I don't think he's interested in proposing

VirgoGirl

New Member
Hi

I've been seeing my BF for 2.5 yrs and we've spoken about marriage since the 1st year of courtship. i'm in my late 20s, he's 30.
In fact, during a bridal fair in 2011, we took up a bridal package coz it was a good deal.

He has also told his parents and family our plans in settling down.

That was sometime last year. His mum was ecstatic.
He's the only child.

Late last year, we went to look at engagement rings.
I'm very particular of the design & quality, so i made the arrangements with the jeweler myself (after consulting my BF) that we will come down to take a look.

After that, my BF didn't immediately purchased the ring.
I choose a cheaper version but really like the one with more facets..

About 1 week later, he went down to make a deposit for the ring.
He bought the more expensive and better quality diamond. (the one i liked)
I didn't know about this until i found the receipt in his wallet.. I didn't snooped around, it was
falling out of the wallet and i saw it.

collection date was 5 Jan 2013.

but he didn't go and collect until end Feb.

Then until today, he has kept the ring.. it's already mid May.

I personally think he has NO intentions to proposed.
Although he keeps saying he wants "the perfect time" and "alrdy has plans with his frds"
We have also put a deposit for our banquet next year March.
I don't know what he's waiting for..

I also told him, i won't wait for him.
To me, if its important to him, he won't wait for so long.
There's no important dates coming up too.

About 2 yrs ago, i suggested to be a cabin crew.. but he wouldn't let me citing reasons that we have so many plans together and getting married so if i'm flying around it'd be hard.
I decided to let go of that thought and solely focus on saving for the wedding and house.

I don't know what else he wants.
We've booked a house, ready in 2016, our banquet booked in March 2014, bridal package, checked.
We are already half-way there and YET he's not making the 1st move.

I'm so sick and tired of waiting for him to be a man and ask for my hand.. until i've sent out my resumes to 2 airlines w/o his knowledge.
 


anirdnas

New Member
Don't think it that way. Probably he is waiting for a special moment to pop the question to you?

My HTB bought the ring in June. Proposed in Dec.
 

momoftwo

Member
He will propose to you lah... on wedding day lor. Maybe after you get the keys to the flat leh..Possibly after the baby is born lor...
Aiyo.. you so desperate to get married meh.. before he proposed , you already said yes liao... so embarrassing !!
Yes to wedding package.. yes to HDB... haiz... no wonder he is in no rush to propose to you.

Want to be cabin crew.. go and be cabin crew .. live your life.. stop waiting for him.
You stop there, gong gong waiting.... why would he need to chase after you ?
 

whitening

New Member
Hi babe. I had the same problem with you before. And when he proposed for the first time after me waiting for more than 6months I failed him coz it was done so simply it cnt b accepted. Every lady wants their unforgettable once in their lifetime proposal be as fairytale liked as possible. Sadly most men nv can understand that. End up he did give me a sweet proposal. Simple one but at least sweet enough based on his character.

I just need to prepare you for something as I've been married till now, lesser than a year, marriage is definitely not as fairytale liked as we thought it is. It can be beautiful but seeing how you feel and what you did I believe in some way our thinking is quite alike n our man will always think that no matter wgat they do its nv enough for us n true enough they might had done everything to them but there will always be that something or some things that we keep pin pointing n hold on to it so bitterly they will nv b able to solve nor understand.

Nonetheless I really hope that he has a huge surprise installed for you like what I hoped or thought I would had got.

I hope that for you babe.
 

ioyces

New Member
Yeah..he's already purchased the ring so I don't have any doubt that he's going to propose...some guys are really much more thoughtful and slow to act (my boyfriend for one!!)... I would only worry if he hasn't bought the ring...(and he bought the more expensive one!) hope that you guys have the chance to communicate clearly and he will come up with a very meaningful proposal.. :)
 

klaz

Member
chill babe, at least he has gotten the ring~!

i wasnt expecting any from mine as we're alr staying together... but he had his own plans all along... and it came as a surprise for me which made me real touch! furthermore, he didnt buy the ring until after the proposal as i said before i wanted to choose a design which i like! its was only when we went shopping for the ring then i actually knew from the sales staff that he came to enquire before hand and did his homework on the rings...

same like u, im in my late 20s while bf late 30s.. been together for 3 years plus.
 

xellos

Member
Sounds like you are just being paranoid. Would you rather he NOT plan it and just propose on a regular dinner place? or would you rather wait for a big surprise? My brother purchase the ring for gf and waited half a year later before he propose as planning one is NOT EASY AT ALL he just want to give the best to the gf. Cheers!
 

espenine

Member
Chill out babe. If the proposal really mattered that much at all and you deem it as the ultimate, why did you choose to plan & buy your flat & ring even before he proposed? Aren't you placing the cart before the horse? Or have you pressured him into buying flat & ring first? If you think you have sacrificed a lot by choosing not to be a cabin crew, think about the decisions that you have to make in future as a couple, which will involve various levels of sacrifices. Mature your thinking and trust your man.
 

lindylim

New Member
Sometimes I think it's the matter of time.

Dun worry so much n wait for the surprise. Look out for ur bday, anniversary date or any special dates for the both of u.

My HTB proposal to me 3 days before my bday n on a public holiday as need to make sure my frds r available that day to witness this special day of us.
 

miloice

Well-Known Member
I bought the proposal ring secretly in the 1st year of relationship and only propose more than a year later. Eventually tying the knot after another 2 years. The element of surprise isn't there since you were involved in the selection and purchase. You are one impatient lady, you guys have signed up for the banquet, wedding packages, housing and yet you are still expecting and demanding. The proposal loses its meaning when it is rush and forced. You have already communicated on your needs, give him some space and trust in the relationship. If you are so jumpy over just the proposal, be prepared for many more things in life together that will not go exactly how you demand for.
 

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