Underground Scandal

[dimpxtt]

Maybe a lots of pple has been doing that, just that we dont know n it is not glamorous to say out.

One of my single galfriend had that.She call it scandal.

She says since shes single and scandal does not hinder her career. Do and bye.no feelings but enjoyable (but of course the scandal must be of standard eg cute/skillful/give her surprises etc)
Shes enjoying her life.she says.

At e same time she still date other guys (i dont know whether she got do or not)
She says will only stop till she got a bf.

I know humans got urge,esp when single.No partner to care for,esp physically.We are all adults.But deep inside, are we really happy if underground fling/ons?
Still back to square 1 rite.
But i see my galfrend 'radiant' and enjoying her life....feel tempted..hahahaha
Is it stupid to wait for a partner to love, and miss out this type of 'youth'
haaaaaa.

 

[denise80]

Seems like women are getting more liberal. Gone are the days when only our male counterparts flirt around and have flings...come to think of it, it takes two hands to clap...when the males had flings outside, chances for the gals being the victims are very low...

dimpxtt, not sure about you but you are certainly entitled to the type of life you want to live and enjoy. I'll be more worried about HIV/AIDS if I were you.

 

[miloice]

Regardless how liberal... one thing is clear. Women still like to compare. Don't you know what you need and want to be happy? Are you so insecure and need to compare?

 

[unhappymummy]

Men having flings (be it married or attached) are easily forgiven and soon forgotten

Women having flings are labelled as cheap...

So tell me, how liberal is this world.. haix...

 

[miloice]

Easily??? by who??? by the up tight???

The labelling is done by the up-tight in the very 1st place. And its regardless of gender.

 

[infojunkie]

no harm trying...

it's only consider scandalous if the sexual escapades r being exposed and u find uself being judged immoral by society... that is provided u r someone famous. if u're a nobody, the most ppl ard u gossip behind ur back. not bad what, u can pretend u r cecilia cheung and enjoy ur 15 mins of fame

 

[jefferson_edison]

really done understand what kindda scandal you people are talking about...

 

[thommy]

panda must be feeling lonely...junkie pls do your job!!!

 

[leibit]

To each his own. Flings are fine.....but not when it gets more physical for me....Somehow, I don't like the physical proximity.

 

[infojunkie]

no, panda's not lonely.

she's busy thinking - she's a Thinker

a thinking panda?

if only Rodin's still alive, and we'd hv another great masterpiece...

-_-

 

[cococherry]

Panda must be lonely lately after quitting her job, ditching her bf.

 

[verluv]

Cute one! Junkie!

 

[powder]

we've been watching BV90210, Melrose Place, Friends n lotsa bull so often and tat's ok... for that matter even F4/BOF and all that was of similar concepts just tat sex wasn't depicted.

we should start recruiting nuns, seems the women locally have the mindset to either be one of the 2 extremes.

 

[thommy]

junkie, wahahahahhaha...

 

[dimpxtt]

aiyoh,

i just ask only ah
coz i see real cases of my galfrends doing that ah..
just ask mah..
wat got to do wif me lonely and ditch bf..
bo liao ah

btw..junkie..cute panda..
i love e pics..
where e hell did u get so many cute panda pics..

hahhah

 

[babystorm]

Are you talking about sleeping around? Dating is ok lah.. But that's abit extreme. Should learn to love our bodies more and not give to any Tom, Dick and Harry. Not to mention the possibility of getting some weird disease. You sow what you reap.

 

[dimpxtt]

ya
love our body
if so easy to give to guy..
guy will labelled you as easy
wun treasure u
haiz

 

[babystorm]

Unless the person is a whore by profession.

 

[sgbabydoll]

A prostitute sleeps for money. She doesn't sleep around for fun. Let's get this clear.

Love your body doesn't mean you don't sleep with a man at all. If you want to do it, be selective and cautious. Always insist on the use of condom. Exchange health reports to ensure no STIs. Etc.

 

[stanzza]

dimpxtt,

too easy = girls whom sleep with many ppl IMO. So guys like to ask girl's bf history (how many she had). Take that number X 2 and that's about right. Anything > 10 is many for me.

Also, for me I tend to lose interest in girls if I dun make progress within 2 weeks. If girls play too hard to get, they may lose out too.

 

[stanzza]

Also, anyway a lot of girls would just say they sleep w their bf only (not sleep around).

But their bf can be like for 1 or 2 days only lor. And multiple bf at same time. So I don't see what the diff.

No right/wrong. In fact I appreciate these ladies and think they deserve to live and enjoy their life. They know what they want and live their life to fullest. But for guy, when it comes to selecting a wife then we would try to exclude the fun loving girls liao. Similar to how girls tend to avoid marrying a flirt.

 

[sgbabydoll]

Aiyor, you sound cynical, Stanzza.

FYI, women don't have to sleep with all the bfs they have had.

 

[stanzza]

Doll,

i'm a man. I can smell the type of girl I'm looking at. Info about history, some talking and impression would get me the "rough" estimate and size her up to some good degree of accuracy.

No choice, can't be asking her directly how many man she slept with early in the game rgt?

 

[powder]

does it really matter how many guys a girl has slept with?

 

[sgbabydoll]

Can you smell if they have got STI? This is more useful info than the number of men they have slept with.

 

[stanzza]

STD lol~ thats a good one. No unfortunately.
If scared can wear armour or avoid the high risk ones. If not then just be brave and reckless.

 

[simpleman]

"A prostitute sleeps for money. She doesn't sleep around for fun. Let's get this clear."

today, the line is pretty blur. There are many girls that I know of - they sleep around in exchange for money or favours.

They are in for fun - to meet many different men and at the same time to make some money.

When I got to know some of these women, I am shocked as well. All of them have slept with their bfs.. and in many cases, their bfs are also sleeping around. It made them think, why can't I have fun too and at the same time, earn some money?

 

[simpleman]

stanzza,

How you smell and tell? By sleeping with them? Don't try to think you are smart by "smelling". Can you even smell death?

High-risk ones? Which are the high-risk ones? They got put on their fore-head?

 

[stanzza]

SM

no such thing as 100% in life. Even crossing a road also no guarantee safe. You can look left/right but still that is no guarantee. Even stay at home or office also can kenna fire or 911 incident.

Sometimes, ppl just feel like taking that little risk and be reckless. Is all part of life. Recklessness and danger also bring along some excitement. Is thrill.

 

[sgbabydoll]

Stanzza, you have a choice who you want to sleep with. So if you contract STI or HIV, it is not classified as accident.

 

[stanzza]

Come to think of it. V sian. Now everything is about stability.
Maybe I'll go for an adventure trip like camping in the wild of something. Or river rafting. Missed the thrill.

 

[sgbabydoll]

SM, good that you have pointed that out. I have completely forgotten that there exists a group of girls who do that.

 

[stanzza]

SM

have you seen man doing the same?

 

[simpleman]

I am not asking for 100%. I just want to know the type of girls that you are assigning to high-risk group?

Man doing the same? As in sell for sex?

 

[stanzza]

man also doing sex for favors

 

[simpleman]

Of course men are also doing.

There are a couple of places in SG where girls can pick up guys - and pay them for services.

 

[miloice]

stanzza, by that logic, you should enjoy playing with your life by loading a revolver with a few bullets and pulling the trigger just to enjoy the stupid trill.

We all take calculated risk within our boundaries. Not random stupid risk.

 

[dimpxtt]

u want to play...consequences is urs....
fault no1

 

[sgbabydoll]

"But i see my galfrend 'radiant' and enjoying her life....feel tempted..hahahaha. Is it stupid to wait for a partner to love, and miss out this type of 'youth'"

Well, Panda, can you do sex without love? Will you be able to abandon yourself to physical gratification only?

Trying to answer your original question.

 

[dimpxtt]

nope..cannot do sex w/o love....at least must have some feelings..
but hor..if skill no good...soon will lose e feelings........eeeeeeeeeeeeee....

 

[sgbabydoll]

You don't have to be a carbon copy of your gf. For example, if you can't bring yourself to do ONS, can consider FWB or a short-term relationship.

No one can guarantee that if you wait your knight will make his appearance. On the other hand, your soul may feel empty if you go for physical pleasure only. Your choice.

 

[dimpxtt]

doll
wat is fwb?

ya loh..soul is still empty if go for physical..

 

[confused09]

At the risk of seeming uptight and unexposed, I think ONS or high risk (rough sex like anal, bondage, S&M etc) sex has too many health related dangers.

This comes from seeing what happened to a number of close girlfriends, who 'lived up to their youth' from late teens into their mid 20s. Even a close friend into MSM (men who have sex with men) wound up in the hospital for 1 month due to viral infection. Health takes a hard beating.

Don't know about males but the female body is not built for multiple sexual partners. If I exchange intercourse with 1 different guy per month, that makes 12 guys a year. Add that to the number of years I remain single, say 3 X 12 = 36 and the math goes on.

STDs, pelvic inflammatory diseases, cervical cancer, syphilis or the more extreme end of the stick, HIV. Sure 'scandal' may seem like a romantic and liberated idea, but sometimes I cannot help but wonder if fictional character Samantha Jones is real, how many trips does she actually make to her gynecologist per month for the number of infections she is getting?

ONS and FBs are not cool and at most, can gratify the modern feminine voice or qualify as a passing phase. But as a permanent choice in lifestyle straight into my twilight years, hehe I'd rather pass. Not a very smart idea if I assess the health risks involved.

Just my 2 cents worth.

 

[simpleman]

Common mis-conceptions - that those with multiple partners are at higher risks. Yes, on the number risks of having infection is much higher. But mostly, especially sex workers - they take precautions, they have monthly check-ups..

They are at least cleaner than those ONS. ONS are much more dangerous because people tend to let our hair down. The looks may be deceptive.. and we ended up not taking any precaution at all.

Don't confuse ONS with FBs. For FBs, you can be exclusive.. and still you can take precautions. It is not much different from a lover except that there is no feelings.

Anal sex is particular dangerous because naturally the anal is not meant for sex.. there are far too many viruses in the back and they are more prone to rupture and infections.

 

[sgbabydoll]

SM, why do some guys prefer anal sex with their female partner? They are not gay.

Panda, FWB = Friends with benefits, aka FB.

 

[simpleman]

doll,

I don't know.. maybe they like to try something different.. it is tighter I suppose..

 

[stanzza]

it have a bit of SM element.
it's tighter.
why missed out? You can do something there.
Plus, some heard abt it, so wanna try it to see how it feel.

My thoughts.

 

[stanzza]

I dunno. On one hand I agree w u guys on safety and health, on the other hand if I am so worried, don't do la.

If anyone ask me for health report for example, I would have just walk out. What a turnoff.

 

[simpleman]

why missed out? You can do something there.


People try must also try.. scared missed out? So typical kiasu singaporeans.

I have tried it before - long time ago - before marriage - not because of other people try must try.. Just curious. But no. I don't like it. That is why, once is enough.

As for health report. It will be a turn-off if gf or lover.

But for FB, it is completely understandable. Health report is good for both.

 

[sgbabydoll]

SM, many FBs are non-exclusive. One of my gfs in FB has a few regular FBs depending on who's free and her mood. Naturally, these men also have a few FBs each including my gf.

I have asked her how to ensure safety, and she said health report exchange. But we typically do health screening once a year, the window is too big. I felt this is not safe enough and told her to insist on the use of condom. She is quite daring, she goes bare for sex as she is on BCP!

Then another of my gf has started doing FB, and I told her to please use condom, and perhaps can order blood test on STIs and HIV say every half a year.