How to move on? Cannot get over the hurt and anger


New Member
It's always simple...
When you encounter a puzzle...
"Just get to the gate..."
When you have no money...
"Just pay the fine..."

Why is it so tough... for so many people here...
to realize...

If there is a choice, nobody will want to be unhappy.

Then there will be no depression...
no risk...
no suicide...


New Member
For guys it's really just pick up and move on and no point assigning blame? Then wouldn't it be very easy for men to marry their affair partners????


Well-Known Member
Hi Yi Ling, normally the person that initiates the break up has already deal with all the internal struggles before coming to the decision. While you are only coming to terms, the other party has already moved on. This is not a gender thing.

The reason why it is pointless to assign blame is actually obvious. What do you achieve by blaming? It is a very instinctive thing to do, when struggling to accept, we will instinctively blame. But, when we calm down and look at things, what's the point to hold on further? We can only excuse ourselves initially for being emotional. Over longer period of time, the responsibility to cope with one's emotions is largely ourselves. The marriage is over period. You have to deal with what's to come. Your kids, your life, your future.

Letting go is for your own sake. Holding on will only make you stay miserable longer. Once again, I assure you, no one is trivializing what you are going through. Get all the support, friends and family, counseling etc to vent the resentments building up. You have to face it yourself. This is what 'almost' everyone is telling you. You will be emotional, you will cry, there will be low periods. But, you are not alone. Stats of divorce are raising in most developed urbanize countries. Millions are and will be going through what you are going through.

The decision to move on gives you the goal. Something to work towards. It doesn't give u the magic pill. Logical facts are emotionless and neutral. If tells you where you are heading. The more you allow emotions to run your decision, the more helpless you will be. You will feel you cannot help it at all. We get better through practice in everything. The more you face it and try to cope with, the better you will deal with it over time. There is no secret to it.


New Member
Not all guys are the same.

Even IQ levels...

I am facing morons everyday in Singapore.

Government depts ain't working...
Excuses offered are stupid...

They are gainfully employed.

Blame not the guys.

It's your choice, and that's the consequence you have to deal with. So...
When you come to the next relationship, don't play play.


Active Member
"For guys it's really just pick up and move on and no point assigning blame? Then wouldn't it be very easy for men to marry their affair partners????"

I don't think you understand at all. Moving on and not assigning blame is for our own good. It has nothing to do with ease of marrying affair partners.

If you can't move and forever stuck.. you are the only one suffering..


Active Member
Scope has said:

"If there is a choice, nobody will want to be unhappy. "

But being happy is also a choice. We can CHOOSE to be happy. It is a conscious decision we can make to be happy and not be dependent upon other external factor.


New Member
hey girl,

not sure the whole situation of yours, however i hope you love yourself more from now onwards, okay? no matter how bitter e situation is, grit ur teeth and hang on there, especially you have two young kids that need u badly..


New Member

If it were to be so simple... psychiatrists will be out of business, and there will be no need for drugs to calm people down...


You know the problem about Milo Meelo and the likes... he likes to give moronic low IQ 'advice' that usually challenges basic common sense.

He calls me 'sicko' when I mentioned Kerin Peh...

Now may I ask ALL of you. If Kerin Peh is still alive and still depressed, do you think telling her all those craps... you know, 'Be happy lah, make the decision to forget lah, don't commit suicide lah' will help?

It's as if telling Kerin, "Hey! You CHOOSE to be unhappy, you CHOOSE to be depressed, you CHOOSE to not recover, and you CHOOSE not to make sense..."

Tell me, Sm...

Who is the real sicko?

If there is a choice, nobody doesn't want a perfect smiling world... If there is a choice, everyone wants Happy hormones.

The problem is... to external factor such as me killing Yi Ling's children, a rapist rapes her, she catches HIV from her husband, or she is punched... it's not her 'conscious choice' to be happy.

This is IMPOSSIBLE in psychology if we go technical.

I have NEVER come across a natural psychological state people are advising Yi Ling to attain on her own to be possible. That excludes consent to hypnotizing or drugs...

IF Yi Ling is Kerin Peh, she'd have a much higher chance of survival with me than going to those counselors in Singapore... for obvious reasons...


Well-Known Member
"IF Yi Ling is Kerin Peh, she'd have a much higher chance of survival with me than going to those counselors in Singapore... for obvious reasons..."

It is OBVIOUS you have lots of experience with mental issues seeing how delusional you are. This is the reason why you cannot get a job. Your mental records. You are really very sick.

Everyone deal with their problems in life. Those that couldn't will need additional help, while the vast majority wiil learn from the experience itself. If TS is suffering from depression, for sure, she needs to seek professional help. It might not work but surely better than trusting a mental patient. You probably never pick up any lessons because of your special needs, parents still supporting you till this day. Stupid jobless bum, can you even afford a computer and broadband connection yourself.


New Member

There was a story...

A rich man was stuck on the roof as the flood level rose and rose to his knee level, the devoted man prayed to God "God saves me!".

Then came an ugly wood floating by...
He ignored and hope the wood won't crush into him.

Then came a ball floating by...
He ignored the small ball...

Then he drowned and cursed God for not helping him... like sending a team of qualified rescuers to him...



Well-Known Member
good story.... there are professional counselors with experience, people that went through divorces etc offering advises.... the whole team of "qualified rescuers"

None but SCOPE is the solution. Even though scope doesn't even have a job, underwent any professional training, hasn't even married nor have kids. He is the guru that understands all, you must go to the stupid blog of endless self portrays of a sicko face. Hilarious indeed. Very relevant frankly. INTERESTING!


New Member

You made me laugh.

There was indeed... 'professional and qualified rescuers' who knew of Kerin Peh's situation... and to see her die...

There were also cases... of 'professional and qualified' doctors who CHOSE to see the patients die and did nothing.

Milo Meelo, when are you going to wise up... and stop being a moron.

Of course hilarious... because you or your loved ones ain't going to die... you can say whatever you want.



Well-Known Member
Stop bringing her up. There are millions of people that have commit suicide, you idiot. No doctor can for sure save every patient. Anyone that claims he can, is lying. It is a total moot point to keep harping that there are patients the died in the care of a doctor. The conclusion that the treatment is useless and ineffective is so lame. Anyone knows that for a fact, but you must just twist obvious facts to talk rubbish.

We visit this point many times before and you admitted you ASSUMED. You did not know Kerrin Peh nor her family and have any information at all of what treatment or support she got. YOU HAVE NO DAMN BLOODY CLUE but to keep making more and more irresponsible comments and assumptions.

Sick bum, stop adding salt to her loved ones that is recovering from the lost.

"Of course hilarious... because you or your loved ones ain't going to die... you can say whatever you want." Every one of these stupid comments applies very well to you. Stop wasting your parents money living a parasitic life. Stop trolling, you idiot. Whatever humor in a joke is long gone with you repeating... you are completely sick.

You are so sure doctors cannot help because you felt they couldn't help your condition.


New Member

You have very elastic perceptions of events...

Typical moron...

So what you refuse to face reality...

But I only deal with those who choose to come. As for those who choose not to... I am not Jesus, I can't be bothered.

Whatever the treatment I DO NOT need to know.

I only know, and it's a known fact: She is dead, in an island of Milo Meelos...

And other people can die too.

That's all I need to know.

Moron... is just moronic. LOL~


Well-Known Member
"But I only deal with those who choose to come"

Lame marketing pitch... just like your endless stupid photos in your blog.

No one is coming, that's why you are so hard up to market for your CRAP.

I repeat....
No doctor can for sure save every patient. Anyone that claims he can, is lying. It is a total moot point to keep harping that there are patients the died in the care of a doctor. The conclusion that the treatment is useless and ineffective is so lame. Anyone knows that for a fact, but you must just twist obvious facts to talk rubbish.


New Member
Marketing? LOL~

It's best no one coming... But I can't be sure, because people DID come.

You know... you like to assume so much, but you are lame...

Did you realize what I am talking about...

The doctors I mentioned COULD have saved the patients, but they REFUSED to carry out the operation. UNDERSTAND?

They ALL rather see the patients die due to move a finger. They opted.

Please use your fugging for once, man...


There you were, deeply involved in a relationship. It may have been stormy or you may have thought everything was running smoothly. Then it happened: Your significant other no longer wanted to be your significant other. This scenario happens almost every moment of every day, but when it happens to you, your whole world can focus on this. Many people that do not want the relationship to end will go into a panic to keep the relationship alive. Most of these attempts are in vain. When a relationship ends, it can be a heartbreaking, emotionally crippling time, and there are strategies you can implement to learn to let it go.

It is important to understand that as much as you may wish, you simply cannot control another person's thoughts or feelings. Even if you feel they are unjustly ending the relationship or you do not see any logic in their choice, they possess the freewill to do with their life as they wish. It is sometimes enormously painful to accept this fact, especially if you feel you have given so much of yourself to this other person. When they choose to walk away from you, you may feel a very strong craving to stop the progress of their actions. When feeling that you deserve something from this person, it can cause you to behave in very improper way. This behavior is detrimental to your emotional wellbeing.

There is no debate regarding the poignant pain that is involved in a breakup or divorce. There is not a magic way to completely stop the misery you will feel from the loss of this person. However, there is a way to control these feelings. No amount of pleading, begging or bribery can change how a person feels about you. Once you accept this fact, you can then move on to take actions to behave dignified and accept the end of the relationship with your esteem intact.

If the following sounds familiar, you have not learned the art of letting go. When faced with the end of a relationship, have you called that person endlessly will pleas to be reunited? Have you contacted the other person and promised to change your behavior to better accommodate their needs? Have you attempted repeatedly to question them as to why they are choosing to leave you? All of these are clear-cut signs that you have a difficult time letting a dead relationship go. All of these signs only make the situation worse for you.

When pleading with another person to "begin loving you again", you are setting yourself up for disaster. You cannot talk someone into loving you. You may be a wonderful, caring, kind and compassionate person, however if someone who was in your life does not feel they want continue the relationship, you cannot force them. You already must deal with the loss of the relationship. Love is a choice of freewill. To beg, plead or otherwise, will only lead to feeling defeated once again.

It is exceedingly difficult indeed, to control the desire to reach out to the person who left you. When you are so used to conversations with them or seeing this person everyday, it will throw your world upside-down when you must deal with a sudden end of communication and a physical connection. Realizing that calling the person, trying to "accidentally run into them" or other means of contact is futile, you must learn to distance yourself. This must be done in the name of self-respect.

If you can be emotionally strong enough to know that nothing you do can bring this person back to you, you can leave with dignity. If you harass this person, in an attempt to reunite, added suffering is imminent. It can be so frustrating to plead, beg and try to persuade someone and have him or her repeatedly reject you. The best road to take is one of complete and utter non-communication. Once knowing you do not possess the power to control their feelings and actions, control your behavior. You will have moments of weakness and there are steps you can take to overcome these.

Resist the urge to "show up accidentally" in places that you know you will run into them. You may think it is a great idea to spend hours making yourself look fantastic and then going to a restaurant, bar or otherwise that the person frequents. Your plan will be to show them how wonderful you look and they will regret their mistake of leaving you. Your plan will actually make the other person fully aware of your plan, and they will think your plan is pitiable. Whatever reason they had for leaving the relationship, whether unfounded or not, will remain intact. Flaunting yourself in front of them is akin to screaming out, "Look at me! Why do you not want me?". Do you really want to seem that deprived?

Do everything possible to stop yourself from calling them on the telephone. Delete their number from your cell phone. Another good option is to leave their number, but to change their contact name to something along the lines of, "No! He/she treated me horribly". This is a good strategy to prevent you from calling them, in the moments that you are feeling weak. You can also tape a note to your home phones. One suggestion is to write something such as, "Do not call him/her, they broke your heart and you will look like a fool if you keep calling!". These may sound rather silly now, but when in a state of a broken heart, it is common to act irrationally and these tips can stop your foolish behavior.

If you are used to instant messaging with this other person, and you wish to leave your messenger intact on your computer for messaging with others, there are several options. Firstly, you should opt to create a new user name and inform only your friends, family and others that you do wish to communicate with of your new name. If you choose to keep your user name, obviously, you should delete your ex's name off your list. If you are not emotionally strong enough to do so yet, you should at least opt to change their contact name, so that their name will show as "Ex- do not IM him/her!" or anything that will prompt you to not contact them.

You may feel a very strong urge to leave phone messages, or offline instant messages to the other person who left the relationship. You may feel you have an endless array of things to say to this person. Alternatively, you may feel you must get the last word in, but it never ends there. If you allow yourself to leave these messages, you will always find something new to add. The other person is most probably ignoring or deleting your messages, it will not bring them back to you, and all of your efforts will be in vain. Once you have implemented the means to prevent yourself from contacting them, do realize this: As absurd as it sounds at the moment, as much as your heart is aching, as much as you feel you were unfairly treated, as much as you feel you know you were the "best thing to ever happen" to them, time will change your feelings.

It is one of the most frequently used clichés when a relationship ends; however, time does heal all wounds. When using the term "heal" this does not mean that you forget this person forever. It does not mean that you will live the rest of your life without this person's name or image appearing in your mind. It does mean that given a certain amount of time, the image and memories of this person will fade.

If you follow these guidelines to end the relationship quickly and not drag the breakup into a long process, there will be a day, not too far in the future, that you realize this person was not the right one for you. You desire a good person, someone who cares for you unconditionally, someone to support your decisions, and someone to walk through life with. If this person leaves you, heartbroken and alone, they are proving they possess none of the qualities that you were looking for in a mate. You may feel misled, lied to, or tricked. The reality remains that they ultimately did not measure up to having the qualities needed in a relationship with you.

At one time or another we have all wished we had the power to make someone loves us. We have prayed for their return. We have deprived ourselves from sleep while pondering what we could have done to stop them from leaving. We have spent endless hours wondering how they could leave us. In the end, all of that time spent is needlessly, we will never obtain the answers. Only one fact remains: Everyone has freewill to do as they wish. When a person leaves you, learn to let it go.


New Member
60secs, I like yr advice. I did do those things when I discovered the affair, it really made me seemed like a fool and it actually added to my suffering. Thanks.


New Member

I think this is the second time he pasted that article.

To be honest...

I don't trust women. I mean I don't trust women's 'love'.

Women like you who'd get hit so hard because of falling out of love... makes me wonder sometimes.

Perhaps it takes a fool to love a jerk... to be capable of love? LOL~

But I don't like fools...

Foolish women will also fall in love... with another jerk and break my heart. But women who are too smart cannot be trusted to love.


Nothing ever made sense.


maybe they left you not because they found someone else? they should never have been with you, smart or not they did the next best thing as quickly they could. self preservation is a strong impetus.


Active Member
huh? if u're talking abt Scope... they should leave him even if they hadn't found someone else... 15mins of coffee should pretty much expose the hollow in the heart n head.... u know? like in the hollow caves...when u whisper into his ears u can probably hear your own echoes...


New Member
It's just a general and old 'philosophy'.

It is said that... only the fools (among women) will taste true love, because the smart women will try to jump here and there and break men's hearts... and suffer in an empty room as their smart choices turn to prey upon other women...


" Semen can be an indication of a man's health status. Normal semen is usually cloudy white or grayish in color. It has a chlorine smell. It is slightly sweet due to high content of sugar (fructose) produced in the seminal vesicles. Taste of sperm may vary depending on a man's diet.

You might find it surprising, but there are quite a few studies out there which discuss the health benefits of semen. Research shows that semen acts as an anti-depressant. Exposure to semen can make a woman happy. Semen contains these natural mood-boosting chemicals - cortisol, serotonin, oxytocin, prolactin, melatonin and estrone.

Recently, Austrian researchers found that spermidine, a compound found in semen, has anti-aging effects. Tests conducted on mice showed that those who were fed with spermidine lived longer and remained younger by 33% than those mice that did not receive the substance. They also found out that it could prevent Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease.

Swallowing semen will not harm you as long as your partner is healthy and tested to be free from STDs "