[question] would you accept...

[newproject]

(a) If gf older than bf by 10 years?

(b) If gf earn double salary of bf

assume you guys have been in a relationship for few years..everything OK, personality , hobbies, values thinking except condition (a) or (b)

Will you marry your gf (if guy) or bf (if you girl)?

bonus q if yes to either question how about if both occur ie girl older by 10 years and earn twice guy salary?

 

[Linus84]

For A
I don't really mind but as you mentioned
We must share the same value, interest and matching personality. But then 1 point to take note will be the external environment. Example like how my family, friends and relatives will react. There a high chance those remarks and feedbacks may indirectly affect my spouse feeling or the relationship . So will be good to address before any future plan. After all you can't control people's mouth so you have balance yourself.

For B
Being a guy I think this is very subjective to the guy ego. Also subject whether a women can accept a guy earning lesser. But critically this topic should never be a argument topic or impulse criticism. Personally I think this is very hard for me to accept also subject to the income gap.

Finally I think as a guy perspective it's very challenging as you need to put down your ego. But if the above criteria can be met then there shall be no issue.

 

[newproject]

For A
I don't really mind but as you mentioned
We must share the same value, interest and matching personality. But then 1 point to take note will be the external environment. Example like how my family, friends and relatives will react. There a high chance those remarks and feedbacks may indirectly affect my spouse feeling or the relationship . So will be good to address before any future plan. After all you can't control people's mouth so you have balance yourself.

For B
Being a guy I think this is very subjective to the guy ego. Also subject whether a women can accept a guy earning lesser. But critically this topic should never be a argument topic or impulse criticism. Personally I think this is very hard for me to accept also subject to the income gap.

Finally I think as a guy perspective it's very challenging as you need to put down your ego. But if the above criteria can be met then there shall be no issue.

Are you 32? so you OK with a wife 42?

but not OK if a similar or younger age peer earn say 12k to your 6k

 

[Linus92]

Yes I'm 32
Hmmm 6k and 12k is a big difference
Personally I will feel uncomfortable
But that's my perception

 

[buddhabar]

For A) it's going to be challenging for a 10 years gap unless the guy is age 45 and above. Because that's when a man matures (sorry if I offended any boys)

As for B) i never understand the issue of women earning more than their partner, unless she goes around telling the whole world. That will become an ego issue then.

 

[miz-Que]

If u have these thoughts, maybe she has them too. 10 yrs age gap is quite big to me.

I am just 4 yrs older than bf, which makes him the same age as my lil bro. I did hesitate initially but after going out n knowing him, age n income doesn't matter anymore.

Its what we want to achieve, looking forward to live together n be happy that matters.

 

[sadman2009]

Newproject, are you doing a survey? From company? Schools? University? Sorry, if you personally have a problem and want to have an advice, you are assured that you will get lots of comments and support here. As this section is Matters of the Heart.
But you are just here to get some numbers or statistics then sorry no comments from me.

 

[newproject]

Newproject, are you doing a survey? From company? Schools? University? Sorry, if you personally have a problem and want to have an advice, you are assured that you will get lots of comments and support here. As this section is Matters of the Heart.
But you are just here to get some numbers or statistics then sorry no comments from me.

If I were doing a survey it would be way more professional lol. Just asking for a friend..

 

[life_is]

Age not the issue. Problems may arise if the woman just wants to be in control. Men I know who are successful either have a supportive woman or no women. Female friends also agree with me that women who look down on other half will just make the man very unlucky. Depends on whether the man is okay to be submissive and whether the women can accept the reality that the age gap will cause the pay gap and other issues.