(2002) Brides of year 2002
- Thread starter carol
- Start date
) have fun!!Hi all,
so many msg.
Me half day morning to go get key and view the house.
my FMIL also go and she get someone to pray and at the same time see Feng shui.
And she ask him a lot of questions and she tell must put this here, put that there. Use this room as what. Use that room as what.....
I got so angry but i still hold my temper.
Later after the sensei goes, my contractor and cousin(electrician) came. And she 'jiao dai' them must hack the kitchen first then toilet. must hack morning.....etc.....
Then when she goes to the room, she tells me, when u buy light for room, you must buy those which are square with wood at the side. Then I was thinking y so ma fan. Then i reply, we bought already. Circle one.
Not long later, she says, sometimes I'll come here and stay a few days. I almost collapse and reply 'auntie don't scare me' (i very straight forward one). she say wat don't scare u and she goes on with her stories. And she got a lot of those 'mi xin' things until i tell her, auntie cannot be too mi xin if not life very hard to go on....etc......
Luckily, the contractor and my cousin finish talking liao and we go and i rush back to office.
So xian rite.
I can't imagine if she comes to stay even for a day. Worst than my mum. So I tell my FH, if she come to stay, I 'hui niang jia'.
Irene
so many msg.
Me half day morning to go get key and view the house.
my FMIL also go and she get someone to pray and at the same time see Feng shui.
And she ask him a lot of questions and she tell must put this here, put that there. Use this room as what. Use that room as what.....
I got so angry but i still hold my temper.
Later after the sensei goes, my contractor and cousin(electrician) came. And she 'jiao dai' them must hack the kitchen first then toilet. must hack morning.....etc.....
Then when she goes to the room, she tells me, when u buy light for room, you must buy those which are square with wood at the side. Then I was thinking y so ma fan. Then i reply, we bought already. Circle one.
Not long later, she says, sometimes I'll come here and stay a few days. I almost collapse and reply 'auntie don't scare me' (i very straight forward one). she say wat don't scare u and she goes on with her stories. And she got a lot of those 'mi xin' things until i tell her, auntie cannot be too mi xin if not life very hard to go on....etc......
Luckily, the contractor and my cousin finish talking liao and we go and i rush back to office.
So xian rite.
I can't imagine if she comes to stay even for a day. Worst than my mum. So I tell my FH, if she come to stay, I 'hui niang jia'.
Irene
Irene, you collect yr keys today uh! muz be exciting rite..
I hear u tok abt your MIL.. and i can understand perfectly!!! cos my MIL oso not easy. I cannot imagine oso if she wan to stay at my plce. I will freak out.
But yet, when they so irritating, we muz ren rite? I oredi master my ren gongfu very well.. in front of her still can say ok, smile smile... but reach home i will left right kick and complain to hubby... hee hee!
I hear u tok abt your MIL.. and i can understand perfectly!!! cos my MIL oso not easy. I cannot imagine oso if she wan to stay at my plce. I will freak out.
But yet, when they so irritating, we muz ren rite? I oredi master my ren gongfu very well.. in front of her still can say ok, smile smile... but reach home i will left right kick and complain to hubby... hee hee!
Bluechin,
U so good, just go to yr room and cool down then can smile again. My FH is the only son so his only mother stay with us, if I am not happy with her untidiness, I will tell her off and give her the black face for the next few days. My MIL is kind of very dirty and very untidy type one, she can just put her clothes, cup everywhere in house.
U so good, just go to yr room and cool down then can smile again. My FH is the only son so his only mother stay with us, if I am not happy with her untidiness, I will tell her off and give her the black face for the next few days. My MIL is kind of very dirty and very untidy type one, she can just put her clothes, cup everywhere in house.
bluechin,
me having migraine now. Maybe if i strike 4D with lots of money tonite, i'll return all amount she lend us then she cannot rule over us.
Jas03,
Think I'm going to do that too. But today my time is pack as i can only take half day coz closing coming. Now is bcoz printer not working so can log in.
Then she morning there keep delaying time until I've to catch a cab back and had a rush lunch if not i think i'll be late and dead by the time i reach office.
Irene
me having migraine now. Maybe if i strike 4D with lots of money tonite, i'll return all amount she lend us then she cannot rule over us.
Jas03,
Think I'm going to do that too. But today my time is pack as i can only take half day coz closing coming. Now is bcoz printer not working so can log in.
Then she morning there keep delaying time until I've to catch a cab back and had a rush lunch if not i think i'll be late and dead by the time i reach office.
Irene
Jas03,
we same.... also complain to hubby then throw tantrums.....
cherly,
For myself, i dunno how to scold ppl...only perhaps my hubby
and furthermore my MIL is quite loud and can be fierce so all i can do is cry or cool down in the room then come out when i'm okay.....then pretend nothing happened cos she's after all an elder of mine.
My hubby's only child so my in laws r staying with us. My "Ren Gong" quite good but i think my hubby's even better cos he has to "Ren" his dad, mum and me.
It's also tough for him cos he is sandwiched between us so i always try to be very nice to his mum when she is not difficult.
we same.... also complain to hubby then throw tantrums.....
cherly,
For myself, i dunno how to scold ppl...only perhaps my hubby
My hubby's only child so my in laws r staying with us. My "Ren Gong" quite good but i think my hubby's even better cos he has to "Ren" his dad, mum and me.
L
loreal
Guest
Bleuz,
Thanks.. I would try to keep myself relax.. Okie..Me going off now.. Gonna rush for final fitting..
Blossom, Me coming back to work on next Monday..
But going honeymoon only on next Fri.. U 4got liao har..
Thanks.. I would try to keep myself relax.. Okie..Me going off now.. Gonna rush for final fitting..
Blossom, Me coming back to work on next Monday..
But going honeymoon only on next Fri.. U 4got liao har..
P
pk
Guest
bye bye all.. me going for my cruise.. but storming outside leh..
Hi vincent!! Thanx for ur help... I did read M & V books before... and I wrote a love letter and response letter to him leow... but dunno if he will have the patience to read through it though... but I felt better after writing down... it kinda helped me to relief the tension...
I'm feeling better now... thanx!!
I'm feeling better now... thanx!!
Hi jenjen,
Saw your posting on your quarrel with ur hubby. Cheer up. I believe many couples do quarrel on and off, and the stress of the wedding prep does add to the 'fire power' of these quarrels. Sometimes both party will juz have 'cool off' and think that it is the 'life together' that is impt and not the 'wedding' itself.
For me, my hubby refuse to let me pay for the wedding expenses, so wat I will do is that i will deposit into our joint account his contribution on his behalf. And tell him wat ever not enough please take from this account. In this way, it is more acceptable to him as he is not taking directly from u.
Hope that u will feel better soon.
cups
Saw your posting on your quarrel with ur hubby. Cheer up. I believe many couples do quarrel on and off, and the stress of the wedding prep does add to the 'fire power' of these quarrels. Sometimes both party will juz have 'cool off' and think that it is the 'life together' that is impt and not the 'wedding' itself.
For me, my hubby refuse to let me pay for the wedding expenses, so wat I will do is that i will deposit into our joint account his contribution on his behalf. And tell him wat ever not enough please take from this account. In this way, it is more acceptable to him as he is not taking directly from u.
Hope that u will feel better soon.
cups
Hi Gals,
Came back from NZ last nite... it was so so fun !! Blossom, we only covered the south island but it was tiring enough. We took the seat-in coach kind of tour and me and Hubby were so impressed with the efficiency and promptness of the tour services... ours were free and easy. Will talk more abt it later...
Still trying to get used to the 4 hrs difference btw Christchurch and Singapore.
Anyway, my wedding day went smoothly... I woke up at 5-ish... too excited I guess...everything was on schedule..... hubby came at 8 am and we were out of the place at 8.35 am. Managed to take some pics at my pool area. Reached my IL's place at 9 am. Left around 9.50 am. Reached my new home at 10.20 am and stayed for an hour or so.... had my outdoor pics done at 4 Seasons and had a lot taken at my new home. Monica is wonderful !!! She is fantastic !!! The videographer co-ordinated well with her. They had a great rapport!! Like you, so many of my relatives turned up in the morning to see me 'marry off'... so touched !!! It was so chaotic at my place. The tea ceremony went smoothly.. a little chaotic but alright... we had lunch catered by elsie's kitchen and the food was great ! We left for our shoot at Four Seasons at around 1.20 pm. The weather was kinda hot.. so I had 2 major touch-ups and Monica was indeed skillful in helping me with my touch-ups.
We were so flat out by the time it was afternoon.. my hubby had a headache but after some rest, we were ok.... all prepared for the evening event.
The wedding dinner went smoothly... it started around 8.20 pm. I had a chance to mingle with my guests and I think this is the best way to chit chat a bit before the dinner starts cos you simply have no time to chat to your frens and colleagues. I came down to mingle with the guests around 7.30 pm.
After the 2nd course... we went up to change to the EG..... they proceeded with the video presentation.. but the food serving was slow... so it delayed our 2nd entrance... we only made the 2nd entrance at around 9.40 pm !!! Some of my frens and colleagues commented that the service of some of the waiters were slow and a couple of them even told my frens to take the food themselves. Did make a little complain to my banquet mgr. Anyway, everyone loved the video presentation.... we loved it too.. it was something diff from the usual photo montage thingy...
He did a great job ! We had our toasting and speech.... the table to table photo taking were done within 15 mins.. even had time to be saboed by my colleagues. We even had 2 games played on stage... overall it was fun ! We even had time to toast with our guests and chit-chat. Then proceeded to change to my kwa.... again had like 15 mins to chat with my frens. So.. my dinner ended around 11.30 pm. Glad it was over and everthing went smoothly.
Monica was fantastic and patient as well.. I think she overshot her designated rolls... she took like 5 rolls of B & W and the rest were coloured. The videographer was fantastic.. he did a great job. He has a great rapport with Monica.
That was how my wedding day went.... so smoothly and I can look back with much relief that my day went without an hitch..
Oh... as for the ang bao... we managed to cover the $$$... but one word of warning... dun expect too much $$ from your colleagues... for me.. I made a loss from my colleagues but ang baos from relatives managed to cover most of it..
And having a small scale wedding was indeed great cos it was hassel free n personalised !!
Came back from NZ last nite... it was so so fun !! Blossom, we only covered the south island but it was tiring enough. We took the seat-in coach kind of tour and me and Hubby were so impressed with the efficiency and promptness of the tour services... ours were free and easy. Will talk more abt it later...
Anyway, my wedding day went smoothly... I woke up at 5-ish... too excited I guess...everything was on schedule..... hubby came at 8 am and we were out of the place at 8.35 am. Managed to take some pics at my pool area. Reached my IL's place at 9 am. Left around 9.50 am. Reached my new home at 10.20 am and stayed for an hour or so.... had my outdoor pics done at 4 Seasons and had a lot taken at my new home. Monica is wonderful !!! She is fantastic !!! The videographer co-ordinated well with her. They had a great rapport!! Like you, so many of my relatives turned up in the morning to see me 'marry off'... so touched !!! It was so chaotic at my place. The tea ceremony went smoothly.. a little chaotic but alright... we had lunch catered by elsie's kitchen and the food was great ! We left for our shoot at Four Seasons at around 1.20 pm. The weather was kinda hot.. so I had 2 major touch-ups and Monica was indeed skillful in helping me with my touch-ups.
We were so flat out by the time it was afternoon.. my hubby had a headache but after some rest, we were ok.... all prepared for the evening event.
The wedding dinner went smoothly... it started around 8.20 pm. I had a chance to mingle with my guests and I think this is the best way to chit chat a bit before the dinner starts cos you simply have no time to chat to your frens and colleagues. I came down to mingle with the guests around 7.30 pm.
After the 2nd course... we went up to change to the EG..... they proceeded with the video presentation.. but the food serving was slow... so it delayed our 2nd entrance... we only made the 2nd entrance at around 9.40 pm !!! Some of my frens and colleagues commented that the service of some of the waiters were slow and a couple of them even told my frens to take the food themselves. Did make a little complain to my banquet mgr. Anyway, everyone loved the video presentation.... we loved it too.. it was something diff from the usual photo montage thingy...
Monica was fantastic and patient as well.. I think she overshot her designated rolls... she took like 5 rolls of B & W and the rest were coloured. The videographer was fantastic.. he did a great job. He has a great rapport with Monica.
That was how my wedding day went.... so smoothly and I can look back with much relief that my day went without an hitch..
Oh... as for the ang bao... we managed to cover the $$$... but one word of warning... dun expect too much $$ from your colleagues... for me.. I made a loss from my colleagues but ang baos from relatives managed to cover most of it..
Hi,
Abt my NZ trip.. the weather was ok the first day we arrived... but after going to Dunedin.. it started to get cold. By the time we reached Te Anau, it was raining.... but the cruise around Milford Sound was fantastic ! It snowed and we saw now !! And the scenery was indeed breathtaking !! Wish I had a video cam with me though..
Anyway, Queenstown was fantastic ! We did this Dart River Safari around the Glenorchy area and it was indeed fun and exciting !! Glenorchy is 45 mins by drive from Queenstown. We did so much shopping in Queenstown and at Christchurch ! And for 9 days... we did not take any Chinese food.... wanted to enjoy the local food in NZ and it was worth it ! Anyway, from Queenstown, we proceeded to Fox Glacier... quiet town.. the following day... the weather was ok.. and we did this strenuous and tiring hike for 6 hrs up the moutains and fox glacier.. had a personal experience with the ice... it was so different ! MY legs were still aching till now..
The following day, we took the coach to Greymouth and caught the Tranz Alpine Train back to Christchurch... the scenery on the way was beautiful !!!
Well... wish I had the time t0 cover the North Island but the south island alone had so much to offer...
Highly recommended and we took this free n easy package... it was so much more relaxing the pace was good... except u gotta spend lots of time on the coach but on the way, they will let you stop and take pics...
Abt my NZ trip.. the weather was ok the first day we arrived... but after going to Dunedin.. it started to get cold. By the time we reached Te Anau, it was raining.... but the cruise around Milford Sound was fantastic ! It snowed and we saw now !! And the scenery was indeed breathtaking !! Wish I had a video cam with me though..
Well... wish I had the time t0 cover the North Island but the south island alone had so much to offer...
Angelia & Jowie,
U two really very "xing fu" leh!!! How i wish i have far far away in laws too!
My hubby is the oni son too, i did ask my in lawas to move in with us but luckily they say dun want lah, let us " guo er ren shi jie " heng ah!!
My in laws are okie, they always let me make decision on our new flat & wedding, they wont say much one lor.
Aprmin, perhaps u would like to go to Chinatown, they have those silky materials & its not very Xpensive too
U two really very "xing fu" leh!!! How i wish i have far far away in laws too!
My hubby is the oni son too, i did ask my in lawas to move in with us but luckily they say dun want lah, let us " guo er ren shi jie " heng ah!!
Aprmin, perhaps u would like to go to Chinatown, they have those silky materials & its not very Xpensive too
hi chemson,
thks for sharing. so glad that you had a wonderful wedding.
for my route, i flew to auckland from spore and took a domestic flight to christchurch. it was a rather quiet day becos it was 11 sept. we went to the cathedral and there was a service in remembrance of the innocent deaths on that unfateful day. i lighted a candle as a form of respect. it was really very sad.
thks for sharing. so glad that you had a wonderful wedding.
for my route, i flew to auckland from spore and took a domestic flight to christchurch. it was a rather quiet day becos it was 11 sept. we went to the cathedral and there was a service in remembrance of the innocent deaths on that unfateful day. i lighted a candle as a form of respect. it was really very sad.
the next day we set off for queenstown stopping at lake tekapo for lunch. along the way, we saw snow by the roadside. at first we din realise it was snow. when we got down to take photos, i was so excited to see snow all over. so fun! but i din witness falling snow. that's a pity.
lake tekapo was the first lake we went, along the way we also saw some other lakes. we couldn't resist and kept stopping to take photos. luckily we still manage to reach queenstown at around 5pm.
we went for the gondola at nite. the nite scene was fantastic. there were ppl bungy jumping nearby. so scary, i din dare to try it.
i think i mentioned earlier that we took a flight to miford sound instead of by coach. we wanted some time in north island so we din venture too far south in the south island. the weather that morning was just good for flying. i heard the flights were cancelled for the past week.
the scenary was magnificent! i felt like im on top of the world.... also a bit like the jurassic park scene... mountains all over me....
we went along queenstown for photo-taking. din but lotsa things though. we wanted to see as much as we could. it was really very cold. of all the places we went, queenstown should be the coldest.
lake tekapo was the first lake we went, along the way we also saw some other lakes. we couldn't resist and kept stopping to take photos. luckily we still manage to reach queenstown at around 5pm.
we went for the gondola at nite. the nite scene was fantastic. there were ppl bungy jumping nearby. so scary, i din dare to try it.
i think i mentioned earlier that we took a flight to miford sound instead of by coach. we wanted some time in north island so we din venture too far south in the south island. the weather that morning was just good for flying. i heard the flights were cancelled for the past week.
the scenary was magnificent! i felt like im on top of the world.... also a bit like the jurassic park scene... mountains all over me....
we went along queenstown for photo-taking. din but lotsa things though. we wanted to see as much as we could. it was really very cold. of all the places we went, queenstown should be the coldest.
The next morning, we drove north reaching wanaka before noon. The lake was so nice. So clear! There were little ducks wadding about. Wanted to try catching one to take photo but they were too fast for me... Very cruel also hor...
We reach fox glacier at around 4pm. I was really amazed by how the glacier was formed. I really cannot image... We headed for franz joself glacier after that. I think franz is much bigger that fox. For both glaciers, we din go for the guided trekking. We just walked around it and took some pics. Is the trekking so tiring? I was thinking it was a pity to miss it but we cant be too tired becos we would on the road again the next day.
We saw the local bird kea there. It is really cheeky, walking around the carpark as the little kids chased after it. It really went round the vehicles and seem to know exactly where to hide from the children, very funny!
We stayed at the town for the nite. We had a nite walk around the town, very quiet, very peaceful and very romantic.
We reach fox glacier at around 4pm. I was really amazed by how the glacier was formed. I really cannot image... We headed for franz joself glacier after that. I think franz is much bigger that fox. For both glaciers, we din go for the guided trekking. We just walked around it and took some pics. Is the trekking so tiring? I was thinking it was a pity to miss it but we cant be too tired becos we would on the road again the next day.
We saw the local bird kea there. It is really cheeky, walking around the carpark as the little kids chased after it. It really went round the vehicles and seem to know exactly where to hide from the children, very funny!
Hi Blossom and Chemson,
Like the two of you....I have also completed the process of wedding jitters, wedding day itself and honeymoon
..... back to work now
My wedding day went on very smoothly....no hiccups... at least I didn't even know of any
I had wonderful jiemeis to depend on. The service at Marina Mandarin was very good. We were really given step by step instruction..... to make it more digestible, they even gave the instructions in part, just before we had to carry them out
Overall, I had a beautiful wedding to reminisce on....
Had my honeymoon in Melbourne. It was free and easy, but we joined the land tours instead of driving on our own cos we just wanted to relax. Don't wanna do much planning
Enjoyed the tours very much. Really pigged out over there too!
For those of you who are still waiting to go through your wedding...... dun worry too much. Things will fall into place
Like the two of you....I have also completed the process of wedding jitters, wedding day itself and honeymoon
My wedding day went on very smoothly....no hiccups... at least I didn't even know of any
Had my honeymoon in Melbourne. It was free and easy, but we joined the land tours instead of driving on our own cos we just wanted to relax. Don't wanna do much planning
For those of you who are still waiting to go through your wedding...... dun worry too much. Things will fall into place
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">irene,</FONT>
cool down, cool down.. the elderly are always like that. my mum oso, but not so bad lah.. but she always listen to others, then 1 time say 1 thing.. like last nite, i juz
her lor..
<FONT COLOR="119911">
my cousin wedding 03 Nov, me 30 Nov. Initially she said parents oso cannot attend each other's wedding, then after my aunties say this say that, then she said <FONT COLOR="ff0000">".. ur ah yees say parents can go but dun give ang pow, but the couples cannot go.."</FONT> then i shoot her lor <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"my fren shifu says couple oso can go as long as not same mth.."</FONT>
in the end she said <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"up to u lor, u wanna go, go lor, it's ur own happiness.."</FONT>, then i said <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"okie lor, then u wanna go u oso go lor, later kena cheong then dun blame me lor"</FONT>. she kept quiet & walk out of my room!!
</FONT>
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">jen,</FONT>
sometimes it's better to write it down.. i used to do that (but not to my current hubby lah) cos argue with him, 90% i win mah..
dun worry, if u've come this far, i'm sure everything will work out fine.
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">jowie,</FONT>
hahaha.. ya lor, a lot of my frenz oso say i <FONT COLOR="ff0000">xing fu</FONT>, dun need to face in-laws. but hor, next time dunno lah. though hubby is not the eldest, his brother is all the way in London, but his 2 elder sisters in M'sia lah.. so next time when need to take care, oso must fetch them over here lor.. but my MIL quite easy to go along. think m'sians not so pantang leh. she everything oso say never mind one
but our relationship not as close lah, cos only seen a couple of times a yr.. each time only 1 - 2 days.
<FONT COLOR="119911">hubby will try to use up his money then use mine.
so i oso must control his accounts a bit lor.. not daily expenses lah, but wedding & house reno expenses..
</FONT>
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">pk,</FONT>
hope u enjoy ur cruise leh.. but dun eat too much ah, wedding only 2 mths away!!!
cool down, cool down.. the elderly are always like that. my mum oso, but not so bad lah.. but she always listen to others, then 1 time say 1 thing.. like last nite, i juz
<FONT COLOR="119911">
my cousin wedding 03 Nov, me 30 Nov. Initially she said parents oso cannot attend each other's wedding, then after my aunties say this say that, then she said <FONT COLOR="ff0000">".. ur ah yees say parents can go but dun give ang pow, but the couples cannot go.."</FONT> then i shoot her lor <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"my fren shifu says couple oso can go as long as not same mth.."</FONT>
in the end she said <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"up to u lor, u wanna go, go lor, it's ur own happiness.."</FONT>, then i said <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"okie lor, then u wanna go u oso go lor, later kena cheong then dun blame me lor"</FONT>. she kept quiet & walk out of my room!!
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">jen,</FONT>
sometimes it's better to write it down.. i used to do that (but not to my current hubby lah) cos argue with him, 90% i win mah..
dun worry, if u've come this far, i'm sure everything will work out fine.
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">jowie,</FONT>
hahaha.. ya lor, a lot of my frenz oso say i <FONT COLOR="ff0000">xing fu</FONT>, dun need to face in-laws. but hor, next time dunno lah. though hubby is not the eldest, his brother is all the way in London, but his 2 elder sisters in M'sia lah.. so next time when need to take care, oso must fetch them over here lor.. but my MIL quite easy to go along. think m'sians not so pantang leh. she everything oso say never mind one
<FONT COLOR="119911">hubby will try to use up his money then use mine.
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">pk,</FONT>
hope u enjoy ur cruise leh.. but dun eat too much ah, wedding only 2 mths away!!!
angelia...i see them once a year and each time about 6-8days, but my MIL quite kind, always bring me out to eat...altho my FH said she not pantang, but i guess elderly all the same lor, when we at the msia hotel, she tell the coordinator table cloth and bouquet use <FONT COLOR="ff0000">RED COLOR</FONT>, and i immediately black face hehee cannot tahan whole ballroom red tables! tink she sense it and shortly says let me decide hehehee i beri bad hor???
altho my FH whole family in sabah, i know his mom like SG a lot, but i already tell my FH our extra room in our new house muz reserve for my mom
yr mom listening to her sis is beri normal, she wan more advise coz prob she not sure of it...my mom say i can't attend my good frend ROM which is near my date, but i told her got people(actually is u hehe) told me ROM not counted
altho my FH whole family in sabah, i know his mom like SG a lot, but i already tell my FH our extra room in our new house muz reserve for my mom
yr mom listening to her sis is beri normal, she wan more advise coz prob she not sure of it...my mom say i can't attend my good frend ROM which is near my date, but i told her got people(actually is u hehe) told me ROM not counted
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">jowie,</FONT>
now i feel like "take risk" so that can attend my good fren's wedding (in Oct), then she can attend mine oso.. but scared later really "clashed" then i jia-lat cos me always the unlucky one!!
since she can listen to her sisters, then i can oso take the advice given by my fren's shifu rite?! hiaz... but i bery scared leh... hiaz... think better not play play!!
now i feel like "take risk" so that can attend my good fren's wedding (in Oct), then she can attend mine oso.. but scared later really "clashed" then i jia-lat cos me always the unlucky one!!
since she can listen to her sisters, then i can oso take the advice given by my fren's shifu rite?! hiaz... but i bery scared leh... hiaz... think better not play play!!
Jen,
hope all turn out OK for you and your hubby-t0-be.
Apple,
nice pics, u're pretty, he's (yr hubby) smart-looking.
BlueChin,
I envy your attitude towards MIL's and hubby's, men will be having a less complicated life if every wives think for hubby as being sandwiched (I sometimes feel I'm "haywired" being sandwiched). When I do feel "haywired", sometimes I escape out (go walk walk downstairs), sometimes I locked my mom out of master bed-room, sometimes I just don't know what to do (*smile*).
hope all turn out OK for you and your hubby-t0-be.
Apple,
nice pics, u're pretty, he's (yr hubby) smart-looking.
BlueChin,
I envy your attitude towards MIL's and hubby's, men will be having a less complicated life if every wives think for hubby as being sandwiched (I sometimes feel I'm "haywired" being sandwiched). When I do feel "haywired", sometimes I escape out (go walk walk downstairs), sometimes I locked my mom out of master bed-room, sometimes I just don't know what to do (*smile*).
crayon2512
New Member
Hi lollipop
I choose purple tulips, cally lilies for my hand bouquet. Had decide to use fresh flowers with candles for my restaurant decor..seen the setting before...nice.
Ladies,
Are u making any wrist corsage for your jiemei?
I choose purple tulips, cally lilies for my hand bouquet. Had decide to use fresh flowers with candles for my restaurant decor..seen the setting before...nice.
Ladies,
Are u making any wrist corsage for your jiemei?
Hi!
Thanks for your compliments!
I went to an old forsaken house in Grange road, a field near the old dental institute in Alexandra, and labrador park.
I think I'm very fortunate after reading the thread. Altho my MIL is also overbearing, I'm not staying with her. So not so bad. Can ren a bit till i get home. Also, as their's a Christian family, not so superstitious. When they start to follow 'customs' which are not really customs, just need to say that is a Christian wedding. They keep quiet immediately. Advantages of being Christians.
My parents are staying with me after my wedding. Thank goodness we 'he shui bu fan jing shui'. We don't bother each other and give each other space. Altho' also means few chances to be really close, but it's fine with me. Don't like pp controlling me, so even my dad knows not to step onto my toes.
Anyway, for the wedding, we coordinated most of the things ourselves, so our parents don't really have a chance to butt in.
Jowie & Angelia,
Both of U so xingfu! PIL far away, MIL nice to u. Sometimes, it's gd to get in their gd bks whenever possible. They treat u nicer and will defend u when u have any disputes.
My best friend is getting ROM just 1 week after my wedding, but she's also helping me as my ah yee. If we don't say, who knows! Both of us aren't patang.
Thanks for your compliments!
I think I'm very fortunate after reading the thread. Altho my MIL is also overbearing, I'm not staying with her. So not so bad. Can ren a bit till i get home. Also, as their's a Christian family, not so superstitious. When they start to follow 'customs' which are not really customs, just need to say that is a Christian wedding. They keep quiet immediately. Advantages of being Christians.
My parents are staying with me after my wedding. Thank goodness we 'he shui bu fan jing shui'. We don't bother each other and give each other space. Altho' also means few chances to be really close, but it's fine with me. Don't like pp controlling me, so even my dad knows not to step onto my toes.
Anyway, for the wedding, we coordinated most of the things ourselves, so our parents don't really have a chance to butt in.
Jowie & Angelia,
Both of U so xingfu! PIL far away, MIL nice to u. Sometimes, it's gd to get in their gd bks whenever possible. They treat u nicer and will defend u when u have any disputes.
My best friend is getting ROM just 1 week after my wedding, but she's also helping me as my ah yee. If we don't say, who knows! Both of us aren't patang.
Hi Crayon, are you the petite type? My florist told me calla lilly too big for me. bcos i'm quite small sized. i also wanted purple tulips but she say only have blue tulips,... :-( do u ty to match details on your gowns to the flowers? eg i have purple beads on teh gown, do i get bouquets with some purple flowers ?
also do u carry your bouquet for march in? i was told no need.
also do u carry your bouquet for march in? i was told no need.
angelia...yalor if anything *Touch Wood* happen to you or yr friend, either side parents will blame the other party...
actually PIL far far also got problem...last year my FH grandfather seriously ill, we have to take 3days unpaid leave immediately and fly there, just a 3day trip there costs us almost 1k...
actually PIL far far also got problem...last year my FH grandfather seriously ill, we have to take 3days unpaid leave immediately and fly there, just a 3day trip there costs us almost 1k...
Dear fellow Oct brides,
I have posted my pics on the web and set up a thread in the "a place to share ROM pic..." if you wanna see my pics....
also looking forward to seeing your pics too...really curious to know how each of us look like since we have known, supported and helped each other through these months of preparation for the most important day of our lives!
Counting down to the BIG day......
I have posted my pics on the web and set up a thread in the "a place to share ROM pic..." if you wanna see my pics....
also looking forward to seeing your pics too...really curious to know how each of us look like since we have known, supported and helped each other through these months of preparation for the most important day of our lives!
Counting down to the BIG day......
Angelia,
I'm trying to cool down but still i bombard his email telling him, if his mum wants someone who can like what she like and use what she like to use (e.g. kettle-electronic or fire?) then u go marry a maid better and cheaper.
And I hope his mum can understand that we want to have 'er ren shi jie' too if not, no child lor.
Etc etc tec....
Just hope that after wedding, she won't really come every week to bother me.
I not the very untidy type one but when it's nearer to my exam, i will just dump the books anywhere and put in piles. but his mother is the goddamn clean one. Her house is too clean until i scared.
When she say the cupboard she bought for him in the past is very big and i tell her that the cupboard is not really big. My house one bigger and even that I still got not enough space for all clothing. And she say, those old one just throw lah, and i tell her back cannot, some can wear one and also girls need more cloths. I actually feel like telling her, if girls got not so many clothes than i not girl liao.
Really fed up yesterday just talking to her.
imagine if she come stay with us in future. What will happen to my hello Kitty, Winnie the Pooh, Disney cartoons character and other soft toys and also my one and only one best companion since born till now a doggy (doll)?
Thus I forbid her to stay. If she come to stay, i think i'll lock the study room (thinking of keeping all my stuff there) and paste a lot of paper around the house saying "PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH"
Even my mum also don't anyhow touch my things ever since i last throw my tantrums years ago.....
So how can she control me?
Might as well get a maid to control.
And also, I very close to my sister. When she say next time saturday i come here and sleep, I tell her, sometimes my sister also want to come and sleep, so u must tell me first lor. Then she shouted "Ur sister got house, ask her go home and sleep". If she is not elder, I think I'll tell her back like i tell my mother," you also have a house and marble floor better than this house, then y u want come here and stay".
I think next time if she come and stay I'll just paste and lock whatever than right in front of her, take my bag and tell my husband. I 'hui niang jia' not coming home to sleep.
Irene
I'm trying to cool down but still i bombard his email telling him, if his mum wants someone who can like what she like and use what she like to use (e.g. kettle-electronic or fire?) then u go marry a maid better and cheaper.
And I hope his mum can understand that we want to have 'er ren shi jie' too if not, no child lor.
Etc etc tec....
Just hope that after wedding, she won't really come every week to bother me.
I not the very untidy type one but when it's nearer to my exam, i will just dump the books anywhere and put in piles. but his mother is the goddamn clean one. Her house is too clean until i scared.
When she say the cupboard she bought for him in the past is very big and i tell her that the cupboard is not really big. My house one bigger and even that I still got not enough space for all clothing. And she say, those old one just throw lah, and i tell her back cannot, some can wear one and also girls need more cloths. I actually feel like telling her, if girls got not so many clothes than i not girl liao.
Really fed up yesterday just talking to her.
imagine if she come stay with us in future. What will happen to my hello Kitty, Winnie the Pooh, Disney cartoons character and other soft toys and also my one and only one best companion since born till now a doggy (doll)?
Thus I forbid her to stay. If she come to stay, i think i'll lock the study room (thinking of keeping all my stuff there) and paste a lot of paper around the house saying "PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH"
Even my mum also don't anyhow touch my things ever since i last throw my tantrums years ago.....
So how can she control me?
Might as well get a maid to control.
And also, I very close to my sister. When she say next time saturday i come here and sleep, I tell her, sometimes my sister also want to come and sleep, so u must tell me first lor. Then she shouted "Ur sister got house, ask her go home and sleep". If she is not elder, I think I'll tell her back like i tell my mother," you also have a house and marble floor better than this house, then y u want come here and stay".
I think next time if she come and stay I'll just paste and lock whatever than right in front of her, take my bag and tell my husband. I 'hui niang jia' not coming home to sleep.
Irene
<FONT COLOR="aa00aa">irene,</FONT>
whoa, u've got quite a fiery temper leh.. c u so "ruo bu jing feng".. i better not step on ur toes, too.. <FONT COLOR="ff6000">gals,</FONT> remember to remind me whenever we hv outing, not to offend our fren here hor...
i think most of us encountering more & more problems/conflicts/arguements as we getting close to our wedding. guess all of us really need to find ways to cool ourselves & not get into (unnecessary) big fights lor.. not worth it when we think of it later when we cool off..
<FONT COLOR="119911">me not good at consoling people, so will leave the jobs to the rest, ya? me can only help by lending my "eyes" & "ears"
</FONT>
whoa, u've got quite a fiery temper leh.. c u so "ruo bu jing feng".. i better not step on ur toes, too.. <FONT COLOR="ff6000">gals,</FONT> remember to remind me whenever we hv outing, not to offend our fren here hor...
i think most of us encountering more & more problems/conflicts/arguements as we getting close to our wedding. guess all of us really need to find ways to cool ourselves & not get into (unnecessary) big fights lor.. not worth it when we think of it later when we cool off..
<FONT COLOR="119911">me not good at consoling people, so will leave the jobs to the rest, ya? me can only help by lending my "eyes" & "ears"
wah, irene cool it man... me msn u now...
vincent... u are the one being sandwiched so you understand... but for my case, my whole life I try to get what I want... as long as I can afford it and it's within my budget, I'll get it... but for my ILs side, I know jolly well they can afford after all the monthly allowances their dear son has been giving them for so long... I calculated and it's a few tens of thousands!!! Where did the money go?? but they still complain and complain to the son that this one so ex, that one so ex... then want to buy bangles and jewellery for me which cost less than $2k and COMPLAIN until the son say he will pay for them!! I din even ask for those ok!! then the son kanna pressured... then he anyhow tell them things until it make me and my folks look bad... cos like my family unreasonable... then he come and talk to me and complain abt my parents... then he dun like my parents... then I go and talk to my parents hoping they can reduce some things... then my parents angry... then I KANNA!!
Let me tell you, vincent... if I'm a groom... watever the bride's family wants... I'll try to give... unless I cannot afford... then I'll let them know I cannot afford outright (i.e. in $'000) and talk nicely to ask them to try to reduce a little... I will not argue and complain behind their backs abt things which cost a few hundreds... make them happy and u make ur wife a happy bride... dun stress the bride abt such petty things!!!
vincent... u are the one being sandwiched so you understand... but for my case, my whole life I try to get what I want... as long as I can afford it and it's within my budget, I'll get it... but for my ILs side, I know jolly well they can afford after all the monthly allowances their dear son has been giving them for so long... I calculated and it's a few tens of thousands!!! Where did the money go?? but they still complain and complain to the son that this one so ex, that one so ex... then want to buy bangles and jewellery for me which cost less than $2k and COMPLAIN until the son say he will pay for them!! I din even ask for those ok!! then the son kanna pressured... then he anyhow tell them things until it make me and my folks look bad... cos like my family unreasonable... then he come and talk to me and complain abt my parents... then he dun like my parents... then I go and talk to my parents hoping they can reduce some things... then my parents angry... then I KANNA!!
Let me tell you, vincent... if I'm a groom... watever the bride's family wants... I'll try to give... unless I cannot afford... then I'll let them know I cannot afford outright (i.e. in $'000) and talk nicely to ask them to try to reduce a little... I will not argue and complain behind their backs abt things which cost a few hundreds... make them happy and u make ur wife a happy bride... dun stress the bride abt such petty things!!!
Jen,
I can understand what you told me. I'm just glad my in-laws are nice ppl. They said nothing they want. I asked my wife to ask again, make sure I didn't leave out anything that they may want, but they just want nothing. Gladly, my MIL's brother gave us a $'000, that helps us a little. two sisters each gave $'000, and that is another big help.
Yes, we shd never speak ill remark about parents-in-law, hus shd not talk bad about wife behind her back and vice versa. I think you're logical and right about this. Make him (yr hus) understand, but let him cool down first. Talk nicely, men have their soft spot in their heart but need help from wife to bring it out. Since both of u have committed to wedding ceremony, make things for the better, don't think of return when u give (e.g. I bought u a t-shirt every month, but why I didn't receive any gift from u since I know u? or My mom is kind, I expect yr mom shd be as kind). U are used to yr mom, having stayed with her since u were born. Similarly, he is used to his mom only, difficult for him to accepted what yr mom is. I can easily find fault with my MIL, but I will tolerate my own mom even I know she is wrong. So, be cool-headed, think of good ways to get back together.
Another suggestion: U may want to take up pre-marriage course. These courses are conducted by various organisations. I'm taking my last lesson (ON SEXual r/ship) this weekend (total 5 lessons).
One of the thing the course taught is Never Expect Return From Your Better Half When You GIVE, this is called LOVE. Communication which includes listen (not hear) is one of the key aspect of a successful marriage. Listen - I hear his feeling, not the words. Hear - I hear the words, so I quickly responded with an answer that he may not need (that is, he may need just ears to listen, someone to vent his anger or sorrow etc).
U can find out about this courses at www.rom.gov.sg (companies are listed in this webpage). I don't really gain much, especially my wife initiated to attend this couse and I refused to go initially, but I do enjoy the new friends I know in this course.
Additional thing that may help: call him once or twice a day from office when he is not-so busy, and tell him 'I luv you' (or something like that). This will definitely bring out his soft spot, provided nothing else is said after (e.g. I luve u. ....yr mom is a bit too much yesterday....) soft spot becomes rock.
ummary: Deal with pple's feeling, not the tasks (e.g. I do this to make him happy, I will be happy if he is happy, I never expect him to give me anything even I have gave him something). I experienced that when my wife deal with the tasks, she neglected my feeling. But she is OK the day after, e.g. cook for me, bla bla bla.
To forgive and forget bad things is the root to my way of life.
PS: Above suggestions may or may not help. Kids do not try, as I'm trianed to deal with men (that is "myself"). heehee.
I can understand what you told me. I'm just glad my in-laws are nice ppl. They said nothing they want. I asked my wife to ask again, make sure I didn't leave out anything that they may want, but they just want nothing. Gladly, my MIL's brother gave us a $'000, that helps us a little. two sisters each gave $'000, and that is another big help.
Yes, we shd never speak ill remark about parents-in-law, hus shd not talk bad about wife behind her back and vice versa. I think you're logical and right about this. Make him (yr hus) understand, but let him cool down first. Talk nicely, men have their soft spot in their heart but need help from wife to bring it out. Since both of u have committed to wedding ceremony, make things for the better, don't think of return when u give (e.g. I bought u a t-shirt every month, but why I didn't receive any gift from u since I know u? or My mom is kind, I expect yr mom shd be as kind). U are used to yr mom, having stayed with her since u were born. Similarly, he is used to his mom only, difficult for him to accepted what yr mom is. I can easily find fault with my MIL, but I will tolerate my own mom even I know she is wrong. So, be cool-headed, think of good ways to get back together.
Another suggestion: U may want to take up pre-marriage course. These courses are conducted by various organisations. I'm taking my last lesson (ON SEXual r/ship) this weekend (total 5 lessons).
One of the thing the course taught is Never Expect Return From Your Better Half When You GIVE, this is called LOVE. Communication which includes listen (not hear) is one of the key aspect of a successful marriage. Listen - I hear his feeling, not the words. Hear - I hear the words, so I quickly responded with an answer that he may not need (that is, he may need just ears to listen, someone to vent his anger or sorrow etc).
U can find out about this courses at www.rom.gov.sg (companies are listed in this webpage). I don't really gain much, especially my wife initiated to attend this couse and I refused to go initially, but I do enjoy the new friends I know in this course.
Additional thing that may help: call him once or twice a day from office when he is not-so busy, and tell him 'I luv you' (or something like that). This will definitely bring out his soft spot, provided nothing else is said after (e.g. I luve u. ....yr mom is a bit too much yesterday....) soft spot becomes rock.
ummary: Deal with pple's feeling, not the tasks (e.g. I do this to make him happy, I will be happy if he is happy, I never expect him to give me anything even I have gave him something). I experienced that when my wife deal with the tasks, she neglected my feeling. But she is OK the day after, e.g. cook for me, bla bla bla.
To forgive and forget bad things is the root to my way of life.
PS: Above suggestions may or may not help. Kids do not try, as I'm trianed to deal with men (that is "myself"). heehee.
hi chemson,
i also visited greymouth after i left franz joself but we din take the train though we heard that it will be a wonderful ride. we went further north to see pancake rocks and blow-holes. the drive along the tasman sea was very enjoyable too... of cos we had to stop to take photos.
then we headed for hanmer springs to stay for the nite. it was very rush that nite as we spent too much time at pancake rocks. we were actually discussing how the rocks were formed.
we reached kaikoura for whale-watching the next day, something which my hubby really looked forward to becos he missed that when he went there few years ago.... but the trip was cancelled becos the scouters din see any whales at all. imagine how disappointed my hubby was...
but we knew that it was not the season for whale-watching.
i also visited greymouth after i left franz joself but we din take the train though we heard that it will be a wonderful ride. we went further north to see pancake rocks and blow-holes. the drive along the tasman sea was very enjoyable too... of cos we had to stop to take photos.
then we headed for hanmer springs to stay for the nite. it was very rush that nite as we spent too much time at pancake rocks. we were actually discussing how the rocks were formed.
we reached kaikoura for whale-watching the next day, something which my hubby really looked forward to becos he missed that when he went there few years ago.... but the trip was cancelled becos the scouters din see any whales at all. imagine how disappointed my hubby was...
Apple,
juz saw yr pics..... u look pretty and the pics were really well-taken.
Thanks for sharing.
vincent,
i know wat u mean by the sandwich part cos i also try to think about how my hubby will feel if i frequently get upset with his mum etc.
That's why i always try to "Ren" and usually by the next day i've forgotten about the matter or bad experience.
Well, sometimes we juz got to give and take otherwise it will be tougher to live together in future.
You took up Pre-Marriage course izzit.... Good rite! Feels it does help us.
Irene & JenJen,
i'm also not too good at comforting ppl. Perhaps u wanna take some time to talk with your other half about how u feel when things has subsided.
Take Care and dun think so much okay.
<FONT COLOR="ff0000">*HuGs*</FONT>
juz saw yr pics..... u look pretty and the pics were really well-taken.
Thanks for sharing.
vincent,
i know wat u mean by the sandwich part cos i also try to think about how my hubby will feel if i frequently get upset with his mum etc.
That's why i always try to "Ren" and usually by the next day i've forgotten about the matter or bad experience.
Well, sometimes we juz got to give and take otherwise it will be tougher to live together in future.
You took up Pre-Marriage course izzit.... Good rite! Feels it does help us.
Irene & JenJen,
i'm also not too good at comforting ppl. Perhaps u wanna take some time to talk with your other half about how u feel when things has subsided.
Take Care and dun think so much okay.
<FONT COLOR="ff0000">*HuGs*</FONT>
but kaikoura is a really nice place. we even woke up early the next morning to catch the sunrise... something which we have never been determined enough to do...
we then went picton to take a ferry to north island. the scenary during the cruise was very nice too.
wellington is a very busy city. we arrived when everyone was rushing home after work. the crowd was shocking. we went for nite walk that nite. it wasn't very cold but the wind was very very strong. no wonder it has a nickname called windy wellington.
we went north to lake taupo. the largest lake in nz. heard it is the size of spore from the locals. it was formed during a major volcanic eruption long ago when nz was not occupied by human yet.
we then went picton to take a ferry to north island. the scenary during the cruise was very nice too.
we went north to lake taupo. the largest lake in nz. heard it is the size of spore from the locals. it was formed during a major volcanic eruption long ago when nz was not occupied by human yet.
Irene...cool down 1st! u sound beri furious, cooooool down!
did u talk to yr hubby this big issue wif his mom? i tink yr hubby shld try to work something out between u and his mom...now u and MIL are both strong headed person, so both party better dun clash, yr hubby need to come out and mediate...
but if yr hubby tends to side slightly to yr mom side, never ask him tis, my FH tell me dat any smart lady will not ask tis question <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"if yr mom and me fell into sea who u rescue 1st"</FONT>...i tink it's fair not to ask coz i know my FH will definitely choose his mom, juz as i would choose my mom...we can always find a partner, altho it takes time, but there's onli 1 mom in the whole world lor
and i am sure dat after yr FH tok nicely to his mom, his mom won't want to make things difficult for her own son
did u talk to yr hubby this big issue wif his mom? i tink yr hubby shld try to work something out between u and his mom...now u and MIL are both strong headed person, so both party better dun clash, yr hubby need to come out and mediate...
but if yr hubby tends to side slightly to yr mom side, never ask him tis, my FH tell me dat any smart lady will not ask tis question <FONT COLOR="ff0000">"if yr mom and me fell into sea who u rescue 1st"</FONT>...i tink it's fair not to ask coz i know my FH will definitely choose his mom, juz as i would choose my mom...we can always find a partner, altho it takes time, but there's onli 1 mom in the whole world lor
and i am sure dat after yr FH tok nicely to his mom, his mom won't want to make things difficult for her own son
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