Is it normal to have man who didnt celebrate GF's Birthday?


New Member
Hi to guys and gals,

I would like to have everyones' view about man who didnt celebrate girlfriend's birthday.
Is it normal for a man to do this?

My bf of mine had to miss my birthday because he has to go back to his hometown to attend 2 weddings there. He knows it.

He remembered it before he booked his bus ticket, which is 2 days before my birthday.
He was telling he "ai ya, got to miss out my birthday le".

He did not initiate anything hence I thought he would do something before he leave for the bus on Tuesday.

Nothing......Nothing at all. Just only a call from him at Tuesday evening telling me that he arrived at Golden Mile Complex le, and put down the phone liao.


I dun know about you guys but I was really mad and deeply disappointed with him.

I never have a guy (I mean NEVER) who claimed to love me and nothing done on my birthday......
Can't he celebrate with me before he leave?
Or least give me a pre birthday greetings on phone?

To me,(dun know about other gals out there) it is my most important day.

He lets me feel that I am just not "dear" enough to him...... or significant in his heart......

I apologise here if there is any word misuse.

Pls share your views. Thanks.


Well-Known Member
Hard to advise if your focus is only on the birthday. How does he treat you normally??

Maybe, he just an insensitive dude or not into birthdays kind of guy. Or maybe, he is really not into you at all.

You do not need to wait for once a yr date to realize if your relationship is working. No point finding out how 'normal' or not he really is. Rather, find out who he is.

This year, hardly any celebration for my wife too. We were travelling. So, we just got a bread toast during transit in replacement of a bday cake.

"To me,(dun know about other gals out there) it is my most important day."
This is dangerously childish and naive. You are not some small kid that will get mad with daddy not coming back to celebrate and candles for you. No day is more important than the relationship itself. Be it Xmas, anniversary or birthday.
Just as no wedding day or banquet is more important than the marriage and relationship itself.


New Member
To MiLo,

Our relationship huh?.... Hmmm....
He will get very close to me for a couple of days, then a distant for another couple of days.
Been like this for like quite some time.
We been together for almost 2 years....
I dun quite confirm is this call "working"?

Good question that you ask - "Or maybe, he is really not into you at all. "
Well, maybe he isnt into me... but I cant really tell. What's ur advise on this?

Not that I acted like kid but I feel sad that he remembered all other non-important ppl's dates but not mine.....

Well, at least you give ur wife a cake as a replacement. I have none.

I only know that this year, I realised that he was observing me if I would do something for his birthday. Of course I did.(Before he starts to observe,I 'm already waiting for his b'day)
A simple birthday cake though. He was happy and pleased.

Which explains why I was very disappointed because natuarally, I presumed he will at least sms me, call me but.....
Of course nothing in a relationship is more important than being happy with each other everyday.

There is a saying - If being happy in a relationship everyday, is a Valentine's day everyday."
(something like that)

I know and I agree too but we erm, not say unhappy but like what I mentioned above,
some days close, some days distant.Then how?


New Member
To MiLo,

"Rather, find out who he is".
Any tips on this for me?
I want to know who he is too and I also want to find out whether is he into me.


Well-Known Member

it is strange that a lot in your relationship is left to guesses. How long have u guys been together? Does he gets upset when you initiate to talk about things? Do you fear upsetting him? How often do you guys share and align your thoughts and goals? Is the relationship more sexual or emotionally connected? Do you spend quality time to get to know each other? Their life, family, hobbies etc. You don't seem to know much of him. I don't have answers. Just some questions to explore further.

Dates are not that important to us. Its fun to plan stuffs together in celebration. But, in honesty, we have been so busy that have forgotten and missed anniversaries several times already. What's more important is to take quantity time together and keeping the relationship and connection strong.


Active Member
so instead of telling him how u feel, u would go One HUGE round around the world and ask everyone except him - to judge him, judge his love, and determine where u stand...

just wondering, did u call mum to thank her for going thru the pain to deliver u on Your bday?

i hope u did, although i know 90% of pple dun even realise it. they are too engrossed in themselves to remember their mums...


New Member
i usually spend my birthday with my husband since we got married but i would also spend another day celebrating with my family .. i bring them out to makan instead of expecting a treat from them.

if you are disappointed, why can't you just tell him la?


New Member is sweet when we have our partner remembering and celebrating our bday

but do not judge them juz bcoz they din do it the way you hope

Communication is impt in any r'ship. If you have concerns abt him not celebrating your bday...then you have to tell him.

It's not that difficult to talk to your partner, right?


Well-Known Member
Often, when one comes in with perceived issues about birthday, wedding preparation, inlaw probs etc. The issue actually lies elsewhere. Things so obvious but blind to the person herself.

The basic fundamentals of the relationship is already weak or non existence and yet they are still guessing and relying on what he/she does during a birthday to find out if the relationship is even working.

"Of course nothing in a relationship is more important than being happy with each other everyday.
There is a saying - If being happy in a relationship everyday, is a Valentine's day everyday."
(something like that)"

I actually disagree with that. Emotions are always in a wave. There will be highs and lows. There is absolutely nothing anyone can do to make it a constant. What's important is the connection, flame and communication remains strong despite the lows.


Well-Known Member
I remember the 1st time I left urgently for KL for biz prospect 8 yrs back, I did it in a hurry only leaving a SMS for my wife (then gf).

She was fuming mad. Insensitive? I agree. But, do I have all the time and luxury in the world? No, it is a big rush and the opportunity came at the last minute. Of cos, I would grab it.

But what happens after? Did she stop dating me? No, she told me her disappointment and anger. And worked things out and made up after. No one is born sensitive and understanding. Especially for guys. There are some gender traits that we need to realize. Learn to handle it together as a couple.

She was a very clingy woman and have the usual insecurities and uncertainties. E.g. when she is out with friends, she finds it unloving and unattentive that I do not call her to find out how is she. etc. Many guys will not even take those nonsenses frankly. But, we talked things out and progressed together. We learn to realize each other pov, the importance of each minor stuffs and why our partner think nothing about it. They are not stupid idiots. Just different from us. And we will change and progress ourselves. Its important now, but in future, we could be laughing at how naive or childish all this really is!

TALK, COMMUNICATE, VOICE IT OUT. No need to fight, get upset and guess guess and guess. The more uncertainties you leave to guesses, the more negative one becomes. This is pretty human nature.


Active Member

So what it is not normal for a bf not to want to spend birthday with gf?

And yes, personally I think at the very least a call or SMS should be provided.

Obviously he is not the "normal bf" that you are looking for or he is not really so much into you.. then what you need to do?

- tell him your expectation

Or you can't even communicate to him what you need and want?


New Member
I didn't go ONE huge round telling the whole world except him.
I smsed him about how his actions made me feel about him before I started the thread. (voicing out)

He took till next day then called me. I was still fuming then hence I did not pick up his call, he apologised to me via sms anyway. (I have always pick up or return his calls but just not this time)

I was partially curious about what other ppl's relationship.
How many relationships have their partner treat their loves one b'day as another day?

My main fuming point is about him not even giving my birthday a little personal thought.
I firmly believed that if it is someone whom you sincerely care or love, you would at least give that someone's b'day a little thought regardless of situation.(I dun mean money or gifts) I mean there is no way you will treat it like another day.

I remembered when I was in my teens, I was so poor that I could not afford presents, cards to my best friends, still I would call them or personally give my greetings.
Its thoughts that counts.

Like what sm said, I personally felt he can give me a call or sms. That's why I was angry, my anger comes from disappointment. I think.

I was wondering does man behaves like that ? is it normal?
I understand man and woman thinks different. But how different?

Well, MiLo, you did give ur then gf a sms in a rush. still you did give.
I am not that illogical. I would have understand ur situation which precisely I dun understand his situation - he is not in rush, his hometown trip was pre-planned with plenty of time. wth!


New Member
Hi hotsnow,

Sometimes, I pitied the Man. They have to remember so many dates.

The impt dates increases if you are married and with kids. ( wife and children birthday, mother's day, valentine, rom, wedding aniversary, new year day, christmas day)

So, my hubby will buy for me jewellery every CNY. and tells me it's also for my birthday, valentine and wedding aniversary.

I don't give him a hard time if he forgets my birthday as he is very sweet to me everyday.

My hubby doesn't like sweet things and doesn't like me to spend money on him.

So what I did for his birthday is I will prepare a mini concert for him.

I will play the Happy Birthday Song on the piano and the children will be singing and performing a dance. Hubby really likes it and we have so much fun together.


New Member
Pls dun get me wrong.

I started this thread purely just to find out what it should be and what it should not be.
Not to justify anything.

To MiLo,

we have been together for 2 years.
he does treat me well,
he is alright with it when I talk about things.
I do not fear him.
He is a day- to- day guy so not much thoughts for him to share with me when he is back. He just wanted rest and relax when he is back.
We do have lots of quality time to spend together because I always waited for him when he intends to come over. So nowadays I have become night owl - sleep about 1-2am....sometimes 3am.
He has no relative here in SG so.... I do not know about his family, his hobbies in superb details.
Went back to meet his family in his home town once though.
He hardly go back to his hometown - only once a yr. Jus that he have something to attend this yr thats why he invited me.

Since now you talk about it, I find him a little wierd - I noticed that he always seems like on the brink of giving up our relationship whenever we have arguments. (luckily < 4 times)
I am always the one to break ice and voice our differences first.

I dun know what sort of truama relationship he had before knowing me. I tried to probe but of course he didnt tell. hehe!
I guess most guys wouldnt tell ba.

I did managed to find out that he is very afraid that I would mind very much that he dun have time for me.
Dun know why.
I have reassured him in this case.

But now, - no time and no thoughts are 2 different matter!


Well-Known Member
hotsnow, u don't need to answer to me. These questions are really suggestions for you to really reflect on your relationship with him. You should really focus on the relationship itself and not the ability to remember dates. If you really find it so important to remember dates, get him a PDA or add reminders to his mobile calendar. That's about it.

As I mentioned, both wife and myself have already forgotten several anniversaries. It doesn't matter to us at all. We miss it, we can always make up on another day.

"Since now you talk about it, I find him a little wierd - I noticed that he always seems like on the brink of giving up our relationship whenever we have arguments. (luckily < 4 times)
I am always the one to break ice and voice our differences first."
Seems to me he isn't comfortable to speak of his thoughts.


New Member
Write him a letter, put at a place that will catch his attention. Voice out whatever concerns you have. better to trash things out now then face this issues all over and over again, worst still after marriage..


Well-Known Member
think the issue here isn't with hotsnow not voicing out but its pretty much one way. He doesn't respond nor open up.

hotsnow, let him feel comfortable to voice out. Work on differences without needing to make him feel its a complain about him. Slowly build up confidence in the communication channels in working things out together. Encourage sharing and don't respond negativity to what he tells u. Don't try to fix him unless he is asking for your advice.

But, it is probably in his character to be this quiet. Can u accept that?

For me, the guy needs to take more initiative lah. This is my preference, I rather take the initiative than be led around.


New Member
"Don't try to fix him unless he is asking for your advice."
I hate this.... I know men dun like ppl to change/ fix them.
But its very hard to accept that he is in wrong/ having wrong perception and yet ask myself to agree that - yeah, its ok.
Worse still is he dosent think what so wrong about it....

Dun worry, he wont ask for my advice on his flaws/
So usually what I do is 2 methods:
Go 1 big round and "shoot" him in half joke, half serious tone.
If it didnt work and he persist, 2nd method: I do just the same to him.

argh....most of the time ,he did realise what went wrong but most likely will go back same ways after stoppping / change a while.

MiLo, you have quite in insight. It is true that he is kind of quiet though he can talks alot of "fei hua" when work.

Marriage? yah better to sort out first. sorry ,its find out first.


New Member

In one of our break ice moment, I remember once he did ask me not to change him because that is not him.

What does that means?
Allow him to continue whatever he thinks deems fit?

I rebutted that didnt we learnt in school that we ought to correct our mistake when we are in wrong?

I didnt want to change him to my prince charming standards.
I understand very well that every man has his personality differences.
But to accept the "no intention to correct his /her own mistake", i find it very tough.....


then just break up with him. that are romantic guys out there who will make you feel like you are having a birthday celebration everyday.


New Member
Nah..... I dun want break up, its not on my mind.

Break up = point of no return
Break up = zero mutual attraction
Break up = fastest solution on short term basis

I preferred to know him deeper and see how me and him can work things out.
If everyone jus takes the fastest way like that, no one can ever find a soulmate.
We are all born with different personalities.
We may even have differences, arguments with our PARENTS who gave birth to us,know us, let alone someone who is not related.

Furthermore we definitely still have mutual attraction -
We enjoyed just hugging each other (bear hug) or lying on his/ mine's lap while watching TV,online chinese movies, soccer matches (very little verbal)

We enjoyed some pranks on each other, quote 3 examples -
1. Like purposely lying full weight on him when he is reading or watching or playing psp.
2. Purposely smack his salivia on me/ my bed or pillow.
3. Attempt to pull each other shorts/pants in living room or open place.

I remembered the first time when I played a prank (prank no.1) on him (he was totally unaware, caught on), instead of being angry,he acted like he is in pain synchronisingly.

I knew he is or can be THE ONE.

Who?Me?, I DUN NEED to have someone to make it like celebration everyday.
I will appreciate very much when he showed that he does think of me.


Well-Known Member
Hi hotsnow,

u wrote :
"I rebutted that didnt we learnt in school that we ought to correct our mistake when we are in wrong?

I didnt want to change him to my prince charming standards.
I understand very well that every man has his personality differences.
But to accept the "no intention to correct his /her own mistake", i find it very tough....."

Tell me, how much we learn in school is really practical and useful frankly? Few issues I see here...
1) Does he thinks its wrong? Or does he thinks it doesn't matter. Its what you say only. So, better shut up then to be challenged by you.
2) How important is it? No one live perfectly correct lives. If its not important, is there a need to change it?
3) Even if you want him to improve, u need to allow him to realize it for himself and not led him by the nose on what's right or wrong and what to do. This is basic respect and EQ that one should have.
4) Many things are subjective and lies pretty much in the grey areas. Dealing with grey and sensitive stuffs, u need to use lots or EQ and empathy if you would to influence someone to agree with you willingly.
5) If you need to fix and correct everything that you deem as wrong, then be warned. You will find many wrongs in life and marriage. Trying to fix all of them will make you overwhelm. Good for you that you are not considering marriage now. You would be ready when you are able to 'see open' to all these differences. Its not all wrongs, just differing priorities, opinions and values. If it isn't important, don't even need to spend any effort to analyze and think further!

This is my advise.
The key to improvement is reflection. If you would like to instill some improvements, then focus on influencing him to think and reflect. No one can change simply because of what others tell him/she. They change because they reflected on what happen, things that people said and feedback and he/she frankly understand and believe it is beneficial and right to change.

Also, u wrote :
"Break up = point of no return
Break up = zero mutual attraction
Break up = fastest solution on short term basis"
I completely disagree with that.
Break up can mean drastically different things to different people and situation. I broke up with my ex not because I had no more emotions or attraction for her. But, simply, my heart for her is dead. I see no way we could be happy together. Its either one or both of us suffering to hold on to the emotions. It is not the fastest solution and its not short term. It took me yrs to finally able to make that decision and stick with it.

My wife also broke up with me after few months of dating. Obviously, in that case, it was not point of no return. In fact, an important milestone and turning for our relationship. The months apart, helped us reflect on all the issues we had and made us cherish each other even more.

I really don't understand your last msg about mutual attraction. What is it for. Maybe you can clarify what you are trying to tell here? No offense, but it is sounding pretty kiddish frankly. I completely don't see the link of these pranks with what you are trying to work on your communication with your guy.

Personally, I avoid dating confrontal women at all costs. To me, they are opinionated and lacks basic EQ and priority. i.e. they don't know what's important to them and busy feeling so much about themselves managing people around them. This is my personal frank view because I know exactly what I don't want in a partner.

Lastly :
"I will appreciate very much when he showed that he does think of me."

This one, everyone have already advised u.
TELL HIM and don't wait, expect and then get disappointed. Hints are useless with guys, they really don't get it. And its so irritatingly frustrating for men to be expected to guess and anticipate women's expectations.


Well-Known Member
When I say tell him your expectation, its about for future. Not past. That would be more complaining then telling him.

e.g. Tell him that you would very much hope and want him to accompany and celebrate your bday. Ask if he could arrange sometime earlier or after his trip. This what you should have told him and not quietly EXPECTING him to get you something or to call u. Sounding off each other in anticipation can be very effective in avoid unnecessary confusion and disappointments from wrong expectations. But, it should be used appropriately in moderation at the right moment. Else, it can also become an irritating 'disclaimer' that couples use to suan and spike each other instead.


New Member
Hey hotsnow,

Men are generally dense that way, i guess.

My bf and i were in BKK during my bday this year and when the clock struck twelve, i waited. One minute passed and nothing happpened. Two minutes passed, still nothing happened. Half and hour later, i punched him (he was right beside me, we were huddled under the comforter watching Transformers) and demanded, "Where is my surprise??" I thought he'd at least planned for a cake to be delivered to our room or something along that line.

Well, basically there was no surprise/ present in the end, not even a "Happy birthday, baby!!" and the trip was supposed to be my bday present.

I wasn't mad or anything. Just a lil disappointed, maybe.

My bf is one the BESTEST man in the whole wide world, tho he's not the most sensitive.

So i guess the moral of the story is- guys are just gundu that way. Haha.

Forgive your bf. Talk to him.


Well-Known Member
That's exactly the kind of waiting mind games ladies like...

"when the clock struck twelve, i waited. One minute passed and nothing happpened. Two minutes passed, still nothing happened."

But, men are from MARS. For him to better anticipate your needs, you gotta let him realize it. Align your thoughts ahead and not in reactive mode.


New Member
Sigh.. My guy is the ultimate "kayu". In fact, he's so kayu that he's possibly the most kayu man in the history of kayu men!

But it is also this kayu trait of his that makes him so adorable at times. *shakes head* Men- can't live with them, can't leave without them.

Hotsnow, so what's the latest? Everything resolved?


New Member
What I mean:
Point of no return = heart is dead.
Mutual attraction = both must still have attraction for each other. If just 1 party jus dun help.
Pointless to stay in this type of relationship (for me, I feel) unless its ok with you to live with that.
Fastest solution = i have seen many of my friends taking break up to get rid of the guy/ gal. (seems like shortest way)
Sure they have individual reasons but many times I felt they could have try / make more efforts.

I m sorry if I didnt use the right words but this is what i meant.

Regarding pranks, I felt that in relationship, there is no exact rules on how to communicate or keeps sparks alive blah blah.
Its about how comfortable you and him/her are.
To alot of ppl even my parents, they dropped their jaws when they see how me and him having a good time...reached 30s le still "playing like kids" " zhang bu da", small talk, giggling etc.
(Unlike my other sisters's bf, brother in law)
But they see that I am happier now than with my ex.
My inner world is alot more peaceful which is what i need.
Cos alot less quarrels, differences, we have more things in common ... i dun know what it calls .. "perception"? " same frequency"?
(I m sorry again if i use wrong words)

Well of course not all the time the same, if not I wont be curious and start this thread.
Gundu huh? lol!
Yap, I will tell him like what miLo says, what I want in future, next birthday,.....
He should be back to SG today.So when he calls.... I will tell him.

Again, hard to tell, he may not call.
I may be the one to break ice again by calling him first.
hmm... but I dun feel like breaking ice this time..


Well-Known Member
hotsnow, does he knows u r feeling tired taking the initiative everytime? Again, tell him.

On one hand, u r saying how wonderful u guys are and then, at the same time, saying how lay back he is. Frankly loh, he doesn't seem too enthusiastic over the relationship and you. If you are serious about continuing this relationship, then you need to realize and work with this lay back attitude of his. Fighting it isn't going to change anything.

" both must still have attraction for each other. If just 1 party jus dun help. "
well, even with mutual attractions and emotions, it doesn't resolve incompatibility issues. You can try all you want. But, if we loses ourselves, can we truly be happy?


Well-Known Member
I still don't understand your point about all the pranks. Basically, those are unique intimate stuffs in your relationship. But, it doesn't magnify or reduce the issues you have. Look at the issues as it is. If its bothering this much and its important, then, u need to work on it.

Bringing up on how much fun you can have with him doesn't change or mask the issues at all. The next time, he is going to be this insensitive again, u r going to get mad again. And he is going to do the siam action once more.

Another human reaction would be to siam difficult situations they don't know to handle. That's the reason why some guys just do the disappearing act when they sense the anger of their gfs. Ironically, this makes their gfs even angier. If he is confident in handling and calming you when u r upset, he would not be so stressed whenever you are angry. Its a vicious cycle. Somehow, both of u need to break out of it and gain some confidence and foundation in handling conflicts and differences than avoiding it.


New Member
if you really love him, you wil be able to accept minor short comings. No one if perfect, who knows maybe he is also thinking how come his darling is so particular abt birthdays? Only birthdays, every year also have, it is not that 'important' My hubby and I also don celebrate our birthday now..I used to be like you, always insist that he must celebrate my birthday, not with a bunch of ppl, just me.. ( very possessive, coming to think of it ).. But hubby told me , if someone really love you, he will not purposely choose a date to express his love for you, it all comes from the heart..will you rather want a ' show ' only on your birthday or a lifetime of 'truth from the heart' surprises? I understand thou ' girls like surprises,' just like my daughter of 6 years old, now already asking me what christmas present for her


New Member

Hey, I really do understand how you feel as when I was dating my current hubby, he was also like your boyfriend, absent-minded and keeps many things to himself. Correct me if I am wrong but I think in his case, he assumes that you do not mind/care if he makes no special mention of your birthday. He did not know that you are upset and did not understand your needs. I had the same experience as you and what I did was:

I told my now husband what I WOULD LOVE to expect. The key is to tell him and not bottle it up and end up second-guessing which can kill a relationship. I told him in a cute tone that it will be nice if he could make me feel extra loved that day, it could be a card or just a simple meal. The trick is never to demand, instead, ask nicely. I knew he was forgetful and sometime before my birthdays, I would say, “wei, my birthday coming you know..heheee..†I am like you, I want to feel pampered on special days and every now and then. In the many years that followed, my hubby know what a “small woman†I am and would surprise me without me having to say it anymore..

It is not a matter of “only getting after asking for it†or “really no face when have to ask†or “he should know by defaultâ€. It is a matter of different expectations. You are the type who like to celebrate events but your bf is does not. You need to communicate your needs to him and vice versa. Sometimes, you might end up taking the middle of the road approach. If he does not like to celebrate, don't force him but at least tell him: “darling, it would mean a lot to me if you had called me that dayâ€.

Hotsnow, I am sure your bf loves you, its just that guys are guys, a lot of things will appear insignificant to them. If you believe he is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, tell you how you would like to be loved (forget about the face issue) and if he treasures you enough, he will show some effort. And vice versa. That is going to the way to married life in future too. Communication of expectations to each other lovingly. Trust me, I have had these issues with my hubby before and through communication, forgiveness, patience and most importantly love, we overcome it and after 10 years of knowing him, the love grows stronger. I am sure you can do it one Hotsnow. If you cannot get over it yourself and still feel the unbalanced, tell him yah. Good luck .


New Member
I read another of your post thoroughly and that your bf believes that it is wrong to attempt to change someone. I totally agree but you can tell him that “darling, I am not trying to change you, I am just telling you that because you are the one I love, so your birthday wishes for me means a lot to me and it can really make my day.†Trust me, when he hears that, he will love you even more
And to get a guy to open up, very important, don’t assume things, don’t judge too much, show concern, and set aside time and place that is conducive for him to open up. It will take a long while for a guy of few words to open up but it can happen, with patience from you
It can even take a few years but what is a few years compared to thirty/forty years of happiness together hor?


New Member
"But, if we loses ourselves, can we truly be happy?"
I totally agreed, I lost myself before when with my ex which is why now I felt confused with this current one.

Yeah he "seem" not very enthusiastic over the relationship but I want to confirm this
Is he really not? or just "seem" only? was I somewhere wrong?
I DUN want to lose myself again in relationship again.
I always wanted to voice out in a sweet, tactful yet not forceful, and in his understanding level.

Rivernile has a nice, tactful one -
"....I am just telling you that because you are the one I love, so your birthday wishes for me means a lot to me and it can really make my day.â€
I going to use this when I meet him and see how is his reaction.

But I guess this is going to be good because he called to apologise when he reach SG this late morining.

Rivernile has very accurate analysis,
"...would surprise me without me having to say it anymore.."
He didnt just apologise, he surprised me by wanting to give me a christmas present on top of birthday present.

So fast changed to "auto gear" liao.

He dun really do X'mas presents exchange in the past hence I didnt get him one. hehe!
Now I become the one who is "insensitive", " absent - minded"?!
lol. I get a him X'mas present tommorrow!
I had a very busy day today...
Just reached home.


Well-Known Member
hotsnow, probably, he could be thinking of consolidating Bday and Xmas surprise together in the very 1st place. Hence, the intentional bo chap no action??

Next time, don't guess and get angry. Give each other some room and benefit of the doubt.

Enjoy your XMAS!


New Member
Wa piang!
Eh... MiLo, its not bo chap, if like that then he really kiam siap!

Then I would need all of your advices again.
New thread - "how to dig stingy bf/ hubby money?"

Thank you all for giving me valuable insights to love, relationship and all the advices!
Special thanks to MiLo, mrs Beast and rivernile. I learnt alot here.

Merry X'mas to all!


New Member

All the best to you and your boy boy k
I am sure one day, you will be a happy and lovely bride. Be happy and keep the communication open. Remember to "sai3 jiao2" more to him as it can grow intimacy, of course, since u feel he is the one, love him with all your heart too like now
Merry merry Christmas..


Well-Known Member
again, the same point. Why harping over a bday when one should really be looking at the relationship than dates.

"at least your bf will change to auto mode. Mine just conveniently forget my bday despite all the open hints". Such comparisons are really pointless.


New Member
Man are from Mars and Women from Venus.... When will we ever understand each other.... Aye, isn't this the reason why we are attracted to each other. Let them complaint, let them nag.... it is better to have some noise then to live in silence. And let us be that little bit of bo-chap, afterall if we are perfect, we wouldnt be here.