Indonesian Brides!!

[teatree]

buterfly,

thought the longest sale is in june or july? the great singapore sale? anyway, i think singapore's sale is almost year round. there are always things on sale at any point of time. heee...

don't know who else getting married from presby. heee.. except for you

anyway, did you parents go for rusmin's wedding?

canny,

hhm still got ample time to finish your engagement preps

are they going to be held in restaurants or hotels?

 

[canny]

Hey Teatree,

Yeah.. still have some time to finish. They are going to be held at clubs.

U wake up early hor?

 

[felicity]

gd mornin canny
hi.... ;p
tdy just mon.. long wk ahead. i suffering fm mon blues tdy..

 

[leeds]

Hi teatree,

A bit confused lah, there are so many celebrations before the actual day wedding in Indo! Yah now i remember, there's lamaran, then engagement party, then 7 days before wedding to exchange gifts, then the actual wedding itself. wahh really a long process ah. How many of these tradition did you have?

Butterfly, I work 9 to 6 normally, but a lot of overtime as usual. haha... i miss afternoon naps. You know indos really like to take naps in afternoon. My fiance thinks its really weird, he thinks only kids sleep in afternoon. hehe...

 

[felicity]

leeds
haha. me oso miss my afternoon nap. but then me lazy ma..
yr fiance is not fm indo?

 

[leeds]

Anna, he is but been in SG for long and now based in england. I think only ppl who live in indo got the luxury of taking naps lah. haha...

 

[teatree]

leeds,

haha... i have the whole nine yards. my parents are still quite traditional when it comes to wedding tradition. i like the gift exchange though hehe.... cos got a lot of gifts for me.

i love napping!! but nowadays can only do it on weekends

canny,

yeah the latest i can sleep to is 8. sigh... even on holidays i wake up very early.

how's your food tasting? food yum?

 

[canny]

Teatree,

Food tasting was good.

Veri yummmy. I think u are getting used to waking up early in the morning... ttz why. Sometimes, I am like tt too.

So sad hor. Wow... ur parents are veri traditional.... so many rules.

 

[canny]

Hi Anna,

Busy at work?

 

[felicity]

hi canny
yup. at wk but not so very busy tdy. suffering fm the monday slowness blues.

oh you went for food tasting... did you complain? hahha. heard some ppl criticise abt small things but they will fix it so must take chance criticise more. hahhaha.
what kind of food was it? western? chinese?

teatree
wah.. so nice. my parents not very trad. so i think i will get less in the gift exchange...what did you get?

 

[canny]

Hey Anna,

We are doing a more laid back engagement party in SF. Thus, going with a Mexican Feast.

Food was good. No complains. I like it alot. Maybe, the chef was using all organic produce to make the food. Eg, Ranch Free Chickens, organic veggies and etc.

When is ur wedding?

 

[teatree]

hi canny,

is the chef from the club? mexican food is good!! i like it a lot too.

all organic food, is that a coice or the club regularly uses all organic products?

anna,

actually hor, very traditional not so good. there were some clashes between my parents and my pils. pils are not that traditional, they wanted to skip a number of things.

ha.. i got to choose my own gifts, except the jewellery (wanted white gold but got yellow gold instead, that's why have never worn them). went home to indonesia to buy the rest.

here's what i got, roughly, cos i am pretty sure i forget some things:
from groom's side for bride's
jewellery
clothes (everyday, lingerie, working clothes, formal dresses or tops)
make up set (including perfume)
shoes, bags and wallets
whole suckling pig
cookies and cakes
sweets
fruits (my mom insisted on 5 kinds)
liquor
2 envelopes containing money (my parents will get the one with smaller amount and give back the one with larger amount of money)

what i gave to the groom's side
some gold jewellery
clothes, ties, pyjamas
shoes, belts, wallets
divide the fruits, cake, cookies, sweets into 2 and give them back to the groom's side

okie, hope that helps

 

[oneighthyear]

ohhayo teatree and butterfly,

still remember me? he he he I just finished my project so I was just surfing away and stumbled back into this forum

How are you guys? Butterfly getting married this year yah? All the best for everything!!!
Hi Indonesian brides, I was one of the 'original' Indonesian brides also he he he.

 

[leeds]

Teatree,

wah a lot of gifts ahh? i also want the full tradition actually, but how how my fiance is so westernised! I guess i'll miss out on the gifts lor.

Can ask did you buy 2weeks' worth of clothing for the first 2wks of your married life? hehe... Me trying to convince fiance to give me that.

Canny, mexican feast sounds so yummy!

wonder where can get good mexican food in SG ah?

 

[leeds]

teatree, i just read your list!! wahhhhhh thats a lot!! i also want. i think thats what my cousins did also. me so envious....

Btw, are those gifts delivered a few days before the wedding to bride's house or are they placed in your wedding room?

 

[felicity]

canny
i am looking at dec05 but date not confirmed yet.

teatree
wow! so much stuff. i will only be getting jewellery - in my case i get to choose ;p i think i will also get the sweets and cakes but tts all...
not hving so much tradition. i am trying to get my mum to buy me diamond earrings, sewing box and tea set...wish me luck when i try k?

hi oneeightyr!!

 

[canny]

Hey Leeds & Teatree,

The chef at the club uses only organic produce.

Yupyup... I like Mexican food alot... very very tasty.

I am sure there is a Mexican Restaurant in SG. U shld chck it out! Wow... u gals are so traditional. My mom told me that she had to do that when she got married 30 years ago. Little did I know people in Indo still believe in these traditions. But veri fun hor... at least get a whole closet of BRAND NEW clothes.

Anna,
Have u started looking for a venue yet? What abt bridal salons and etc...? Is ur wedding in Sg or indo?

 

[teatree]

hi hi gals,

oneightyear, glad that you found us here!!! wanna join some of us for an outing? it's on 20 May 04 at TOAST (ngee ann city), time to be confirmed, but it's surely after work

let me know if you want to join us okay?

anna, get to choose your own jewellery is good enough!

heee... at least you can choose what you like and can use them later on. have you parents agreed on white gold? you know lah, chinese don't like white gold.

*wishing you good luck*

leeds, the gifts were delivered to my house a few days before the wedding day. it's like a small party cos the bride's side must provide food for the groom's side. i don't know whether need to bring the gifts to the bridal room. for my case, it was really a hassle if the gifts were to be brought to the wedding room cos my wedding was in another city (lampung), so i didn't bring lor

hahaha.. you can persuade your fiance to give you 2 sets of everything. chinese don't like odd numbers

4 sets not good cos 4 means something bad in chinese.

 

[teatree]

canny,

that's why i insisted on buying the gifts myself. heeee.... so are you going to have such gift exchange? does your fiance's family still believe in the tradition?

leeds,

try holland v. there are 2 mexican restaurants, side by side. they are near NYDC cafe. i think one is called cha cha cha. forgot the name of the other one but remember the food at the other restaurant is more yummy!

 

[canny]

Hey Teatree,

Neither my parents nor in laws believe in such traditions... phew! Save me alot of hassle lar. However, my mother in law bout me a set of diamond jewelery... that she had asked me to pick out on my own in the states... hehehehee.

u at work now?

So nice.... a get together. I wish I can be in SG!

 

[teatree]

canny,

yeah yeah. having major tuesday blues

after my leave yesterday.

have you picked the jewellery set yet? so fun! me would love to pick my own set. right now the sets given to me are in indo with my mum.

when are you going to be in SG again? can arrange for another gathering when you're around. heee...

 

[canny]

Hey Teatree,

Have not picked my set yet. Maybe will do it closer to the wedding day lor. Cause, I might wan to go buy the set from SG.

Ya hor... u cannot wear those things out on the streets.... or else will kena rob. heheheee....

The next time I will be bac will be for my wedding in Dec.

Hahhaa... Tues blues.... I know I know... I just had my share of Mon blues. I can't wait for my honeymoon.

 

[teatree]

canny,

december huh? that's what i thought too. you'll be too busy to go for any gathering. after the wedding, you'll be too excited to go for your honeymoon. hehehe.. where are you planning to go?

sg not so bad lar. in indo, definitely will kena robbed! in fact just 2 days ago i saw a group of indon ladies decked in diamonds in taka. maybe they don't have a chance to wear in indo, that's why wear in sg.

 

[canny]

Teatree,

Initally, planning Maldives. But because of the the tight schedule we decided to do Phuket. Most prob Amanpuri Resort or Banyan Tree in Phuket. I am still finalizing the details. Where did u go for ur honeymoon?

Hahaha... I know. I have seen Indo woman stacking their fingers with bling bling and taking the New York subway! A bit too much lar. I am so scared that they will get robbed.

 

[teatree]

canny,

phuket ah? don't know about amanpuri but banyan tree should be good enough. all the spa will make you feel soooo relax after all the wedding prep stress.

i didn't go anywhere cos don't have time. will go this december. have made arrangements to go to santorini, greece. don't know whether still got the honeymoon feeling or not by december.

 

[leeds]

Hi teatree,

oooo you even get to buy the gifts yourself! My sis didnt get to choose, everything was decided beforehand but she cannot buy them herself. wah i think i really should ask fiance to exchange gifts with me. So exciting

Btw during this exchange, groom cannot come to bride's house right? only the family & representatives will bring those gifts to the house, am i right?

Yah i know cha cha cha, but like not very nice ah. I used to like fajitas so much when i was in london. yum yum... now craving for it...

Canny,

hahah.... i cant believe all these indo tantes even bring their huge rocks to travel to us!! They are really cute hor... all the huge hairdos, colourul silk print tops, and chunky jewelleries.... They dont even need to speak and we can tell from afar that they are from indo! haha...

 

[canny]

Hey Teatree,

Amanpuri is supposedly better than Banyan Tree. I dunno about that until my boss told me. She went to Bali and Phuket for her honeymoon and stayed in the Aman resorts. She told me that itz even better than the Ritz in Hawaii. So I am really looking forward lor.

Greek Islands are BEEAUTIFUL! But isn't Dec a little bit cold?

Leeds,
YA lor. I can recognize an Indo IBU from far. Just based on her hair-do and dress.

heheheheee..... so how's wedding preps? When is ur hubby coming back to SG?

 

[leeds]

Canny, Phuket sounds good... very relaxing after your hectic schedule in SG.

Teatree, of course there'll be a honeymoon feeling, you guys only just got married! Plus, travelling together, discovering new places together is always fun and exciting. I love travelling!! But i wont be having a honeymoon immediately after the wedding

no time to fit one in... Greece looks beautiful from the movies hor.... Definitely one of the places i want to visit next.

 

[leeds]

Canny, i havent heard of amanpuri also.... wah even better than ritz in hawaii?? must be really good hor... Any pics or website to share? I just want to kaypoh, maybe can drag fiance there in the future. hehe... My wedding preps have sort of stopped now, dont really have anything to do until my fiance comes back again lor. He's coming back in July! sigh still 3 months ah....

 

[teatree]

leeds,

luckily my in laws were not from jakarta and they were the ones who told me to get the things from jakarta. that time i wanted to buy from singapore but jakarta was definitely cheaper.

i think the groom can come to the bride's house. during lamaran cannot, but gift exchange can.

what does your fiance think about getting 2 weeks' worth of clothes?? haha... but you must reciprocate by buying him 2 weeks' worth of clothes to leh...

canny,

we have no other choice but to go in december since next year june or july is already booked for my cousin's wedding in aussie

. actually what you said is true lor, most of the hotels in santorini are open from may to october.

is amanpuri newer than banyan tree? honeymoon must really go and pamper ourselves. get first class for everything

 

[oneighthyear]

Hi all,

teatree I am not sure whether I will be in SG on 20th May cause I plan to go home for my mum's bday on the 25th but haven't confirmed yet. Will let you know nearer to the date ok?

hmmm I am surprised. I tot most chinese families would be strict on tradition. I myself am not chinese but my husband is, however his family is also not very traditional but I still ended up having the same stuff as teatree, and my MIL was nice enough to ask me whether I preferred white gold or yellow so I told her white and she bought me a whole set of white gold diamond jewelry. But of course during the tea ceremony I got yellow gold, guess inevitable. Oh and we shopped for our own clothes cause must be something we want to wear right. And we didn't use whole suckling pig but canned pork instead. My family found the gift exchange very interesting he he he, cause I am the only to have married a chinese so it was a new experience for them.

 

[teatree]

leeds,

when are you planning to go for your honeymoon? haha.. think by december the lovey dovey feeling would be gone liao! even now, i'm not so lovey dovey anymore. but maybe the feeling will come again when in greece lah. hopefully.

how long have you not seen your fiance?

 

[canny]

Hey Leeds,
Aman's web-site is http://www.amanresorts.com/ Chck it out lor! I am still on the wait list (Can u believe it?) for my reservations in Dec.

Hehhehe... I guess u must be really excited to see ur fiance huh? So are u moving to UK after ur wedding?

Teatree,
Hey.... Dec is cold leh. Not sure if u will be able to enjoy. However, there will def. be less tourists.

Oneeightyear,
ur MIL so nice! hehheheee.... so are u staying SG now?

 

[leeds]

Hi oneightyear,

Even within chinese families, there are many different traditions, sometimes its difficult to find a compromise when the 2 families believe in different things. wahh real headache to please all sometimes... But yours ran so smoothly ah. Your PILs so understanding...

 

[leeds]

teatree, ehh funny leh... during my cousins' preps, groom must come and lamar together with the family, and during gift exchange, he cannot appear. sigh... all this tradition is never-ending and really troublesome to follow all yah. we'll see we'll see... Btw, i'm telling my fiance that its the tradition in my family that the bride gets 2 wks' worth of clothes, just like my cousin, but for groom, only need basic necessaties like pyjamas, shaver, underwear, and a few clothes lah. hehe.... Hope he buys that!

The last time i saw him was in Feb lor, when he came back to SG to do all the wedding preps. so its long distance relationship most of the time!

Canny, yah i'm moving to england after the wedding!! Quite excited & a little scared abt it lah... Actually hoping to quit my job within the next few mths then can ROM and move there first lor. Are you planning to come back to SG or Indo at all in the near future?

 

[felicity]

canny
my wd will be in sg. will get some relatives to fly in. so relieved i dun hv to hold one in malaysia too cos fh bro had to hold one there.. i am thinking of silhouette and wedding present.. but i hv not done much due diligence as yet... cos still early din wan to go down to the bs so early..ppl here really book everything so early.. cannot keep up. haha.

leeds
ya agree tt indo idu easy to spot but i think the younger ones nowadays not so flashy anymore. less is more elegant dun you think so? otherwise like christmas tree...

one8yr
you not chinese? are you javanese?

teatree
ya i insist on white gold. dunno abt my granny tho. but fil and parents ok with it. granny coming fm indo this wkend. hopefully she ok too.. but i think i wun broach the subject for the moment...

 

[felicity]

leeds
wah you shortchanging him ah?
haha. gd to hv 2 wks clothes.. make sure you buy all evening gowns hahaha. cos regular wear not so ex ya?

 

[teatree]

leeds,

hahaha... i don't know lah. my in laws were quite adamant on not bringing my then fiance to the lamaran. i think as long as both sides of families agree then just don't care what others do. on the clothes thing, good luck trying to make him to buy that. just say most of the indon girls you met at this forum all bought 2 weeks' worth of clothes. hehe...

yeah yeah, must be quite difficult having long distance relationship. but fret not, soon you'll be re-united with him. heee...

. has he found a place over at leeds for the 2 of you?

 

[oneighthyear]

hi all,

oh yes for my case also my husband could not be seen at the gift exchange thingie, but of course he wanted to come cause got makan makan nasi tumpeng after that mah ah ha ha, so what he did is he hid in the car till all the formalities were done ha ha ha ha.

For us the lamaran was the engagement party, (3 years ago) so he had to be there lah cause give me the ring and pray together, oh i also got the necklace from my MIL , din know it means to tie you down ha haha ha

 

[teatree]

oneightyear,

okie... let me know nearer the date. anyway, are you bringing your wedding photos back to singapore? must let me see okay??

yup, i also saw your gift exchange photos. pretty much what i had also. that suckling pig hor, i heard, is optional. but if it's the bride's first marriage, then must bring some parts of a pig lor. hehehe... i was joking with my sisters, if it's the bride's 2nd or 3rd marriage, then maybe must bring a cow.

 

[teatree]

anna,

agree agree! must buy all evening gowns! hehehe....

can tell your grandma nearer the date and when the jewelries are bought. then cannot change anymore mah.

oneightyear,

i got different things from you! lamaran is just where the groom's family gave me a necklace. engagement was held on another day. that's when we exchanged rings. everyone is doing this wedding custom thing differently.

 

[leeds]

teatree,

haha... good idea! will tell him abt your gift list and i'll exaggerate a bit for sure!

hehe... me getting excited too abt the gifts! quite fun ah... And i really really love to eat suckling pig, its so so nice! Too bad its not something i can eat often, so i'm intending to ask for a huge one so can eat for many many days.

anna, then you'll see me wearing evening gowns at home everyday in the first 2weeks after i got married! haha... people will think i'm nuts!

 

[leeds]

teatree, yah thats what me and fiance been telling ourselves, only a few more months then we'll be together everyday until we are sick of each other!

I'm hoping to quit my job soon and i can go there before the wedding to buy a house together and settle down at the new place first before the wedding. He's currently only renting a place with his collegue lor.

 

[leeds]

oneightyear,

you got photos already?? Can share with me too? [email protected]

 

[teatree]

good morning ladies

leeds, hahaha... yeah must exaggerate then you'll get what you want. if you don't exaggerate, you'll get less then expected. that time, i had to cut out a magazine article for the gift list and showed my husband's family. they almost wanted to skip with that tradition cos they felt that it was too troublesome.

has your fiance started looking for a house yet? you're moving there quite soon leh. so nice... i'm so envious of you cos you don't need to work for at least until your wedding is over.

my suckling pig was divided amongst my relatives that came that day. and all of them so experienced, zoomed in for the skin which was the nicest part of the pig

.

 

[felicity]

hey gals
how much is a reasonable cost per carat of a loose stone ruby?
i am trying to presuade fh to get me one.
anyone can help me with this?

 

[leeds]

Good morning!

Teatree, lucky for you they didn't skip the tradition after all... Actually ah, what is the significance of gift exchange for the couple? My fiance has never had these types of tradition in his family and seem so reluctant to do them. I was thinking of doing without it, but now you all make me so tempted to have the gift exchange. It sounds like fun, I can do with some gifts to start my new life

plus we can never forget our roots and custom. right? hahaha.....

No my fiance is waiting for me to be there to choose a house together. I'm very particular abt my house and the decor etc, so he's gonna let me make the decisions lor.

Aiya actually its quite stressful when i think abt quitting you know, that means no income, cannot spend $$ so freely, no more independene leh... But i definitely will take a break from working life for a while till after my wedding lor. How abt you whats your plan after graduation??

BTW, today is wednesday. Its my GYM day!!!

How you free to join me?

 

[canny]

Hey Leeds,

Wow...so u quitting soon then? Hehhehee.... veri nice lor. My fiance and I plan to stay in SF for good lor unless there is a better opp. in Asia. We have been living here for close to 10 yrs already so are used to the lifestyle and the weather here.

I am sure u will enjoy UK. Esp. when most european countries are nearby.

Anna,
So which hotel or rest. will ur banquet be hosted? Have u decided on that yet? Seems to me that there are alot of Indos hosting their wedding in SG hor.

Teatree,
Good morning! Still at work?

 

[teatree]

canny,
good morning! not still at work, just started work in fact. at least got something to look forward to since today i'm going for steamboat with some friends. have decided not to take lunch. hehehe.... what a bleak prospect! how about you? going to have dinner soon?

leeds,
err.... i don't know the significance of the gift exchange, thought it was something like mas kawin. if i were to say that it's to prepare the bride and groom for a new life i'd only be half correct since now i remember my in-laws bought my parents some cloth and very basic necessities too. and i'm pretty sure my parents' life is not new anymore. but i guess you can tell your fiance that, to start a new life, need everything to be new as well. hehehe...

anna, can't help you with that. sorry

. do you intend to buy ruby?

 

[teatree]

leeds, have a taste of life as a lady of leisure for a while. when you get bored of not doing anything you can always find a job there. actually, you're right, not working = no money = no independence, everything must ask from husband.