Rubber or Pills or ???

[janetow]

Hi Everyone,

Like to seek some advice.

Getting married on Next Wed. Both my husband and me are V (we believe in doing it after marriage). It will b our 1st time to do it(if we still have the energy to do it )

Anyway main issue, we are not planning to have kids so fast so we been discussing whether to use rubber or pills.

I heard from frens that it would not be enjoyable for guys to use rubber which i would really hope our 1st time will be 1 which both of us will enjoy or at least he will enjoy since i also heard from frens that 1st time for gal is nvr enjoyable.

As for pills, also heard from frens that some gals may feel giddy/nostous after consuming and may even have side effects like affecting conceive changes in future.

Althou hubby did said he is fine will rubber but can see that he kind of looks disappointed.

Anyone can advise or any other suggestions other than the common rubber and pills?

 

[shiilng]

hi, congrats on your wedding!!!

you can try using this contraception Intra-Uterine Device (IUD). After giving birth to my baby boy last year, i dont wish to have another one currently.

like you said, men do not like to put on condom while pills will make women prone to cancer. thus my gynae ask me to try this IUD.

i have been on it for 9 months. everything is ok. =)

hope it helps.

 

[mark78]

Lubber lah. guys should not be selfish and use lubber.. but i have to agreed that the feeling of doing wo lubber is heaven.

Do i sound evil? or color?

 

[janetow]

Hi Shiling,

Thanks you ^^

May i ask what is this IUD and how is it being used? I sounded like some advance gadget hehe

 

[shiilng]

haha. 中国人 you sound naughty lah not evil loh. lol.

Janet, it is a small device that is inserted into the womb to prevent pregnancy.

It is believed that the IUD prevents the fertilised egg from attaching to the wall of the womb (i.e. prevents implantation). In addition, Levonorgestrel IUD reduces heavy bleeding during menses compared to the other types of IUD. The Levonorgestrel IUD prevents excessive thickening of the womb lining and therefore lightens the
period.



you can try to read more from here : www.hpb.gov.sg/edumaterials/download.aspx?id=1794

haha. ya. very advance gadget loh. i dont even know such thing exist man. lol.

 

[janetow]

Hi Shiling,

Thanks i will read on it. But hor ... planting something into the womb sounds scary ; ;

 

[shiilng]

haha. ok lah. initially i feel scary too loh.
i scare of pain leh. then my gyane very funny man, he told me dont scare lah. later i insert and you will feel nothing de. lol.

within a few seconds, he insert liao then tell me that i can go. i was like huh? so fast. lol.

i thought of eating pills or contraception implant those but then hor got alot of side effects leh. i scare i lost my figure. lol. cos take those will increase our weight. =(

 

[bforestz]

by the way, is it expensive? i am already married but not planning to have a kid yet.....been on rubber but think it is too expensive for a long term thing..haa

 

[shiilng]

i am not sure how much it cost here because i give birth in malaysia as i am not local in singapore.

you can choose whether you want to imput the IUD for 3 years or 5 years. i choose the 5 years one and it cost me RM180 while the 3 years cost RM150.

 

[ginasjm]

Hi Janet, personally I am not a huge fan of pills but i do take morning after pill if it's on higher risk days. Had used rythem method for a long while and it works for me. But it requires understanding of how your body works and does takes some time. It's very individual based.

If your mensus cycle is accurate, you can consider rhythm method, more info http://health.ninemsn.com.au/family/womenshealth/690901/natural-contraception

Another website where you can check for your ovulation period and thus avoid sex during that period. http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/ovulation-calculator.html

Hope above helps, cheers

 

[janetow]

Hi Shiling,

Having a guy gynea dun sounds appealling to me ler. Hehe .. i shy ^^. Anyway i will check wif my gynea on tat i guess and my gynea is a she

Hi Avocado,

This method may not be applicable to me as I m underweight as such my mense are irregular. Sometimes 2-3 mths then come once.

 

[yuene]

AvocadoAddict: it may not be advisable to use the morning after pill on a long-term basis as there are side effects (I have taken it myself a couple of times). I wouldn't recommend it to anyone except in the case of emergencies.

Janet, you might want to speak to your gynae or GP a little bit more on the matter; after all, not every woman will experience the same side effects. I was on the Evra patch for 2+ years and I had minimal side effects. However, since you are getting married next Wednesday, it might not be as effective if you start a course of contraceptive pills now--it may not take effect in time. You might still have to use a condom anyway. But if you're looking for something long-term, then do speak to your gynae on your options.

 

[siobhanlee]

heh..not trying to cause any alarm of sorts but I conceived even though my ex was using a condom. But it is still a good form of contraceptives.

I prefer to be on the pills though but I do understand that some ladies suffer from side effects while they are on it. Fortunately, I didn't. My skin condition actually improved when i was on it because it was also used to control acne. One advantage of being on the pill too is that it helps to regulate your menses. My menses used to come every 3-4 months too (and I still managed to conceive ).

 

[ginasjm]

Hi Janet

Yup, it's better not to in your case.

Hi Sylphide

Thanks for your advice.

I've used twice/thrice and yes I totally agree with you, it's only for emergency use. Cheers

 

[hoddioo]

Use a rubber. Buy those thinner types (jap brands)

 

[janetow]

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for the advice and info ^^.

A fren suggested withdrawal method ... pull out before him cum. Dun sounds workable rite? precum can cause pregency too if i m not wrong.

 

[siobhanlee]

Withdrawal method is not an ineffective method of birth control (has a high rate of failure) although i'm sure it is one of the most popular method used (esp by the teens)

 

[lovingyou]

Janet: it depends if your HB has a lot of pre-cums. If he doesn't, withdrawal method is rather safe, I have been doing that since my ROM 4 yrs back...

 

[siobhanlee]

Err littlewoman, withdrawal method should not be suggested as a birth control method even though you've been lucky so far.

This is especially so in Janet's case because her husband is not experienced at all and may not have the self-control to withdraw in time.

 

[janetow]

Hi Little/Sio

Thanks noted of the comments... hard to decide really ^^.

Someone even told me dun bother since i have irregular period so wun so easy kanna de.. haha

 

[lovingyou]

Siobhan: agree... However, I guess a guy regardless if he is a V or otherwise shld roughly noes how his body works?

 

[lovingyou]

Janet: it is true that u might not get pregnant that easily due to ur irregular periods but it could be in the con side whereby you can't monitor which are the days that are slightly more dangerous?

 

[siobhanlee]

Janet
Well, it is afterall your choice whether or not to take precaution. I had the same view as your friend & thought that my chances of getting pregnant is low because as i've mentioned, I used to have menses only 3-4 times a year (it had been like that since my teens). But I still manage to conceive (even with the use of a condom).

 

[lovingyou]

Siobhan: guess it is all pre-destined?

 

[miloice]

There are other reasons, i.e. rough sex, quality issue, expired products (did you check the date?)

 

[siobhanlee]

littlewoman..yeah. we weren't prepared to start a family then but since it was meant to be, we decided to go ahead with the pregnancy and i never regretted it

Milo,we were careful and usually do check but oh well. (maybe my mil poked holes in the condom ) I remember mentioning it to my gynae then and he did say that condoms is 97% effective and that I wasnt the first patient he knew who conceived even when protection was used.

 

[thommy]

siob, then u must be the 3% group...must go buy 4d/toto...huat ahhhhhhhhh...hahahahhaa

 

[lovingyou]

Haha...

 

[siobhanlee]

well, the odds of winning the 10 mil toto this friday is about say 1 in 8 million (or prob even more) so....

 

[clipperjunk]

o come on, it's the first time, just go with the risk lar, enjoy for what it's truly meant to be...after that then get him to use latex....

 

[mark78]

"Janet: it depends if your HB has a lot of pre-cums. If he doesn't, withdrawal method is rather safe, I have been doing that since my ROM 4 yrs back... "

thanks for the laffter..

littlewoman..yeah. we weren't prepared to start a family then but since it was meant to be, we decided to go ahead with the pregnancy and i never regretted it

"Milo,we were careful and usually do check but oh well. (maybe my mil poked holes in the condom ) I remember mentioning it to my gynae then and he did say that condoms is 97% effective and that I wasnt the first patient he knew who conceived even when protection was used."


Not all lubber give u 97% protection woh. the durex with spemicide achieve that rate. but abt the 3mm.. i don think its safe and i wont recommend ppl using it.. just my 2 cents

 

[thommy]

siob: u may very well be the next lucky winner

 

[janetow]

Sure will need to decide on 1 type.. we are not ready for babies yet.

Risk = Fear

 

[lovingyou]

Janet: Fear = stress and it will make 1st time rather hard and unenjoyable... why not just use condom and enjoy the process?

 

[flyingstar]

use a condom. coz since it's first time for both of you, it is risky because he may not know how he will react.

it is more important to enjoy the process and feel the intimacy...

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

IUD is more suitable for those who have gave birth before and thus lesser pain. (recalled hearing from my gynea and read abt IUD and its benefits online before)

Janet since u r a V, i would advise u dun go on IUD.. Like other suggested it is better for u to take pills or use condoms for protected sex.

 

[sgbabydoll]

Seriously doubt a virgin man knows when and how to withdraw properly.

 

[lovingyou]

Looks like a condom is one of the best soln for the time being?

 

[sgbabydoll]

It is the ONLY solution for TS for the time being since other contraceptives will take a longer time to start to take effect

 

[simpleman]

Condom is the easiest solution for sure..

Of course, in the long term can consider IUD (some girls find it not comfortable) or pills (some gals react badly to it).

But nothing is 100% fool-proof..

 

[janetow]

Hi Everyone,

Thanks for all the comments and advice.

Spoken to hubby abt it. We decided for the 1st time to go without any prevent. Since no symptoms of my menses coming.

After that we prolly will go for pills. Seeing my gynea this afternoon to check and ask pills ^^

 

[shiilng]

hi janet,

all the best in your first night!!!

hope it will be a nice experience for you.

=)

 

[simpleman]

janet,

I have to say you need to be responsible. Yes, 1st time and one time only.... no prevention..

But you know if you are not ready for baby, accident can happen.. you don't want that.

And 1st time no protection, there will always be a question of 2nd and 3rd time..

Think about it.

 

[green_tranquility]

I have 3 friends who "stuck 4D" on their wedding nights. They got pregnant, as they didn't bother to use any protection for the first time. So u better don't play play and take the risk.

 

[paperboat]

Hi Janet,

I'm on Evra patch for almost 1 year. So far, it is the most effective contraceptive method I have tried. Withdrawal method is far too risky. If you use condom, sex will be less enjoyable if you are very particular about it. And pills gave me the most side effects!

So I've switched to patch and it has worked very well for me so far. I just got married too, not planning any children yet. So better to prevent unplanned pregnancy. The patch doesn't give me much side effects except little nauseous feeling when I first used it. After a few days, my body kinda adjusted to it, so it is very good.

You only need to change the patch once a week for 3 times a month. I feel that it regulates my menses very well and also I have experienced lesser menses cramp after using it.

Most women clinics sells it now. The brand is EVRA. And it costs about $40 per month (including consultation fee)

More info can be found here. http://www.leeds.ac.uk/lsmp/healthadvice/Contraceptivepatch/contraceptivepatch.htm

Hope it helps!

 

[thommy]

lol...scaly really tio beh pio on her 1st night...HUAT AH!

 

[lovingyou]

Nothing is impossible... Janet, you realli have to think twice if you are realli not ready for any babies.

 

[janetow]

Yup, we have valued the risks involved.

We had decide to leave it to the hands of God. Althouh, we are not ready for kids now but if thats god arrangement we will accept it too since i m not young too 30 this year. And my mum is encourage us to have kids too if not i will become gao lin chang fu. She also said she will help us take care of our kids ^^

Anyway, juz back from gynea... she gave me pills

 

[flyingstar]

oh that's good.

take it as a gift from God if you really have a child, but of course be mentally prepared since you both decided to go natural.

 

[xiao_nu_ren]

Janet,

Why don't you go for the none hormone IUD that will last for 3 yrs? It's usually fitted in by the Gynae. And it regulates the menses after fitting it in.

It'll be good for you if you still decide to go ahead for family planning after that. Since your menses is regulated after using the IUD. I am on the IUD for 2 and half yrs already. It's expiring soon. No accidents at all.

If you want to know more, you can go look for a gynae. He'll explain more in details.