(2010) 2010 Brides
- Thread starter eevee
- Start date
alicia_yong
New Member
cymk> i tink if guy side gif eg 5 tables, the guy side will haf to fork out the $ for the 5 tables wich was given to the gal's side. Den if the gal side not enuff & need another 2 tables, the $ for the 2 tables will haf to fork out by the guy's side.
Alicia - I also 1st time heard about the ang pow for our own mama. But I think if we can, y not? she carried us from day 1 in her tummy and brought us up fm baby and even still cares about us now.
cymk - actually quite subjective. If our parents understand our financial status (we are not very rich) and they requested for tables (which paid by the guy's side), the ang pow collection usually will pass to the couple to cover the cost so to minimise the financial burden. On top of that parents already got the pin jin anyway.
cymk - actually quite subjective. If our parents understand our financial status (we are not very rich) and they requested for tables (which paid by the guy's side), the ang pow collection usually will pass to the couple to cover the cost so to minimise the financial burden. On top of that parents already got the pin jin anyway.
his_fairlady
New Member
wow looks so confusing.. me n fh actualli discuss that he will give pin jin & bethrol to my parents n as for the ang bao we collect from the dinner will b use for our dinner.
but for some might have to give back parents(depend on inividual)
but for some might have to give back parents(depend on inividual)
his_fairlady
New Member
ya.. means both side agree.. for my case i have spoke to my parents bout it so they r okie wif it =)
Finally its Friday.. Yeah!!!
Finally its Friday.. Yeah!!!
alicia_yong
New Member
Actually for my case, i still not sure yet whether there will b any bethrol to my parents or not. For my sis, my mum say to post out cake vouchers (instead of ordering & delivering the cakes to each relative of bride's side) wif invitation cards to bride's side relatives. So they nv mention of any other gifts, like bethrol & stuffs, so i oso dunno whether for my sis's wedding will there b such gifts given to my parents.
alicia_yong
New Member
mm&pw> Thanks! U enjoy ur wkend too!
his_fairlady
New Member
alicia dun worry.. we still have time for all tis.. now we shall sit back relax abit do more research n when e time gets nearer we wont b so headache =)
happy wkend to all..
happy wkend to all..
alicia_yong
New Member
Vivi> Ok! But will need to guide me through lor... Keke! Happy wkend...
foodietravel
New Member
For my wedding, I recall there was <u>'nappy' ang pao</u> from my hubby to my mom. There was also <u>'shoes and pants' ang pao</u> from my mom to my hubby. The 1st was to thank my mom for bringing me up. The 2nd was in substitution of the actual shoes and pants which is supposed to replace the chopped up Roast Pig (not suckling pig hor) when my hubby brought me home for the tea ceremony on Actual Day morning.
The <u>Whole Roast Pig</u> was carried into the house, the mid section is chopped off. Then the head and tail was returned to my hubby's side. In between is a big piece of red paper 'wrapping' the hollow mid section and the red pkt (for shoes and pants) is left inside.
Below is and excerpt of my prev post.. where i was briefed the basics of what to buy and do on both Guo Da Li and Actual Day. The Guo Da Li stuff such as toothbrush/paste, mug, baby bath tub etc... were all paid by me. Not paid by groom.
"But i bought most of my stuff from Cheok Keuw Bridal Co at Blk 506 Jurong West St 52. Clara is super helpful and explains everything. I think she's only in in the afternoons. She'll ask what your dialect is and recommend but not push the items."
<u>Ang Pao Box/es</u>
To each his/her own.
We only had 20 tables, easy to know which guests' red pkt from which side. Pin jin was $5K to $8k. If groom gave too little, seems like no face. If bride's side take too much (i,e return a little) then seems like very greedy. So the amt was discussed first. As for Tables Given: My parents requested for only 5 tables since each table was abt $1200. So my hubby gave $6k. The rest my parents wanted, they offered to pay the add'l tables. If not, looks like my parents unreasonable. The total amount collected from ang paos - all came back to us- the wedding couple - because we bear the total cost. Btw, only one ang pao box (my parents and his mom agreed on one ang pao box instead of 2 cos they didn't want guests to think that either of the families seemed calculative (ha ha).. But it's actually very ok to have 2 boxes.
Kerine,
you've ROMed.. Gd for you. Yes, Prof Yu wasn't spectacular but even though we all agreed for an English ceremony, upon realising my MIL doesn't speak Englsih, immediately made it a point to converse in Mandarin & dialect so that she was more comfortable...So happy faces all round... Congrats!!
The <u>Whole Roast Pig</u> was carried into the house, the mid section is chopped off. Then the head and tail was returned to my hubby's side. In between is a big piece of red paper 'wrapping' the hollow mid section and the red pkt (for shoes and pants) is left inside.
Below is and excerpt of my prev post.. where i was briefed the basics of what to buy and do on both Guo Da Li and Actual Day. The Guo Da Li stuff such as toothbrush/paste, mug, baby bath tub etc... were all paid by me. Not paid by groom.
"But i bought most of my stuff from Cheok Keuw Bridal Co at Blk 506 Jurong West St 52. Clara is super helpful and explains everything. I think she's only in in the afternoons. She'll ask what your dialect is and recommend but not push the items."
<u>Ang Pao Box/es</u>
To each his/her own.
We only had 20 tables, easy to know which guests' red pkt from which side. Pin jin was $5K to $8k. If groom gave too little, seems like no face. If bride's side take too much (i,e return a little) then seems like very greedy. So the amt was discussed first. As for Tables Given: My parents requested for only 5 tables since each table was abt $1200. So my hubby gave $6k. The rest my parents wanted, they offered to pay the add'l tables. If not, looks like my parents unreasonable. The total amount collected from ang paos - all came back to us- the wedding couple - because we bear the total cost. Btw, only one ang pao box (my parents and his mom agreed on one ang pao box instead of 2 cos they didn't want guests to think that either of the families seemed calculative (ha ha).. But it's actually very ok to have 2 boxes.
Kerine,
you've ROMed.. Gd for you. Yes, Prof Yu wasn't spectacular but even though we all agreed for an English ceremony, upon realising my MIL doesn't speak Englsih, immediately made it a point to converse in Mandarin & dialect so that she was more comfortable...So happy faces all round... Congrats!!
happygirl198230
New Member
hi gals
for my case, my parents most likely going to ask for 10 tables and they will keep angbows collected fr tt 10 tables. will also be asking for pin jin. not sure how much but my mum did say since they already asking for 10 tables so will ask for less pin jin. though i understand tt the guy side reserves the right to decide on e amount of pin jn given, it is of cos safer to discuss first so as to make everyone happy.
my dad was saying tt of we need a loan, can let him know. but i know for my mum, i know she is those typical auntie tt will insist on having those angbows and pin jin so tt she can feel happy and maybe glad tt she can marry her daughter well. i told my sis tt we need a lot of money for house n wedding. guess what? my sis says "aiya then why u want to get married so fast? save up more first mah. mum also says u r getting married quite fast."
so hearing tt, i dun think i can count on my family to be understanding as they probably feel tt we can wait and save more instead of complaining to be poor. sigh. i envy girls who have understanding parents.
maybe becos my sis is older, not married, no boyfriend and not worried while i hv only dated bf for 1 yr n we r getting married (but that's in 2 years' time) so they feel im too fast. they all know my bf is a decent guy though.
i know money can be earned and tt giving a few thousands to my parents for bringing me up is not a lot. i also know tt it is better to make my parents happy and please them rather than make them unhappy if their wish is not fulfilled.
but i just dun understand some points still so can someone pls enlighten me? why does my bf have to like 'buy' me in order to marry me? this is not like olden days anymore whereby the wife hv to serve her husband after marrying him. after marriage, i expect my bf to be good to me and take care of me like i will take care of him. so why does he need to 'buy' me and thank my parents while i do not have to use money to thank his parents for bringing him up?
my parents know me and him are paying for the wedding and house ourselves. though the pin jin and 'tables' given will be out of his own pocket, but it will simply means tt he will hv less to contribute to our funds. dont understand why my parents wanna make things difficult for us. sigh...
for my case, my parents most likely going to ask for 10 tables and they will keep angbows collected fr tt 10 tables. will also be asking for pin jin. not sure how much but my mum did say since they already asking for 10 tables so will ask for less pin jin. though i understand tt the guy side reserves the right to decide on e amount of pin jn given, it is of cos safer to discuss first so as to make everyone happy.
my dad was saying tt of we need a loan, can let him know. but i know for my mum, i know she is those typical auntie tt will insist on having those angbows and pin jin so tt she can feel happy and maybe glad tt she can marry her daughter well. i told my sis tt we need a lot of money for house n wedding. guess what? my sis says "aiya then why u want to get married so fast? save up more first mah. mum also says u r getting married quite fast."
so hearing tt, i dun think i can count on my family to be understanding as they probably feel tt we can wait and save more instead of complaining to be poor. sigh. i envy girls who have understanding parents.
maybe becos my sis is older, not married, no boyfriend and not worried while i hv only dated bf for 1 yr n we r getting married (but that's in 2 years' time) so they feel im too fast. they all know my bf is a decent guy though.
i know money can be earned and tt giving a few thousands to my parents for bringing me up is not a lot. i also know tt it is better to make my parents happy and please them rather than make them unhappy if their wish is not fulfilled.
but i just dun understand some points still so can someone pls enlighten me? why does my bf have to like 'buy' me in order to marry me? this is not like olden days anymore whereby the wife hv to serve her husband after marrying him. after marriage, i expect my bf to be good to me and take care of me like i will take care of him. so why does he need to 'buy' me and thank my parents while i do not have to use money to thank his parents for bringing him up?
my parents know me and him are paying for the wedding and house ourselves. though the pin jin and 'tables' given will be out of his own pocket, but it will simply means tt he will hv less to contribute to our funds. dont understand why my parents wanna make things difficult for us. sigh...
happygirl198230
New Member
hi M,
so it means ur parents took 6K (cost of tables) and pin jin of 5K fr ur hubby? did they return any part of the 5K? or is 5K the nett sum after they returned some to ur hubby?
so it means ur parents took 6K (cost of tables) and pin jin of 5K fr ur hubby? did they return any part of the 5K? or is 5K the nett sum after they returned some to ur hubby?
happygirl198230
New Member
someone was asking bout visioworks photography?
my friend is using them for AD this dec. i think the package was ard $1900 nett. includes PG and VG. they threw in free montage and express highlights fr dunno PG or VG. i will ask her if they r good aft her AD.
i emailed overthemoon too. seems good. but bf said wait till we finalized our ROM venue b4 meeting up w the photographer... hmmm i want to book asap leh!!! wait the photographer is booked liao how!!??
my friend is using them for AD this dec. i think the package was ard $1900 nett. includes PG and VG. they threw in free montage and express highlights fr dunno PG or VG. i will ask her if they r good aft her AD.
i emailed overthemoon too. seems good. but bf said wait till we finalized our ROM venue b4 meeting up w the photographer... hmmm i want to book asap leh!!! wait the photographer is booked liao how!!??
happygirl198230
New Member
oh yeah sorry yeah din post anything last few days. was really busy. those of you who can see my profile in friendster will know my job. hee. Shhhhh....
foodietravel
New Member
Happy Girl,
My hubby gave on GDL day
a) $6000. in one red packet which states Number of Tables.
b) $x,888 in another red pkt which states Pin Jin. My mom opened THAT red pkt in front of all those who are present and counted the money. She then took $x,000 and returned $888 to him. But the amt is usually discussed 1st!! If not, can get misunderstanding or embarassment.
I guess it's not so much the notion of your HTB gonna 'buy' you over
My hubby's from single parent family so he had to save enough to 'buy' me over. And i think i was considered 'cheap' (ha ha). I think that from any parent's point of view, they want their little girl to be in gd hands, ie, no need to worry about expenses after leaving nest. When they 'find' a FSIL who can 'afford' to 'buy' their precious little girl, it's like telling the world that she's not marrying just ANYONE. Aiyah, something to that extent.
My hubby gave on GDL day
a) $6000. in one red packet which states Number of Tables.
b) $x,888 in another red pkt which states Pin Jin. My mom opened THAT red pkt in front of all those who are present and counted the money. She then took $x,000 and returned $888 to him. But the amt is usually discussed 1st!! If not, can get misunderstanding or embarassment.
I guess it's not so much the notion of your HTB gonna 'buy' you over
My hubby's from single parent family so he had to save enough to 'buy' me over. And i think i was considered 'cheap' (ha ha). I think that from any parent's point of view, they want their little girl to be in gd hands, ie, no need to worry about expenses after leaving nest. When they 'find' a FSIL who can 'afford' to 'buy' their precious little girl, it's like telling the world that she's not marrying just ANYONE. Aiyah, something to that extent.happygirl198230
New Member
yeah my parents said if they need more tables then they will pay for the extra tables themselves.
i always tot this is the usual practice till i hear fr some of the others tt their parents will return the angbows collected to e couple.
my colleague advised me tt even if my parents want to return e angbows collected, i shouldnt take it. in case they feel bad when friends or relatives asked them next time.
i always tot this is the usual practice till i hear fr some of the others tt their parents will return the angbows collected to e couple.
my colleague advised me tt even if my parents want to return e angbows collected, i shouldnt take it. in case they feel bad when friends or relatives asked them next time.
happygirl198230
New Member
hi M,
thanks for your advice. i guess our parents also get 'peer pressure' fr friends and relatives so they will want some form of pin jin and tables fr e groom's side to show tt their daughter is married properly lor. fortunately my bf's friends n cousins mostly had to give their wives' parents some pin jin and tables so it did not come as a surprise to him. but STILL, i wish i didnt hv to deal w the demands of my own parents...
thanks for your advice. i guess our parents also get 'peer pressure' fr friends and relatives so they will want some form of pin jin and tables fr e groom's side to show tt their daughter is married properly lor. fortunately my bf's friends n cousins mostly had to give their wives' parents some pin jin and tables so it did not come as a surprise to him. but STILL, i wish i didnt hv to deal w the demands of my own parents...
foodietravel
New Member
Happy Girl > my pleasure.
his_fairlady
New Member
hi happy girl & M ...
thanks for sharing.. it realli helps =)
thanks for sharing.. it realli helps =)
Happygirl>>My mum oso those Typical auntie...zZzz... everything is $$$ in her eyes... so headache lah... pin jin duno wanna give her how much lo... i c M put at least 5k to 8k.. Wow... thats alot man! and $$ for the table that guys side give for our side oso collected by my mum... i dont noe my mum will return some to help us on our wedd or to take all..zZzz
Pity my bf have to reali spend alot of $$ for wedding...
u've emailed to Mr Neo(overthemoonfoto)??
i have take him as my ROM PG le..
u can sae i intro de... u will get discount...
Alicia did ask the quotes for AD too.. =P
M>> is it a must to give the no of table $$ on GDL day??? As my BF will settle the whole bill for wedding dinner bqt itself and of cost the no of table given to our side the ang bao will be collected by my mum... so on GDL we only gonna give her pin jin and dinner nite she will collect the ang bao... issit ok? quite blur liao lo...
Princess>> have u send to me le mah?
Pity my bf have to reali spend alot of $$ for wedding...
u've emailed to Mr Neo(overthemoonfoto)??
i have take him as my ROM PG le..
u can sae i intro de... u will get discount...
Alicia did ask the quotes for AD too.. =P
M>> is it a must to give the no of table $$ on GDL day??? As my BF will settle the whole bill for wedding dinner bqt itself and of cost the no of table given to our side the ang bao will be collected by my mum... so on GDL we only gonna give her pin jin and dinner nite she will collect the ang bao... issit ok? quite blur liao lo...
Princess>> have u send to me le mah?
foodietravel
New Member
Miss Vivi > happy to share!
DnA > No need to settle no of tables $$ on GDL day. Up to both sides agreement.
My GDL was more than a mth before my AD cos Qing Ming in between and if give cakes/invites during QM, older folks get offended (something like sending them to gr-ve).. Sigh. We gave early cos don't want to forget to give it. And don't want to lose the cash too.
More imptly, some other couples give early ... because parents cannot change mind later and ask for more if they find out that their relatives give extra on wedding day.
DnA > No need to settle no of tables $$ on GDL day. Up to both sides agreement.
My GDL was more than a mth before my AD cos Qing Ming in between and if give cakes/invites during QM, older folks get offended (something like sending them to gr-ve).. Sigh. We gave early cos don't want to forget to give it. And don't want to lose the cash too.
More imptly, some other couples give early ... because parents cannot change mind later and ask for more if they find out that their relatives give extra on wedding day.
his_fairlady
New Member
haha.. tts a good idea.. but i guess normally b4 the GDL will have to discuss wif parents see how much pin jin they wan den e rest of e $$ will be use on the dinner unless some ang bao collected have to give back to parents (depends on inidividual)
alicia_yong
New Member
Happy Girl> So sorry to hear of ur dilemma. I'm sure wen the time comes they will b more understanding. Coz we still haf 2 yrs to go, so mayb towards ur AD, they will b more excited & anticipating the day. Dun worry abt it now. They need time to get used to the idea tat u r getting married. Pls do let me noe of ur fren's comments on visio. Thanks!
M> Actually wat is GDL? Wat r the tings to prepare & wat r we expected/supposed to do on tat day? Thanks for all those advises u gave us. It really widen our knowledge on traditional wedding.
Happy Girl & deerixp> For my case, i tink since my dad ask for 10 tables, wich he told my sis for hr wedding, & the other time i told him my rough gauge on no. of tables, he oso mention my wedding he will oso ask for 10 tables from FH side, i tink dey anyhow oso muz remain as 10 tables, coz my parents no savings of their own, so even if they exceed 10 tables, the extra $ will still b paid by us, the couple. But i will see how on my sis wedding 1st.
M> Actually wat is GDL? Wat r the tings to prepare & wat r we expected/supposed to do on tat day? Thanks for all those advises u gave us. It really widen our knowledge on traditional wedding.
Happy Girl & deerixp> For my case, i tink since my dad ask for 10 tables, wich he told my sis for hr wedding, & the other time i told him my rough gauge on no. of tables, he oso mention my wedding he will oso ask for 10 tables from FH side, i tink dey anyhow oso muz remain as 10 tables, coz my parents no savings of their own, so even if they exceed 10 tables, the extra $ will still b paid by us, the couple. But i will see how on my sis wedding 1st.
foodietravel
New Member
Alicia >
GDL or Guo Da Li i think means betrothal. Chinese way of saying engagement. Not sure though. But it's pretty interesting and it has nothing to do with any religion. It's a Chinese custom which free thinkers, Christians, Buddhists etc all follow.
The girl's side spends more for GDL in material stuff.. The guy's side spends more for GDL in terms of monetary stuff (Pin Jin and also on Number of Tables).
Prior to GDL day,
I already bought 2 tea sets, 2 pairs of Dragon Phoenix candles, 2 stand-alone mirrors which can see from hair to chin (& 2 red combs) amongst other stuff to be discussed below. Mirrors and combs are to be used for hair combing ceremony. I married out so i needed a mirror to be placed on the table which faces a door ... My hubby marries a wife into his household so he needed a mirror to place on a table which, when he sits down facing the mirror, his back faces the door. Our hair combing session was 11:05pm the nite b4 AD (must be after 11pm since Chinese calendar and time is ALWAYS 1 hr ahead of English clock!) whereas mine was only after his was completed (ie 11:30pm). Some people have the hair combing thing done on AD morning.
On GDL day:
Hubby (and matchmaker if any) brought to my parents place:
2 bottles hard liquor (no wine hor)
which we gave back 2 bottles of F&N rose syrup
18 oranges in a basket (must be even number)
which we returned 9 oranges
Stacks of cakes (looks more festive than cake vouchers; and cakes are cheaper too at less than $10/box)
which we returned some boxes for him to give out to his relatives
1 red packet for the Number of Tables
1 red packet for Pin Jin
We didn't want jewellery but some Mother-In-Laws do give DragonPhoenix bangles or SiDianJin to the bride.
We didn't have pig trotters (canned or fresh ones) since we just wanted basics.
Then my family (from my pocket lah) on GDL day, gave my hubby 2 sets toothbrush/paste in 1 mug, sewing kit, baby bath tub, tub for washing face, spittoon (haven't figured what to do with that yet), 2 packets of red dates/dried longans etc, and 1 tea set (for tea ceremony on his side). My parents dowry to us included bedlinen, electrical appliances which were given earlier and left at new bridal bedroom.
Most of the items are to symbolise that i'll be able to take care of my hubby, have children, take gd care of them too.. In olden days, without certain items, a groom going back to his home without such stuff, would result in friends & relatives thinking he's marrying a bride who's not 'capable'. These are only hearsay. But since my hubby and I just wanted to follow tradition and have a gd start, we just did the basics. I certainly didn't buy everything available!
I bought my GDL stuff from
Cheok Keuw Bridal Co
Blk 506 Jurong West St 52
#01-180 Spore 640506
Tel: 65660311
Clara Pay (usually in after 1pm)
If u tell her your dialect group and your hubby's dialect group, she'll advise you what to buy but she's very friendly, not pushy at all. So no obligations.
Impt: when the GDL gifts exchange takes place (we checked for auspicious date AND timing also.. but not nec), the bride-to-be is not supposed to see the fiance or even come out to see what's going on (eavesdrop can). If not, it seems to your hubby that you're a greedy bride You can only come out of your room AFTER he leaves. So i never saw my hubby on GDL morning.
In the afternoon, I met him at our rented place to put XI stickers all over our bedroom. Then we put the headboard and bed frame together and put bedsheets etc.. and arrange 2 of the oranges he took back on the bridal bed with the dried longans etc..
Then we went back to our respective homes where we distribute our cakes and invites.
IMPT:
Do remember that once you have your GDL and done up your bridal bed, only you and your hubby can enter that room, eg to put things in closets etc. Do not touch the bed. And NO ONE ELSE is supposed to enter the room. If your hubby has slept in that bed before (simply push the bed to one side instead of original position).
So So sorry if i'm long-winded but i didn't know how to summarise GDL events.
GDL or Guo Da Li i think means betrothal. Chinese way of saying engagement. Not sure though. But it's pretty interesting and it has nothing to do with any religion. It's a Chinese custom which free thinkers, Christians, Buddhists etc all follow.
The girl's side spends more for GDL in material stuff.. The guy's side spends more for GDL in terms of monetary stuff (Pin Jin and also on Number of Tables).
Prior to GDL day,
I already bought 2 tea sets, 2 pairs of Dragon Phoenix candles, 2 stand-alone mirrors which can see from hair to chin (& 2 red combs) amongst other stuff to be discussed below. Mirrors and combs are to be used for hair combing ceremony. I married out so i needed a mirror to be placed on the table which faces a door ... My hubby marries a wife into his household so he needed a mirror to place on a table which, when he sits down facing the mirror, his back faces the door. Our hair combing session was 11:05pm the nite b4 AD (must be after 11pm since Chinese calendar and time is ALWAYS 1 hr ahead of English clock!) whereas mine was only after his was completed (ie 11:30pm). Some people have the hair combing thing done on AD morning.
On GDL day:
Hubby (and matchmaker if any) brought to my parents place:
2 bottles hard liquor (no wine hor)
which we gave back 2 bottles of F&N rose syrup
18 oranges in a basket (must be even number)
which we returned 9 oranges
Stacks of cakes (looks more festive than cake vouchers; and cakes are cheaper too at less than $10/box)
which we returned some boxes for him to give out to his relatives
1 red packet for the Number of Tables
1 red packet for Pin Jin
We didn't want jewellery but some Mother-In-Laws do give DragonPhoenix bangles or SiDianJin to the bride.
We didn't have pig trotters (canned or fresh ones) since we just wanted basics.
Then my family (from my pocket lah) on GDL day, gave my hubby 2 sets toothbrush/paste in 1 mug, sewing kit, baby bath tub, tub for washing face, spittoon (haven't figured what to do with that yet), 2 packets of red dates/dried longans etc, and 1 tea set (for tea ceremony on his side). My parents dowry to us included bedlinen, electrical appliances which were given earlier and left at new bridal bedroom.
Most of the items are to symbolise that i'll be able to take care of my hubby, have children, take gd care of them too.. In olden days, without certain items, a groom going back to his home without such stuff, would result in friends & relatives thinking he's marrying a bride who's not 'capable'. These are only hearsay. But since my hubby and I just wanted to follow tradition and have a gd start, we just did the basics. I certainly didn't buy everything available!
I bought my GDL stuff from
Cheok Keuw Bridal Co
Blk 506 Jurong West St 52
#01-180 Spore 640506
Tel: 65660311
Clara Pay (usually in after 1pm)
If u tell her your dialect group and your hubby's dialect group, she'll advise you what to buy but she's very friendly, not pushy at all. So no obligations.
Impt: when the GDL gifts exchange takes place (we checked for auspicious date AND timing also.. but not nec), the bride-to-be is not supposed to see the fiance or even come out to see what's going on (eavesdrop can). If not, it seems to your hubby that you're a greedy bride
You can only come out of your room AFTER he leaves. So i never saw my hubby on GDL morning. In the afternoon, I met him at our rented place to put XI stickers all over our bedroom. Then we put the headboard and bed frame together and put bedsheets etc.. and arrange 2 of the oranges he took back on the bridal bed with the dried longans etc..
Then we went back to our respective homes where we distribute our cakes and invites.
IMPT:
Do remember that once you have your GDL and done up your bridal bed, only you and your hubby can enter that room, eg to put things in closets etc. Do not touch the bed. And NO ONE ELSE is supposed to enter the room. If your hubby has slept in that bed before (simply push the bed to one side instead of original position).
So So sorry if i'm long-winded but i didn't know how to summarise GDL events.
alicia_yong
New Member
deerixp> Yup, luckily got sum1 we can see as reference, but i tink mine will b quite different from my sis, so i tink i can onli follow up to GDL, but not AD.
Sharlene> Yup, tink most of the bride's parents r doing it tis way. Mine too! But it all depends on the bride's parents whether they 1 2 take all of the ang pow money or take part of it & gave the remainder to the couple to settle the balance of the table costs. According to my dad, he says he'll take all the ang pows for the 10 tables given to them by the groom, out of wich, he'll take abt $5k, den the rest will gif to the couple to settle the bills, etc.
I oso dunno whether the ang pows got $5k for him to take or not. Haha! Scarlly the ang pows from the 10 tables less than $5k.
M> Thanks for the info on GDL. Nvm if it's long-winded, at least we noe wat will b gg on. Thanks!
So the an chuang is done on the same day or b4 the GDL?
Sharlene> Yup, tink most of the bride's parents r doing it tis way. Mine too! But it all depends on the bride's parents whether they 1 2 take all of the ang pow money or take part of it & gave the remainder to the couple to settle the balance of the table costs. According to my dad, he says he'll take all the ang pows for the 10 tables given to them by the groom, out of wich, he'll take abt $5k, den the rest will gif to the couple to settle the bills, etc.
M> Thanks for the info on GDL. Nvm if it's long-winded, at least we noe wat will b gg on. Thanks!
foodietravel
New Member
Alicia>
An Chuang must be a chosen auspicious date.. and it is usually after the GDL.
So since that day for An Chuang is auspicious for us, we might as well do GDL in morning, then do the An Chuang in afternoon. Both 'tasks' don't take long anyway
Of course, you can first GDL on one day and then An Chuang another day..
An Chuang must be a chosen auspicious date.. and it is usually after the GDL.
So since that day for An Chuang is auspicious for us, we might as well do GDL in morning, then do the An Chuang in afternoon. Both 'tasks' don't take long anyway
Of course, you can first GDL on one day and then An Chuang another day..
alicia_yong
New Member
M> Ic... So for an chuang, again we need to prepare a lot of tings?
Hi everyone.. my parents hv oso agreed to pay extra tables on their own.. good to know they are willing to share the $$ burden hahaha
Re. nego for pin jin and tables and stuff for GDL, does it hv to be formally done between the parents on both side or the couple can casually ask and communicate between themselves... if need to be formal, do we have to be present and need to take place somewhere besides our parents' house?
Alicia > Long shifu advised us to do GDL and An Chuang on the same day as well cos more convenient to finish all procedures at one go... cant rem the whole list of things he gave us to prepare for An Chuang but most of them are fruits.. not sure if there are diff ways of performing An Chuang
This forum is making me very hyped to get married hahaha.. but we still got such a long way to go =(
Re. nego for pin jin and tables and stuff for GDL, does it hv to be formally done between the parents on both side or the couple can casually ask and communicate between themselves... if need to be formal, do we have to be present and need to take place somewhere besides our parents' house?
Alicia > Long shifu advised us to do GDL and An Chuang on the same day as well cos more convenient to finish all procedures at one go... cant rem the whole list of things he gave us to prepare for An Chuang but most of them are fruits.. not sure if there are diff ways of performing An Chuang
This forum is making me very hyped to get married hahaha.. but we still got such a long way to go =(
Alicia: haha..i haven talked to them in such details yet with regards to spilting of the Ang Paos..but most likely..my parents will still have to fork out $$ for extra tables coz my family too big..haha..sighz..
eh..i tot for GDL..will also have like a buffet reception at the girl's side?tats how i see wat some of my relatives do..haha..
eh..i tot for GDL..will also have like a buffet reception at the girl's side?tats how i see wat some of my relatives do..haha..
alicia_yong
New Member
cymk> I've spoken to 1 of my ex-colleague last time (before she left the company), she said tat for her case, asking for pin jin is the groom's parents went to the bride's hse & speak to the bride's parents. She said it's beta for the bride not to b ard wen they tok/neg on the pin jin & the bride mite feel very uncomfortable or pai seh abt it. But for my sis case, she discuss the pin jin amt wif her bf (as her bf now currently out of town for biz trip, will b out of town for another 2 yrs, only wen nearer to their AD & stuff den he'll fly back to attend). Not sure yet whether her bf's parents will b coming to our hse to discuss wif my parents abt the price. Will update on tis again if it happens to her.
Sharlene> Haha! My family is big too! Coz my mum got 2 parents, 1 is the real parents, the other is adopted parents, but both side of her parents r related. Her real mother gave her to the younger brother (adpoted parents) to bring my mum up, so we r actually closer to the adoptive side, but still wen it comes to inviting dem for the wedding, both sides oso we gotta invite. Tat's y i tink 10 tables actually not enuff (but tink my dad will try to keep it within the 10 tables bah).
Sharlene> Haha! My family is big too! Coz my mum got 2 parents, 1 is the real parents, the other is adopted parents, but both side of her parents r related. Her real mother gave her to the younger brother (adpoted parents) to bring my mum up, so we r actually closer to the adoptive side, but still wen it comes to inviting dem for the wedding, both sides oso we gotta invite. Tat's y i tink 10 tables actually not enuff (but tink my dad will try to keep it within the 10 tables bah).
his_fairlady
New Member
Hi gals,
i'm back =) for my GDL, me & future hubby have discuss regardin the pin jin amt to my parents n the rest of the items we will follow wat is needed =)
i'm back =) for my GDL, me & future hubby have discuss regardin the pin jin amt to my parents n the rest of the items we will follow wat is needed =)
alicia_yong
New Member
Vivi & DnA> Again. i tink i will see how much my sis bf giving, den discuss wif my bf on the amt, using my sis amt as a guide.
his_fairlady
New Member
hi alicia,
guess that will b a good idea for you =)
guess that will b a good idea for you =)
foodietravel
New Member
Alicia>
An Chuang not much to do. If your list of GDL items is correct, it will cover what you will use for An Chuang.
Things we needed/did:
Set up bed (if new) or move bed (if prev used by hubby)
Make the bed with the bedlinen etc
Put the 2 red lamps (preferably electrical, not battery operated) at the bedside. The lamps are to be switched on the night before AD and left on till you come back (eg from hotel wedding stay etc.. ) so if battery op, then your lamps may not be lighted anymore when you get back
Put the tray of 2 oranges, 2 fresh pomegranate (for luck), dried longan, red dates etc... and some put candy (make sure they don't attract ants!) and/or peanut candy on the bed (in the middle)
You can also put the mug with toothpaste/brush and whatever else near the bed
If you buy those metal 'coins', you may wanna put them in between mattress and bedframe but i can't remember what they're for
Oh, and put up all your XI stickers in the bedroom and on bedroom door
An Chuang not much to do. If your list of GDL items is correct, it will cover what you will use for An Chuang.
Things we needed/did:
Set up bed (if new) or move bed (if prev used by hubby)
Make the bed with the bedlinen etc
Put the 2 red lamps (preferably electrical, not battery operated) at the bedside. The lamps are to be switched on the night before AD and left on till you come back (eg from hotel wedding stay etc.. ) so if battery op, then your lamps may not be lighted anymore when you get back
Put the tray of 2 oranges, 2 fresh pomegranate (for luck), dried longan, red dates etc... and some put candy (make sure they don't attract ants!) and/or peanut candy on the bed (in the middle)
You can also put the mug with toothpaste/brush and whatever else near the bed
If you buy those metal 'coins', you may wanna put them in between mattress and bedframe but i can't remember what they're for
Oh, and put up all your XI stickers in the bedroom and on bedroom door
alicia_yong
New Member
M> Wah! Seems like so many tings to do! But den, for my sis case, her bf will b flying off a few days after their wedding, but she will haf to stay here for the time being till after i got married. A few days b4 i get married den my BIL will b flying back to attend den after my wedding, my sis will b flying off wif him for at least another 1yr+ or so. And now my sis bf's parents sold their hse & lived in wif their elder sis, so if my sis 1 2 an chuang, how is she gg to do it? Can she an chuang at our hse instead? Coz the elder sis hse tink not big enuff 2 accommodate so many ppl, wif elder sis, her hubby, 1 kid, the parents & younger
bro, so total 6 ppl excluding my sis & my FBIL. Wah!
bro, so total 6 ppl excluding my sis & my FBIL. Wah!
alicia_yong
New Member
Haha! Jus happened to see my FSIL in tis forum, but in another topic! Din expect her to b here... Keke!
xiaofeizhu83
New Member
Hi celine
I haven receive the invitation cards from Merchant Court as of yday... will keep a lookout for it today =) This is my first wedding show, hope it will be fun with lots of goodies keke...
I haven receive the invitation cards from Merchant Court as of yday... will keep a lookout for it today =) This is my first wedding show, hope it will be fun with lots of goodies keke...
his_fairlady
New Member
morning gals,
dint knw tt an chuang need so much procedure.. headache
dint knw tt an chuang need so much procedure.. headache
alicia_yong
New Member
Vivi> Haha! Me too, din xpect to haf to do & prepare so many tings. From GDL to An Chuang... Haiz... Dunno whether is there an easier way to do both tings. Haha!
his_fairlady
New Member
alicia,
dun worry.. coz ur sis getting married 1st.. so guess maybe u can see the stuffs that she prepare n when its ur turn, u might able to find a easy way out =)
dun worry.. coz ur sis getting married 1st.. so guess maybe u can see the stuffs that she prepare n when its ur turn, u might able to find a easy way out =)