Lost, Need Advice

[wat_are_dreamz]

Hi Spiderman, i can't speak for every female. But for myself, even if i were to have wedding jitters, i wld speak w my gfs n not tell my bf tat i need time to consider. Cos i am matured enough to understand tat sometimes we have abit of fear n anxiety over the future. Being scared n worried abt the long road ahead doesnt mean i dun want to spend my life w my bf. It just means its a gd time to go for a drink w the gals.

For ur case, it sounds as though ur gf is not even interested in the marriage. If she is really having wedding jitters, chances are she shd be feeling confused n confiding in her close frens, not playing mahjong. Plus i wonder y is it tat after 4yrs+ of courtship, u arent close to her family? Unless she isnt close to them. If she is close to her family n frens, then u shd have made the effort to forge a comfortable r/ship w them.

I wld strongly recommend u to postpone the wedding. U apparently do not understand her heart, though u keep saying nothing has changed. Truth is tat ur r/ship doesnt seem strong n stable at all. Both of u might be at v different stages of ur life. Dun make the mistake of following thro w the marriage plans, only to be trapped in a lonely marriage or end up in divorce. Wateva it is, stop the plans for now n sit down to really trash things out.

 

[vios]

Spiderman, i needed to point it out because you look upon the part on "don't have much time" as the main problem.... when the real problem lies with you, actually.

your thoughts are very very lame as you have revealed that your motive is not to get caught in the tight spot to face or answer your parents. do you actually know how she feels abt this upcoming marriage, or do you just care abt how you feel?

whatever hell she is confused abt, "don't have much time" is a super bad reason to 'coerce' her on an immediate answer, and additionally, is doubly-dumb because of the various arrangements with vendors. you should seek for alternatives with them instead of pushing through the schedule when the bride is not mentally ready.

just why it seems like you're marrying the non-living stuffs instead of a human being.

 

[mum_of_2_girls]

Hi Powder,

I don't understand why is there more adultery in real estate. Can elaborate?

 

[powder]

 

[powder]

if i elaborate, i'm gonna get burnt as hell... it's too complicated to explain, yet so easy to understand that an explanation is never needed. just take note can liao... certain jobs attract certain types of pple...

 

[miloice]

The fundamentals of relationship to sustain a marriage isn't even there. So what if expectations change? If one is finding that so damn hard to communicate with their partner about, then its already a serious issue with the relationship. Its worrying that you seem to be the last to know what's on her mind. You don't need a 3rd party. The presence of a 3rd party itself probably isn't the problem, but it emphasize the issues that were actually all the long clearly obvious to her.

Share with your spouse and soulmate of what and who we truly are without fear. This works both ways. You wouldn't be clueless if the communication is all the long there. You would have some ideas on what's bothering her. And any guy that couldn't understand his partner's emotions should really worry! This is like the number one need ladies have... for someone understanding. Someone that can connect and empathize with them. Someone there for them... Not a stupid blur sotong that is grabbing onto his last straws but still no idea what is going on.

 

[miloice]

powder, my guess is the temptation of money and power and indecent proposals from clients with the big bucks?

They basically get to meet daily all kinds of successful men from all walks with great buying power.

 

[matka]

... or women.

 

[powder]

milo, not really.. if that happens it's one-off... i'm referring more to agents within their teams n groupies.

 

[sgbabydoll]

Taxi drivers too hahaha