my parents are very very traditional chinese, but they are very clueless with regards to wedding customs cos everything was settled by my grandparents back when they wedded and i'm the eldest! while his parents are very particular about chinese traditions too and are more well versed as his 2 elder siblings have wedded.
during the parents' meeting, there's no mention of pin jin at all! only discussion on guo da li, and my dad requested for 10 tables. so when i came to read i was kinda shocked that our parents actually missed out such an important step in the chinese customary wedding! but i guess the 10 tables sort of made up for it.
initially my in-laws told my FH that 10 tables a lot (i think they were quite shocked and even asked him to hold cheaper banquet cos they were saying 10 tables is 10k is too expensive) but i asked my parents then they said they just asked for the tables for our relatives, but not say want to take the angpows or wat...
actually the 10 tables are all for our relatives cos our extended family is very big. even with the 10 tables can't invite all of my dad's cousins' families also lor.
but my in-laws insist that we have to follow the tradition and give all the angpows from the 10 tables back to my parents, otherwise not nice. so my parents will secretly pass the $$ back into my account to help us tide over in this financially difficult period. keke~
anyway... i wasn't keen to have big wedding banquet one. wanted something small and cosy just for our personal close friends and relatives, then is his parents want to invite their own friends as well and asked for 12 tables, so have to settle all these BIG banquet stuff. now only our relatives, his relatives and his parents' friends already add up to 22 tables wor! haven't even added in our own friends...
in a sense, my clueless parents actually didn't ask for pinjin etc too. they asked for the tables but will probably take nothing. i was thinking let them take all the angpows back then just return me part of the money to pay the banquet... at least i know my parents deserve it for bringing me up so well despite limited finances.