Husband affair, need opinions and views please

soisuka

New Member
Yes and you two grown men are so healthy... Sm has been here since 2006, powder 2004.... Seriously you don't have anything better to do than talk about love and marriage??! Come on, at least I can admit I'm here because I'm addicted to the forum for some stupid reasons. You want me to believe you are really here to help people??! Give me a break....

Moderators please ban my IP!!!!!
 


powder

Active Member
your world is pretty small and sad...

with your current mindset, u might be ill-advised to be advising on anything. u will only cause problems... and seeing that u are addicted, i guess u just wanna say something and be part of the groupie...

this is precisely the problem with some forummers here.

2004 and 2006 are registry dates... it doesn't signify anything, but it tells me that u have very little u can say or refute, thus u try to hit on a registry date. it's very sad when pple go into that... it is no different from pple talking abt 'regulars' and 'seniors'.

those who say it, care for such 'statuses' more than they'd care to admit.

i do more in a given minute, than most pple do in an hour. so dun use your time-management to determine how much of time pple actually spend.

surprised u need moderators to ban u, when u can simply stop yourself. just remove the link, unsubscribe and u're done.
 

simpleman

Active Member
soisuka,

Why also drag me into the picture?

I was here in early 2005 and re-register in 2006 - just for your info.

And you were asking why I am here? There is no particular reason - has been here on/off for a couple of years - just a matter of habit of checking on/off.

Of course I have many things to do.. but it does not hurt to spend some minutes here while in between things I am doing. I don't pretend to think that I am helping people but I do think I can offer a certain perspective.. whether it helps people or not - I don't know.

If you are addicted, then that is your problem. So you are thinking that somehow there must me something wrong with us (or me) for coming here to talk about love and marriage?

And please if you want to engage powder, engage him. If you want to engage me, then engage me.. I am not powder and don't lump us together...
 

lovetigerbb

New Member
Hi Joyce,

After reading to your post, i feel that you are looking down on your hubby since the very initial stage.
You feel that he is a Malaysian, who has lower status than you and so as his family members, right?

Well, i need to remind you.. Generally guys are ego creature. They need their wife to respect him especially in front of their family members and friends! But from what i read in your post, you seem like never give face to your hubby in front of others.

I feel that you are very proud of being an educated spore woman.. But you know among my single male friends, 90% of the guys wish their wife is Malaysian..u know y? Because generally they feel Malaysian girl is more gentle, caring and understanding! It clearly shows that guy doesnt need a wife who is highly educated, who can earn a lot..but they just need a wife who is gentle and caring! I remembered one of my manager told me..guy actually very very simple. they just hope when they reach home after working for long hours, their wife can wait for them with smiling face with a bowl of hot soup. Then he will be very very satisfy. He also told me that if the wife able to do that, the man will know no matter how pretty outside girl are, he will always know his wife still the best.

You mentioned that you don't like to cook and like to eat outside. I'm same with you too. Before dating with my hubby, i hate to cook and enter kitchen too! But since i start dating with him, i learnt to fried egg, cook veges, try to borrow recipe to improve my cooking skill etc. I feel that it is my responsibility to take care his diet. sometimes guy also need ppl to pamper them.

Please don't try to influence by your mom too much. Judge yourself whether this marriage is worth for you to work out or not. Don't listen too much from your mom.

Since now you already have 2 kids, divorce is not the best solution as it not only involves you and your hubby, but also another 2 innocent kids. I will suggest you both to seek for marriage counselling. At the same time, you should also try to control your temper. Try to love his family as your own. Hope you both will patch up soon!
 

powder

Active Member
Soisuka,

the subconscious mind is very powerful... u can lie to it, as much as it can lie to u... if u feed it negatives... u end up lying to yourself abt life and that Becomes your reality.

since u wonder why i can be in this forum for so long... i shall tell u that it is not to talk abt love and marriage. if u ever have time to go thru even 10% of my posts... u will realise that 90% of them is abt conquering ourselves, our mindset, our thought processes. i have particularly strong interest in threads which involve financial woes, as well as career. and again 90% of them addresses the fundamental root of the problems - The Mind.

as with others in the past, i'm gonna attempt to help u uncover the facade that u have lied to your subconscious abt, and thus your subconscious has been lying to u abt....

let's start with the simplest one first... u said "at least I can admit I'm here because I'm addicted to the forum for some stupid reasons. You want me to believe you are really here to help people??! Give me a break"
- this comes from your inability to believe the goodness in pple, and becos u do not believe, u go The Other Way... u believe in the Negatives instead... and u act that way becos u have Lied to yourself that everyone is like that, thus it is a root characteristic... and thus - u can be like that becos everyone else is.

that is a lie u have told your subconscious, and in turn... it is telling u without u even having to think abt it. that is how powerful it is, and how it can make it your second nature.

same goes with "We are all selfish let's not pretend that we are not."
- when u choose to be black and u paint the world black... it doesn't mean the world is black. it means u painted it black so that u dun want to worry abt how hard it is to be white. U choose to think everyone is selfish so that u can get by your conscience daily When u choose to be selfish. it has Nothing to do with being human, it has everything to do with You choosing to be so.

this is not meant to be an argument nor rebuttal, it is meant to unmask the black, and allow the white to appear. u choose how u wanna see it, and be wary that your Mind is more powerful than u think... perhaps it is controlling the way u see things.

i Am becos i Am.... not becos i need to be....
 

strawberry_love

New Member
"I feel that you are very proud of being an educated spore woman.. But you know among my single male friends, 90% of the guys wish their wife is Malaysian..u know y? Because generally they feel Malaysian girl is more gentle, caring and understanding! It clearly shows that guy doesnt need a wife who is highly educated, who can earn a lot..but they just need a wife who is gentle and caring! I remembered one of my manager told me..guy actually very very simple. they just hope when they reach home after working for long hours, their wife can wait for them with smiling face with a bowl of hot soup. Then he will be very very satisfy. He also told me that if the wife able to do that, the man will know no matter how pretty outside girl are, he will always know his wife still the best."

Not really in some cases...What i heard from my male friend is marrying malaysian is better to be single. He claim at first b4 marriage, the malaysian wife appeared to be simple-minded & homely but after marrige, their true colors show. The wife is lazy, doesn't want to go out & work, let the husband take up all the burdens, my friend paid everything. The wife insisted the huband must give her money every month to buy new clothes mounting to $600 each month and ask for branded bags. There r times when my friend is tight in fiance, & his wife will make hell for him, findinf faults to quarrel with him just bcos she doesn't get her monthly clothes. Of coz, there r other good malaysian wives ard, my friend is one of the unlucky ones. Educated Singaporean women are more independent, some earn alot thou many can lead a comfortable life with their salary, therefore they can buy what they want with their earnings, & help to ease their husbands' burden instead of fully depending on their husbands.
 

strawberry_love

New Member
Joyce,

Respect is one of the ingredients towards a sucessful relationship. Since you don't have it for your husband & depise him from the very beginning, it will be better if both go your own ways as it won't be fruitful, both won't be happy in the long run.

You must really curb your unreasonable temper shld u found another man in future. No guys would like a princessy-attitude character to be their life partner. All the best & wish u hv a smooth divorce proceedings.
 

denise80

Active Member
Yeah..just feel that whether a woman is financially dependent or independent, there ought to be mutual respect between a couple.

Tan, the part about the wife waiting at home with a smiling face and a bowl of hot soup in their hands when the hubby returns home is a rather narrow view that is painted. I'm sure we know many of the women out there who do the same and what happened? Many became 'yellow face wives' and husbands decided to stray because all the wives, who are jobless, could talk about are household chores, tv programmes and kids.

I feel it still boils down to mutual respect and for a marriage to grow, both parties must also continue to grow as individuals (as much as together), pursuing their own hobbies, dreams and goals.
 

scopefun

New Member
Denise80,

Men stray not because of 'yellow face'.

You like the computer game very much... but once a new game is affordable, what do you think?

It doesn't even matter if you still like playing the old game...
 

joyce25

New Member
Thanks everybody. I am very sure I want to move on, like what u all say, I don't have it for him, and we will be happier and better if we go our own ways. And self reflection. Thanks.
happy.gif
 

susanna_low

New Member
A smart woman is someone who can be 大女人 to think n discuss on big decisions while be å°å¥³äºº at the right situations. Of coz it will be better to 出的了厅堂, 进的了厨房。

Able to maintain harmony at home yet not to over rely on hb. I simply can't stand friends who call hb to decide on minor issues.

If after u done your best n he's still go after the SYT, it's time to kick him out to the outer space.
 

susanna_low

New Member
haha i jus wan to reply to ur previous post saying u r lucky to marry a hb who can cook with a sense of humour! My hb's cooking sucks!
 

denise80

Active Member
No need to envy! All men have their strengths and flaws!
happy.gif
Ya he has a sense of humour and can cook better than me!
 

susanna_low

New Member
haha yeah n agreed on the "yellow face wives" part too. Though it's a bonus to create a cozy happy home for the hb to return to, harmony environment for the kids, it is also very important for the wives to be independent instead of revolving their life n rely 100% financially on the hb or anybody.

Hb is part but not everything. With or without them, life still goes on.
 

soisuka

New Member
To Powder: Nice try...but no

Since you like profiling people, how about you try to profile the men in these cases? Why trivialize their part in the failure of all these relationships? Takes 2 to clap, no? Instead of trying to figure out a woman, how about u try to help the woman figure out the men...if u are a man that is. I think most women here will find that far more insightful than hearing what you think about them..... Oh wait is that not a manly thing to do? Would that be considered betraying your brothers?

Why is this thread is starting to sound kinda 'propaganda-ish'.......
 

powder

Active Member
HUH? u are starting to be lame and argue out of your ass...

Since you like profiling people - HUH?

how about you try to profile the men in these cases? - FOR WHAT? it's long gone and the relationship can't work. she can't work, he can't work. it's a horrid match. talking abt it is for some of u... not for me. i make a call and move on.

Why trivialize their part in the failure of all these relationships? - HUH? wat talking u? why not u post another 20times talking abt her how bad her husband is... and U TELL ME if u have helped her move on, or u are simply prolonging the whole thing and encouraging her to talk more abt the same thing?

Takes 2 to clap, no?- HUH? clap wat? it's time she move on, why need TWO pple? HUH?

Instead of trying to figure out a woman, how about u try to help the woman figure out the men... - HUH? this thread doesn't need this At All. the husband had TOW and furthermore, he is a malaysian from a small island.

if u are a man that is. - HUH? this is your emotions speaking.

I think most women here will find that far more insightful than hearing what you think about them..... - NO, this is your job and what u do. most of u like to talk n talk in circles, why should i join u?

Oh wait is that not a manly thing to do? Would that be considered betraying your brothers? - WHAT NONSENSE IS THIS?

u are One Dumb woman. she needs to move on and that is all that matters. i have no idea why u wanna keep pulling pple back to walk into the same circle when they can simply get out. had u had the ability to realise What is More Impt in Life... Living It, or living in the past.

u won't find happiness in life. u will just talk abt finding it. u Will cause more damage than good.
 

powder

Active Member
Seriously, some of u are far more stupid than u give yourself credit for.

it's not so difficult to look at your life, your relationships, your frenships, your career, your bank account, your assets, your personality, your family....

and gauge how effective your mental ability really is.

u're no different from Scope trying to sound smooth on one hand yet starting the STD thread.
 

soisuka

New Member
*scratch head* er....more personality attacks? Powder kor kor is being mean! *sobs*

2 posts!!! WAH I feel so important.....You're the best *mmmmwaaah*
 

scopefun

New Member
Powder,

What's wrong to be worried of STDs?

I want the women, I don't want STDs. Nothing wrong. Ain't you a bit ridiculous? LOL~
 

miloice

Well-Known Member
"*scratch head* er....more personality attacks?"

your post on April 28, 2012 - 9:08 pm really makes me scratch head. What on earth?!?
 

soisuka

New Member
Thats in response to powder's long post april 28, 541am, about me earlier. Nothing to do with you milo.

Oh wait what is he doin here at 541am?!
 

powder

Active Member
u wish u had a personality that i could attack...

your post at 9.08 is so stoopid i dun even know if u have any idea what's going on.

that's precisely your problem... just becos u are selfish, u proclaim everyone is. and just becos u sleep at a certain time, u expect others to follow suit.

i dun think the world is dumb simply becos u are...
 

powder

Active Member
scope,

that is a moot post. basically u're toking cok. even a doc wouldn't know if he was in your shoes... and u are asking in a forum.

u have been screwing for so long and only now u post in the forum... says alot doesn't it?
 

tomasulu

Member
I thought Zodiac signs are ridiculous because it assumes 12 personalities and 12 outcomes. And that is until I meet people who presume that just because folks are from the same country they share common virtues. Absolutely retarded.
 

scopefun

New Member
Powder,

And that's your problem? Are you out of your mind?

I was worried. Nothing wrong worrying.

Something is seriously wrong with you.

What's your point?
 

60secs

Member
Mom's Chocolate Cake recipe:

Ingredients:
2 cups white sugar
1/2 cup shortening
2 eggs
3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 cup milk
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup hot, brewed coffee
2 teaspoons baking soda
2 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

Directions:
1.Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour one 9x13 inch baking pan.

2.Cream the sugar and shortening together until light and fluffy. Add the eggs and mix well. Stir in the cocoa, milk, flour, baking powder, boiling coffee, baking soda and vanilla extract. Mix until just combined. Pour the batter into the prepared pan.

3.Bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 30 to 35 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the cake comes out clean.
 

powder

Active Member
i do have a problem with stupidity.

u meet a stranger, kiss her, suck her nipples, And When u get a sore throat and u Fear u might get STD.... WTF?!??

and u wanna get her to do a test before the NEXT Date, Before having sex.

the women around u must really worship your cock and have double-digit IQs. when they are young, they are probably told that their life will revolve around being sex objects and servicing men. certainly it would not be flattering that u find denise an easy target.

in future when fixing up a date, just start at an orchard road clinic, tell the girl u're having a medical and if she doesn't mind, why not meet u there... then when she comes tell her u're getting tested for STD, HIV etc and offer to pay for her to do with u since she's there.

why orchard road is becos u can always check into the hotel after that and start sucking nipples and bonking.

and u wonder why u dun get to meet the really solid women....

u're just another pervert.
 

scopefun

New Member
Yawnz...

You are talking rubbish.

When will you grow up?

Tell you again, there is nothing wrong to have phobia with STDs... There is nothing stupid either.

Denise80 is not about easy target. She's worth a try IF she is not ugly. LOL~ When have I said she is an easy target?

You are so unromantic...
 

miloice

Well-Known Member
As stupid as it is... He can talk rubbish and yet there are still people that still actively respond to his obvious trash thread.
 

powder

Active Member
shucks...

sure sure, no wrong having phobia.

it's indeed intelligent to have fear of STD and act on the contrary.
 

strawberry_love

New Member
Denise,

"Yeah..just feel that whether a woman is financially dependent or independent, there ought to be mutual respect between a couple."

Yeah.

"Tan, the part about the wife waiting at home with a smiling face and a bowl of hot soup in their hands when the hubby returns home is a rather narrow view that is painted. I'm sure we know many of the women out there who do the same and what happened? Many became 'yellow face wives' and husbands decided to stray because all the wives, who are jobless, could talk about are household chores, tv programmes and kids."

Can't imagine in this century still got people paint such simple-minded & naive thots. Living in expensive Singapore, we are already so stress to keep up with the current economy. Everyone is looking to make more money. Where got the mood & energy to come home to cook, smile & serve the hubbies everyday? Same as we can't expect our hubbies to pamper us everyday. As long as both hearts stay united, no amount of temptations can break up the relationship.
 

strawberry_love

New Member
Tingyi,

"A smart woman is someone who can be 大女人 to think n discuss on big decisions while be å°å¥³äºº at the right situations."

100% so agreed.
 

60secs

Member
Mengele also sought out pregnant women, on whom he would perform vivisections before sending them to the gas chambers.

Auschwitz prisoner Alex Dekel has said: "I have never accepted the fact that Mengele himself believed he was doing serious work – not from the slipshod way he went about it. He was only exercising his power. Mengele ran a butcher shop – major surgeries were performed without anaesthesia. Once, I witnessed a stomach operation – Mengele was removing pieces from the stomach, but without any anaesthetic. Another time, it was a heart that was removed, again without anaesthesia. It was horrifying. Mengele was a doctor who became mad because of the power he was given. Nobody ever questioned him – why did this one die? Why did that one perish? The patients did not count. He professed to do what he did in the name of science, but it was a madness on his part."
 

Top