the best timeframe..
 
yIng3r

Lol, i tot e price is quite cheap le? I dono lei. Cos b4 that I looking at fullerton..
Cfm lose till xiao de..

Den I saw Meritus ballroom, love it so much.
At least wont lose so much if compared to fullerton..
 
hahah diane, i will see how cause my bf dun want too exp per table.. and also budget too.. fullerton? ya, u will lose till xiao...

then now u considering where for ur wedding dinner?
 
blue diamond: prob we will just consult a shifu to have peace of mind.

agon-e: thanks, it's not easy for her too, just wished I could do more for her
 
hi natelyn,

i hope kevin wont scold me for 'spoiling' market. actually by putting deposit, we r also putting ourselves at disadvantage. but at least we secure the date we want. i was worried that once it is open for booking, someone else might fight w me for e date i want. my AD is 12 Dec. and u know there are only so little weekends in a month. dec is supposed to be a popular month for weddings too. everyone is in e holiday mood i think? haha....

thomas,

from what i know, it is within 3 months or at least 3 years. unless, it is grandparents and quite old like 80 yrs old, then dun need to follow cos they are considered 'lucky' already so dun need to mourn. also this applies only for paternal grandparents. if it is maternal, i heard dun need to mourn also. for ur case, as it is ur FW's father, so by right need to follow. but can shorten e 3 yrs by taking 2008 as the first yr, then 2009 is second yr. so 2010 is the third yr and can get married le. dun need to follow exactly 3 yrs. also actually it is u and ur family who is 'supposed to mind'. cos it is like supposedly 'bad luck' so depends on whether ur family or relatives pantang or not to want to marry ur FW before 3 yrs. this is what i heard before la...
 
Happy Girl: thanks, we are planning to hold our AD in 2010 as originally planned...let's just hope that what you said is true
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yIng3r,

I considering Meritus lo.. You were asking bout the Mandarin Court Ballroom which I am interested in Meritus.

You wanna try Furama Riverfront? Should be not bad. Quite cheap also, but min for Jupiter Ballroom (their smallest ballroom) is 20 tables..

I dono which wedding show should u go, i am going none cos especially for Meritus, their wedding show perks is not for 2010 weddings. So sianz.. Rather stay home lo.. Since I already view the ballroom le..
 
diane: furama riverfront heard my bf's bro say the food not very nice.. and kind of inconvenient for those who are not driving.. i am still considering which one to go..

Happy Girl: ya it is more expensive.. high class or not i dun really care much.. the most important is we feel comfortable with the place and convenient for our guests..as most of them not driving, and we also got elderly too..
 
y1ng3r, if u r asking for good location, convenient, gd food, gd service = expensive banquet... Fullerton is a very great hotel if u need all e above criteria mention...
 
thomas > i think you are already doing the best you can
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by being there for her every step of the way, spending time with her and her family even in his last days..by proactively asking around for suggestions on how to proceed with the wedding
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is she holding up well? i remem you shared with us she was already really upset (and understandably so) when things started to take a turn for the worse
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diane: fullerton jus kind of too expensive for us..
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i dun need all the above criteria..
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will look out for the some other places.. but will keep meritus in my shortlisted list 1st..
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Thomas> Think you are already very sweet towards your FW and her feelings.. Just stand by her and she will feel it..

Diane> I dun find fullerton food nice though.. haha.. But definitely ex.. The ballroom is fantastic!!

ylng3r> I find the food pretty bad at furama riverfront as well..

Anyone who has ROMed wrote their own vows? Memorise the vows by hard or just recite after the JP.. Got Mr Chia as my JP.. Very happy.. =)
 
booy: haha..tats 1 reason y i din get mrs chia..hahaha..coz i will be stressed out by writing own vows...my fren got mrs chia thou..heee..they had a paper in their hands..ahha..and read frm there..lolz..
 
yIng3r, yeah I tink Meritus really very not bad le.. I quite have that in mind just that wanting for their 2010 wedding show lo,,,

Booy, when is ur AD? So fast can find JP!?
If I nov 2010 den AD, should I find JP now?
 
Booy & Sharlene: you all make me suddenly remember i need to get a JP on my wedding day as i will be having rom together... stress...
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Booy: ya, my bf's bro say the food not nice.. lol..

maybe will choose fu lin men like alicia.. lol...
 
Diane: i also cannot make any decision due to haven't view the places as well as the price list not out for many places...
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Sharlene> Mr Chia says I can choose to write own vow or just use the default one.. So now thinking.. I also afraid that I will get panicky and forget any memorised vow.. hee..

Diane> My ROM is in Mar 2009.. AD in 2010.. So must start to get a JP liao..

ylngr3> If your AD and ROM are in 2010.. You can start to get JP in maybe 3 to 6 mths before AD... Some JP dun allow you to book too early.. Just like hotels.. haha
 
Booy: i am jus worry i will forgot when i prepare everything for the wedding and miss out the JP.. hahaha

Btw, any BS recommendation ma?

Anyone going for the Bows show 2009 ma?
 
booy - yes.. finding a place very headache one lor!!

Thomas - my condolences to you and your FW.

I am looking at Noble House by Tunglok to hold my AD in 2010.. not sure if its good and if they got 2010 booking open. Maybe I need to check with them once my AD date is finalise.
 
ylng3r> Create a spreadsheet to list down the tasks.. And set a timeline to get those things done.. Then you won't forget loh..

I'm with Sophia Wedding.. Quite a few brides here chose My Bridal Room, which I think it's good as well.. I'm going for BOWS.. Registered liao.. Free and has goodie bag..

Jocelyn> Tunglok food is always quite decent.. Ate there once and the food was quite nice.. Check it out after you confirm your date... =)
 
booy > re: wedding vows..I think I will end up writing part of my vows..cos fiance wants to write..so I kena gotta write part of mine too..heh..there are some sites you can go to to get some inspiration on what to write..HTH!
 
Morning all!

agone> Thanks.. Will research a bit on the vows.. My bf is just the opp. Dun really keen on writing his own vow..
 
All> Morning!

Jocelyn> I've been to Noble House for a dinner a few mths back. The food is ok, some are nice. The service is excellent.

xiaofeizhu> Happy Bdae! How's ur Jap course liao ah?
 
Booy, urs is only not keen..

Mine wanna skip e vows part.
He is basically not interested in a wedding.

I honestly dono y should I hang myself in this forum the whole hr/min I am up (except slpin) researching for this & that. Yet he is relaxing all e way.

Jus a proposal he can get so angry abt! I dono if he is e 1 I wanna be with..

Recently many thing has happens..

Just e past 2 days, we quarrel again & again but of cos as ever he always claim 'he is nv @ fault'

U all c if he got fault not la:

This is what happens. On Saturday, we went to a Railway Mall meeting a seller to get MacBk remote control from him (as my bf bought e MacBk frm him but it comes w/o e remote control so we needa meet another trip to get such a stupid remote control)

I am ardy quite not happy that we needa made another trip dw but I am alrite & ok with it. We reach Railway Mall. The seller is late so I suggested eat CoffeeBean Brownie. But coffeebean is full (not really full, but there were like couples sitting in those 4-seater seats).

So I ask him 'Why not we share wif others?'

He reply is: 'WHY DO U ALWAYS LIKE TO SHARE?!'

Gosh, if he don1 2 share he can jus say: 'Don1 la, baby I don wanna share'

Simple, but why he have to blame it on me that is I like to share?

Fine we ends up leaving Coffeebean (not happily). We waited for e seller. He is late.

I keep my mouth shut due to not happy his attitude in Coffeebean. There he is expressing his whatever damn issue to me! I am not interested to listen either. Den he exclaimed:
'WHY CANT U WAIT!?'

Gosh is e seller who is late. I am not angry with e seller but his attitude to me in Coffeebean!

Seller is late but his attitude is Why cant i wait when normal reactions should be like 'Oh, the seller aint punctual, is ok, we just wait awhile more c c lo'..

No matter what, he is blamin me for everything.

On sun, a huge quarrel happens.. I feel that he has taken me for granted. Whenever we quarrel, he always msg/msn.. Is so stupid. Cant he call or solve face-to-face?

So I always called him but resulted in his constant hangin on me.
Is like we talk talk talk till halfway he hang up cos he nt happy! But i dono he has hang so I continue to tok for that min he hang b4 the telephone tone toooooooooo... But What can I do?
I call & repeat e whole thing I have said aft he hang! + I am angry he hang so we gotton worst & worst!! But we settle tat nite with him promise me not to threaten or hang up again.

Ytd, Monday he did again..

He has done many ting behind my back like, we started 1+yr ago, b4 we even started, I ardy ask him to quit smoking in which he say he did...

Up till recently I caught him smokin in e toilet when I am at his hs!! He has e cheek to do it even when I am at his hs! What do u all expect when I am away!? He promise not to do it again..

But again last wk or e wk b4 last, I caught him e 2nd time smoking again in his hm toilet!

He blame all on me tat I force him to quit.

He even go what stupid 'tagged' (something like frenster) ask for girl's contact like 'Hi, can I have ur contact?'..

He did that just few days aft our 1st yr anniversary!! But he claimed that he didnt contact those girls even after I find out a msn contact of his is one of the girls (Char) contact he asked in 'tagged'. I search his call list, there is a number of one of the girls (Kar) number he asked in 'tagged'.

He claimed that he nv contact. He jus added Char in msn & jus call Kar (but jus call & hang) so tat e no is in his call list.

I dono what m i gonna do..

Alot of u know that fren & relative object me marrying so young.. But despite so many objection, I stand right up on my stand..

But he is getting bad to worst especially e past few month with the past 2 days as e final attack..

I am so sick...
 
Morning all !
this tread is moving v. fast ! cant follow up man.. hee..
btw, are ur htb very keen in all this wedding issue? emm.. mine is always busy.. r u girls planning on ur own??
i feel tat those traditional wedding can make us feel we are really getting married, but he thinks is a trouble... he say might as well take the $ to travel... wad u girls think?
i wanna feel the happiness in going thru the process, being a pretty bride..
but he feel mafan,he say spend so much money for 1 day..
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wenzi:I believe alot of guys feel the same as ur HTB...mine also like tat..always on his work n interests..he wanted juz ROM will do. Just told him off on Sun nia that he totally bo chup wedding stuff...hahaha
 
Diane> It does seem like his fault.. However, it might also be some other previous issues or your tone/reaction that is causing such big reaction and unwanted behaviour from him. But besides pinpointing who is at fault, why not ask yourself if there is anything that both of you need to change to make your relationship better.. Different people has different expectation of others, but not all people can reach your expectation.. Talk to him nicely and try to adjust both of you to reach a compromised state..

Quarrels are inevitable in a couple no matter if you are in a relationship or marriage.. It seems like your quarrels are the more serious ones which are related to respect for each other and trust.. These are the key things that is very crucial in a relationship/marriage… The fact that you are marrying at a younger age, a lot of things you might not be able to handle properly.. These usually comes with age and experience.. However, there are still exceptions that people marrying young and can still maintain their marriage well.. However, the key thing is that both of you need to work on it together as marriage is about both of you…
 
Diane> Did ur bf agree to get married in 2010? Coz i tink most guys dun 1 2 get married young. My bf same ting, a few yrs ago, i asked him abt planning for our marriage, but he said he's not ready, but tis yr july, after his dad passed away, mayb tat's wen he really tink tings thr & wen i tok abt planning for marriage, he agreed.

Wenzi> My bf not really interested in the 1st place even tho he agrees we shld b planning to get married. But i tink coz our ROM is getting near, so he's not so repellent on tis subject as compared to last time. Now he's more willing to tok abt tis topic & ask qns. He oso excited wen his mum told him she dun mind us not having a banquet & stuffs & jus go ROM den honeymoon, after honeymoon den hold a buffet reception to "announce" our marriage, but i dun 1 it tat way. I 1 2 haf a banquet & we're having a church wedding as well. So i tink ya, most guys will tink of jus use the money on other tings like hse reno & travel, they seem not too keen on holding a banquet, mayb coz it's too ex, but luckily my bf still respects my decision of having a banquet.
 
diane > agree with booy and alicia..generally guys don't like to get married young. Sometimes it is also about a person not ready to give up his or her individual lifestyle as a single person at that point in time. My situation was the other way around, I actually did not see myself getting married at all, and actually called off a previous relationship when the topic of marriage was brought up. But I suppose my current bf made big enough a difference (not to mention tons of patience over a couple of years, lol!) to convince me otherwise
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I suppose age also made a difference. It is a huge sacrifice, to give up things you are used to as a single person to join your life with someone else's, but as I got older I slowly began to accept the idea of doing so. Another important thing to consider is that if the person doesn't make an effort to change now, he or she is most likely not going to change after marriage..but like Booy said what's most important is the both of you recognise there is something crucial to be sorted out..a wedding is just a day but a marriage is for a lifetime. Sorting these issues out first will really help in the long run
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Booy, perhaps u r rite. In e past (like e 1st few month when we r tgt but that was like 1 yr+ ago), I did not treat him v well.. But that was e 1st few mth..

Ya he really did not respect me. There are really many more stuffs like very sensitive issue... But is really nt approriate to discuss in forum.. Problem occurs always is bcos when he wanna solve, i don wanna solve; when I wanna solve, he don wanna solve.

Alicia, my bf 1 2 get marry in 2010. Even nw quarrel till so big I tell him to call off wedding or postpone his reply was 'den what for still stay tgt if no future' His thinking was that we still have 1yr+ to tink of our marriage. But no, that is not the case. We will need spend more like BS, AD VG etc that need to pay.
He is not young anymore, I am e 1 hu is young.

Agon-e, he isnt young anymore.. Ya u r rite. I have change alot alot for him.. I quit clubbing for him, I did not hang up the phone aft I promise him nt to, I solve thing asap after he say not to drag arguements, I even break off contact with my drinking fren (those were really very sincere frenz of mine but just that our favourite pastime is drinking). He range them as 'bad frenzz'. But no matter what, for his sake, I break off e contact w those he don like ardy.
 
diane & wenzi.. i would say tt guys normally wont feel so excited about planning e wedding.. coz e feel tt its still early n there is more den enough time.. but den i try my best to do my owe research n update him on wat i have knw n explain to him tt tis will help us lessen our worry if we do our hmwork well.. n everyone worse fear is to do last min stuff which will cause misunderstanding as well.. so slowly my bf oso gradually will tk part in it whenever i mention stuffs to him..

diane.. i will feel tt ur bf is abit bad temp.. n b4 e both of u planning on marriage did he realli wants to settle at this young age?? n u might wan to tell him about his bad temp n make him try to change for better..

alicia.. ur rom date fixed??
 
Diane> I tot u say ur bf 24 tis yr? Settling down at 26 years old, to a guy is still considered young, but put aside the age, coz every1 is different. I too agree wif booy & agon-e, tink it's best to sit down & tok tings thr. Last time my bf will oso hang up on me, but not during quarrel, coz we dun quarrel much. He usually hang up wen he's done toking, eg, wen he's bz & i called, he'll jus say "I'm bz now, call u back later" den hang up, w/o me toking & saying "bye", wich i dun like. I find tat's it's ill-mannered for not waiting for the other party to say "bye" b4 u hang up, so i'll call him back immediately & scolded him for not waiting for me to say "bye" den hang up. So now he din do tat alr.
 
HappyFairLady> Sort of fixed, but still waiting to efile the date tis sat, coz i heard ppl say ROM at registry, the date very fast ppl snatch de, so i'm keeping my fingers crossed so tat i can take tat date. If i really cant take the date tat i 1, den i'll haf to find my own JP & ROM outside the registry lor.
 


Diane: cheer up. Hmm.. u really need to know if he is the one.. or when he does something, u know he is the one.. u are still young.. it's really okie to marry young.. but u must be sure he's the one.. i have friends who marry at 22 or 23.. it's perfectly fine..

For mi, i have been with my bf for 8 yrs le.. coming 9 yrs in Jan 09. We started when i was in JC. It's until recent yrs when i was 23 / 24 then i am sure he is the one..=)
 
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