Man are not reliable


New Member
At the start,he promises this and that.
say i am the only woman he loves...he will not love others..coz he has decided..

2 years down the road.when i put on little weight..maybe sian liao..he injects acidic words to hurt me when wanna to dump me.
eg Love is like a business transaction, only making use of each other, you got own legs, cant u walk back home yourself, you so good in crying, why dont u use your talent to join e mediacorp...etc

though life moves on..
make me so fearful of new relationships..will not want history to repeat itself

being single for 2 years......


New Member
Hi icepanda, I understand how you feel as I'm going thru this suitation now. Husband wants a divorce as he said that we r not compatible and he wants a spouse who can strive hard and excel in career. I'm too simple minded and easily contented... blah blah blah.... All sorts of excuses and reasons will come out from his mouth... And we are married for 5 YEARS. Now going thru selling house, we r still staying together but sleep separately and will be looking for lawyers for divorce.
It's being tough and I'm struggling hard with sleepless and crying at nights...
But life still goes now... I havent haave to courage to tell my parents about it as they will be totally shattered and worried about me.... I am really sad and live like a zombie now...


New Member
Dear coffee lover,

Sorry to hear your story.
Well, i guess as a woman, though we are emotionally shattered, we still need to face e reality of life.
The man's heart can never be the same again.
It can still changed dun noe hw many years down the road even if he can promise you the moon and stars now.

Dont be sad. I am sure your real frends will be there to help you.
Better to tell your parents abt tat, coz the faults i believe is not from you rite.
Just that no point dragging a relationship that does not bloom.

Be brave. Be strong. You are a woman who can do it

As for me, there is a new man in my life.
But watever actions he had done and promises are exactly like 90% what my ex did when hes after and with me last time.

I just worried that he is another 'history remade'
But this time, i will not be believing 100% of what man said.
I still give myself more 'rooms' and exposures and does not cut myself away from others as i used to do last time.Give myself some 'backup' plans

I have 'died' once when whole word seem to crash on me when he wanted to dump me.

This time i will not be so emotionally involved, but of course i will still put my little heart into, just see hw things goes

but hor, when i hug him, ex images have come flashing bk, and you know, singapore is such a small place, things where now he brings me are what ex bought me too.Stimes dun want to say out to existing one,say dun like this place or what.else he will be unhappy..
haiz. wat a irony...

Same place. Same spot. Same Gal. Different Timings with different man..Haiz


New Member
Hi Icepanda,

I really wonder why woman always suffer.... 3 yrs ago, he wanted a divorce as he was seeing another one. Many times happened and lastly we were together again. I told myself if I wnat to save this relationship, I must "forgive & forget" which I made it!

This time, he's using compatibility as a reason to end this marriage. He's a agressive with HIGH expectation in his work therefore he now said that he cant communicate with me and I dont understand his level of stess etc....

Haiz... I'm quite "dead" too as I'm so used to be with him. We live together, 2 of us only, used to dine, travel, shopping, ktv, movies together... But now he dont talk to me at all at home, treat me like "transparent". When I ask him out for dinner, it's always a "NO". He doesnt ans or reply my sms... Which now I'm so tired of doing it too. He comes home and will shut himself in the bedroom, alone. Me doing my own things, alone too.... I really wonder why a man who used to love me is doing this to me. What's the use of marriage and exchanging vows... Hais...

I have my problem for not telling my family as this is not the first time about getting divorce. And my parents are staying with my brother's family with wife and 2 children.It will be rather inconvenient for me to move in at all. I jusy simply have no shelter over my head at all. That's why I'm still "suffering" in this house.

I feel it's like the end of the world and my income is not high so finances is another issue again... Really lost and dont know what to do....


New Member
Hi coffee lover,

Feel so sad that you have to suffer this alone.
Man changed easily.
Once can pamper you, later can ignore you.

But for one thing,gal, you must be strong.
You can breath and live on your own.
Starting doing your own things you love, go for sports, do things you are passionate with, join clubs and make new frends, Learn new language/culture, go for travel and make yourself beautiful again.
If you tik you are fat, go exercise. If you think you are not pretty, make yourself beautiful by wearing better and facial etc.
That is what i do.Learn new language. Do new sport. Learn new skill. Reduce many weights.
Be happy and glad that there are good frends ard to listen to you

Soon, frends ard you will see the difference in you.
You will have new life. Not just centred ard this guy.
No point.Give yourself a new chance to look more confident and radiant and not to be demean by men

Who knows. With your new outlook and confidence, he may come begging you instead next time.

Money no have. Go earn loh.You have 2 legs 2 hands. You will not be left alone in this world.
After divorce, of coz i am not encouraging you to that, woman will get benefits rite.
Not your fault what.
Any1 can advise on this?as i have no experience.

As in what i am trying to say. The life is yours. You live it yourself.

Dispair also one day. Why not make full use of each day happily.
Hurt of coz will be there. Dark Shadows will there be there. But life continues and you need to FIGHT for your own freedom

You can do it, babe............


New Member
Thanks babe... Actually I'm slim n rather ok looking cos i love to makeup n dress up n have many male/female friends & colleague who r always here for me... but somehow, the feelings is diff.

I know once i make the first step out, I will be able to make it thru... but is the first step that is SO TOUGH to make it.... I am also trying my best to control my emotions n not to think about him.... trying hard....

I hope I can make it thru n at the end of the day, MAN ARE NOT RELIABLE!!!


New Member
hi coffee lover,

Make yourself happy.
Go out with good galfrends and frends.
Have fun and enjoy your life.

Sooner, you will be happier.
Him will be there least prority in your life then

Sure you can make it

Initial is hard. But you must be strong to take the lead out.

Sooner you will lead you own happy life.

Like a Reborn Baby ;)


Well-Known Member
yah, bash men with your emotions. I don't see how reliable that is. JOKE OF THE DAY!

You said it yourself..."Same place. Same spot. Same Gal. Different Timings with different man..Haiz"... DIFFERENT MEN. But, you choose to link and condemn MEN. Kind of women I siam far far from. Magical creativity to link anything under the sun together but plain failure to rationalize and differentiate the individual. Is that so difficult to realize you made a bad choice in your ex and view your current relationship differently? ITS RIDICULOUS TO LINK HIM TO YOUR EX.


New Member
MiLo On e RoCkS (miloice)

Good choice at the start..bad choice at the end as he changed 360degree coz of other fault meh?

women are always e more vulnerable creatures.
emotionally hurt...more.


Well-Known Member
Relationships is NEVER about fault finding. As well as one remains in this fault finding mode, it itself will work against the relationship. No one is EVER FAULTLESS in any relationship. You can pick up more valuable lessons that MEN is unreliable or its all his fault.

Most of these 'changes' are merely unexpose parts of a personality. Their weakness and flawed character. There are so many factors that would influence the change in a person. That's when the true colors will be revealed. He was never a good choice. Just appearing to be good from the surface.

"women are always e more vulnerable creatures.
emotionally hurt...more." COMPLETELY DISAGREE. Its a view to victimize yourself and gender. Generally, women are more emotional. But, it doesn't mean men are not hurt emotionally. Neither does it mean its always the women that is suffering. This kind of sweeping statement reveal strong opinionated views. In fact, this is one of the key barrier to communication. The guy simply let the gal win. No point talking, its one way, her idea.


New Member
"""""Most of these 'changes' are merely unexpose parts of a personality. Their weakness and flawed character. There are so many factors that would influence the change in a person. That's when the true colors will be revealed. He was never a good choice. Just appearing to be good from the surface. """"""

how true this statement is.


Well-Known Member
to add... it should made you reflect over when you deem as good choice. Perhaps, your criteria list isn't really what is needed in a really good partner. The experience should make you wiser in your judgement rather than tint it with sweeping generic stereo-typing.


Active Member
panda, u think ur ex represents the entire male population meh? be careful hor, now u're not against one but all manhood leh :p

ur current damn suay ar...



New Member
Just appearing to be good from the surface. """"""
===This one is kinda of true

junkie:-never have the intention to against all manhood..just kinda of 'building up a wall' against male species..heeee

now i open my eyes big big to see the current loh


Active Member
isn't the solution staring u gals in the face???

since men are not reliable - then date women.

since both of u seem to get along, why not icepanda date coffee lover and we close this thread?

i'm sure women/women relationships will guarantee 100% reliability and absolute joy every minute of your life.

if the 2 of u decide to get together, i'll be glad to sponsor u 2 strap-on dildoes, a 1-way, and a 2-way.


New Member
what a sweeping statement...haiz.

u kena one man like this so naturally u assume ALL men also like that lah?

typical stereotyping mindset...

I can also tell u NOT ALL women are reliable how? wanna rebuke me? hahaha


Active Member
Yeah, all men are unreliable.. only because all women are stupid to believe that they are reliable.

So while you can blame all men, look at yourself in the mirror.. why you so stupid to believe in unreliable men?


Active Member
today i late for work becos of the bus...

buses are late and unreliable.

wait... i could have gotten an earlier bus? or taken the MRT. i could have started walking last nite and reached work liao...

why the hell i opted for a bus?

hmm... my bad.


Active Member
"but hor, when i hug him, ex images have come flashing bk, and you know, singapore is such a small place, things where now he brings me are what ex bought me too.Stimes dun want to say out to existing one,say dun like this place or what.else he will be unhappy.. haiz. wat a irony... Same place. Same spot. Same Gal. Different Timings with different man..Haiz"

Is this for real? Sorry, just feel this is so drama serial type of plot.


New Member
powder (powder)
-you are indeed very 'supportive'..and tks for your 'sponsorships'

doLL (sgbabydoll)
-Of course for real..
Singapore is indeed very small ah
esp when you go pator to the place the very 1st will more or less remember that more clearly.

Go pator place got mostly those few-city areas.

Last time go
sembawang bottle tree village
vivo city etc

Of coz, same place. Same spot. different timing with different men..


Active Member
Ice Panda, I find your ability to link your ex and current beau, and the places you went with your ex and that with your current bf, drama-like. You cannot forget your ex?


New Member
the man i love the past lah..

now the current one is slowly building mah..
so more of less will 'link'


Active Member
i'm just amazed that 2 different men brought u to these places which i never actually put in 'pator' list... vivo maybe... but the rest for pator...

no orchard, no esplanade, no east coast, no bugis etc etc... it's like u guys hang around provision shops and buy resale handphones as part of dating. keke


Active Member
Yah, Ice Panda, how come you paktor in heartlands? What is there to do there?

Instead of telling your bf that you don't like a certain place, you can always suggest new places to explore.

Even though sometimes my bf and I go to places whereby my ex-bfs and I had gone before, it doesn't bring back memories of my ex-es. I could separate past from present. Sometimes it's not good to be too sentimental.


New Member
if u said it's oredi the past why shld there be a link?

Die that cannot go partor liao...everywhere u go, memories of your ex will be crawled back


Active Member
i can't help but picture them browsing 2nd hand mobile phones in tpy, checking into hotel 81 in balestier, cheong junction 8 in bishan, fish prawn in sembawang, and go vivo splash at the 3rd floor water area...

mine more orthodox... consist of Movies, Plays, Events etc...


New Member
doLL (sgbabydoll) -heartland malls are to shop ard nearby lah..

i did mention to the towns as well..


i know over liao..but long time ago..
time to move on..i know..

memories are there..wun forget ...but its already over



New Member
Icepanda, it's not fair to say men are unreliable when you've only met one unreliable man. There are good men out there.


Active Member
no lah, i just cannot get over it... i just went tpy last week to buy 2nd hand handphone. or else go there sell handphone, or drink Koi bubble tea... there's nothing there that feels like it can present any decent dating experience unless u're super young...


New Member
icepanda, you mean where are the good men? I know a few personally, so I disagree with the point that "men are not reliable". True, not ALL men are reliable, but the same goes for women too. But we cannot just generalize like that.