My (Best) Friend and I..

[rubbishcow]

powder, i gotta agree with you on how different females and males bond. But not all females friendship are so political. Some how i felt thet my gals and I(the very close gal frens)shared the kinda friendship like guys.

Regarding the answer from my guy, I was perpared for the worst. All i need from him is to come clean with me about his relationship with her before we started ours. I believed him because of some other personal factors that i knew he was very honest with his answer. I heard the gal's version of the story..

 

[rubbishcow]

Milo, its a male dominant environment. So its like 90% of the colleagues are guys..

 

[its_fate]

wahahahha... "par pok".. so it's the reverse thingy now... Guys "bitch" around and have small talks during lunch break?????.....

So my Questions come in: "Is it bcoz he dun get what he wish for or he is not in the sms list????? OR Is it to glorify that he is being hooked up????"..... wahahaha... WTH!!

 

[miloice]

haha.... maybe those guys are gosship about that colleauge cos they are hoping ssecretly to be targetted by her.

 

[rubbishcow]

iris and milo, actually all had been targeted by her before.. They got scared by the way she behave and turned out avoiding her.

 

[powder]

chances of her being misunderstood is very high in this case... a girl who will hit on all the guys in her company is very rare, have to be a vixen-spirit trying to suck life out of these guys... is she pretty?

actually milo might have hit the nail with his last post. most would have been smitten by her to be discussing her this way... it's like the story of the older monk who carries the lady across the river, the younger monk could not let it go... so who is the one obsessed with who?

 

[miloice]

Something like that happened during freshmen orientation camp during by uni days. There was this gal that was an attention seeker and overly sociable with guys for most people's comfort. The guy that was laughing and talking about her the most ended up dating her after the camp.

 

[bobochacha]

i have a friend who got the intention to steal my limelight on my wedding eh..said want to wear those can can dress..something like to attract the attention..but end up never ah..i was thinking no matter hw much u wear or make up..attention is always at the bride..

but these kind of words coming from ur gd friend sent a chill dwn ur spine..hahaa

 

[sgbabydoll]

Most ladies will look at the bride while most men will not fix their gaze on the bride only.

 

[alcifertoh]

Hahaha I like that. I mean, you are there to give your blessing and such. Who cares what you are wearing unless you gonna sashay out naked or wardrobe malfunction....(A guy's mentality).

I experienced ladies feeling embarrass and etc if they spot the same gown but for guys, they just laugh over it.

Not trying to start any war here but for such occassions, I feel guys generally dress formally for respect of the occassion but ladies no matter how they deny, they doll up and within them they hope to attract certain amount of attention. Agree? So we can't stop or prevent anyone from trying to steal anyone's lime light.

 

[its_fate]

Somehow agree with doll coz I oso look at other gals when attending such functions... hehehe.. Not necessary to be men..

Not comparing what they are wearing. I would say more on upgrading fashion sense/tips from the ways they dress up...

My wedding ceremony oso juz over. Some of the gals really wear super nice. I will take it as they show respect to my wedding by dressing well..

No hard-feeling towards them coz I can't stop them from wearing nice/chio right =)

 

[vios]

women, in the mould of this bobochacha, think too much liao lah...

simi steal the limelight?
who else will wear a bridal gown to the wedding itself, except for the bride, tio boh?

then again, it's prob a genetic make-up..... there's usually a bitching session after the event. hur hur hur

 

[snoopies]

for me, i will love to have all my guests to really dress up for my event. Limelight will definitely always be on the bride and groom.

I dun mind having a best-dress prize giving for both ladies and the men leh, depending on the theme and such. But of coz, i dun need any wayangs to be around. ^_^

 

[salsa_babe]

well vios...i did heard of one incident...

the gf of the bride's BIL...wore an elaborate gown (as good as a bridal gown)...had a tiara and appeared in most of the pictures taken that night.

hahahaha...maybe she took it as a trial run for herself

 

[its_fate]

salsa - So, did she win the "最佳女猪角" that night??? hehehe...

Dun bother about such people. It only show how much EQ they have =)..

 

[salsa_babe]

hearsay...the bride was superly angry lor.

hahaha....

 

[vios]

wah, really got ah?

if i'm the bride, no need to be angry...
cos that woman is actually clowning herself mah.

 

[its_fate]

Exactly... Why angry? 大人有大é‡...

Proven such people no EQ, oso no IQ... wahahaha...

 

[alcifertoh]

I think I would juz laugh over the wayang act. What's with the tiara somemore? the BIL got wear crown bo? hahaha Someone please offer the rod and lead the chariots. Overkill lah lol

 

[vios]

ya lor.... gotta learn from iris..

and her Visual Art of the middle finger on her wedding night.

 

[salsa_babe]

hahahaha....tiara goes well with the gown mah

 

[its_fate]

vios - How U know? U saw it huh? this is really my 招牌动作... I will "NAH"..

But really lah, no need angry de.. No point spoilt my day bcoz of her...

 

[salsa_babe]

Iris...you are so not gu niang de

tsk tsk tsk

 

[vios]

yeah, i think i kena before (over this forum!)

and didn't u receive my "reply"?

hahahaha.

 

[vios]

salsa, u don't know meh...

she is likened to the tigress who had to dress in the lamb's suit to 'please' the ram on their mating session...

sibeh interesting.

 

[alcifertoh]

Iris would likely "nah" all of her guests over the yum seng toast. Her 招牌动作 mah haha

 

[vios]

muahahaha..... reminds me of the ex-WWE wrestler - stone cold steve austin.

 

[its_fate]

simi sai lah...

I am who I am.. no need to dress up in lamb's suit...

But hoh, I dun mind dress up like "mee cee" aka nurse... wahahaha.. "slurpy"....

 

[salsa_babe]

why not a Pontianak?

hahahahaha.........


*scram*

 

[alcifertoh]

How about Janitor? Then you can role play the toilet cleaning aunty and rape your hubby while he is taking a pee haha.

*Disclaimer* I have respect for all occupations and purely suggesting to Iris on irritating grounds.

 

[its_fate]

vios - My fav is Bret Hart... too bad he si liao..

salsa - U dress up lor... wahahah.. juz in time for Halloween =)

 

[alcifertoh]

Bret hart is still alive...

 

[its_fate]

wait.. shit.. it's Owen Hart... paisay,, my mistakes...

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

It's almost 3 months since my ROM.

Best friend was the last to arrive, after the whole solemnization process ended. We didn't get to talk much during the lunch and we stopped contacting each other since then.

A part of me was angry with her for really missing the most important moment of my life.

A part of me felt sad to see that friendship has turned so bad.

I wanted to do something to salvage the friendship but really dunno how to do it, so for the last 3 months, I just leave things as it is.

Yesterday, I suddenly have the thought of dropping her a casual email, to ask her how's life because I saw her updates in facebook and it seemed like she is not happy lately. And see if we can try to talk things out or not. Probably, we can still be good friends once we sort out our differences.

Her reply was all about blaming me..

For outcasting her,
For not needing her anymore,
For spending time with others,
For sharing joy with others and not just with her,
For chucking her one side,


Lastly, she wrote :

"Forgive and forget , yah, might as well.~
So why dun u , carry on with ur good life ahead.
While I can better off on my own , alone , by myself since I've been managing so far so good for the whole of 2009."

It is so difficult to tell myself that this friendship is gone..

 

[lovingyou]

Funtasty: With her current mentality, it is not easy to convince her that her friendship still means a lot to you. Not sure if she is envious or probably jealous of you... it could also be that something major does happen to her and yet, you aren't there for her etc... The bottomline is this friendship will not that close as before till perhaps either 1) she open herself to you again or 2) she finally understand ur feelings after she is attached herself. Btw, what was ur reply to all her accusations?

 

[powder]

someone's gotta put down the pride abit... problem is some pple guys keep things inside instead of talking, and when talking it turns confrontational... if u really want something back, u gotta do better... if u decide to do better, u gotta let go abit of the bruised ego...

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

littlewoman,

I dunno what to reply her. It is true that I've neglected her when I start to search for new flat, bz with reno and then with wedding preps..

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

powder,

I've put aside my pride and ego by writing to her first. I wanna do it better but dunno how, really. She seemed so firm with just letting it go.

 

[powder]

u have to ask yourself if u have left her out of things... sometimes i get them involved not becos i really need them involved, but cos i treasure their involvement, their opinions, their ideas n for the sake of company! it's how we grow together in life... maybe it's a guy thing, we stay abreast of each other's goings-on. i think ladies only go toilet/spa/shopping/salon together... those Really Impt things - not really.

 

[lovingyou]

Funtasty: ur neglection means? Care to elaborate?

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

powder,

I miss going to toilet with her, I miss hanging out with her for KTV sessions, makan sessions etc..but she has been extremely cold and sarcastic towards me since I started dating...I've tried a few times to arrange activities with her but everytime, I went home feeling very upset over the crude things she say to me..Until a point, I decided to not do anything. That is also when I started to get bz with preparations.

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

littlewoman,

I spent lesser time with her. I work part time at her clinic during weekends then. We used to have activities after the session ends, like going ktv or go for a good meal. Instead, I have lunch with her then go off to meet my husband. She was not happy whenever I need to go off and she would be very cold to me for the next few days..

 

[powder]

well that's how it started... will depend on if she's willing to let it go too, if she can't then u just have to be patient. i think pple dun realise that if they should die tomoro... who are the pple they will appreciate and say 'thank u for being in my life, i love u'

 

[lovingyou]

Hmm... I guess it is jus a pinch that she is feeling... probably, she jus can't get over the fact that u are dating while she is alone, and feeling the sudden lost of company in her free time. Hmm... There are only 2 options, either wait for her to open up again or simply give it up... No point to upset urself further, life is short, is it realli that worth it to get upset over someone who doesn't treasure the friendship etc?

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

littlewoman,

She is not alone. She is in a distant relationship with a French guy..she talked abt going over to live with him etc..She was attached even before I met my husband.

She was supposed to be in France on the very Xmas eve when my husband proposed to me..some changes in plan and she couldn't go..Ever since then I broke out the news to her abt the proposal, she was sarcastic to me whenever I share with her about my stuff..

I really dun understand her mentality.

 

[lovingyou]

Hmm... Is her r/s with this guy stable?

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

They have known each other for almost 2 years and she flown over there and met him once. When she return from holidays, she told me that the guy wanted her to go over to live with him. That's all I know.

In fact, I know from a mutual fren that, she is planning to go over this year. I think that is also why I felt we shd clear the air before she leaves the country.

 

[lovingyou]

It takes 2 for any rs or friendship to work out, since it is jus one-sided in ur case, let it be...

 

[funtasty_funtasty]

littlewoman,

I read her reply many times..I think there is really nothing I can do..I have to move on..

 

[hoddioo]

funtasty

Help your friend become a better person
She may be actually in need for some kind of help to become a more mature person..