How will you react when you see your ex?

[sgbabydoll]

I am joining one of my ex-es and his colleagues for happy hour next week. Networking mah.

 

[dimpxtt]

so funny
tat day after gym..
wif e shiak look..
saw his bro again

he is talking to his frend..i guess he saw me
but when i walk pass him..hes talking to his frend..

let it be..
singapore is indeed very small..
the timing,the place and the awkareness ahahah

 

[bedokboy]

just saw mine, one day after her birthday.
wish her happy birthday, shake hand (so funny).

overall still ok lah.

 

[daemonkoh]

not bad ah u. Gracious of you to wish her and handshake.

 

[dimpxtt]

very fake or not huh?

 

[miloice]

why must it be fake? Cannot greet a friend happy bday meh? like this also so much to think about meh?

 

[bedokboy]

yo miloice!

no lah bluemoon and dimpxtt, mine was 5 years ago. no hard feelings.

but upon hindsight thot the handshake abit weird. Nvm lah.

 

[infojunkie]

aiyah panda, no grudges mah.

 

[denise80]

Funny thing is...even if I'm the one who's being dumped, I don't see a problem remaining as friends or say hi when I see my ex again. Some of my ex bfs are the ones who can't face me again?

 

[dimpxtt]

individuals have their own reaction methods.

frankly speaking i also dun noe hw will i react when i bumped into ex.

perhaps give a bochup face
perhaps give a sour chuck
perhaps heart will sour too
maybe depends on the type of mood tat time

beats me..

 

[lingzicy]

i saw my ex few yrs ago... act' oso nt prepared .. kana dumped few yrs back.. worse.. its 2gather twice... gt patched after 1st break.. when i saw him, i oso duno hw to react but is lk he oso saw mi, i cant possibly wlk off bah.. so juz smile looo.. then wlk off.. no contact le la.. i find it hard to contact wif ex..

 

[cococherry]

We lost touch for few years and I received a letter from him and since then we manage to keep in contact till now, that's my 1st bf.. hehe

 

[dimpxtt]

coco,

your ex so sweet ah
he regrets his action for parting wif u?

tats gd

 

[cococherry]

Panda,

He said he tried means to get in touch with me, call my old residential no, hp and go to my working place to look for me but still can't find me so he wrote me a letter lor. Not about regretting anything.

 

[mushigen]

coco, I suppose he still has feelings for you. Or worse, he thinks he still has hope of reconciling with you?

Seriously, I find bumping into an ex much more awkward than bumping into my father in a vice den in Geylang.

 

[dimpxtt]

haahha
steven u so funny..


y awkward eh?

 

[cococherry]

haha Steven, my first bf is a big flirt, I won't think too much when I receive the letter.

your ex sound like yr nightmare..

 

[dimpxtt]

side track a bit.

i clearing my wardrobe.

http://www.singaporebrides.com/forumboard/messages/194/1426864.html?1274245604

feel free to let me know if you are interested

heee..

 

[mushigen]

dimpxtt: Awkward because we have seen each other naked? She has become a stranger whom I know intimately (yeah, very cheem).

coco: I think most men will try to avoid their exes if possible - unless they (the men) still have feelings for the girl and hope to reconcile. It is also very awkward to meet the girl's new bf as both he and I know that we share the same pot of honey - so to speak

 

[dimpxtt]

steven,

y u guys are laughing that your ex 's new bf is wearing your old shoes huh..

 

[mushigen]

dimpxtt: Not laughing, no. I suppose you could say it has a little to do with "old shoes". I will never feel comfortable meeting the ex-bf of my gf in her presence, so I suppose the feeling is the same as far as the new bf of my ex is concerned.

Super duper awkward.

 

[dimpxtt]

ya...awkward feelings

smile also fake..
talk also fake

just nod n pass by
acquaintance

 

[mushigen]

At least you still try to nod. For me, I'll scan the horizon when I'm at a place she's likely to be present, and if I see her I'll pretend not to see.

 

[dimpxtt]

steven,

singapore not big lah

cant scan horizon and avoid..

for wat.
whats there to siam.
raise up your head n walk straight....

 

[mushigen]

dimpxtt: the problem is because Singapore in not big. I avoid them because I love them, care a lot about them, and hate them to the core.

 

[strawberry_love]

For me, i won't purposely avoid, just be natural..

 

[joiedevivre]

the past is past. don't hold on it. after all, both of you did love each other once.

for me i will also look out for my ex if i am at a place that we used to go to together. a bit nervous also, but i will def smile at him, rather than avoid him. unless he is with another girl, then better not to interrupt.

what is more awkward is meeting my ex's parents... don't know whether to smile or not. i hope i nv meet them.

 

[dimpxtt]

joiedveire.
if he is wif another gal..will u smile at him too?

 

[skycloud]

i think i won't wish to bump in my ex anymore. haha..he was my ex-colleague and his new gf also his current colleague who i noe..but ..everything is over..once impt, but no longer important.

 

[joiedevivre]

dimpxtt,

maybe not lah.

 

[dimpxtt]

joiedevivre..
tats y..no need to smile


funny to see ex loh
i also tik so

 

[niwota]

If we break up on a neutral term, I guess I will still talk to him.

Else, it will be quite awkward right? Lols.

 

[amulet]

i think most prob i will act like i didn't see him..

it's quite scary as we had broke up due to my pregnancy and he had threaten that if i am to ask for a single cent from him, he will fight for the baby.. even if he won't be granted the custody, he will also make the government remove my baby from me..

although this was 3 yrs ago and now i know he was just talking bullsh*t and not legally possible.. but still, some kind of fear and anger still lingers in my heart..

so ya.. i hope i would nvr bump into him face to face.. or at least, not wen i'm alone or with my daughter..

 

[dimpxtt]

recently whilst surfing my facebk..
on the right column got those random frends to add.

so conicidentally i see his name w no profile pic(kinda of shock too)..and click on his status shows married..

hmmmm..withins 2years get married..indeed fast sia.

but i didnt add him as frend..

 

[rubbishcow]

occassionally i still chat with my ex.. of course its like 2 years later after we broke up... last year i attended his wedding which the invite was sent by his wife la...

kinda complicated.. he cheated on me with a close ex-colleague and now they are married.. back then the woman knew I loved him alot an ya.. they are still together and he chose to break up with me..

no hard feelings towards the couple.. I had forgiven the man even though he think that I shouldn't have forgiven him.. gave him my heartfelt blessings during his wedding.. It only seems like he is a little awkward to see me.. coz he don't even dare to look at me and not to say talk to me during the wedding..

He is not the first ex who I am able to chat with.. There's still another one who I even club with once.. with a group of friends and my fiance knew about it.. so i think its up to each individual on how you wana see things and let go of it..

 

[miloice]

cow cow, good for you to have moved on!

 

[rubbishcow]

Thanks Milo!

Actually sometimes it is quite sad when I see friends who couldn't get out of a broken hearted relationship even after years.. they continue to dwell in the past and forget about how the world can be so much better...

 

[dimpxtt]

coz they 'wake up' and think they love themselves more now......
$$ is more impt than love now...

 

[starrynite78]

I saw my ex pics in FB, can still feel the pain & the love we had once... :-(

 

[jojo28]

I have supper with my ex yesterday after a year of break up.. and then, he also come and fetch me after school. quite strange. One year ago, we were quarreling like hell, and one year now, we take as nothing happened, and become netural friends

 

[miloice]

why strange? You expect people to carry one yr old fight with them? Do you do that?

 

[powder]

this kind of thread can only be started by... sometimes i wonder why there is a need to know how each other react, or if we should react at all... we should be wishing each other well in life, and if we do meet - becos we Actually agreed to meet... then it should be pretty "old fren" level rite?

maybe some pple get a kick out of others pining for them or something... being unforgotten.

 

[bedokboy]

it's a bit of a conundrum for many lah. I don't get it (understand) all the time too.

Sometimes, you may wonder, if you are able to think back on the past relationship without bitterness, anger, resentment or sadness, you wonder if you really loved the person or not. And if you didn't then when will you ever love someone as strongly as you see others do.

so....

hmm...

 

[simpleman]

bedoyboy,

I think how deep we love has nothing to do with whether we will feel bitter or angry when the relationship is gone.

Disappointment yes. Sadness yes, for a while. But emotions like bitter, anger, resentment = they do not equate to the amount of love we had previously.

While we are in love.. and I don't think how we can measure the strength of it.. what is the ultimate test? Willing to die for the person you love?

But once the love is gone, everything should be gone. It is about the ability to let go of something that has no consequences.

 

[simpleman]

I meet my ex-wife very frequently.. ok mainly because of the children.. but I do join her and her family for lunch / dinner and many other occasions.

We are divorced but we still have 2 joint accounts. She has the combination to my safe. We will part of our assets to each other and to the children.

We are still each other beneficiary for the CPF account.

 

[bedokboy]

yes sm. I meant all the different feelings collectively actually. If you break it down then some are really unnecessary. But disappointment and sadness, if it should still remain, is really very subjective.

If there is still a hint of it, does it mean you have not let go?

If there isn't a shred of it, does it mean you never loved him/her that much in the first place?

I still do love my ex of 8 years but more in a way where I hope she finds her happiness and a man who can take care of her well, amongst other things she may hope for in a man and in her life.

There is no disappointment, bitterness, resentment whatsoever. Sadness, maybe just a teeeeeensy weeeeeeeensy bit if I happen to drive past her place or somehow am led to think of her, which is very very infrequent and random nowadays.

I do however feel that, such a 'love' from afar concept is really quite noble to behold and I am indeed quite proud of myself that I am capable of it. Please note this is not the psycho type of 'love from afar' where you cannot possess the person but are still very keen on the happenings of the person ah? haha.

So if can practise this 'love from afar' concept on the next one would be good. This does not mean the next one will not see me for weeks and then I come back from partying still profess my love for her. More that I should love her and not possess her.

But still think I don't totally get it lah.

 

[simpleman]

Oh.. the disappointment and sadness is at the point in time.. but 100% gone liao.. And that is why already let go.

I am not the type to look back.. yes, if look back only on the good things..

Not a shred just means you are able to let go.. does not mean how much the love is in the first place.

Hmm. I never love from afar.. Either love or no love..

Why so difficult.. love from afar?

 

[laundry_woes]

Hint or no hint, loved or not, does it matter anymore? They are but memories from the past. I can't say I din feel anything when I had some recent updates, but the feeling's mild and I got over it pretty fast. It's been years. Feels like I no longer know the ex since we have both moved on. I dun love anymore, but I wish him well.

Hi Peeps! Taking a kit kat break.

 

[powder]

wah i thought u disappeared into lala land liao....

all these looking back is more meant to re-affirm who we are and how we got here... i dun believe there's still pple out there looking to point fingers or blame pple for whatever they wanna blame for... and it's a freakin relationship that we know risk of breakup is there.

 

[laundry_woes]

Wat lala land? I've been lurking around. More fun to stalk u. Besides, imbecilic me cannot handle Socially Challenged Oafs Paralysed by English. It's not him, it's me.

Yeap, thanks for waking me up to the fact tat I think too much. To the point of hallucination sometimes. Go wif the flow rite?