skinnybeany
New Member
Jeraldin>> U r so lucky & your FFIL is very kind
(2007) Brides of year 2007
- Thread starter ladyice
- Start date
duno leh...go n tok wif my parents aso lets mi decide everything..even the hotel manager luff at mi...i wan my FH n i try 2 foot everything ourselves but they wun allow..even the bridal package we r taking,my MIL is paying n i somehow dun like it lor....now i'm so sian tt i gtg for gown trying oon thur...
curad>> they just trying to help u. ur financial burden is lesser...if you pai seh, then can repay back by taking them out for meals/shopping/talking to them.
you are really lucky in a sense lor...compared to some of us, ur emotional stress is way lesser.
Jeraldin>> wah...ur FFIL is so good leh. Unfortunately, my MIL and FIL are both poor. They no longer working liao, also not much savings coz my hubby's the youngest and the last to get married. I already pai seh, when my MIL and SIL saying wanna go goldheart and see jewellery not...
you are really lucky in a sense lor...compared to some of us, ur emotional stress is way lesser.
Jeraldin>> wah...ur FFIL is so good leh. Unfortunately, my MIL and FIL are both poor. They no longer working liao, also not much savings coz my hubby's the youngest and the last to get married. I already pai seh, when my MIL and SIL saying wanna go goldheart and see jewellery not...
blissfully_frustrated
New Member
Hi ladies!
curad, although your in-laws are paying for everything but does that mean that they will be physically there when you make your selection?
hey, marriage prep does not restrict to religion... Me buddhist and hubby taoist but went for one last year... Quite interesting even though some of the things mentioned are common sense but we tend to take it for granted and it's good to be reminded
curad, although your in-laws are paying for everything but does that mean that they will be physically there when you make your selection?
hey, marriage prep does not restrict to religion... Me buddhist and hubby taoist but went for one last year... Quite interesting even though some of the things mentioned are common sense but we tend to take it for granted and it's good to be reminded
bubblepearl
New Member
Jeraldin, envy u leh...well..both of us are not christian..but just realised recently we quarrel cos due to house, bridal issues, clothings..and even small, tiny matters leh...dunno why....we realised that our expectation and views are different...even during parking time..i will comment his parking as he sometimes park too toooo near to the next car..and i told him to shift the car..and he can tell me..he go buy icecream 1st..he will shift later...wat...how u drive when u eating ice-cream...somemore..our car is manual one..argh
blissfully_frustrated
New Member
Think i am also one of the few lucky ones... My PIL basically gave us a lumpsum to cover for our wedding and if spend wisely can prob cover partial renovation ... They are such nice pple! But as i was mentioning to jas last night, my stress comes from my hubby.. He has an issue of my parents taking the ang bao for the tables they ask for. He feels that it's unfair to his parents cos his parents does not require us to return back the ang bao so why my parents who are richer shld take the money... This is a topic that never fails to upset the both of us cos of the diff stand
skinnybeany
New Member
wp>> likewise, my HB also dun quite like it that my mom's taking 9 tables of angpao. But it's tradition, it's not something we want.
I told my HB if he not happy, go tell my mom straight at her face. And when my HB hears that, he'll shut up
I just tell him, the most pinjin give abit yi-shi yi-shi can oredi.
I told my HB if he not happy, go tell my mom straight at her face. And when my HB hears that, he'll shut up
I just tell him, the most pinjin give abit yi-shi yi-shi can oredi.
wendylim_1983
New Member
hi choon kiat,
Thanks.. i will check it out...
Thanks.. i will check it out...
blissfully_frustrated
New Member
Curad, what i mean is will your in-laws try to make any comment to influence your decision? I know of a friend who feels that her wedding is not hers cos her in-laws everything also involved
keke, thanks drea! If I need any of those, I'll give u a call 
bubble>> I think it's a process where lots of us went thru...It's a give-and-take thing lar. Mabbe both of u cool down and talk things thru calmly? Explain to each other ur perspectives?
.
Becoz as individual, we do things our own way lor...but when getting married, it involves another party (ur spouse). So end up, u have 2 individuals wanting to do things their own way. So a couple has to find the best-suited way to do things together
That's y ppl call u a couple mah. hee~~
bubble>> I think it's a process where lots of us went thru...It's a give-and-take thing lar. Mabbe both of u cool down and talk things thru calmly? Explain to each other ur perspectives?
.
Becoz as individual, we do things our own way lor...but when getting married, it involves another party (ur spouse). So end up, u have 2 individuals wanting to do things their own way. So a couple has to find the best-suited way to do things together
hi all...
Yest took 1/2 day urgent leave n rushed dwn to TTSH as I was told grandma-in-law's in critical condition...her breathing'sv.heavy n yet nt constant but she's still 'lingering'...she seems to be suffering...as there's no way she can get better we r hoping tat she can stop 'worrying' about all the family members so tat her soul can leave for a place where there wun be so much sufferings such as non-ending pricks n pokes fr the needles and plugs...
Yest took 1/2 day urgent leave n rushed dwn to TTSH as I was told grandma-in-law's in critical condition...her breathing'sv.heavy n yet nt constant but she's still 'lingering'...she seems to be suffering...as there's no way she can get better we r hoping tat she can stop 'worrying' about all the family members so tat her soul can leave for a place where there wun be so much sufferings such as non-ending pricks n pokes fr the needles and plugs...
blissfully_frustrated
New Member
Sigh... Curad... This is a taboo topic, sure quarrel one but he knows he does not has a choice in this... In fact i did raise the point abt newly wed shld have as much money as possible cos starting a new family, reno and household exp... She got the hint and said that she prob will not take the money.. So if she really not take it's a bonus and even if she takes, there's also nothing wrong.. Juz dunno how to let my hubby understand this
skinnybeany
New Member
bubblepearl>> like drea, my HB & I also attended the marriage prep course as I'm a Catholic.
It is a very useful & meaningful course. No doubt even after the course we still have arguments, like drea, my HB & I also talked things out and try to remind ourselves of what we've learned during the course.
drea>> actually me & Mic very funny, whenever we have argument, we'll bring EE in & jokingly said, "I want to go & burn the EE candle liao". haha.
It is a very useful & meaningful course. No doubt even after the course we still have arguments, like drea, my HB & I also talked things out and try to remind ourselves of what we've learned during the course.
drea>> actually me & Mic very funny, whenever we have argument, we'll bring EE in & jokingly said, "I want to go & burn the EE candle liao". haha.
Dear all,
i jz came back from my outdoor PS...(last wk was raining)...surprisingly the photographer brought a white bicycle and 2 teddy bears for us to take pic under a big tree....i was requested to pose on it with the white gown...it was really challeging..haha...wondering if the result turn out funny hee.....
CCK,
i personally will follow those 'feng shui' rules of arranging furniture.. had heard about "do not have any column above bedframe" and "do not face bedframe towards washroom"...if able to allocate furniture accordingly,why not!not because of superstitious, but as long as it is for a good reason,i am fine with these traditinal culture..
DoryMiki,
erm.... same thought with u... good food and a helpful hand from MIL to take care of babies...as i know,do not put 100% trust to a maid in future! anyway too bad,im not having in-laws....
gals,
will u be using normal guest book for attandance?im thinking of making a poster size stuff and to frame it after the function.. any opinion?
i jz came back from my outdoor PS...(last wk was raining)...surprisingly the photographer brought a white bicycle and 2 teddy bears for us to take pic under a big tree....i was requested to pose on it with the white gown...it was really challeging..haha...wondering if the result turn out funny hee.....
CCK,
i personally will follow those 'feng shui' rules of arranging furniture.. had heard about "do not have any column above bedframe" and "do not face bedframe towards washroom"...if able to allocate furniture accordingly,why not!not because of superstitious, but as long as it is for a good reason,i am fine with these traditinal culture..
DoryMiki,
erm.... same thought with u... good food and a helpful hand from MIL to take care of babies...as i know,do not put 100% trust to a maid in future! anyway too bad,im not having in-laws....
gals,
will u be using normal guest book for attandance?im thinking of making a poster size stuff and to frame it after the function.. any opinion?
pastillies
New Member
hi carol ,yup yup share ur reno quotes?? can see ur hse reno photos too??
hi Jess,
hee actually i only visited the outlet once @ jln Kilang...found it rather Ex....so walk out immediately didnt buy...since got Friven sale, so why not! hhaha
hi bride, ops! blur & silly me. i tot u designing & constructing ur hse...hee
hi goldfish, i totally understand...there's some places when we buy our furniture, they insisted we gave them a devliery date first, even if it's a tentative one...if we want to postpone later can always call do arrange, but if want to bring foward earlier, cannot...hence we gave them a tentative early date...if my reno doesnt complete on time...i also have to call up all the different companies to postpone the date..'diao!
p/s ur hse completion is S&P completion or reno completion??
hi Jess,
hee actually i only visited the outlet once @ jln Kilang...found it rather Ex....so walk out immediately didnt buy...since got Friven sale, so why not! hhaha
hi bride, ops! blur & silly me. i tot u designing & constructing ur hse...hee
hi goldfish, i totally understand...there's some places when we buy our furniture, they insisted we gave them a devliery date first, even if it's a tentative one...if we want to postpone later can always call do arrange, but if want to bring foward earlier, cannot...hence we gave them a tentative early date...if my reno doesnt complete on time...i also have to call up all the different companies to postpone the date..'diao!
p/s ur hse completion is S&P completion or reno completion??
skinnybeany
New Member
wp>> At least your mom got the hint....I also hinted my mom, but to no avail.
But then I guess if my sis also receives the same treatment (i.e my mom also take the angbaos for her tables), then I guess I will also be the same.
But then I guess if my sis also receives the same treatment (i.e my mom also take the angbaos for her tables), then I guess I will also be the same.
Janice, where is your PS location ? sounds fun eh.. can't imagine gotta pose on the bicycle in the heavy long gown ..
As for the guest book, I'll be using the one the hotel provides.
Initially, I tot of printing one of the photos and enlarge it to poster size and let the guest signed at the empty spaces. But come to think of it.. dunno where I can keep the poster after that, as such discarded the idea.
As for the guest book, I'll be using the one the hotel provides.
Initially, I tot of printing one of the photos and enlarge it to poster size and let the guest signed at the empty spaces. But come to think of it.. dunno where I can keep the poster after that, as such discarded the idea.
Hi Suelynn & Jaspire,
Thanks for the info. I finally i managed to find her contact on the website u given. So sorry to trouble u......
Issit that she has 2 nos.? Cos i sms her is at this no: 96569231.
I have sms Angel oredi, so sad she is fully booked on 9 June so i can't use her then she very good wanted to intro me her fren oso MUA but her fren's charges is quite ex $85. No choice lor I think i hv 2 use back my MUA assistant. slightly cheaper is $80.
Thanks for the info. I finally i managed to find her contact on the website u given. So sorry to trouble u......
I have sms Angel oredi, so sad she is fully booked on 9 June so i can't use her then she very good wanted to intro me her fren oso MUA but her fren's charges is quite ex $85. No choice lor I think i hv 2 use back my MUA assistant. slightly cheaper is $80.
actually the tradition of taking ang bao from tables that the groom side give to the bride side is pretty common though.. it like a gift and i think this gift is diff from the pinjin.. it like... the parents raised the daughter so big leh then now they are like "giving" her to another family leh.... in olden days its like they are "losing" a daughter... but now not like this leh but then the tradition still prevail..
so i think your in-laws should understand that.... if they have daughter then they will also ask for the same thing..
so it doesn't matter whether the bride's family is rich or not... must give the mom the money one... unless you all are paying the wedding banquet all by yourself then maybe can discuss with your mom to just take a few tables which you two can afford lor...
Coz according.. my parents and granny has the impression that the in-law should be the one who should foot the bill and not us.. and we are luckily that it is really that case for us... else i think we also very chiam... think if like that i will do without the banquet lor...
so i think your in-laws should understand that.... if they have daughter then they will also ask for the same thing..
so it doesn't matter whether the bride's family is rich or not... must give the mom the money one... unless you all are paying the wedding banquet all by yourself then maybe can discuss with your mom to just take a few tables which you two can afford lor...
Coz according.. my parents and granny has the impression that the in-law should be the one who should foot the bill and not us.. and we are luckily that it is really that case for us... else i think we also very chiam... think if like that i will do without the banquet lor...
skinnybeany
New Member
Jeraldin>> My HB's paying for everything on his own. I'm only chipping in for the church wedding part.
My mom even have the thinking that house reno, house bills, etc MUST BE borne by the HB one. I told her, pls lor...now is what "dynasty" liao. I must also chip in cuz else very taxing on my HB.
My mom even have the thinking that house reno, house bills, etc MUST BE borne by the HB one. I told her, pls lor...now is what "dynasty" liao. I must also chip in cuz else very taxing on my HB.
blissfully_frustrated
New Member
Curad, then your PIL really very nice pple
as what PL suggest, if you feel bad, then give them a treat or something in return.
junie, my mom is very open-minded but hor all it takes is some relatives and friends to start nagging saying this is not right... That's why i dun really bend on the idea she will definitely not take the ang bao
junie, my mom is very open-minded but hor all it takes is some relatives and friends to start nagging saying this is not right... That's why i dun really bend on the idea she will definitely not take the ang bao
bubblepearl >> humm...is the preparation stress getting into both of u? me n hb funnie..we never argued over the reno, furniture or even the marriage prep...we had differences over other issues thou.
Jeraldin >> the prep course is not only for christians. its for all couples who r getting married. btw u r so xin fu lei..your parents n in laws so understding..
curad tay >> another lucky bride. we pay for everything so we settle everything ourselves..
wp >> agree. we attended similar kind of course 3 yrs back..later on we tend to take certain things for granted sometimes. however we try to remind each other of what we learnt n learn to make things better. dats y hb so supportive of the prep course....
i understand how u feel..both of your views on this issue is different. he is not wrong n so are u..dun let it upset a great marriage ahead ok?
andrea & junie>> tks for the feedback on the prep courses!
I dun think i will do that..will let my children decide..
Jeraldin >> the prep course is not only for christians. its for all couples who r getting married. btw u r so xin fu lei..your parents n in laws so understding..
curad tay >> another lucky bride. we pay for everything so we settle everything ourselves..
wp >> agree. we attended similar kind of course 3 yrs back..later on we tend to take certain things for granted sometimes. however we try to remind each other of what we learnt n learn to make things better. dats y hb so supportive of the prep course....
i understand how u feel..both of your views on this issue is different. he is not wrong n so are u..dun let it upset a great marriage ahead ok?
andrea & junie>> tks for the feedback on the prep courses!
I dun think i will do that..will let my children decide..
omg, i really havent' been in here for a long time.. now looking at you all talk abt tables n angbows and all really quite stressed..
i didn't know that must give tables to mom at all (i wonder whether my mom knows.. ?). I just naturally assume all angbows will be returned to us as me n FH splitting the bill half n half. maybe i need to go ask...
Ladies.. i going for trial makeup soon. .any advice? what do they do during trial makeup anyway?
thanks lots for any advice!
i didn't know that must give tables to mom at all (i wonder whether my mom knows.. ?). I just naturally assume all angbows will be returned to us as me n FH splitting the bill half n half. maybe i need to go ask...
Ladies.. i going for trial makeup soon. .any advice? what do they do during trial makeup anyway?
thanks lots for any advice!
heh...when it comes to our kids' turn, I think we'll be under pressure from our parents and relatives.....
That's what my granny is doing unconsciously lor...she keeps say my hubby must be very rich coz he has been working for at least 3 years la, then normally so stingy lar, so his savings must be enormous -_-|||
wp>> we are in the same boat. Franz and I will argue over the ang pow issue. His reasoning is the same as ur hubby. So...it's also a taboo topic. We try to avoid it as much as possible....at least until to the pin jing discussion day (which has not been set).
That's what my granny is doing unconsciously lor...she keeps say my hubby must be very rich coz he has been working for at least 3 years la, then normally so stingy lar, so his savings must be enormous -_-|||
wp>> we are in the same boat. Franz and I will argue over the ang pow issue. His reasoning is the same as ur hubby. So...it's also a taboo topic. We try to avoid it as much as possible....at least until to the pin jing discussion day (which has not been set).
lovely_samsoon
New Member
thanks suika n kyra
yup, i've got a baptism cert from church, so that eliminates the trouble to have to find lawyer to do deed poll to change name.
a bit waste $$ here coz i will be turning 30 in two years n need to change IC. but i wld like to have my christian name reflected in my marriage cert that's why
jus chked ICA's web site. sigh... june is a bad time to change coz of sch holiday n there will be lots of pple there to get passports
yup, i've got a baptism cert from church, so that eliminates the trouble to have to find lawyer to do deed poll to change name.
a bit waste $$ here coz i will be turning 30 in two years n need to change IC. but i wld like to have my christian name reflected in my marriage cert that's why
jus chked ICA's web site. sigh... june is a bad time to change coz of sch holiday n there will be lots of pple there to get passports
lovely_samsoon
New Member
hi phis,
i think it shldn't be too difficult to find a bridal studio for the things u need with ur $3k budget. packages are mostly exp coz of the photo album. chk out the link for bridal. a few of us sept brides here are from SWC. u can try calling them. they're quite frenly n not pushy
wow! u spent $65k for renov. ur house must be really nice
i'm oso doing my renov now n need some ideas. can share ur pics?
i think it shldn't be too difficult to find a bridal studio for the things u need with ur $3k budget. packages are mostly exp coz of the photo album. chk out the link for bridal. a few of us sept brides here are from SWC. u can try calling them. they're quite frenly n not pushy
wow! u spent $65k for renov. ur house must be really nice
bubblepearl
New Member
well...thanks for all ur advise..but what i hated most abt him is...he swears in front of me when we quarrel..he knew i hated that most..yet he did that..he nvr did that before...now..i am getting a bit tired..:'(
Jer> u are not alone..my mum also expect the male side to pay for everything...*faint*
Jer> u are not alone..my mum also expect the male side to pay for everything...*faint*
blissfully_frustrated
New Member
haha... cannot imagine myself as parents now... gotta clear this hurdle first.. hee but if going by my hubby's theory and of he still keeps to it, he prob will readily give our son the money to help with the wedding (if we have the $$) and will not take any of the ang bao $$ from the daughter
bubble... go for the course lor, there's in fact 2 kind, one is the group kind and another is juz the couple themselves so u see which one u more interested in... no harm to juz check it out
PL... ur grandma's theory so interesting!! hee, but it does not work for us cos i started working earlier than my hubby, so going by ur grandma's theory, i'm richer
anyway my parents also believe that guys ought to pay for everything in the beginning, till i told them times are different now. and as mentioned b4, my open-minded mum understands it, so whew...
bubble... go for the course lor, there's in fact 2 kind, one is the group kind and another is juz the couple themselves so u see which one u more interested in... no harm to juz check it out
PL... ur grandma's theory so interesting!! hee, but it does not work for us cos i started working earlier than my hubby, so going by ur grandma's theory, i'm richer
anyway my parents also believe that guys ought to pay for everything in the beginning, till i told them times are different now. and as mentioned b4, my open-minded mum understands it, so whew...
Hi Ladies...
Diva, for the cake, u can try Pine Garden,their shops is in AMK Ave 10. and for the cans, u can try to buy at seng siong,no need to get from M'sia.
I think i am one of the luck one too. My FIL will be paying for our banquet,so all the angbao will need to give back to him. and my MIL always like to buy things for my new house,but sometime those things r not useful to me.. and i duno how to stop her from buying.. prefer she give me $$ and i buy myself..keke
And as for the table for bride's side, i am squessed in the middle cos, IL side asking me how many tables my parents wan and my parents keep saying "they give how many then we take how many and the rest we pay ourself" cos my parents need at least 10 tables.
Bubblepearl,u r not the only one.. Me and hubby also quarrel like duno wat during the reno period. but once we r heat up, we try not to talk anymore, cool down. after that sit down, talk slowly to solve the problems..
Diva, for the cake, u can try Pine Garden,their shops is in AMK Ave 10. and for the cans, u can try to buy at seng siong,no need to get from M'sia.
I think i am one of the luck one too. My FIL will be paying for our banquet,so all the angbao will need to give back to him. and my MIL always like to buy things for my new house,but sometime those things r not useful to me.. and i duno how to stop her from buying.. prefer she give me $$ and i buy myself..keke
And as for the table for bride's side, i am squessed in the middle cos, IL side asking me how many tables my parents wan and my parents keep saying "they give how many then we take how many and the rest we pay ourself" cos my parents need at least 10 tables.
Bubblepearl,u r not the only one.. Me and hubby also quarrel like duno wat during the reno period. but once we r heat up, we try not to talk anymore, cool down. after that sit down, talk slowly to solve the problems..
In my case, my family is better off financially then hubby. In fact my parents offered to help pay for the wedding, just so we could have it earlier. But hubby got his pride, he wants this wedding using our own money, so that it'll be more meaningful..also so that he won't feel paisei to my parents, cause now we're temporarily staying at my parents house.
So my parents indirectly contributed through me..I told my hubby that it's my money eventhough he suspects the real source. Haha.
I'm a Catholic too, but hubby isn't. So I'm not about where to take such marriage prep course.
So my parents indirectly contributed through me..I told my hubby that it's my money eventhough he suspects the real source. Haha.
I'm a Catholic too, but hubby isn't. So I'm not about where to take such marriage prep course.
french_vanilla
New Member
i m thinking of doing rebonding,so is not adviserable?
french_vanilla
New Member
my hair is really long n fizzy ..and i dun wish to just tie into a bun on my ad .so dun noe should i or not .
tt's y i feel very bad..they r paying 4 my mum's tables too,but they r not going 2 get a single cent frm my mum..hai,duno how they think aso lor...then my bridal package n everything,seriously,i wana pay 4 myself coz i feel tt this wedding is mine mah,i cannot let them pay 4 everything..
hi Agata,
i am a catholic like you, Drea and Junie. we attended EE (Engaged Encounter) so you might wanna check out the webbie below...
http://www.veritas.org.sg/ceespore/
EE is a wkend stay and you get lotsa time to focus on each other as a couple.
alternatively, you may wanna attend MPC, which is over a course 6 wkends. there are not stay-ins involved. for that you may wanna check out the link below...
http://www.catholic.org.sg/web_links/MPC/
don't worry about your hubby who is not a catholic, mine isn't too but we still enjoyed ourselves during the EE session. besides, we benefitted a lot from it, hence it's highly recommended! i am sure Junie and Drea will agree with me on that. hehe.
hope this helps!
i am a catholic like you, Drea and Junie. we attended EE (Engaged Encounter) so you might wanna check out the webbie below...
http://www.veritas.org.sg/ceespore/
EE is a wkend stay and you get lotsa time to focus on each other as a couple.
alternatively, you may wanna attend MPC, which is over a course 6 wkends. there are not stay-ins involved. for that you may wanna check out the link below...
http://www.catholic.org.sg/web_links/MPC/
don't worry about your hubby who is not a catholic, mine isn't too but we still enjoyed ourselves during the EE session. besides, we benefitted a lot from it, hence it's highly recommended! i am sure Junie and Drea will agree with me on that. hehe.
hope this helps!