Relationship and sex

SixPackMan

New Member
Pardon me as this is my first post and I am caught in a scenario that is changing my perception in life....

I have been actively dating online since 20, meeting people in app for sports hoping to find someone with similar hobbies since I am working in an all male environment. I recently also joined dating apps CMB, OK, tinder, paktor etc. I am nearing 42 soon, still single, just broke off from my 5th relationship. Shortest 2years, longest 6 years.
As I age, I come to realise it is difficult for me to change my character and generally getting quite sick of going into long term dating which involve staying together. I have no attraction to foreigner Chinese as a Singaporean Chinese. I have dated many locals but only went into relationship with 5 all these years. Most local woman don't get to the relationship phase because they know I don't have time to bring them to travel (90% of the women in social apps have travelling as a hobby) and I expect them to know how to cook/ laundry for themselves which scare them off at very start.
I am generally very tolerant with woman, to the extent I cook and do laundry during cohabilitation with them. I am ok with splitting housework, I am just not OK when someone takes for granted and totally refuse to do after some time lapse.
There's a limit on how much I can do but it becomes a habit for woman to complain they are tired from work to the extent they start leaving smelly clothes and undergarment in my bedroom and bathroom. Since it's their smell, they don't find any odour and telling me I am over sensitive (my folks already can smell, what do you think) Merely doing laundry for them before my surrounding start to reek of odour. I am an executive at work, my time is quite limited, the reason why I cook is because I have allergies and can't always dine out with them wherever they want, my health is deterorating and getting obese as well from outside food. Puffy eyes, congested throat, belly bloat etc.
It's always when I am single like now, my health is great and my body is in good shape. To put it short, I feel unfulfilled in daily life in a relationship and bedroom. I think my expectation of woman to automatically cook and do laundry is also ruining my relationships. When I am single, my mum does my laundry and cooking. Hiring a maid is out of the question, my folks don't welcome an outsider. I paid for this house at age of 30, I can't possibly chase my folks out because I can't afford a second house for them.

My most recent ex, whom we patched once, initiated a different relationship.
I met her online, whom I spent a generous amount and cured her of liver cancer from her excessive drinking habits. We have been together for 2 years, cohabilitate for 1.5years and knowing she lead her entire life as a bar hostess, she has generally changed a lot except she still doesn't do her own laundry/cook and always demand me for a timetable as to how much time to spend with her. She also got an office job after I persuaded her to. For myself, I don't lead a fulfilled sex life because my appetite is high and because of my religion upbringing doesn't cheat or visit escort.
My exs (except the recent) all complains that my appetite is too much. It's not that I want to do it everyday, it's when she initiates and I need 3-5x per session to even be fulfilled. When I am single, I don't even jerk off and friends have been counselling me to DIY to cure this appetite of mine even when I am not single. They even offered to bring me to club and hookup, which I have no interests because of fear for STDs.

Few days back, she told me she wants to get back with me. Close to a FWB until both of us finds a partner and we would go our separate ways. I am terribly sure she isn't trying to find another person because she is too attracted to me in terms of looks, gratitude and in bed. She is the kind that will just visit my area, allocate few hours each week hoping to catch a glimpse of me even months after breakup up til now a year. I am avoiding her because I want a clean break and want her to get on with her life, the only form of communication is email because I blocked all her contacts.

Since we don't stay together anymore, we are not going to argue over housework, not controlling how I plan my schedule, she's the only person that has the closest match to appetite as me in terms of sex. Should I go along with it? I keep having this feel I am ruining her life and I have already gave up on dating knowing how erratic my work schedule can be after promotion.
 
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SixPackMan

New Member
No, I don't need a maid at this moment, still doing my own cooking and laundry. Except that we don't live together anymore, it's better for both of us.
Since she already admitted being with me too much, she took me for granted when asked why the sharing of chores and responsibility lessened as days go by. She just wants to enjoy life and house chore isn't part of it.
I'll hire one later point of my life when I am not capable of doing my own stuff.
 

sane

Member
You don’t sound like an easy person to get along with, not an ideal bf.
The only way is get an docile foreign lady as an full time housewife to fullfill all your requirements.
Otherwise i don’t seem why someone who’s capable of their own keep want to choose you.
You have no time, with weird household rules, probably got to wash every piece of the clothings immediately to avoid smell, gotta cook for you and eat every meal at home, no privacy and got to cramp with your family and satisfy you 3-5 hours on bed.
Sound like a terrible deal.
 
Pardon me as this is my first post and I am caught in a scenario that is changing my perception in life....



I have been actively dating online since 20, meeting people in app for sports hoping to find someone with similar hobbies since I am working in an all male environment. I recently also joined dating apps CMB, OK, tinder, paktor etc. I am nearing 42 soon, still single, just broke off from my 5th relationship. Shortest 2years, longest 6 years.

As I age, I come to realise it is difficult for me to change my character and generally getting quite sick of going into long term dating which involve staying together. I have no attraction to foreigner Chinese as a Singaporean Chinese. I have dated many locals but only went into relationship with 5 all these years. Most local woman don't get to the relationship phase because they know I don't have time to bring them to travel (90% of the women in social apps have travelling as a hobby) and I expect them to know how to cook/ laundry for themselves which scare them off at very start.

I am generally very tolerant with woman, to the extent I cook and do laundry during cohabilitation with them. I am ok with splitting housework, I am just not OK when someone takes for granted and totally refuse to do after some time lapse.

There's a limit on how much I can do but it becomes a habit for woman to complain they are tired from work to the extent they start leaving smelly clothes and undergarment in my bedroom and bathroom. Since it's their smell, they don't find any odour and telling me I am over sensitive (my folks already can smell, what do you think) Merely doing laundry for them before my surrounding start to reek of odour. I am an executive at work, my time is quite limited, the reason why I cook is because I have allergies and can't always dine out with them wherever they want, my health is deterorating and getting obese as well from outside food. Puffy eyes, congested throat, belly bloat etc.

It's always when I am single like now, my health is great and my body is in good shape. To put it short, I feel unfulfilled in daily life in a relationship and bedroom. I think my expectation of woman to automatically cook and do laundry is also ruining my relationships. When I am single, my mum does my laundry and cooking. Hiring a maid is out of the question, my folks don't welcome an outsider. I paid for this house at age of 30, I can't possibly chase my folks out because I can't afford a second house for them.



My most recent ex, whom we patched once, initiated a different relationship.

I met her online, whom I spent a generous amount and cured her of liver cancer from her excessive drinking habits. We have been together for 2 years, cohabilitate for 1.5years and knowing she lead her entire life as a bar hostess, she has generally changed a lot except she still doesn't do her own laundry/cook and always demand me for a timetable as to how much time to spend with her. She also got an office job after I persuaded her to. For myself, I don't lead a fulfilled sex life because my appetite is high and because of my religion upbringing doesn't cheat or visit escort.

My exs (except the recent) all complains that my appetite is too much. It's not that I want to do it everyday, it's when she initiates and I need 3-5x per session to even be fulfilled. When I am single, I don't even jerk off and friends have been counselling me to DIY to cure this appetite of mine even when I am not single. They even offered to bring me to club and hookup, which I have no interests because of fear for STDs.



Few days back, she told me she wants to get back with me. Close to a FWB until both of us finds a partner and we would go our separate ways. I am terribly sure she isn't trying to find another person because she is too attracted to me in terms of looks, gratitude and in bed. She is the kind that will just visit my area, allocate few hours each week hoping to catch a glimpse of me even months after breakup up til now a year. I am avoiding her because I want a clean break and want her to get on with her life, the only form of communication is email because I blocked all her contacts.



Since we don't stay together anymore, we are not going to argue over housework, not controlling how I plan my schedule, she's the only person that has the closest match to appetite as me in terms of sex. Should I go along with it? I keep having this feel I am ruining her life and I have already gave up on dating knowing how erratic my work schedule can be after promotion.


Do you want to try venturing Thai? If race is a problem to you, then you should not get into a relationship. Limit your sexual provision to the transactional type. A wife needs to be respected, she is not married to you to serve your every need without your effort to reciprocate.
 

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